Posts by rowdyviper722

silentmaker17 said:I’m looking for some advice here. Any and all feedback is more than welcome!

Basically, I suspect I might be dealing with OCD. It doesn't look like the textbook version most people think of—you know, those physical rituals where you have to wash your hands ten times or double-check if the stove is off just to stop the anxiety. For me, it's almost entirely "in my head." It's more about mental fixations...

For instance, I find myself constantly re-analyzing specific events or certain people over and over again. It's like I'm somehow addicted to these negative emotions, which is absolutely exhausting, not to mention how much it trashes my self-esteem 👎 . On top of that, depression has started creeping in, so things are definitely not okay. When these thoughts hit, I try not to completely suppress them because I know that just makes them explode even harder later... instead, I try to "filter" them, basically telling myself, "Okay, this is just an OCD thought, don't let it get to you."

But the real issue is that during stressful times or when life gets heavy, these thoughts come flooding in like a damn tidal wave and they just won't stop. Between the depression and my shattered confidence, I honestly feel like I'm falling apart inside 👎 . There are periods where I think I'm finally getting better—that it was just a temporary rough patch—but then reality hits and I realize this is something much deeper. I need to change. It’s long overdue, because this self-destructive cycle isn't going anywhere good.

Final exams are coming up, and I know I should be studying, but I just can't. I have zero energy. I start, I stall, I spiral into self-pity, and it just repeats in a loop. I honestly don't know what the next step is... thanks for listening.

Hey there. Aside from the classic OCD involving visible obsessions and compulsions, there’s this thing called "Pure O," where you don't see any outward ritualistic behaviors. I happened to run into this specific flavor of OCD myself 🙂...and let me tell you, it can get incredibly nasty.

Look, I'm not exactly an expert here, but speaking from experience, I think the most important thing you can do is educate yourself as much as possible. You need to wrap your head around what's actually happening and find a solid support group—somewhere you can vent and know that the people listening actually get it because they're walking the same path. This forum is fine, but there are specialized sites out there too. Personally, I found www.stuckinadoorway.org to be a lifesaver.
On that site, you can really see the massive spectrum of OCD subtypes people deal with, even if it all eventually boils down to the same core issue.
If you want more info, check out www.ocdonline.com as well; it's an excellent site run by a doctor who clearly knows their stuff when it comes to OCD.

I’ve been dealing with superstitious nonsense since elementary school. Eventually, I outgrew it because it just stopped making sense, but then other stuff started creeping in to take its place.

Frank Cooper3, honestly, I really hope that if this depression started for you, it’s just a phase that passes. For some people, it's a lifelong battle; for others, it hits once and stays away, or it just rolls in and out in waves.

So, how is everyone else handling treatment?
I’ve never seen a psychiatrist, and I have zero interest in taking medication. People say behavioral therapy is the way to go, but over the years, I’ve basically taught myself how to manage—learning to spot my OCD triggers and just ignoring them. That said, some days are absolute nightmares. It’s a constant up and down.

Frank Cooper3 said:I've read somewhere that OCD (especially intrusive thoughts) often pops up during depressive episodes, mostly because of serotonin levels...

That’s probably a fair point. Honestly, though, I’ve never really dealt with depression myself. Everything about this stuff is so incredibly layered and messy that there's rarely just one simple answer.

Rebecca Moore said:Man, this is a solid point.😬

Look, I deal with OCD too. Honestly, I’m pretty inhibited—I’m 24 and haven't even had a girlfriend yet. I just can't shake these damn inhibitions... I don't have the guts to actually talk to a girl, even though I want a relationship more than anything.

I've been rejected a few times, and now I've built up this mental image that I'm just not good enough to have a girlfriend, like I don't deserve it or something... I used to go through phases of cleaning and hand-washing, but over time, that evolved into something else entirely.

OCD shifts over time. For example, someone who started out obsessively washing their hands might later move on to compulsive gambling, spending all day in chat rooms, or hanging out on forums like this one.

Hey, Rebecca Moore.

You aren't alone. It's the exact same story with me, except I didn't have as much trouble with the hand-washing stuff. Instead, I had plenty of other "lovely" issues.
Things change. From what I've experienced, OCD isn't a static thing. It evolves right along with the person living with it. Maybe you'll eventually gain some confidence with women, but then you'll get hit by some totally different symptom you didn't even know existed.

Basically, the longer I've dealt with this piece of crap, the better I get at fighting it.

Also, people here constantly bring up this idea that someone with OCD has dark, repressed things buried in their subconscious that cause these conflicts. That might be a total myth. There's research showing that OCD is linked to chemical imbalances in the brain (like serotonin), which means it's actually more similar to a physical disorder. Your brain is basically just glitching out.

Either way,
best,

In case anyone's looking for it, there’s this solid forum dedicated entirely to OCD
http://www.stuckinadoorway.co.uk

It’s a great spot to dig up some actual useful info and get a real sense of what everyone else is dealing with. Might even help someone out if they’re hitting a breaking point.

I’m one of those freaks myself, for the record.
🙂