Donna Reyes11 said:Hi everyone
I’ve been following this forum for a long time, but I’m finally reaching out because the post above really hit home.
My mom was diagnosed with lung cancer back in July 2019—a 9x6 cm tumor with three spots on her liver, the largest being 2.5 cm.
After four rounds of cisplatin plus pemetrexed, the tumor shrank down to 6x4, and those liver spots looked more like minor lesions. However, she could only handle one more dose of cisplatin because her kidney function started failing. Around New Year's, Mom seemed to be doing okay—she was walking 1.9 miles a day, eating, and had lost some weight, which actually looked healthy for her; things felt relatively stable,
But at the start of the year, she received two more immunotherapy sessions (just pemetrexed), and then everything started crashing fast. By February, she couldn't even lift her legs and stopped walking. In March, a PET scan showed the tumor had grown to 12 cm, and the liver spots were widespread, with the largest hitting 10 cm.
Mom came to stay with us then, and she hasn't left our side since. In the meantime, she had one immunotherapy session, but she missed the next one scheduled three weeks ago because her liver enzymes are just through the roof. They are right on the edge.
Mom is mostly bedridden now. Every third day, she spends the entire day vomiting; there are days when she recovers enough to eat a little, and then there are the bad ones. She can barely make it to the bathroom. Hospice arrived yesterday to start her IV fluids, and palliative care is coming on Monday. We also have someone coming once a week to help bathe her. At first, she struggled to walk, then she used a cane, then a walker... but after just three days, everything becomes a struggle again. What’s really worrying me is that her abdomen is getting larger every single day, even though she takes medication for dehydration, her legs are swollen, and three days ago, Mom became completely disoriented. She’s mumbling things that don't make sense. She even knows she's talking nonsense, which frustrates her because she can't find the words she wants to say. She can't even figure out how to find or read a text message anymore. This all started three days ago, and it seems to get worse every day.
We are supposed to go for a PET scan this Monday, and I've already arranged transportation. Today, Mom told me she doesn't want to go. I know she has the right to refuse; honestly, what difference does a PET scan or the results make? It’s clear to us that there are no more curative treatments left for her... the hospice worker told me that since she's her mother, she wouldn't force her, and I'm grateful for that honesty, but how do you just give up? When is it time to stop?
And then I come across this post above mentioning that when the liver starts going, it's a matter of weeks.
What do you all think? Has anyone been in this situation? Should we do the PET scan—yes or no? I know that after the scan, Mom will be so exhausted she’ll probably spend the whole next day vomiting.
Unfortunately, based on what you've described, it sounds like the liver is slowly losing its ability to function. This leads to things like fluid buildup in the abdomen due to low protein levels, which then spills over into swelling in the legs, along with everything else. As for the confusion and incoherent speech, that can also be a result of declining liver function, or it's possible the disease has spread to the brain. In any case, given the overall picture, I wouldn't recommend putting her through additional testing. There isn't any practical benefit for her from these scans, and it would only cause unnecessary physical "torture." The focus should be on symptomatic therapy—which it looks like she is already receiving—to try and make her remaining time as comfortable as possible. If you ever need some kind of psychological support, feel free to send me a DM and I can put you in touch with someone.