Handling/Troubleshooting
in Psychology ·
cosmicdrifter37 said:This might sound a little ridiculous—honestly, maybe it actually is—but I’d really appreciate getting some outside perspective on something that’s been bugging me. I know this guy—we aren't exactly friends, more like casual acquaintances—and he has this relentless, almost aggressive need to shake hands with everyone he encounters. It isn't just a one-off thing either; it’s been going on for a long time. Now, look, I get shaking hands with a buddy or someone you haven't seen in a while, but with people you just pass by in a hallway where a quick "hey" or a nod would suffice? To me, that feels like way too much. He honestly looks like he's in a race just to get to someone's hand. I don't know if this is trivial, but I find myself wondering about the psychological profile of someone like that. Since my own understanding of human behavior is pretty limited, I was hoping someone might take a moment to shed some light on this—admittedly odd, but genuinely curious—behavioral quirk.
Thanks in advance.
If he’s doing this consciously, he’s likely trying to force his way into a larger social circle. It looks like a power play—trying to establish himself as a dominant figure by imposing his presence on others while simultaneously attempting to embed himself with the masses.
The root cause could be anything. He might be unhappy with his current social standing, or perhaps he’s dealing with local friction or enemies in his immediate circle. There’s even a chance it stems from dissatisfaction in his personal life, leading him to mimic (poorly) certain behaviors he thinks will guarantee him success.
If you want to pin down exactly why he acts this way, try testing him next time you have to shake his hand.
Offer your hand with the palm slightly upturned and give him a grip that’s just a bit firmer than his. The next time, do the same thing, but go a step further: grab his hand with your other hand or give him a pat on the shoulder.
Regardless, make sure you maintain direct eye contact during the handshake.
Watch his reaction during and immediately after the interaction. Pay close attention to how he handles every subsequent handshake.
If his behavior doesn't make sense to you, post your observations here.
As a last resort, just ask him straight out why he does it and tell him how odd it seems.
Just watch closely how he reacts and what he says.