Why my relationships always fail
in Psychology & Therapy ·
feralharbor13 said:I honestly don’t get people... I look pretty good for my age—definitely younger than the calendar says—and I don't feel the need to put on some fake persona. I just show up as myself. I’m straight up about who I am, what I bring to the table, what I’m looking for, and yeah, even my flaws and weaknesses. Most people out there dating today are just playing characters. They inflate their egos, exaggerate how great they are, hide their baggage, or straight-up lie about things. It’s exhausting. I stay spontaneous and real, and honestly, people usually dig that. I actually know how to pay attention and listen... but eventually, my mind starts wandering. You can tell exactly when someone starts losing interest, when they start dodging you or pulling away. Or, on the flip side, they become incredibly needy, blowing up my phone constantly. Sometimes it feels like they're just performing. My focus shifts elsewhere, and before you know it, we’re basically strangers living in the same house. I’m in my own little world, he’s in his, and we’re talking past each other. There’s this massive disconnect, this feeling that someone is sitting right next to you but they're miles away, impossible to truly reach or understand. It always ends the same way: either I lose interest and end it, or he leaves me, or he starts cheating because my drive just tanks. The sex is great at first, but then it gets boring and predictable. Suddenly, he wants more and more, and it starts feeling like a chore—like some obligation I have to fulfill just to keep him around.
If you're this disconnected in actual relationships, I'd say there isn't a single person out there who would feel relaxed or at peace with you. Your focus shifts at irregular intervals; it's impossible to follow your train of thought. And once someone finally manages to catch up, all they get is a complaint about how nothing and nobody works, including yourself. You're like a puzzle with missing pieces.