Posts by stormynomad20

I've got two boxes sitting here—that's 8 packs total—of Molinea, along with some adult diapers in size Medium. I'd really love to pass these along to someone who could actually put them to good use! If you're interested, just shoot me a private message.

So, my mom passed away today. Even though I’ve never been much of a religious person—you know how I am—I really, truly hope her soul has found some peace.

Kimberly Wright said:stormynomad20, honey, please walk me through how we're supposed to get a nurse to visit twice a day? 🙂

Anyway, I’ve been picking up Tramadol at the pharmacy—one pack comes with five 50mg ampules, plus the needles and syringes, and it runs me about $8.25. So, looking at just the medication itself, we're spending roughly $1.75 per day.

We actually get the Tramadol covered for free through our primary care physician. What we *do* pay for is the visiting nurse—she stops by every day around noon, and since Mom really needs her injection in the evening, we pay her about $3 per shot for those night visits. Unfortunately, paying out-of-pocket like that is an option, though you have to be careful they don't try to overcharge you—it's almost like encouraging under-the-table work! Just kidding, mostly. In all seriousness, though, sleep has been a massive struggle for us lately; even when Mom isn't in intense pain, she just can't sleep because of the sheer anxiety and fear. My husband actually went to see the GP yesterday to grab some sleeping pills (I'm not sure of the exact name, but apparently, they're quite strong), but it didn't help much—she was still waking up every single hour.

Kimberly Wright said:this whole thing is driving me absolutely insane.
get this—here is what my primary care doctor actually told me when I asked if there was any way to get my mom admitted to the hospital for inpatient care.
"Do you want the honest truth? Would you really want your mother taking up a hospital bed that could be used for someone who can actually be helped? For example, if you got sick and needed a bed, but it wasn't available because someone like your mom was occupying it?"
😲
this comes from a doctor who literally swore an oath to provide equal healthcare to everyone🙄 🙂
so, does my mom have less of a right to that bed? Is her suffering somehow less important than someone else's? She’s paid into this system just like everyone else, hasn't she? Shouldn't she get help precisely when she needs it most? Why is it considered "okay" to prioritize certain groups while leaving terminal patients hanging? Who honestly gets to play God and decide whose medical care is worth the cost and whose isn't?
it's just disgusting.🤮
I'm telling you, Mom isn't eating anything because the pain is just too much—nothing at all. We are living in the 21st century, yet my mother is facing the possibility of dying from malnutrition.😢

Right now, we're juggling Duragesic patches, Tramadol drops, and once a day, a home health nurse comes by to give her a Tramal injection. That Tramal is the only thing providing even a shred of relief, but I can tell that over the last few days, even that isn't cutting it anymore—and we don't have the option to have a nurse come by twice a day.
what do we do next? 🤷

There actually is a way to get them to come twice a day. You just pay for that second Tramal injection $33 when the nurse makes their second visit of the day. Of course, that has nothing to do with insurance coverage. This answer isn't based on theory; it's based on reality. It's the same old story: if you don't have the cash, you're on your own. It's the unofficial motto of both the American healthcare system and, frankly, the world.

ironsailor22 said:She had breast cancer that had already spread specifically to her bones. By the time she got the diagnosis, there were already metastases in her ribs—though over the course of the illness, they eventually spread through her entire skeleton. She actually underwent some palliative radiation, which helped manage the pain for maybe a month or so, but then things just took a turn for the worse and the pain intensified. In the end, it was a total nightmare—not just for her, but for us too. She was confused, hallucinating, and screaming from the agony... and I felt so helpless, just praying that her suffering would finally come to an end.

I know how incredibly hard it is to look back on those moments, so thank you so much for sharing that with me. It’s tough. My mom was actually at her palliative radiation session today, and right now, she’s in a terrible amount of pain and can't keep any food down. The Doctor promised he’d work closely with the palliative care team to figure out a better way to manage the pain. To top it all off, another mass has appeared on her head.

ironsailor22 said:I totally get where you're coming from—I went through something almost identical with my own mother recently.
She had bone metastases, which are just incredibly painful, and it honestly drove me to despair because I felt so helpless trying to support her. It felt like everyone was just passing us around from department to department without actually doing anything meaningful to help. I’m still feeling pretty bitter and angry about our healthcare system—it feels like patients in those situations are just left to fend for themselves along with their families. No one should have to die in that kind of agony when modern medicine clearly has the tools to manage it; it just feels like nobody cares. It's heartbreaking!
You didn't mention what they've been giving her for the pain—my mom was on Durogesic patches the entire time, but even then, the pain was still unbearable. From the moment things took a turn for the worse until the very end, it was about two months of pure agony.
I am sending so much love to your mom—I hope she finds some relief from the pain—and wishing you and your dad all the strength and courage in the world! Hang in there!

