5 posts shown.
You’re basically putting yourself in a cage, and honestly, that’s just bad—really bad.
I guess I’ve always been wired this way too, just constantly picking myself apart, thinking everyone else has it figured out while I’m falling short. But I can see where that path leads, and it's just standing still; my head is overflowing with goals and half-baked ideas, yet nothing ever actually happens. For the longest time, I was just waiting for some hero to show up, grab me by the arm, and say, "Hey, let's get moving, we'll do this together," but you know what? That person never showed. I was lucky enough to eventually realize that life doesn't work that way, so now I'm trying to fix it. Of course, for people like us, it’s a hell of a lot harder to break through than it is for those born fighters, but I suppose it's still easier than just sitting there crying about how unfair everything is. Look, we could sit here and hand you all the secrets of the universe on a silver platter, but none of that matters if you think reading a few words is enough to make things happen while you wait for a miracle to drop from the sky. Nobody is telling you this is going to be easy, but it’s probably easier than you’re making it out to be. Just move. Do something, anything at all. You can't control the stuff that’s pure chance—you know, like a freak accident or a sudden death—but beyond those things, you actually have some say in your own life. If we set aside the random chaos of existence, I guess everyone is ultimately the architect of their own fate.
Harold Gray97 said:Hello, everyone!
Let’s lighten the mood for a moment.
I have a little joke for you.
The police brought three women in for questioning. They ask the first:
"Are you a prostitute?"
"No, I'm a model."
They ask the second:
"Are you a prostitute?"
"No, I'm a model."
They ask the third:
"And you? Are you also a model?"
"No, I'm a prostitute."
"So, is business good?"
"It would be, if it weren't for all these models..."
Now, I find myself pondering what career path I should take. Which one is more lucrative?
Ladies, please, I could use some advice. Hmm, perhaps a modeling career is the way to go after all.😂
Well, look, that counts as a business too, I suppose... You can't really know until you dive in, and who knows, maybe you'll find your calling there.🤣
Jeremy Roberts5 said:I don't know, maybe I can just put it this way: we’re all just different people living in different cities, leading completely different lives... Personally, I don't have anyone in the real world. About 90% of my existence happens online, and honestly, I'm exhausted by it. If I could change one thing, I'd actually want to see and hear the people I talk to (and no, I don't mean over Zoom). My only connection is my family, but I can't stand them because they've proven to me a million times over—through both their words and their actions—that they simply don't care about me, and that's never going to change. I've started calling them my "internet friends," because I don't really know how else to describe them. That's all they've ever been to me, since I've never actually seen or heard any of them in person.
Look, it seems pretty obvious to me that you're just completely fed up with the endless typing, the instant messaging, the Zoom calls, and all these other technological gimmicks; you just want to grab a coffee with someone, go for a walk, and experience something "real." But I guess the question is, are you sure you actually want the social interaction itself, or are you just trying to convince yourself that there's an actual human being on the other end of the screen rather than just some figment of your imagination? I ask because I've been there myself; people would push to meet up in person, we'd do it, and then we'd just go back to messaging and maybe see each other once or twice a year at most. You might think that one "real" conversation in the physical world would be infinitely more helpful than some online chat, but I suppose it doesn't necessarily work out that way. Like I told you before, writing can be quite wonderful in these situations, so if you're truly done with virtual acquaintances, maybe just keep writing here.🙂
Matthew Castillo5 said:I actually have pretty positive experiences with most of my "online friends." There are several I’ve never met face-to-face—folks from North Mexico, Mexico, and Germany—who were actually there for me when none of my "real-life" friends or even my own family realized I was struggling and needed help.
I’ve been there too, honestly. There really are wonderful souls out there, and in those heavy moments, an email from a stranger can probably mean more than a million hugs from someone standing right next to you who hasn't a clue what you're going through. You just have to give people a chance, I suppose—though obviously, not everyone deserves one, but that’s just how the world works...
Jeremy Roberts5 said:I'm aware of all that, I'm just exhausted... nothing ever goes right, no matter how hard I try... I've given up on trying to meet girls online (because it's always the same story: either they ghost me for no reason I can figure out, or they don't like me, or we hit it off but live 200+ miles apart and it still leads nowhere 😢).
I wasn't necessarily talking about finding a girlfriend or starting a romance, but more about friendship, I guess. Like I mentioned before, it’s incredibly important that you don't feel isolated in all this, and you admitted yourself that you have this intense need to talk to someone, to open up, which is usually easiest when it's with a stranger—someone who doesn't know your history yet. For most people, it's easier to be vulnerable with a stranger because you aren't weighed down by what they already think of you or everything they already know about your life. I know it happens all the time where you meet someone great online who lives halfway across the country, but that isn't really the issue since support is support, whether you're talking via email or sitting face-to-face. My best friend lives hundreds of miles away, yet he's my biggest support system and one of the most vital people in my life. In times like these, I suppose one can actually be grateful for the internet. Besides, I don't know about you, but I personally find it much easier to communicate through email than in person; it’s just simpler to express certain thoughts that way. The main thing is just getting it out of your system. Write to someone, keep a journal, start a blog, whatever—just write, every day, ten times a day if you have to, just vent, because it might make things feel a little lighter, at least for a moment.
First off, I honestly find it hard to believe there are people actually blaming you for this, let alone people constantly rubbing it in your face 🙂 Human stupidity really is just... infinite, I guess 🤦
It’s obvious this is eating you alive, and I can certainly understand why you feel this desperate need to punish yourself; I know a million of us could jump in here and tell you that you aren't actually at fault and that punishing yourself is pointless, that you just need to move on with your life and all that, but maybe that won't be enough to actually get you moving, at least not permanently. I suppose the cards just fell in such a way that this happened at the worst possible moment, making it incredibly difficult for you to find people to connect with or anyone who could actually help you out. On top of all that, you didn't have any support from your family, which I think is really the crux of the whole issue. I imagine things might be even a tiny bit easier right now, and you might actually be able to break out of this stalemate, if they had been standing by you. But they weren't. So, what now? Just sit there and cry because life treated you like garbage? Come on, think about it, it doesn't really make sense, does it? What is that actually going to achieve? Things can just keep getting worse every single day. And what happens if you dig deep, find that last shred of strength, and actually try to move forward? You might just feel better. Nobody can guarantee that you will, obviously, but you won't know unless you try. Of course, you can't do this alone. Even the biggest optimist would need some kind of help to crawl out of a hole like this, much less someone like you who seems to be their own worst enemy. Because of that, I guess your first step has to be finding someone you can finally open up to, someone you can actually bond with and let them truly see who you are. Once you manage to pull that off, everything we're talking about here will feel a whole lot easier. I realize it isn't easy to find someone like that, especially if you're from a small town or somewhere isolated, but it isn't impossible. You could try looking here. There are more lonely people on this forum than you probably realize, and maybe there's someone out there waiting specifically for you—you never really know what tomorrow might bring 😉