Posts by rowdyheron80

Casey Cruz4 said:So, how long have you guys been seeing each other?

About 6 months now...

rapidtinker2 said:Then he’s just not the one for you. 🙂 I mean, if things actually start getting serious, he’s going to have to find out eventually, right? If you get the feeling he’ll handle it well, then he probably will—and honestly, you'll save yourself a massive amount of heartache and stress by being with someone like that. 🙂😘

I have to admit, it would be pretty amazing to finally feel a bit more liberated and less wound up 🙂

Sophia Parker78 said:Either way, you should probably just be upfront with him about how you're feeling. Honestly, you might be surprised by how many people aren't actually judgmental—it turns out half the stuff we obsess over thinking is a huge deal isn't even an issue to anyone else.🙂
Everyone cares what others think, no matter how much people talk trash, but trust me, everyone has had those moments where they felt totally mortified. Once you find someone who truly cares about you, none of that matters.

That’s a fair point. I guess I'm just so worked up about it right now that I haven't stopped to consider that other people might be more chill and less judgmental than I'm giving them credit for. But when you've kept everything bottled up and never said a word out loud, it's hard to see it any other way.🤷

John Newman94 said:See, rowdyheron80—it’s not all bad news after all. I'm heading off the forums now... goodnight to you and all the ladies here who always manage to lift my spirits!

Goodnight to you too, and thanks for being so kind. 😍

Carol Long87 said:look... I honestly feel like when you're dealing with something massive—something that’s actually eating at you—it’s better to just open up to your partner. Not even because you want them to pity you, but just so you aren't walking around with this constant, low-grade dread in the back of your mind that everything will fall apart if they find out. Doesn't that weight get to be too much?

plus, eventually, they’re going to notice anyway, right?

It weighs on me—absolutely does! And yeah, they'll find out, which is exactly why I’m dreading the summer😢—but it isn't just about him. It's about everyone else, too. I’ve had people make those comments before, you know? Like, "Oh my god, look at your arms" or "Wow, you've got some serious hair there"—people saying it like it's some little joke, but...

rapidtinker2 said:If you only knew the sheer weight that would lift off my shoulders. 🙂 I think you know deep down he’d take it well—honestly, any sane person would at this point. 🙂

Probably, yeah... knowing him, he might not react exactly how I’m picturing it in my head—but you know how it goes, right? That nagging little "what if?" always hangs there. 🤷

Carol Long87 said:Honestly, why give a damn about what everyone else thinks? You should only really care about the people close to you. Most people probably aren't even noticing anything anyway.

Just tell him. He’ll likely take it fine, and honestly, you'll feel a million times better knowing someone you actually love accepts you exactly as you are. I think you might be underestimating how much strength you can draw from his support.

I guess I'm just one of those people—what my inner circle thinks matters a lot to me.🤷
But how do you even start a conversation like that? Like, "Hey babe, I'm a little more high-maintenance than you realize?" 😕

🙂

Amy Long said:I’m dealing with the exact same stuff... though nobody ever actually gave me a straight answer about what was going on. 🤷 Dealing with excessive hair was a nightmare for years—to this day, I still feel self-conscious about hitting the beach. 😢 Plus, weight has always been an uphill battle for me, and honestly, it runs in the family—nobody in my clan has ever weighed under 220 pounds, and I’m sitting here well over 285. It doesn't bother me as much anymore, though, because I have a partner who loves me just the way I am. Like, if a guy can't handle me like this, then he's not the one, right? Simple as that. Still, school was a total disaster. People were relentless, picking on everything, and I’m still carrying some of that baggage today. I just really hope my Sandy doesn't have to deal with any of this nonsense growing up (on her dad's side, everyone is super thin, but they've all got that darker complexion).

🙂

Are you still struggling with those things? I suspect Sandy might run into the same issues, but at least you can get ahead of it and help her early on!

rowdyheron80 said:😁 maybe one day I'll look at things that way too—maybe more time needs to pass before I can just let the sunlight in completely 🙂 it’s actually really nice to hear that people don't hold onto prejudices against those who are different.

rapidtinker2 said:rowdyheron80 🙂

I know it's tough, but you might be pleasantly surprised if you just laid everything out for your boyfriend—you might find he accepts it totally normally, without any judgment at all. 🙂 Nobody's perfect; we all have our flaws, our little quirks or anomalies, some just more obvious than others. From what I can tell, you've got your health situation under control, but you're putting even more of a mental burden on yourself than you probably need to. 😘

Oh man, I honestly can't imagine actually saying that to him... I mean, I know he’d probably take it really well, but just... saying it out loud? 😲

Oh, I don't think so—honestly, I'm pretty certain he never caught on to a single thing. I made sure of that every step of the way...

