Did the brawl in paradise actually happen?
in Psychology ·
Hey everyone! I actually just stumbled upon this forum by total accident, but honestly, after seeing what’s being said here, I just had to jump in and share my two cents. In my opinion, if a parent thinks their only tool is hitting or spanking, they aren't really seeing their kids as actual human beings. To me, that kind of stuff feels more like training an animal than actually raising a child. No matter how old they get or how little they are, kids have their own desires and their own reasons for things—even if those reasons seem totally irrational or silly to us adults. Like, if a ten-year-old refuses to go to bed, I bet if you actually asked them WHY, they’d have an answer for you! You could probably work out a compromise just by talking through that reason. But instead of a conversation, some people just go straight to punishment or physical discipline??? You’ve gotta talk to your kids and find common ground. Even when my kids were tiny, I always made sure to ask them what they were thinking and what they wanted; I'd give them my take and my conclusions on the situation too. As the parent, I definitely had the final say, but I always made sure to listen to their input first. Some people would be shocked at how maturely little kids can think, or how much more grown-up they feel when they realize they have a voice and that someone actually cares about what they have to say. As they grow up, they'll keep talking to you, and they won't feel the need to hide what's happening in their lives—they'll even tell you about the messes they make because they know you'll listen, even if you still have to give them a lecture, because at the end of the day, COMMUNICATION is everything.
And trust me, I know what I'm talking about. I'm 38, married to a guy who basically stays out of everything, and I've got two boys who are nearly grown. I've raised two almost-adult humans from the ground up. One is 17 and the other is 15 and a half. They turned out to be great, well-adjusted people—not because of being hit, but because of respect, real conversations, making deals, and actually LISTENING to what they had to say.
I hope nobody minds me crashing this thread like this! It was totally random, but after reading through this, I felt like I absolutely had to speak up.
Please, don't just "train" your kids—actually live life with them and enjoy who they are!😉🙂😘
And trust me, I know what I'm talking about. I'm 38, married to a guy who basically stays out of everything, and I've got two boys who are nearly grown. I've raised two almost-adult humans from the ground up. One is 17 and the other is 15 and a half. They turned out to be great, well-adjusted people—not because of being hit, but because of respect, real conversations, making deals, and actually LISTENING to what they had to say.
I hope nobody minds me crashing this thread like this! It was totally random, but after reading through this, I felt like I absolutely had to speak up.
Please, don't just "train" your kids—actually live life with them and enjoy who they are!😉🙂😘