Posts by crimsondrifter2

Kimberly Wright said:my mom passed away yesterday

So sorry...

Angela Wright said:John, I am so incredibly sorry you’re going through this... 😢
No matter what happens, you can rest easy knowing you let your mom make her own choices first, and you did everything a son possibly could on your end.

I wish you had reached out sooner; I would have told you to contact the Sailboat Association and their head nurse, Sandra, over in that Small town, USA—she runs the association and she’s an absolute saint. I'm sure she would have helped you out a ton.
Your mom's illness was truly brutal and so unpredictable. Honestly, all those things the doctors told you—which sounded like they were talking to a ten-year-old—is basically the extent of medical knowledge when fighting this disease. It’s just too heavy, and nobody really knows anything for sure, other than the fact that certain treatments work for some people and not for others.
Hang in there and try to focus on yourself now.

Thanks for the support... ran into your posts a lot while reading through everything. Your stuff about fighting alongside your mom helped a lot.
I would've reached out way earlier, but I asked Mom first since she wanted to try bioenergy and Reiki, and she just wanted to talk to people going through the same thing. She was super firm about it, though—said she had my brother, me, and her rosary, and that we were her whole world. Told me to trust us to take care of everything.
When my dad passed, I was only 15. I didn't fully grasp he had cancer until the very end... maybe I knew, but I guess I didn't realize he was actually leaving until his last breath. When he went, it hit me so hard... I just lost my will to live for a while. This massive dark cloud just hung over me forever.
Processing everything differently these days. Still sad, still angry, but also grateful I could show up for her, be there, and help. Found a lot of advice from people like you, so thanks a million.
Wishing you and the little one nothing but the best. Everything's gonna be okay.

casualraven43 said:crimsondrifter2, I am so incredibly sorry...🙂🙂
It’s heartbreaking what you went through. I totally get why you're venting about those "just call the doctors" comments... honestly, just pathetic.
Thank you for helping the rest of us still fighting this fight while you're dealing with all your own pain. Seriously, props to you.
Hang in there... sending love...

I also have to mention how the staff handled things at the Holy Spirit hospital ER. She was waiting for hours in terrible shape. Her heart rate was hitting 150 because of fluid buildup that needed urgent drainage. They just gave her an IV and sent her home like that. Didn't even bother with a cardiac ultrasound.
Watching someone suffer all night like that—she couldn't even lie down, she had to stay propped up against a table just to breathe. That went on for three days until they finally told her "that's just how it goes." It wasn't until the third day they actually did the ultrasound, saw the fluid, and drained it, but it was too late. She passed away a few hours later.
And don't even get me started on waiting forever in the hallway for an X-ray, or how there wasn't even a nurse available, so her own son ended up having to change her diaper in the ER because they'd given her diuretics.
Back in our Small town, USA, we waited five hours in a stuffy hallway! A nurse there wouldn't even help her out of the tub because she was busy handing over her shift... or wouldn't even open a water bottle because my mom was too weak.
The way some people act just leaves me speechless. This woman spent her entire life helping sick kids and anyone she knew; she didn't deserve to be treated like that.
I really believe the whole ordeal sped up her passing. All that suffering from the wait times and the poor treatment when she should have been their top priority...
I'm just disappointed and angry. I can only hope I gave her at least a little bit of the warmth she wasn't getting where she needed it most.
Hospital care is such a gamble, and the odds of landing a decent doctor or nurse are slim to none.
I feel like I should have spoken up more, pushed harder. But you don't want to be rude to the people holding your mother's life in their hands.
Doesn't change anything, though. If you're going through this, don't hold back. If they're slow, poke them. If they disappear, demand to know where they are. If they stall, tell them straight up that you want the truth! If they won't do their job, make noise. Threaten to go to the hospital director or the news if you have to. There are plenty of nurses out there waiting for a job who would actually do the work properly.
All in all, it's a tragic story. Wishing everyone else fighting this nothing but the best and a quick recovery. Good luck.

Back in May '95, when I was 15, I lost my dad to stomach cancer. Then, the other night at 11:15 PM, I lost my mom to aggressive bronchial adenocarcinoma.
It’s heavy. Just feeling sad and angry all at once...
Ever since I found out about her diagnosis a month and a half ago, I haven't left her side. I made sure she had everything—love, food, juices, you name it. I scoured every forum, article, and book I could get my hands on. You guys really helped me out with your own stories, so thanks for that.
I have to say, I'm pretty disappointed with how the doctors handled things at the Small town, USA clinic. Even though we knew from the start this diagnosis was a disaster. We're talking bronchial adenocarcinoma that spread to the lungs, heart, and bones, plus all the complications with fluid buildup in the lungs, heart, and abdomen. Despite all that, they just pushed chemo on her without any real explanation. Of course, I did my homework and asked the basic stuff. Like, what's the prognosis, and does it even make sense to put her through chemo right now?
The answers I got were basically for a 10-year-old. "We don't know," "we have no idea how she'll react," etc. I fought against it, but Mom trusted the doctors... obviously.
I supported her, though. I explained the whole situation to her, and she made her choice.
On the alternative side, I tried everything possible—shiitake mushrooms, vegan cheese, flaxseed oil, Breuss teas, veggie juices, beta-glucan, Q10, Omega-3, all that. She actually got stronger for a bit, but once they pumped her full of those toxins, she didn't stand a chance. She passed away three weeks later.
Just really think long and hard about treatment options if anyone you love deals with this damn disease.
Stay close to your people. Give them unconditional security and love, no matter what your relationship was like before. That's what matters most.
P.S. Kudos to the doctors and nurses at the Holy Spirit hospital; they were honest and attentive.
Avoid that Small town, USA clinic. They're just underpaid robots with no hearts. Not gonna get into the specifics of what happened there because, honestly, it doesn't even matter anymore...