Seriously? I’ve always just assumed this wasn't really a widespread thing among women... I mean, I basically used my own experience as the benchmark, mostly because I’ve never actually run into anyone else dealing with it.

😁 maybe one day I’ll find myself looking at things that way too—I guess I just need a little more time to pass before I'm ready to fully step out into the light and let the sun in 🙂 it’s actually really nice to hear that people aren't so quick to judge those who are different.

Thanks, Lisa Allen19 🙂 :*

Thanks so much, John Newman94... you're absolutely right, and I know that deep down—but man, you’ve gotta understand, there's just this massive, underlying fear of everything that might be headed our way.

Look, I totally get where you're coming from, but honestly, this stuff hits us hard—those of us actually living through it. I see how you're looking at it, but just imagine skipping out on a beach trip for years because you can't even squeeze into a bikini, or having to deal with a massive breakout and waiting a full week just for your skin to stop being raw. It’s easy to brush it off and say it isn't a huge deal, but for people like us—if there are even many of us left—it really is. My boyfriend hasn't even realized the extent of it yet, mostly because we tend to do things my way—so, I’ve never been fully "bikini ready" around him, and we’ve never just laid out in the direct sun or anything like that... I'm honestly terrified he'll eventually notice and have a bad reaction to it. 😢

So, I’ve been chewing on the whole idea of getting a laser, Lisa Allen19, but let’s be real—you need a massive pile of cash for something like that. And since I’m out here footing the entire bill for my tuition and my apartment by myself, things are looking pretty tight right now... It feels kind of gross, doesn't it? Like, isn't it just plain unfair? I mean, you wouldn't judge someone for being in this position, would you?

I guess I just have to be—it’s always weighing on me, this constant fear that if someone doesn't quite get what's going on with me, they'll just... walk away. There isn't a cure, you know? It's just a genetic anomaly I was born with. I could take birth control to try and stack on some female hormones, but honestly, the excess testosterone I've already got would probably just win the fight anyway 😢

Hey there, my new fellow forum members. I’m not sure if you’ve stumbled upon this thread before, but this is just my everyday reality—it's a bit heavy, I know—and I really wanted to introduce myself and see what you all have to say about it.
Basically, both of my sisters and I inherited a genetic condition called hirsutism. I figured most of you might not be super familiar with it, so here’s the quick rundown: it’s an excess of male hormones like androgens and testosterone in the female body, which causes physical changes like excessive hair growth and a more masculine body shape.
Thank God that even though my sisters are only a year or two younger than me, they don't deal with it nearly as intensely as I do—and I honestly pray they never have to... It’s hard, though. I find myself feeling self-conscious, sad, and frustrated quite often because it's something I have to face every single day. 😢 😢 My face is covered in dark hair, except for my forehead, nose, and the area right under my eyes. Of course, I stay on top of it constantly—plucking or whatever as soon as things start peeking through—but that ends up being pretty rough on my skin.
I haven't really gone out into direct sunlight for years now, because that's when everything becomes way too noticeable. The hair is also really prominent on my stomach, a bit less on my chest, and much heavier in my intimate areas. Sure, you can manage some of it, but you can never truly get rid of it all, and the results never last long... Plus, I have a bit of a protruding stomach due to some ovarian issues that cause bloating. People tell me I'm actually very pretty—I've got long black hair and big blue eyes, and I'm fairly tall and average weight, just like any other girl—but I won't go to the beach or wear short sleeves unless I've just done a bleaching treatment on my arms (which takes a week anyway), and I won't wear shorts or tie my hair up in the sun... 🤦 I've been seeing my boyfriend for six months now and he hasn't noticed a thing, just like everyone else besides my family. Sometimes, I feel like a total monster... 🤦
I'm curious to know what you guys think. How would you react if you were dating a girl dealing with these kinds of issues? Thanks so much in advance...