Missing periods: What's your experience?
in Women's Health ·
Sandra Turner71 said:Hi! I'm new to this forum, and honestly, I created this account just because of my own situation—I feel like I'm at a total loss. I haven't scrolled through all the other posts yet because I really don't have the time to dig through 200 pages to find what I need, so please forgive me... though I suspect no one else here is dealing with my exact circumstances. To get straight to the point... I noticed there are doctors on here giving advice, so I am sincerely hoping they might be able to help me. Here’s the deal:
I'm 21 years old, 5'4", and weigh about 107 lbs...I have never had my period. 😢 At first, I just assumed it would happen later, but the delay kept stretching out and I didn't go to the doctor. I know you'll probably scold me for waiting so long, but what can I say? I grew up without a mom, and it was just really hard for me to talk to anyone about this. Earlier this year, I finally saw a gynecologist for an exam. I should have mentioned that I'm a virgin (maybe mostly because of this issue, which makes me anxious about intimacy... and I'd actually love to know if it's even okay for me to have sex)... anyway, the gynecologist couldn't do much. She said everything looked fine externally and thought she saw my uterus and ovaries on the ultrasound, but she wasn't certain since I showed up unprepared (I hadn't been drinking enough water) because nobody told me to. In any case, I was referred to an endocrinologist who didn't really do anything besides run $67 to tell me the exact same thing the first doctor did.
I'm terrified because I know there are so many possibilities—diseases, even cancer... or that I might end up being infertile... or even that part of me is male 😕 due to some kind of hormonal imbalance... My hair growth is normal; I'm not more hairy than anyone else, quite the opposite, actually. My underarm and pubic hair is totally standard, and my arms aren't hairy at all, just those tiny white hairs you can barely see. I don't have facial hair either. But I did notice this year that my hair is thinning significantly, and I have no idea why... PLEASE, IF ANYONE CAN HELP ME! This is incredibly frustrating and I can't find any peace. Also, I don't have health insurance (and I can't exactly get it, please don't ask why... it's a sad story)... I'm at my wit's end. I'm currently a college student, and with my course load, I can't just spend all day running to various clinics... I can't be dragging myself from office to office when I have mandatory lectures to attend. I'm torn because I know my health should come first, but I'm not in a financial position to choose between my studies and medical care. I'm scared and I just want to know exactly what I need to do to figure out what's happening. I know the condition is called primary amenorrhea, but I have no idea what the actual cause is for me 😢. My biggest fears are still life-threatening illnesses and the idea that I might somehow be male 😕😕😕 PLEASE HELP ME!
Dear,
reading your story, I felt like I was reliving my own experience. I'm seven years older than you, and back then—due to school commitments (though looking back, I regret prioritizing that over my health) and sheer fear—I neglected my own wellbeing. I was also diagnosed with primary amenorrhea. My thyroid is fine, and my pituitary gland is too, thank Bog, but the diagnosis was premature ovarian failure. Which means I'm in early menopause. I carry a lot of pain inside because there's a high chance I won't be able to have children, at least not naturally. But, I'm not giving up!
My OB-GYN put me on Trisequens to regulate my cycle—basically, if I don't take the pills, my period just doesn't happen. 😢 Honestly, I’m right there with you in feeling totally confused by this whole situation, especially since the doctors just handed us a diagnosis and called it a day without much explanation! If I were you, I’d insist on getting a full hormone panel done (your doctor can suggest which ones to check), see an endocrinologist, and maybe even get an MRI of the pituitary gland just to be safe.
Best of luck!!!!
I’d really love to stay in touch—it feels like we might be dealing with the exact same thing.