Posts by Harold Wilson5

Thanks everyone for the unexpectedly positive responses and for being so understanding! 🙂

A lot of people suggested I should switch careers or that my current job just isn't fulfilling, but that's not quite it. That’s why it was actually pretty hard for me to pinpoint the exact issue and even start this thread, though I think Joseph Watson3 and addx really hit the nail on the head regarding the core problem.
I actually enjoy my profession, but this whole concept of working a rigid 8-hour day—regardless of whether it's productive or necessary—just doesn't sit right with me. I feel like I could utilize my skills much more intelligently if I could just distribute them throughout the day (and yes, that would include work).

Joseph Watson3 said:It sounds like you just finally saw through the social conditioning—that whole myth that everyone needs to grind eight hours a day (or chase some grand career) and somehow find deep fulfillment in it. It's total bullshit.
There are much bigger things in life than that.

Once you see the truth, there’s no going back.

And once you pivot to working maybe four hours a day—or better yet, just a few hours a week—doors open up that people stuck in the daily 9-to-5 rat race can't even begin to wrap their heads around.
If you actually have the option to work less, why on earth would you work more just because society tells you that's how it's done? It's pretty nonsensical.

This is truly eye-opening (and not the first time you've said something like this).
I assume you were in the exact same situation, because this resonates 100%.
Now I just need to figure out what the alternative actually looks like. I suppose it happens gradually rather than all at once?

hiddeneagle98 said:I honestly don't see what the big deal is here. If you ask me, that’s just sound reasoning.

Sooner or later, you eventually hit this realization that all that relentless ambition? Most of the time, you’re just building someone else’s empire instead of your own. You sit there thinking your talents and skills are your own, but they end up serving everyone around you except yourself. It’s exhausting. It’s like being a disposable battery—you pour everything you have into a device, draining yourself dry just to power up someone else's life, while your own clock is ticking away. Think about it: isn't the whole point of living to actually use your time for something meaningful? If you spend your entire existence just auctioning off your abilities to the highest bidder, you aren't living a life; you’re just a high-end laborer in a gilded cage. That’s nothing more than a sophisticated form of servitude. You're essentially living an empty life to facilitate the success of another person. And even if you actually do manage to find a way to monetize what you're good at, there’s a trap waiting right there, too. Once you start seeing those quick wins—where you can pull in more money with half the effort compared to the guy next to you—it starts messing with your head. Your ego begins to swell, you start getting cocky, and before you know it, you're making all sorts of reckless, self-destructive decisions because you think you've finally beaten the system. It's a lose-lose situation if you aren't careful.

What does it even mean to be "well-known in your field"? Is that supposed to be a goal? Like, when you walk down the street, do you want to feel everyone—from total strangers to old colleagues and acquaintances—looking at you with this sense of respect? Honestly, that whole idea has always made me feel incredibly awkward. It’s uncomfortable. If I’m being real, if I let out a loud fart while everyone is staring at me in reverence, the whole illusion falls apart immediately. I don't see how that's a legitimate objective. To me, recognition should only ever be collateral damage. You focus on doing what you love, you lean into your talent, and you work with actual passion. If people notice you because you're genuinely good at what you do, fine—that's just a byproduct. But suddenly having to play a part or put on some kind of persona just because you've become "somebody" is exhausting. You shouldn't have to act like a certain version of yourself just to satisfy an audience when all you really want is to just exist and do your work.

Well, that was just an illustration to say I didn't see myself as just middle management, but rather at the top—not for the sake of others, but because everything felt so easy for me that aiming higher felt like a more challenging goal. 🙂

I’m not quite sure where to begin this story.

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve always been ahead of the curve. School was honestly too easy for me—even through high school—so I would breeze through with straight A's without much effort. To keep things interesting and feed my ambition, I’d constantly push myself by entering competitions and taking on extra extracurricular activities.
Eventually, I decided to pursue a demanding university degree that would finally offer a real challenge and set the stage for a solid career path.
Back then, I had this clear vision of myself as a high-powered executive or running my own company.

Everything changed during my college years when my brother passed away suddenly. That was the turning point for me.
It was almost like a sudden realization hit me: so many things in life just aren't worth the stress. For instance, I stopped feeling guilty about postponing an exam or even failing one if I felt like it.
Even so, I managed to graduate on time and landed a great job.

At the same time, while we were always close, I found myself growing even closer to my parents. They mean the world to me, and now, I have a wonderful husband and our family life is incredibly harmonious.

Now, after five years on the job, I’m feeling something I’ve never felt before: complete burnout. Even though my job is dynamic and actually pretty cool, I feel like there just aren't enough hours in the day to enjoy my own life.
I suppose it’s a combination of
- the fact that nothing feels challenging enough anymore. I work way faster than my colleagues, so I'm left with a choice: either pull a double workload for the same pay, or spend half my shift surfing the web or reading, which eventually gets boring.
- my brother's passing and the realization that my happiest moments are spent with family and friends. Now, those eight hours at the office—plus the hour or so I spend commuting—feel like wasted time.
- the fact that my husband and I managed to get ahead of our finances early on, especially regarding our housing situation, so I don't have that crushing financial pressure forcing me to stay.
- the age gap at work; most of my colleagues are much older, so there isn't really any social buzz or grabbing drinks after work—it's just strictly showing up for eight hours and leaving.
- watching the bosses and owners grind for ten or more hours every single day, living in constant stress over monthly targets.

I caught myself thinking the other day that by my late thirties or early forties, I’d much rather work just four hours a day at a relaxed pace, maybe something remote, or even just retire early to focus on being present for my family, future children, and friends.
I honestly have no idea where that ambitious girl went—the one who wanted to be number one and a leader in her field.

I don't know what I want from this thread. Maybe I just need to vent, or perhaps I want to see if others have gone through this. Was this just a phase for you, or did it stick?

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Does this also apply to students studying outside of the US? 🙂