I'm constantly overextending myself for others, but I get nothing in return (men are the worst)
in Psychology & Therapy ·
I’ve struggled with low self-esteem and a lack of confidence my entire life. Because of that, I tend to be emotionally withdrawn. I’ve always viewed others as more valuable, more popular, and just better than me. For the most part, that was true. I usually sat at the bottom of the social ladder, and quite often, I was the one people disliked.
I honestly don't know why. I’m actually a very emotional person; I care deeply about people and think about them constantly. I have immense respect for almost everyone, unless they start attacking or bullying me. In those cases, like anyone else, I stand up for myself and fight back.
The difference is, I can't just shrug off an argument like other people do. I don't just forget it in five minutes. Instead, I’m usually left feeling incredibly guilty, like I failed again. It seems I have a conscience, which clearly doesn't mean much to most people.
I’ve dealt with constant mistreatment from certain people, so I eventually stopped trying with them. It always ends the same way: people try to put me down just to feel smarter, more important, or superior. I’ve had an unbelievable amount of bad experiences with people.
I don't know if anyone else here has dealt with as many negative interactions as I have. Most of them stem from me talking too much or reacting too quickly, even though I never actually mean anything malicious (unlike some people). Now, those "other people" are the ones who are socially valued and doing great, while I get ignored by all sorts of people simply because I talk too much or say things that hit too close to home. It’s not that I think poorly of them—actually, it's the opposite—it's just that my mouth moves faster than my brain. By the time I realize what I've said, the damage is done, and they hold it against me forever.
My most recent bad experience happened on the road. Some guy attacked me because I hesitated a second too long when trying to merge onto a highway, even though there was zero chance I could have pulled out safely with the traffic moving that fast. He lashed out at me. I reacted impulsively and nearly got punched in the face. But after that, the responses I got from people on this forum absolutely floored me. They made me question my own sanity. It feels like there are way too many crazies out there protecting one another, especially when it comes to defending someone who violently attacks a woman. Most of the people in that thread seemed to agree that it’s OK for a man to lash out and beat a woman if she flips him off after he’s been harassing her. It used to be considered normal to slap a man if he was being rude or disrespectful, but apparently now you aren't allowed to react to anything he says?
I honestly don't know why. I’m actually a very emotional person; I care deeply about people and think about them constantly. I have immense respect for almost everyone, unless they start attacking or bullying me. In those cases, like anyone else, I stand up for myself and fight back.
The difference is, I can't just shrug off an argument like other people do. I don't just forget it in five minutes. Instead, I’m usually left feeling incredibly guilty, like I failed again. It seems I have a conscience, which clearly doesn't mean much to most people.
I’ve dealt with constant mistreatment from certain people, so I eventually stopped trying with them. It always ends the same way: people try to put me down just to feel smarter, more important, or superior. I’ve had an unbelievable amount of bad experiences with people.
I don't know if anyone else here has dealt with as many negative interactions as I have. Most of them stem from me talking too much or reacting too quickly, even though I never actually mean anything malicious (unlike some people). Now, those "other people" are the ones who are socially valued and doing great, while I get ignored by all sorts of people simply because I talk too much or say things that hit too close to home. It’s not that I think poorly of them—actually, it's the opposite—it's just that my mouth moves faster than my brain. By the time I realize what I've said, the damage is done, and they hold it against me forever.
My most recent bad experience happened on the road. Some guy attacked me because I hesitated a second too long when trying to merge onto a highway, even though there was zero chance I could have pulled out safely with the traffic moving that fast. He lashed out at me. I reacted impulsively and nearly got punched in the face. But after that, the responses I got from people on this forum absolutely floored me. They made me question my own sanity. It feels like there are way too many crazies out there protecting one another, especially when it comes to defending someone who violently attacks a woman. Most of the people in that thread seemed to agree that it’s OK for a man to lash out and beat a woman if she flips him off after he’s been harassing her. It used to be considered normal to slap a man if he was being rude or disrespectful, but apparently now you aren't allowed to react to anything he says?