Extended stays - what are your experiences?
in Students & Teens ·
Justin Allen81 said:Our daughter is in third grade and has finally started walking home solo—she took her first trip about two weeks ago, then again yesterday. This morning was her first time heading to school by herself.🎉
I’ll admit, I’m still a nervous wreck—the anxiety is real—but she calls me every single time before she sets off so I know roughly how long she'll be. I just watch her from the window.😁
I’m actually home right now since I’m in my 35th week of pregnancy; I stopped working this past Monday. Ideally, I should be resting, but we live on the third floor of an apartment building, and trekking down those stairs several times a day is a struggle. Besides, we figured it was high time she gained some independence. It’s the perfect chance for her to get used to the routine while I'm around, so she isn't just wandering an empty house when she gets back.
Up until now, one of us has always walked her to and from school—one parent in the morning, the other in the afternoon. We both work standard 9-to-5 jobs, but usually, one of us would head in early and leave around 4:15 just to make sure we could pick her up by 4:40 or so.
Now, I’m torn. Some people say third grade is too early for a kid to walk alone, others say it’s late—it’s subjective, I suppose. We made the call based on two specific factors:
First, the traffic. We live right in the heart of Washington, D.C., and the school is incredibly close—literally a three-minute walk away once she crosses two intersections and hits the school street. But honestly? Drivers here are absolute savages. They know they're near a school, they see the kids, they see the "School Zone" signs, there are crosswalks and lights everywhere... yet people drive like maniacs. They blow through red lights, ignore pedestrians, and park all over the sidewalks, forcing you to walk into the street just to get around them. Then you have people stopping dead in the middle of a crosswalk just to stare at their phones. It’s a level of chaos in the middle of a major metropolis that is frankly infuriating. She’s a very cautious kid, but until now, we were simply too terrified to let her go solo.
The second reason is what rowdypanther12 mentioned—avoiding having her home alone. It's not that she'd burn the house down; she's responsible and bright—it's just that she hates being by herself. She never had any interest in leaving after-school programs early if she knew the house would be empty until 5:00. Now that I'm home, she happily packs up after lunch at school and heads straight back.😁
The first time she went alone, I nearly died of fright. A trip that should take three minutes took her twenty. She just couldn't find me, you know? When she stepped out into the street... I watched her from the window and almost died laughing. Every car that passed, she'd dodge; she'd touch every wall, peer at things on the ground, poke at bushes... she was moving like she’d been caught in a storm. I gave her a bit of a lecture the moment she walked through the door, explaining that she can't move quite that cautiously.😁 The second time, she was back in a flash.
She just called me to say she's coming home; I’m going to go crochet by the window.😁
A third grader walking home alone is perfectly fine, so don't sweat it 🙂
But I feel like I’m talking to a wall—my oldest is in fifth grade, and I still find myself hovering by the window waiting for him to walk through the door.
And don't even get me started on my younger one, who’s currently in that same third-grade stage.
At our local elementary school, they only offer after-school programs for first and second graders, which includes lunch.