Posts by fadedlynx96

Larry Lewis said:Yes, that’s exactly what I meant when I used the word "healing"—though, looking back, maybe that was an optimistic choice of words. I decided to cut my dosage in half just to see what would happen—purely out of curiosity, I suppose—and by the fourth or fifth day, things had already gone south. It wasn't even about whether I was actually taking the pills or not; it was more about the temperament... I didn't find myself cursing at the walls or losing my cool like I usually do during those few days, but let me tell you, it certainly wasn't "better."🙂
So, there you have it—the brain is broken, and that’s just the cold, hard reality of the situation. It’s all very simple, really, if you can stomach the simplicity of it—though I suspect most people find the whole thing far too complex to actually face. One's mind malfunctions, the gears grind to a halt, and suddenly you're left staring at the wreckage of your own cognitive processes. It’s a grim business, isn't it? Just... that's it. End of story.😢

I maintain my position that I am fully recovered, a fact that aligns perfectly with the current official psychiatric consensus in America.

After I finally stopped taking my last antipsychotic, Rexulti, I went a full decade without any medication at all. It wasn't an issue, and I met every single requirement to be considered fully recovered.
When I finally sat down with a psychiatrist after ten years of being off medication, it wasn't actually because of schizophrenia or psychosis; it was the OCD that drove me to psychotherapy. After about two or three years of that, a different doctor diagnosed me with Bipolar and switched my treatment from the initial prescriptions to Lithium.
There is a theoretical possibility that I have been living with Bipolar disorder all along and that my bouts of psychosis were simply an inherent part of it, yet no psychiatrist practicing today seems willing to acknowledge or even entertain that notion. According to official medical consensus, too much time has elapsed between individual episodes for them to be considered connected.
I also know that they used my case for years at Mayo Clinic, where I spent most of my time, to give lectures—naturally without mentioning my name—and to explain how this condition can actually be cured, given that Mayo Clinic is the primary teaching hospital for the Medical School and the place where every psychiatry resident completes their training.
It isn’t strictly true that once you start on antipsychotics, you are condemned to take them for the rest of your life. I went through just about every medication available twenty years ago, yet after I finally stopped everything, I remained perfectly fine. Lithium isn't an antipsychotic either, and it actually offers some neuroprotective benefits, much like how calcium supports bone density.
I find it impossible to wrap my head around this particular line of reasoning that suggests medication essentially functions as a tool for brain destruction.
I lost a year at university, but I still managed to breeze through my final two years as the top student in my class, earning the Dean's Award.
Then he moved to the other side of the world to start over, chasing a life that most people—not just Americans, but any self-proclaimed "normal" person—would trade everything they own just to experience.
And all of this happens despite having brain damage.

Chloe Lewis4 said:How can you not know if you had schizophrenia? Were you experiencing auditory or visual hallucinations and those types of symptoms back then?http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publi...ophrenia.shtml?
On another note, I'm seeing a girl with Bipolar disorder. How should I handle this? She seems pretty promiscuous.

I am no doctor, so I cannot say for certain whether it was schizophrenia or something else entirely. A whole string of doctors from various hospitals couldn't reach a consensus on the diagnosis—whether it was schizophrenia or just psychosis, and which specific subtype fell under which category. You don't establish a diagnosis using textbooks, the internet, or those kinds of questionnaires. Not everyone can do that unless they are a physician, and even then, doctors often struggle with it.
Furthermore, I never once experienced auditory hallucinations. No one was whispering instructions to me or predicting the future. However, none of that mattered to the doctors; they were convinced it was schizophrenia regardless.
I did have visual hallucinations, though that wasn't the primary issue. The core problem was the delusions—that state where you believe something is true despite there being zero evidence, such as my belief that people were trying to kill me in a gruesome way, specifically by crucifying me like Jesus. In that moment, I transitioned from being just "crazy" to being "dangerous," necessitating an immediate emergency hospitalization so I wouldn't attack a stranger on the street.
Later on, I dealt with a series of other delusions that felt perfectly rational to me, supported by what seemed like overwhelming evidence. Of course, none of it was real.
The delusions subsided after about two months, which served as the main indicator that I was improving and might be released soon; they let me out in less than three weeks.
Delusions are a common symptom in both schizophrenia and psychosis. Some psychiatrists will diagnose psychosis first and adjust later, while others lead with schizophrenia and pivot if necessary. At least, that’s how it worked about twenty years ago.
Regarding the girl with Bipolar, just try it and see where things go. People don't usually call it "promiscuity"; it's more like hypersexuality, which is a known symptom of both Bipolar and schizophrenia if memory serves. Personally, I stopped counting the women I slept with a long time ago, yet I also had three serious partners, including my ex-wife, whom I never cheated on. My ex-wife and I were together for fifteen years, which is longer than many "normal" people spend in their entire lives. We have two great kids, and everything was fine.
Bipolar manifests differently in everyone; I, for instance, am quite stable. I have no idea what her specific situation is. My own experiences with women from the psychiatric ward were mostly negative. They were always easy to talk to and hang out with because they were the only ones willing to grab a drink with me, but I never managed to sustain any kind of relationship, even something casual, with them—and I'm talking about women who had recently been hospitalized.
If she is doing well—meaning she stays on her medication and isn't constantly being admitted to the hospital—then why not? A relationship can work just fine. If it weighs on you, you can ask her about her diagnosis or any struggles she wants to share. If you are serious about her, it is better to ask upfront so you know what you are getting into.
If you are only looking for sex, it is probably better to steer clear. Even if she is sexually active with many people, you could end up hurting her deeply when you leave. Honestly, before you dive into anything serious, find out what her condition entails and whether you are actually equipped to handle it.

