Posts by brightotter7

I've been getting into recreational boxing for a few months now, and honestly, everything's going pretty well. But I have noticed one thing—my calves and shins start hurting during training, especially when we're working on jumps, skipping rope, and stuff like that. It feels almost like my calves are cramping up. I guess I'm wondering if anyone knows what might be causing this or how I could deal with the pain?

1) It might be fine, I guess, but it’s way better when there’s actually some substance to it
2) Compromises
3) Why do dogs lick themselves there?

Alright, looks like this topic hit a nerve since you guys have a lot to say. Since I can't get to everyone individually right now, let's clarify: I'm not really talking about low self-esteem causing social isolation here. It's more about just not being interested. As I'm typing this, I accidentally left Zoom on active mode and spent half an hour stuck in some pointless "Hey, how's it going? Good, you?" loop with an acquaintance. To me, that's just scripted small talk that doesn't actually achieve anything. Honestly, I feel like there's way too much communication these days—phones, IMs, chats, whatever 🙂

Anyway, Natch, you've got a point. Growing up, I was rarely part of big social circles, mostly because they felt so sluggish—that whole "if you want to fit in, you have to act like this" mentality. I think I had much higher quality connections with just a few close friends, and those hangouts didn't feel like those forced, cookie-cutter group dynamics.

I also never really dealt with that FOMO feeling where you think you'll miss out on something huge if you don't go out tonight. I was perfectly fine staying home to read or work on something I actually cared about. I guess that definitely left me a bit awkward when it comes to larger groups or those specific social situations—things like figuring out where you fit in the hierarchy (which nobody talks about, but everyone feels), making eye contact, or picking up on unwritten social codes.

On the flip side, I don't view the whole thing—the codes, the hierarchies, the group stuff—as inherently bad or gross. I've realized there are actually some benefits to it, and I'd like to try putting a little effort into navigating that better.

Now that I've laid all this out, I feel like I sound like some grumpy old man lecturing everyone, which isn't what I am 🙂 so sorry if that came off a bit stiff. Anyway, it's late and I'm crashing... Zzzzz

Jamie Chase6 said:It’s possible you’re just missing things that don't interest you. That doesn't mean you lack the ability; it just means you aren't paying attention because you don't care. IF you actually cared, you'd be soaking up every single signal from your surroundings. Have you ever considered that maybe it isn't an inability at all? 😉

Yeah, probably. I guess I just hate that it makes me look confused to everyone else. Usually, when I'm walking down the street, I don't really notice people passing by because I'm stuck in my own head. I get lost in my thoughts pretty easily just to tune out whatever is happening around me at the moment. 🙂 Sometimes that feeling of being totally disconnected from everyone else just gets on my nerves. 🙂

I'm not sure if "social intelligence" is even the right term for this, but feel free to set me straight if I'm off base 🙂

So, look, I'm just not great at navigating group dynamics or picking up on those unspoken social cues. To give you an idea: say I’m out at a bar with my buddies, and I am definitely NOT going to notice if some girl is checking me out. Like, a friend will go, "Hey, she's looking at you," and I'll just stare back totally clueless, wondering why she'd be interested in *me*. Then another friend chimes in and confirms it, and I’m still just sitting there like... what? It's the same deal with all those tiny little signals people throw around in groups. Sometimes I feel like a complete idiot because there's this constant stream of information flying around me and I'm just missing it entirely. I don't really care much about what someone's wearing, what kind of car they drive, or obsessing over every little detail—unless it's actually a juicy story, obviously. I'm not socially awkward or anything; I can hold a conversation and I love a good joke, but I guess I just miss the subtleties.
Anyone else deal with this? How would you even label it? Am I just the guy sitting in the cave planning the strategy while everyone else is busy hunting mammoths? Help!

Check this out http://forum.teretana.net/ it’s got a ton of solid, vetted advice that actually works if you're looking to

So, about four weeks ago I got into a car accident and broke the middle finger on my right hand. I had it patched up at the ER, but even after a month, I still can't straighten the finger. I went back for a follow-up at the hospital, and the doctor was being pretty vague—mentioning maybe physical therapy or some rare tendon issue, I guess. Since the ER is basically a conveyor belt where they rush you through in like three minutes per person, I really want a second opinion. Does anyone know a good private orthopedic specialist, ideally someone who focuses on hand injuries, in the greater Chicago area?

Thanks!