I’ve been thinking a lot about how much of success in high-stakes environments is actually just psychological warfare. It’s easy to focus on the physical grind—the training, the reps, the sheer stamina—but lately, it feels like the real difference makers are the ones who can master their own headspace.
I tried this thing a few months ago where I tried to emulate the focus of certain legendary golfers I follow. I thought if I could just mimic that "locked-in" stillness during my high-pressure work presentations, I'd be unstoppable. It didn't work immediately, of course. I just ended up looking like I’d forgotten my lines. But I do think there's something to be said for finding a non-sporting archetype to model your discipline after.
It’s interesting how we look to people in completely different arenas to find a blueprint for our own grit. Do you guys have a specific person—maybe an athlete, an artist, or even a historical figure—whose mental approach you try to copy when things get intense?
I’ve spent quite a bit of time lurking on this thread without actually posting, just following along with all of you and finding so much strength and empathy in your words. We have so much in common—so many of the same experiences, the same shared struggles, and the same deep pain. Sadly, my dad passed away forever on September 28, 2014, just 100 days after his liver cancer diagnosis. We tried everything we possibly could, and I am so grateful to all of you because following your stories and advice helped us through such a difficult fight... I thank God that my dad's final moments were peaceful and dignified, as he passed away in his sleep without any pain, surrounded by those who loved him most. We just have to keep moving forward, one step at a time, one day at a time, for our own sake and for our families. Who knows what other challenges life has in store for us? I truly wish peace, strength, and all the love in the world to everyone here seeking help for their loved ones battling this cruel disease, because that is the greatest gift you can offer them in their final moments...
Honey, please accept my deepest condolences. I am so incredibly sorry. My mom passed away forever on September 26th, and despite trying absolutely everything, there was nothing more we could do. I know exactly how you feel, and while I wish I could help, I can't even find the way to help myself right now. I keep telling myself I did everything I could, but honestly, that doesn't bring much comfort at the moment. Hang in there. There isn't much else to say. I just hope things get easier for us over time, though for me, it seems to get harder as the days go by.
Hey everyone, I was wondering how you all deal with losing someone close to you? How do you manage to function normally or just find a way to keep moving forward? I feel completely stuck right now, and I honestly don't know how to handle this loss—this indescribable pain, this overwhelming sadness, and this heavy pressure around my heart. I really don't know how to get through a single day, how to sleep, or how to find any sense of positivity... Please, if anyone has some advice, because right now I just can't see anything bright enough to hold onto so I can pull myself up again...
To my dear online friends, thank you all so much for everything you've done for me during this incredibly difficult season. We laid Mom to rest yesterday. Now, all that's left is the silence of the walls, an empty house, a profound emptiness, and a grief so deep it's hard to put into words—just looking at her bed and catching her scent leaves such a void, knowing she's truly gone. I managed to make it through yesterday, but honestly, I have no idea how I'm going to navigate what comes next. With both Mom and Dad gone now, the world feels very different. Thank you all once again, and I wish every one of you nothing but the very best.
I spent some time lying in bed today, and when I finally got up, I wandered into her room hoping to find her tucked away under the covers, just so I could sit in the chair beside her with a cup of coffee and watch her sleep. But she isn't there. She isn't sleeping, and she isn't resting. The bed is empty. The candle is burning, but coffee just doesn't feel like coffee without her here. It’s so quiet, and she isn't calling out to me. I miss her so much. Thank you all, and I wish everyone nothing but the very best.
Here I am, just watching Mom take her final breaths. Her pupils have dilated, she isn't responding to anything, and her breathing is so shallow... she's passing away.
Angela Wright said:😢 I feel so incredibly sorry for you, dear... I truly hope you find peace in your heart, and that she finds her own eternal peace and rest. 🙂
I really hope that after everything is said and done, I’ll be able to find some peace; I think I'll feel a little better knowing that when I finally come to myself, I can look back and say I truly gave it my absolute all. Thank you so much for everything—for the talks, the support, the explanations, and for being so patient with both me and my mom.
I'm right there with you; I'm honestly so curious about that part too. My mom had doctors and home health nurses visit, and they tried everything to check her blood pressure and pulse, but they just couldn't get anything. They were checking her wrists and neck, searching for any sign of a heartbeat, but it was just too weak to detect. They eventually told me it was happening and that I should prepare myself because time was running out. Now my mom is gone, moving on to a better place—a world without pain—leaving us behind. God, it's just so hard; I always thought I was strong, but I guess I'm not. I just can't handle this. I'm really not doing okay.
Good morning... here we are after a completely sleepless night. Mom is still coughing and vomiting, and she's struggling to catch her breath. I tried to change her diaper and refresh the gauze on her wound just now, but the second I moved her even a tiny bit, she started choking, vomiting green, and having such a hard time breathing...
I took some photos of her legs yesterday to show my sister... I was wondering if this is what Angela Wright's grandmother went through? The quality isn't great, but you can see it clearly...
I’m honestly feeling pretty scared right now. Mom has been having these shortness of breath episodes since this morning that last a minute or two, and the coughing is just brutal—she’s turning pale and yellowish. It feels like such an agonizing struggle to watch. I feel so terribly for your friend; I don't really know what to say other than that I'm terrified, because I am truly frightened of this disease.
My mom has blue feet and ankles near her knees... that area feels so cold to the touch... she just had another choking episode, and she's been vomiting and coughing heavily since this morning, though she doesn't even have the strength to cough properly... When she does cough or vomit, she has to yawn really deeply... why is that happening?
Good morning! We're facing another little hurdle here; Mom's feet have gone completely numb, and she's feeling incredibly cold. She currently has three layers on, but even with two blankets tucked around her, she just can't seem to get warm enough.
Angela Wright said:Don't dwell on that right now...😢 We all carry these things within us and everyone has a chance of getting sick. Genetic predisposition plays a role more or less, but triggers can be something else entirely... it doesn't always have to happen.
I'm not sure if you all are people of faith, but if you are, perhaps consider having the Anointing of the Sick if you haven't already... it meant so much to my mom, and she passed away so peacefully.
Our priest was there, and she did receive the Anointing of the Sick.
I can't help but wonder what all this agony and suffering is actually for! I just don't see any logical reason behind it. My mom was completely devastated by it, and honestly, I feel totally destroyed too. What else is there? And what happens when I face a cancer diagnosis in a few years... since I basically have a 99% genetic predisposition given how I live my life. I'm practically the ideal candidate.
I know this is it. I’m just so tired of watching everything unfold, constantly swinging between feeling angry and feeling heartbroken. Honestly, I'm just exhausted.
Good morning, everyone... how are you all doing today? It’s such a gloomy morning here, which has left me feeling a bit down and sleep-deprived too. Mom was coughing through the entire night, and her thighs and stomach are bothering her again; plus, we're dealing with those issues with her bowel movements, almost as if she couldn't process that 5 ml nutritional drink. She’s also developed this specific scent that I'm finding a bit difficult to deal with. I hope you all have a wonderful and peaceful day.
Richard Sanders7 said:hollowridge88, hang in there! 🙂 🙂
Thanks... oh, Mom just mentioned she actually wants some hot dogs after two weeks of refusing them, so I'm cooking them up now, and we'll see if this was just another little lapse in memory or if she'll actually eat them...