Chloe Lewis4 As if anyone actually believes that.
It’s entirely possible that this refers to the early stages of schizophrenia, where the symptoms remain almost imperceptible. 🤷

That 25% figure specifically refers to the initial psychotic episode or an initial schizophrenia diagnosis, because once you hit that second one, there isn't much left to be done.

I suspect most young patients back then didn't give a damn about an schizophrenia diagnosis because we all lived under the delusion that a cure was just around the corner—though, looking back, we clearly weren't in our right minds.

I honestly felt like having schizophrenia or psychosis would have been preferable to living with Bipolar disorder, since for some reason, Bipolar is always framed as this uniquely horrific, incurable affliction.

In the end, I walked away with all three diagnoses, yet everything turned out significantly better than I ever could have anticipated or even dared to hope for.

ruggedtinker9 said:I have heard quite a few accounts from others suggesting that some people enter spontaneous remission following an schizophrenia diagnosis, and I suppose there might be a roughly 25% chance of achieving a full recovery. However, there remains a significant possibility that psychosis could become a chronic condition... Still, I believe there are instances where individuals do recover, even if that percentage isn't particularly high.

A 25% chance of a complete cure for schizophrenia or psychosis would be an astronomical figure.

If that were the reality for other conditions like diabetes, heart disease, or cancer, everyone would be satisfied and the entire hospital industry would collapse overnight.

Noah Garcia4 said:How am I supposed to play the nice guy here? Lithium is an incredibly heavy-duty medication. We're talking about serious, intense chemistry.
Larry Lewis and I were essentially trying to point out that there’s virtually no chance someone who has experienced psychosis and been prescribed antipsychotics will just magically walk away from them for good and live a perfectly normal life. That would be what you call a total cure.
I’m not sure if that makes sense to you now. I think that’s exactly what Larry Lewis meant when he used the term "cured."

No offense intended, but compared to antipsychotics, lithium is nothing more than a minor supplement; it’s practically on par with taking magnesium, iron, or Vitamin C. It isn't some complex chemical miracle engineered specifically for psychosis or Bipolar.
In my case, they didn't prescribe it to replace my antipsychotics, but rather as something entirely separate, and if I don't want it, I can just stop.
Beyond that, after I was discharged from the hospital, I didn't take anything for years—nearly a decade.
I consider myself cured of psychosis or schizophrenia, and frankly, the distinction doesn't matter to me, but let's at least avoid crushing the hope of anyone reading this.

Noah Garcia4 said:So, what you're saying is you cured your schizophrenia just by switching over to bipolar?

No, I don't think so, because from my perspective, bipolar disorder doesn't really overlap with schizophrenia or psychosis at all.
It’s entirely possible I’ve always been bipolar.
The schizophrenia and psychosis were simply much more severe and required active treatment, whereas the other labels—anxiety, panic attacks, OCD, or general mental instability—were mostly secondary things the doctors didn't bother focusing on.
To be honest, I can't see the connection between being diagnosed as bipolar now and having dealt with schizophrenia or psychosis in the past, though I never actually pressed my doctors for a direct explanation.
The bipolar diagnosis only came much later, once I was supposedly "recovered," back when I had lost interest in everything except avoiding a stay in a locked psychiatric ward.
I still maintain that bipolar belongs in the same category as schizophrenia and that they essentially exclude one another, which would imply that if I'm bipolar today, I couldn't have had schizophrenia twenty years ago, though I can't say for sure since even the psychiatrists couldn't reach a consensus on what was actually happening.

