7 posts shown.
George Sullivan31 said:My buddy passed away today. I'm still in shock.
Sending you my deepest condolences.
I lost my dad just last month, and after I posted about it here, I basically vanished from the forum.
Coming back now and seeing two more people going through this... man, I am truly sorry.
After dealing with all this, nothing scares me anymore except for things like cancer, liver cirrhosis, or leukemia.
The common stuff? Like the flu or a cold? Doesn't even register on my radar anymore.
My dad passed away this past Sunday. He fought like hell until the very end—even Sunday morning, he was still trying to reach out and pull himself up with our help.
The biggest lesson I've learned through this whole nightmare is that you can count the doctors actually doing their jobs at the local hospital in Boston on one hand. If you find yourself in this situation, my advice is to get as far away from there as possible. It feels like the people in white coats are just shoveling money into their pockets while providing zero actual care.
How do they live with themselves?
Thanks to everyone for the support, especially Angela Wright. All we can do now is hope Dad is in a better place.
Best,
Angela Wright said:Look, there’s a standard protocol for treating colon cancer. If the K-ras test shows they have wild-type, the go-to options are Avastin or Erbitux.
Both of these are smart drugs, and honestly, they don't wreck you nearly as hard as the chemo your dad is currently on. Personally, I think it's just plain crazy to keep hitting someone with stuff that totally crushes them physically and mentally just because we're hoping it works, especially when these newer, innovative drugs actually target the tumor directly.
If your dad has specific targets—I'm not sure if he does yet—it makes total sense to start with one of these two in the first line of treatment, especially since they're covered under Medicare now. If things progress to a second line of defense, he might not be able to get them covered by insurance anymore, meaning he’d have to pay out of pocket, and man, those aren't cheap. Otherwise, you just keep taking the medication as long as it's working, which can literally last for decades.
Thanks so much, finally someone who can explain this clearly and simply. My dad does have metastases; they were in his lungs but cleared up, so now it's just in his liver. Thanks again, seriously. 🙂
Angela Wright said:Honestly, honey, go get a second opinion. Just because someone’s a friend and means well doesn't mean they've got all the answers or are the smartest person in the room.
We've talked to several doctors and they're saying it's not quite as critical yet—his cancer actually shrank and he's responding to treatment. It's just that he's been having a really rough few days, and that's what's weighing on me...
I can't tell if it's because of what they found on his brain, the chemo, or just because he hasn't been eating anything at all. 😢
Angela Wright said:Did your dad ever get Avastin, or did anyone even bring that up with you guys?
We can get Avastin whenever we want, really, but his doctor—who’s actually a close family friend—thinks it’s just not the right move for him right now. He feels like we can handle this through the current chemo rounds instead. It’s a tough one, though... just like any heavy-duty medicine, the best stuff can also be the hardest on the body. :S
slyowl10 said:My dad has a pancreatic tumor, and he's doing really poorly. He’s starting to get disoriented and doesn't realize where he is.
He keeps saying he wants to go home, but he *is* home. He hasn't eaten anything for days; he just lies there. Is it possible the metastases spread to his brain? He doesn't have headaches, just pain in his stomach area, and he's incredibly depressed.
How can I make him more comfortable? It's terrifying even typing this out, let alone imagining what he's going through.
My dad has colon cancer, and he's dealing with the exact same thing—stomach pain, depression, zero appetite, and vomiting everything he tries to swallow, including meds. He just lies there all day, barely talks, mostly just sleeps. 😢 At the start of treatment, they found some growths on his brain, one about 8mm and another 1cm, which they're treating as metastases. This started after his left side went numb and he began losing consciousness. He actually thought he was having a stroke, which made him super anxious and stressed. The doctors didn't dig too deep into it because, in their minds, when you have cancer, any irregularity is automatically flagged as a metastasis. But honestly, his mind is totally sharp—he’s thinking completely normally and hasn't had any cognitive changes at all.
