Posts by Amanda Martinez28

5-crumbs, how’s your mom doing?

Rose, I'm crossing my fingers and praying everything turns out okay—that it’s not metastases.

Sending love to everyone. Really pulling for you guys to win this fight, since my dad couldn't.

Lisa White54 said:Amanda Martinez28, please accept my deepest condolences. I know your father is in a much better place now, watching over you, knowing you did absolutely everything possible for him.
Hang in there.

Thanks so much, Lisa White54.
You and your husband are such an inspiration to so many people.
Wishing you guys nothing but the best.

Angela Wright said:Amanda Martinez28, and everyone else who has lost someone recently—I’m inviting you to join this topic I started after losing my mom. I realized that my own grief and how much I miss her won't really help those currently fighting their battles here. It might even be upsetting or counterproductive for them.
Let's talk about that over there.

You're totally right. Sorry to anyone still fighting; I didn't mean to come off as selfish.

Melissa Parker37 said:Honey, I just saw this. I am so sorry. Please accept my deepest condolences.
I know everything you've been through, and it’s honestly incredible how much strength God gives us during times like these. Your father knew how much you loved him and how hard you fought for him.
Believe me, right after my dad passed, I’d wake up thinking he was going to call me to come pick him up from the hospital. I could practically feel him sitting there in the living room with me, just listening to him breathe. I was haunted by this guilt and anger, wondering what else I could have done for him when I didn't.
It’s only now, almost three months later, that I’m feeling grateful. Grateful that I had the grace to care for my dad while he couldn't move—to feed him, to comfort him, to talk to him when he couldn't speak, to hold his hand and tell him I loved him...
And I'm so thankful I got the chance to say goodbye.
Don't worry, sweetie. Unfortunately, it just had to be this way, and there's nothing we can change. Our fathers are up there somewhere, watching over us like guardian angels. I truly believe that. Sending kisses. 😘

Thanks Melissa Parker37, and thanks quietraven0. I know Dad is in a better place now, finally free from all the pain and that awful suffocating feeling. But man, how do you make peace with the fact that you'll never see him, hear him, or kiss him again? Ugh, I miss him so much I feel like I'm losing it. It feels heavier every single day.

quietraven0 said:Amanda Martinez28
I’m scared to even ask, but here I go—how is everyone doing? Is your dad okay?

My father passed away on October 5th, and we held the funeral on October 6th—right on my birthday.
What can I even say? It was horrible. Just absolutely terrifying. And I had to witness it all because he kept calling for me, and he was conscious almost until the very end. Watching your closest person struggle to breathe right in front of you while you're sick yourself—and him practically begging you for help—my dears, it was just too much. I’ll never be able to erase the image from my mind of the ER nurse rushing past him, all dressed up, kneeling by his bed desperately trying to find a vein. Even the guy from the day before started crying while looking for a vein and had to call a colleague over just to help him. But the hardest part? My dad passed away in my mother's arms at 3:15 PM on October 4th. Then, around 6:00 PM, he was back in my brother's arms. And then, around 9:00 PM, near the doctor, somehow, amidst all our screaming and wailing, he seemed to come back to us. It's impossible to describe. After the second time, I went to church, lit a candle, and just prayed to Jesus to take him home soon. Now, I just have to hold onto the hope that my father isn't angry, and that he knows everything I did, I did for his own good.

To everyone out there fighting this evil: I truly, from the bottom of my heart, want you to win. Every single victory of yours is a joy to me, and I’ll always be right here standing with you.

Best,

Carol Mitchell86 said:After the consultation in Stoneville today, my mom finally got the green light for radiation. She's heading home now while we sort out all the paperwork—she couldn't stay at the hospital right away, unfortunately. Now we just need to scramble to get her a radiation appointment ASAP. They mentioned some people are waiting up to three months, which is terrifying.
But here's the thing: the neurosurgeon who did her first surgery is suggesting a whole new plan. She thinks the MRI scans aren't clear enough and suspects it might actually be a hematoma rather than a tumor, so she wants to go in and suction it out instead. What do you guys think? Should I push for a new MRI before they proceed with any surgery?

Sent you a DM.

quietraven0 said:Sorry I’m just getting back to you, my computer was acting up.
My mom is home now, she's on some stronger antibiotics, and things seem to be looking up. If everything stays on track, she might start her first round of chemo by the end of the month.
Fingers crossed!

Amanda Martinez28, I'm so glad your dad got admitted to the hospital. Now they can actually do what needs to be done, and you'll have a little more peace of mind. Hang in there, and please keep us posted when you can.

I'm really happy you checked in and that your mom is feeling better. Could you let me know which antibiotics she's taking?
None of the ointments seem to be working for my dad. I actually tried to take him home this morning, but they kept him there because his scan looks the same and he was vomiting yesterday, so they need to check that out too. Honestly, I don't know what to do anymore—this is just exhausting, and it feels like even the doctors are stumped. That bacteria is being so stubborn, it's scary. Please, you absolutely HAVE to take your mom to get bloodwork and a CRP test, maybe even at a private clinic, just to make sure nothing gets missed like it did with my dad and the infection comes back.

Keeping my fingers crossed that the treatment kicks in and everything goes smoothly.

Best,

quietraven0, how's your mom doing?
My dad's back in the hospital again.

quietraven0 said:Amanda Martinez28, hang in there!
Any news on the results? What’s the word from Doc?