Chloe Lewis4 said:Fair point. I misread that—it's 50% who attempt suicide at some point in their lives. My sister falls within that 10% bracket. By the way, if you say you're cured, does that mean you're off the meds? Can you actually function normally without antipsychotics?

I’ve cycled through several diagnoses over the years, mostly varying forms of psychosis and schizophrenia, specifically hebephrenic and paranoid types. I'm not entirely sure if they even use the term "schizophrenic psychosis" much these days, but that was my last official label. The medication I was on, Lexapro, is essentially the same whether the diagnosis is psychosis or schizophrenia. My primary psychiatrist told me it didn't really matter what the specific label was; the priority was staying on the meds and attending follow-ups to prevent a total relapse. Things gradually improved, and we started tapering my Lexapro dose. However, about a year after being discharged, my blood work came back abnormal, forcing me to stop taking Lexapro entirely. There wasn't an alternative that worked; I tried everything the hospital systems could throw at me, and nothing helped. I kept seeing psychiatrists and going to my appointments, and eventually, things stabilized enough that I didn't need any medication at all.
Nowadays, most psychiatrists argue it wasn't actually schizophrenia, though back then the consensus was split between those certain it was schizophrenia and those who viewed it strictly as psychosis.
My current diagnosis is bipolar disorder, and I only take lithium. I also have an antipsychotic on hand that I don't actually take, which is intended for emergencies if I feel a lapse coming on, though the logic always escaped me because when you're in a psychotic state, you usually feel perfectly fine and wouldn't realize you need something to bring you back to reality.
The bottom line is that no one can accurately pin down what my diagnoses used to be, as I appear completely normal to the outside world.
And unfortunately, my sister took her own life; she was the most level-headed person in our family and never had a single diagnosis.

Larry Lewis said:I know plenty of people living with schizophrenia, and honestly—if I’m being completely blunt—not one single person I’ve met has ever truly been cured.

I was hospitalized just once about twenty years ago, involving a single prolonged episode that spanned several different facilities.
Back then, the consensus was that 25% of patients with schizophrenia could actually recover, an idea that even the patients themselves embraced, which meant they didn't view being admitted to a psychiatric ward with such a diagnosis as a particularly dire fate if it happened to be their first time.
Check the other reply for more details.

Chloe Lewis4 said:It's commendable that you want to be a friend and support her. Most people run from that kind of responsibility. I don't want to scare you, but since you admitted you don't know what you're stepping into, you need to hear this: schizophrenia, like most mental illnesses, is incurable, and 50% of patients commit suicide. No matter how attractive she is, do not initiate sex. People with these conditions often have a lowered libido due to the illness itself or the medication; you have to let her decide when it happens. If you aren't being honest and you're just looking to get under her skirt, you will only make things worse.

The bolded part isn't accurate. While I am not claiming schizophrenia is just a common cold, the suicide rate is significantly lower than 50%, appearing to be well below 10% from my perspective.
About twenty years ago, there was a belief that 25% of schizophrenia patients could achieve a full recovery.
Some of the diagnoses I personally dealt with were the most severe forms, specifically hebephrenic and paranoid schizophrenia. By definition, hebephrenia is considered incurable, yet I managed to almost completely recover in less than two years, though the accuracy of an initial diagnosis is always a matter of debate.
There is a vast spectrum of schizophrenia types, and every patient experiences them differently; many never require hospitalization, and even those who do sometimes find their way back to health.

Ronald Wilson2 said:Met a girl on a dating app recently and she told me she’s living with schizophrenia... we're around the same age... her story really hit me hard, she says she's only hanging on for the sake of her brothers... I offered my friendship and I truly care, I feel like I can actually help her somehow... She's beautiful, and honestly, I've never had any trouble finding a girlfriend myself, but that's not the point here... Her life is just so heavy, and knowing everyone abandoned her after she got sick at 18... I want to fight for people like this... I want to help... I just don't know what I'm getting myself into... After talking for a bit, she already told me she loves me... well, of course she would say that given everything she's going through... I spend so much time talking to her... sometimes I'm actually scared to be Salty with her because I don't know how she'll react.... But I'm never going to walk away from her as a friend... I'd even give her more than just friendship... I believe every illness can be cured because sickness doesn't come from God, it comes from Satan... I lived in Lourdes once... and I saw with my own eyes that healing is possible... If I could only take her there... maybe a miracle would happen, maybe not... but anything is possible....

