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shadowbison75 said:Hello Mayaaaaa, unfortunately we are all either dealing with this or going through incredibly difficult times ourselves and for our families...😢
Situations like this fundamentally change your life and priorities; nothing is ever quite the same again.
My father wasn't sick for long, but his condition deteriorated so rapidly—as fast as you can imagine—and what was worst of all was that he suffered greatly.
Both my mother and I, along with the rest of the family, stayed positive in front of him, talking about the future... while internally we were breaking apart because we knew the illness would only progress (we were prepared for that immediately) and that he wouldn't see the future we were discussing. But he kept planning and dreaming, and we provided the support for him to do so...
I suppose that sense of perceived positivity is what kept him with us just a little bit longer. He never complained and cooperated fully with the doctors; they even praised him for being an ideal patient...
A person would do anything to help their loved one, but you simply don't have that kind of superpower. 😢
Be each other's support system: you, your brother, and your mom... stay close. At the same time, try to carve out a little time for yourself during the day: maybe a walk, a coffee, a workout... something small just for you. I know nothing feels good right now and there is no reason to be happy, but at least take a few minutes to leave the house with a friend or a neighbor... Of course, the same applies to everyone else in your household.
Illness is truly exhausting for the patient, but also for the family and the caregivers looking after them.
I will never forget the words of a palliative care nurse who told us that while we are taking care of him, we also have to "take care" of ourselves...
I wish you all the strength needed to walk through this difficult period of your lives together! 🙂🙂🙂
Yes, these things completely alter your life; you realize what actually matters most. And what you said is true—illness exhausts not just the patient, but their entire circle, because it is incredibly hard to watch and feel powerless to help that person. 😢
I am sincerely sorry about your father. They say everything happens for a reason and everyone carries their own cross. I am glad that you stood by him as a family; staying together is what matters most. 😁
Thank you for sharing your experience and for the kind advice. Sometimes a warm word means a great deal. Best regards 😁
Hello everyone.
I am not quite sure where to begin. I suppose I just came here to clear my head and share these difficult moments with some people who might actually understand.
My father is battling prostate cancer that has metastasized to his bones. He has been undergoing chemotherapy for nearly two years now, and it seems there is no end in sight. Since the disease is incurable, we are essentially just trying to keep it under control. It is difficult to accept the reality that there is no cure for such a cruel illness. I find myself hoping for a miracle occasionally, though I am usually forced back to reality very quickly.
We dealt with serious illness in our family about 15 years ago. I was quite young then, but I remember much of it. Unfortunately, the prognosis this time is poor, and I sometimes struggle with how to process that.
I still live with my parents and brother, and navigating these recent years has been incredibly taxing because the hardships have been so frequent. We have dealt with everything from a pulmonary embolism to the final diagnosis, the grueling chemotherapy sessions, and the various side effects. At times, he appears to be handling it well—he is mentally strong—but then a moment later, it is clear he hasn't truly made peace with the diagnosis and that it is wearing him down.
How do you all cope with the illness of a loved one? What helps you keep moving forward with your own life? Does anyone have advice? I appear to be handling things fine on the surface, but I often find myself crying alone in the shower when no one is watching.
On another note, I have a question regarding Cymbalta. If anyone has experience with this medication, I would greatly appreciate your input.
Because of the chemotherapy, my father has developed nerve damage in his arms and legs; it is called neuropathy. He can walk and functions normally, but his fingers and his legs—from the knees down—frequently go numb, sometimes more intensely than others. He also experiences occasional tingling throughout his body and certain areas are sensitive to touch; it isn't traditional pain, but rather an uncomfortable sensation, especially in his feet.
He tried one type of pill that offered no relief, so his doctor recommended Cymbalta. I understand it is used as an antidepressant, for epilepsy, and for the neuropathy he is experiencing. He has only been taking it for five days, but he is experiencing side effects like weight loss, occasional nausea, and increased sweating. Given that he had chemotherapy about ten days ago, some of these symptoms might be related to that, but it feels like they are increasing. I am wondering if any of you have taken this medication, what side effects you experienced, and whether they subsided quickly.
I apologize for the long post, but I hope someone will take the time to read it. Thank you in advance. 😁