ironsailor22, I just wanted to ask—did your mom only have the bone metastases, or did it eventually spread somewhere else too?

ironsailor22 said:I feel for you—I truly do—because I went through something almost identical with my own mother recently.
She had bone metastases, which cause this incredibly intense pain, and it honestly drove me to despair because I felt so helpless watching her suffer. It felt like everyone was just passing us around from one department to another without actually doing anything meaningful to help her. I’m still so bitter and angry about how our healthcare system operates—it’s heartbreaking when patients like her are basically left to fend for themselves alongside their families. No one should ever have to die in that kind of agony; modern medicine absolutely has the tools to manage it, but it feels like nobody actually cares to use them properly. It's just awful!
You didn't mention what she's currently taking for the pain—my mom was on Durogesic patches the whole time, but even then, the pain remained unbearable. From the moment things took a sharp turn for the worse until the very end, it was about two months of pure, relentless agony.
I am sending so much love to your mom—I hope she finds some relief—and wishing you and your dad all the courage and strength in the world! Hang in there!

Thank you so much for the support, and my heart really goes out to your mother. She is currently using Durogesic (we're up to the 200 dose right now), plus a Tramal injection if the pain flares up more than usual. She’s also taking Zaldiar and Mizar. We are actually pushing for palliative radiation from the doctor—after about ten different requests—so I’m really hoping that finally provides some relief.

Joshua Thompson9 said:Are there any pressure sores from lying down? For that, some baby cream from Johnson & Johnson works wonders...
Hang in there—I know how much it sucks to hear stuff like that, but keep your chin up!!!

Thanks for the tip! We actually picked up some Activision gel from Abel, and it seems to be doing the trick. I really appreciate the support. That’s just how it goes—one day is better, the next is a struggle—but we aren't giving up that easily.

Six years ago, my mom was diagnosed with uterine sarcoma. She went through surgery followed by chemotherapy, which actually managed to put things into remission for a while. Everything seemed fine for about a year and a half after that. Then, the back pain returned, leading to more surgery and radiation treatments.
Since then, she’s dealt with these absolutely excruciating pains in her leg, though we managed to find some temporary relief using homeopathic remedies. She also has a large growth on her head—which her doctor isn't worried about—and another growth on her sternum. About two years ago, before we started the homeopathy, the doctor gave us a terminal diagnosis. To manage the pain, she was using Durogesic patches, but they made her vomit terribly. (She still deals with nausea today, just less intensely; a homeopathic remedy actually helped stop the vomiting entirely during that worst stretch.) In the meantime, she underwent another round of radiation. Even though the constant nerve pain and numbness in her legs (switching between left and right) had subsided somewhat, everything has taken a sharp downward turn since New Year's. A poor-quality X-ray revealed metastases in her spine and neck. For about six months now, she's been in unbearable pain and has almost zero mobility—it's a massive struggle just to help her to the bathroom, and both my dad and I are providing constant support (she's even using a tripod cane now). Her right arm hurts too, and she's just completely drained of strength. Every day feels harder than the last, and today she had to start using adult diapers. Her doctor gently broke the news that we are reaching the end, though honestly, I suspect he missed the mark on that initial terminal diagnosis since he wouldn't give us any specific timeline back then. We consulted a physical therapist who told us her spine is in worse shape than anything he's ever seen. At this point, her primary doctor has essentially washed his hands of her and our family. We have a visiting nurse coming by, and my daughter has been an absolute hero helping out with Mom. Between all of this, my dad has lost 15 pounds over the last year and a half, and both he and I are at our breaking point—I'm working full-time, and Dad is currently unemployed. Mom's mental state is devastating; she just wants it all to be over. She spends most of her time lying down because the pain in her lower back is so intense (we suspect there might be metastases in her pelvis and hip as well). I’m not even sure if it has spread to her vital organs because the doctor won't order any more scans—he only ran blood work, which came back looking okay, so he mentioned the possibility of one last round of chemo (though he admitted to the nurse he’s afraid it might actually kill her). Other than that, she's relatively stable. Does anyone know of a good cream to help with the discomfort of being bedridden? What should we expect next? And how much time does she realistically have left? Wishing everyone luck in their own battles.