When dealing with schizophrenia, medication is the only real answer. Please don't bring up Satan or God; religious themes can actually make things worse for certain types of schizophrenic patients.

The reality is that medication is the only thing that works, and the hardest part is when they start making statements about only living for their family or some other external reason instead of themselves.

If you actually want to be helpful, make sure she stays consistent with her meds and attends all her appointments at places like the Mayo Clinic. Just talk to her like a normal person; don't spend the whole time treating her like a patient. There are plenty of other topics to discuss besides her diagnosis.

And whatever you do, don't take advantage of her vulnerability for your own physical gratification.

Sandra Myers7 said:What does a "normal" amount of sleep even look like here? For example, she goes to bed around midnight, wakes up around 8 AM, and then takes a two-hour nap in the afternoon. But honestly, she can't get by without Normabals. She’s the only one who can skip them at night, but she has to take them during the day to sleep, otherwise, if she doesn't nap in the afternoon, she just spirals into a deeper depression...🤷

That’s a question for a psychiatrist; I’m certainly not one.

Personally, I find ten hours of sleep a day to be excessive, and if someone has to rely on medication just to force a two-hour nap in the afternoon, that doesn't strike me as a sustainable solution. There are plenty of medications out there designed to treat depression or schizophrenia without making sleep an issue.
Usually, sedation is reserved only for those critical cases where nothing else works; sleeping through the day because of heavy medication isn't actual treatment, it's just buying time until a drug finally kicks in. But based on everything you’ve laid out, she isn't exactly a critical case if she's just sitting at home.
Then again, if surviving on a two-hour afternoon nap is enough to get you through the day, maybe there simply isn't a better way to live.

Sandra Myers7 said:I’m honestly not even sure how to put what’s going on right now into words, but it’s just heavy... really depressing. There’s this constant, nagging fear of being alone and this overwhelming feeling of being totally abandoned. It leads to a lot of mindless coffee and cigarette consumption, and I honestly don't know if that's even wise given everything else I'm doing with therapy... But basically, after those intense sessions where everything just comes pouring out, it feels like I can sleep through all the chaos that happened and just drift back into some kind of normal again...

I assume this is a commentary on paranoid schizophrenia rather than simple anxiety.

Everything needs to be laid bare before a psychiatrist. You have to disclose every detail, every symptom, and every underlying issue, because a doctor can't possibly guess what's happening behind closed doors. It's the same story with medication side effects; one person might feel nothing while another struggles significantly. You absolutely must talk to the doctor instead of just quitting the treatment mid-stream, as they are the only ones equipped to evaluate all the variables and decide which medication is appropriate and for how long.
If my memory serves me, coffee and cigarettes aren't nearly as damaging as alcohol or marijuana, though chronic sleep deprivation remains a massive obstacle for these types of conditions.

Sandra Myers7 said:Posts have been moved from the thread about experiences and recommendations.

The diagnosis was made three years ago, and since then, she’s had three major episodes—by which I mean periods where she genuinely believes people are following her and eavesdropping on her. These episodes usually last between a month and two months, and everything settles down if she stays on a regular regimen, though that obviously involves a heavy dose of sleep aids. Right now, she's doing okay and is fully aware of everything that happened; she's facing it head-on. I guess I just wanted to reach out and see if anyone else could offer some insight, maybe get a second opinion from a doctor in a place like Los Angeles, just to see if there's still a chance for a full recovery...

I am no psychiatrist, but my understanding is that any case of schizophrenia or psychotic schizophrenia is treated aggressively immediately following the first hospitalization because the whole point is to prevent the next episode from happening.
After three episodes, it's hard to say. I suspect the medication she’s on isn't actually for sleep, but rather antipsychotics, though you should probably ask her doctor to clarify why they aren't.
There is an entire spectrum of typical and atypical antipsychotics designed to manage almost any kind of psychosis, provided they are taken consistently. If one doesn't work, there are more than ten others to try. While many cause drowsiness, those aren't sleep aids. Sleeping pills have nothing to do with treating paranoid schizophrenia or similar conditions.
I personally cycled through various antipsychotics until I finally found one that worked, or perhaps I simply mastered the art of appearing normal.
In her situation, the objective is likely preventing the next breakdown, and it will be up to her doctor to decide if long-term antipsychotic use is necessary or if medication should only be used when a psychotic episode begins.