So yeah, we are in the exact same boat.
I'm honestly at a loss on how to help him either. I'm right there by his side all day, trying to talk to him, but he just shuts down and wants to sleep. Mentally, he's just completely wiped out. We headed to the hospital today because he was crashing—hasn't eaten since Sunday and things were getting worse. The doctors gave him this kind of nutritional supplement, a liquid packed with minerals, vitamins, glucose, and stuff, specifically for chemo patients who can't keep food down. You just take it in small sips whenever you can. Since we got back from the hospital around 1 PM, he's sipped it a few times and hasn't thrown up, so I'd definitely recommend giving that a shot.🙂
Hey, I could really use some advice if anyone's got it.
My dad was diagnosed with colon cancer that had spread to his liver last September. He had surgery to remove the primary tumor and started chemo right after. But get this—right after the surgery, he and my sister saw this doctor who was incredibly rude to him, and right then, he felt numbness spreading down his entire left side. When it came time for chemo, they found two tiny spots on his brain. They think it’s a metastasis, but honestly, there’s a chance it was just a stroke triggered by the stress of that encounter with the doctor. It feels like once you have a cancer diagnosis, every little glitch in the body gets labeled a metastasis without them even running the proper tests. 🙏
After a few rounds of radiation, those spots on his brain shrank a bit, so he started taking dexamethasone to keep things under control. Then he moved on to chemo: 8 cycles of Xeloda. He’d get an infusion every other week and then take two Xeloda pills orally for the rest of that week.
He was doing great, honestly. No nausea, he was working, walking, doing everything himself—you wouldn't even know he was sick. The cancer seemed to be backing off and his labs were always solid. But eventually, the therapy hit its limit; it stopped fighting the cancer and just started beating up his system instead. His blood work tanked, so they prescribed 8 more cycles of a much harsher treatment. I don't know the exact name, but doctors usually call these the "heavy hitters" used here in the States. After the treatment, he gets wiped out and can't even get out of bed, but it only lasts a couple of days before he's back to feeling awesome. We even looked into getting Avastin, but his doctor said it wasn't necessary since things aren't catastrophic yet; he figured it would just wreck his body even more.
So, after his last treatment last Tuesday (July 27th, 2010), he was weak for a few days like usual, then fine. But then this Sunday, everything changed. He suddenly stopped eating, has zero strength in his arms and legs, won't talk, and if he tries to eat anything, he vomits. Since he takes a ton of meds but isn't eating, he just throws the pills straight back up. His urine has turned reddish, too. He already had two IV infusions, but he kept vomiting. This morning, we rushed him to the ER because he was a total wreck—he couldn't even lift his head, so we had to carry him in on a stretcher. They checked his heart, lungs, bloodwork, blood pressure—everything looked perfect. The doctors say this is "normal" for his diagnosis because he hasn't been eating. They gave him fluids (basically meal replacements for chemo patients) and anti-nausea meds, because he took Zofran one day and still puked. They think the IV will stabilize him and he'll turn a corner.
Today, my sister and mom tried helping him to the bathroom, and even though they were basically carrying him, he just blacked out. He came to quickly, but his eyes rolled back in his head.
I'm hoping it's just from the lack of food, given he's juggling 30 pills a day, heavy chemo, and IVs. But I'm terrified something is going on with those spots on his brain, especially since he didn't take his dexamethasone last night to stop the vomiting. I'm scared it might have spread to his stomach.
We thought about leaving him at the hospital today because we just don't know how to handle it when stuff like this happens. But then again, he'll definitely get better care at home. In a hospital, nurses might let him vomit or deal with accidents and then make him struggle through the cleanup and changing. At home, we make sure he's comfortable immediately. We bought him adult diapers today because we don't want him struggling to make it to the bathroom.
If anyone has any thoughts or advice, please just be real with me. Anything helps.
I just want all of this to be over. I can't stand watching a man who was working and enjoying life just a few days ago suffer like this and be stuck in bed.