Yeah, the results came in. Dad had to head straight back to the hospital because he’s dealing with another nasty bout of pneumonia. We were stuck waiting there for four hours—I was barely holding it together, so I can't even imagine how he felt. The doctor who saw us was super rude at first, but we actually ended up hitting it off by the end 😉. Honestly, she was right about everything; she just gave the info to the wrong person—me, I guess. Anyway, they sent him home, but she wrote out his full treatment plan, so he's getting everything he needs like he were still in the hospital. He's thrilled to be back home, and honestly, so am I. He ran a fever last night, but we managed to get it down and he slept through the night. He's doing much better today. He's even starting to eat again, and I can see a little spark of hope returning to him. As for me, I'm calm for now, but I'm definitely still feeling pretty tense.
How's your mom doing? What did they find in her tests? What kind of meds are they putting her on?

Best,

quietraven0 said:Amanda Martinez28,
your dad probably just hit a wall or he's feeling worn out, but try not to let him spiral into those heavy thoughts. Try to pull him out of it with something totally different—not about the illness or any of that stuff, but things you know actually make him happy. Just try to get a smile out of him. Reminisce about some silly old memory, anything, just to remind him life isn't all worry.
He’ll be better in a few days, just hang in there and don't let his low moments drag you down too. Stay strong and keep your head up; you know the sun always comes out after the storm.

Look, we’ve dealt with our fair share of rough patches and we’ve made it through, but this? This is just brutal. Dad is struggling to breathe, this cough won't quit, and today he spiked a fever and started vomiting. He can't even eat. It's heartbreaking. Watching him decline like this when I feel so helpless... it's killing me. I begged them on Wednesday to start antibiotics, but they’re insisting on more tests just to "prove" there's an infection. I asked for something to help with the coughing, maybe something stronger to calm him down, but they say it's unnecessary. I told them he needs an IV and something specifically for the breathing issues, period. And then they have the nerve to tell me I should be grateful he looks this good after fighting this for 11 months. Seriously? Why shouldn't he look better? They aren't with him 24/7, so they don't see how bad it really is. He can't even sleep at night; right now, he's passed out in his armchair because lying down makes him choke. It's awful. And what's worse is seeing how they cut corners on patients like him. I'm waiting on results today, then I'm heading in to talk to Doc. I'm praying things ease up, otherwise, it's going to be a fight. I bought a nebulizer for home use so I can give him treatments and help even a little bit, since there's so much I can't do on my own. Man, it hurts. I feel like I'm hitting a breaking point.
Sorry for the vent, I just needed to get it all out to feel even a tiny bit better.
Thanks so much for the support.

quietraven0 said:Amanda Martinez28,
seriously, kudos to you for everything you're doing for your dad. He's lucky to have you in his corner.
Honestly, I’m basically living with a magnifying glass over my mom 24/7 right now. Just gotta catch things early, you know?
We went in for her checkup and they actually ended up admitting her to the hospital. It doesn't look great.😢
But hey, trying to stay positive. She's in the right place and they'll take care of her.
Keep that positive mindset too—hang in there, and good luck this Friday.

They will help her, for sure. Honestly, being at the hospital is probably the best spot for her right now since they've got the oxygen, the right antibiotics, and all that stuff ready to go.
I spent almost the whole day with my dad today, and man... the hardest part is just watching him slowly fade away.

Thanks for tomorrow, and please, let me know how your mom is doing.

quietraven0 said:Right now, that nasty infection we're dealing with is what's really keeping me up at night.

Quiet raven, I'm reaching out because what my dad is going through feels a lot like what your mom is facing. The big difference is that your mom actually got her surgery—honestly, thank God for that. With my dad, they backed out of the surgery at the very last second because during the mediastinoscopy, they found two enlarged lymph nodes on opposite sides of his lungs. He actually did pretty well through four cycles of AT&T and two rounds of five-day radiation. But man, the real struggle started when they diagnosed him with pneumonia on May 7th and sent him home. He struggled for seven days before they had to readmit him because his fever spiked. It's a long story, but basically, they let him go after 35 days and we thought we were finally in the clear. Nope. On my own whim, I took him to a private lab for bloodwork, and of course, I saw the infection was back. I rushed him straight to the hospital, where they confirmed the pneumonia had returned, and he ended up stuck there for another 18 days. He finally came home, but I took him for more bloodwork today because something just didn't feel right. I'm taking him back this Friday to redo the tests so we can figure out our next move. Anyway, I just wanted to warn you—these infections are super common for patients like them, and sadly, they can be fatal. I'm pretty sure my dad wouldn't survive another one. You really have to stay on top of everything yourself; if I hadn't been so hands-on, things would have gone south back in March when the doctors almost gave up on him. Honestly, Jasna Radic from the For a New Day forum helped me so much, and I also have a doctor on another forum who gives me daily advice on what to do, because until 11 months ago, I knew absolutely nothing about medicine.
Almost forgot to mention—they found out via blood culture that my dad has Pseudomonas bacteria.
Do you know exactly what's going on with your mom?
Wishing so much luck to you and everyone else here on the forum.
Best,

[QUOTE=Bradley Green;20727422]Look, this just isn't an option. I'm not letting some run-of-the-mill cancer stop me from... 🙂[/QUOTE

Wow. Honestly, I don't think I've ever read a better sentence in my entire life. Seriously, props to you—that kind of optimism alone puts you 80% of the way to being healthy already.

Sending all the good vibes in the world your way. 👍[/QUOTE]