Bobby!

Walter Baker2 said:Baby shouldn't be in daycare this early. They might end up with abandonment issues. I actually have them myself because my mom left me alone in a hospital for a whole week.

That’s why we’re looking at other options right now. But the Germans have made all the parental leave laws so incredibly complicated that we’ll probably need to spend several days just studying the paperwork.🙂

Grace Sanders24 said:And once they start drinking water, what happens when they want something solid to eat? They'll definitely get sick of that milk eventually!🤔

Yeah, he'll probably get bored of it...



We've been trying to get Bebot to sleep for an hour now 🥱 but the only one who's actually asleep is Hans.

Generally speaking, experts suggest keeping kids close to their parents for those first three years.

In essence—a Baby thinks they are just an extension of their mother for at least the first six months.

However, 😬
It won't cause any lasting harm if they start daycare earlier.
At least, that’s what my colleagues at work have experienced.
If you don't have other options, you simply have to make it work.

I used to run a senior care service, but with everything going on due to the pandemic, that's not really an option right now.
My oldest child only ever went to preschool (not that I would have even sent them there, if you ask me 😁).
My son started when he was two and a half; he didn't do daycare, he's older now and went straight into preschool.
That said, they spent more time at home than in school, and both scenarios are 😁

My youngest just started recently—she's two, so she's in daycare since she's too young for preschool.
But, you know, her brother and sister are right there, so it doesn't seem to bother her—at least, not yet 😬

Anthony Nguyen81 said:I used to rely on my parents for childcare, but since the pandemic hit, that whole setup just fell apart.
My oldest only ever went to preschool (honestly, if it were up to me, I’m not even sure she would have gone at all 😁).
My son started daycare at two and a half; he skipped the nursery stage entirely because he was older and went straight into a toddler program.
But they ended up spending way more time at home than in a classroom, and both of them 😁
...

Beyond the risk of separating them too early, I don't want my kid constantly catching every cold under the sun just because they're stuck in a large group. Plus, we probably won't be allowed to bring them in if anyone—kid or parent—shows even a hint of symptoms.
Relying on grandparents for childcare? In this climate, it's a total wash.

Hopefully, we'll have a better idea of what's going on in a few days. At that point, whether my boss likes the decision or not isn't really the priority. My kid's comfort matters more.

Why would he even want to go to daycare? He’d be bored out of his mind. It's just a bunch of messy kids running around, crying and making a scene.🍿

Just read that we're going after Bebot? When is this happening? You guys already started working on it? 🍿

Grace Sanders24 said:So I just read that we're going after Bebot? When? Is this already happening? 🍿

You misread that. 🙂 We haven't started yet, but Wikipedia mentioned the possibility of taking action on the new baby.

Grace Anderson3 said:Beyond just separating them too soon, I’m also worried about my kid constantly catching every cold going around because they're stuck in such a large group for so long. Plus, there's the whole issue where we probably won't be allowed to bring them in if they—or any of us—show even the slightest symptom.
Grandparents helping out doesn't really cut it for us either; it’s just not an option.

Hopefully, we'll have a clearer picture and make a smarter call in a few days, though frankly, how much my boss likes the decision is secondary. My child’s comfort is what actually matters here.

Everyone has their own take on this, built from a mix of good and bad experiences.
Some swear by getting kids around other children early to build up that immune system. Then you have parents who kept their kids home and claim they ended up catching every single childhood illness once they finally hit elementary school. There's also the argument that they learn social skills earlier and develop better speech patterns.

On the flip side, you've got the risk of premature separation and the potential emotional fallout.

The ideal scenario would be a gradual transition, but let's be honest, hardly anyone can afford that kind of flexibility. I know some preschools in the US actually follow that kind of model—they might have the kids stay for just an hour during the first week and then gradually increase the time by an hour each day.

I've also noticed that some kids just take to it much better than others right from the start.

We all know little Bebot is going to be the leader of his pack. 👍

Grace Anderson3 said:You read that wrong. 🙂 We aren't there yet, but Wikipedia already mentioned the possibility of working on the new baby.

So you're saying Bebot would basically be the center of the universe forever? 🍿

Grace Anderson3 and Hans are basically going to have to put their entire lives on hold for the next decade just to cater to Bebot.

Walter Baker2 said:Grace Anderson3 and Hans are basically going to have to put their entire lives on hold for the next decade just to focus on Bebot.

20. Anyone seen Napa lately?🕺

Nicole Myers said:Everyone’s experience is different, which leads to all sorts of conflicting theories, ranging from the pros to the cons.
Some people swear by daycare because it builds up a kid's immunity. Parents who kept their kids at home often report that once they finally hit elementary school, they catch every single bug going around. Plus, there's the early socialization aspect—they tend to pick up language skills faster.

The downsides are obvious: separating them too early can lead to emotional issues.

Ideally, you'd do a gradual transition, but let's be real, hardly anyone can afford that kind of flexibility. I know some preschools in major US cities actually use that model. During the first week, the kids are only there for an hour, and then they slowly increase the time.

I've also noticed that some kids take to it way better than others right from the start.

We all know little Bebot is going to be the boss of his group. 👍

It's impossible to know how it'll actually go until we live through it ourselves. The real headache is that the waiting lists for childcare here are massive (and capacities are even worse if you want a specific slot), so we have to sign up now without having any clue what things will look like in a few months or a year. 🤷
Thanks for sharing this. 😘

Grace Sanders24 said:So basically, the baby is going to be the center of the universe forever? 🍿

Naturally. 😍

Walter Baker2 said:Grace Anderson3 and Hans are going to have to put their own lives on hold for the next ten years just to cater to the baby.

And you really know how to offer comfort, don't you? 🙂

Josh said 20, and honestly, he’s spot on. I’m speaking from direct experience here—I haven't had a life for over two decades.

Grace Anderson3 said:It’s impossible to know how things will play out until we’re actually living through it. The real headache is that the daycare waiting lists here are absolutely massive—and capacity is even tighter during those peak months—so we’re forced to register right now without having any clue what the landscape will look like in a few months, let alone a year. 🤷
Thanks for sharing this... 😘

Exactly. 😍

And you certainly have a way of offering comfort, 🙂

I know several women who took a full year off after having their babies, then eventually brought in an aunt to help out as a sitter for a few hours a day until the kids turned three; they actually coordinated their work shifts just to make that arrangement work as smoothly as possible.

One of my relatives had to put her baby in daycare at just seven months old because her employer was dropping some pretty heavy hints that it was time to get back to the grind. She ended up using a neighbor who watched her kid along with a few other little ones from the block. Once the child hit a year old, they transitioned into preschool, but they did it very gradually.

There really isn't a magic formula, though I suppose there might be academic studies on the "best" way to do it. The problem is that every few years, some new theory pops up to claim the old one was wrong. 🕺

Just keep hugging, cuddling, and kissing that baby 😘 while they're still in your arms, and everything will turn out fine.

The fact that we’re already being pressured to sign up for daycare feels like a total disaster, but when your hand is forced, you don't really have much of a choice. 🕺

Grace Anderson3 said:Beyond the issue of separating them too early, I simply don't want my child catching every single cold that goes around just because they're spending so much time in a larger group setting. Plus, there's the likelihood we won't be allowed to bring them in if they—or any of us—show even minor symptoms.
Grandparent childcare in our family isn't an option—it’s a total non-starter.

Hopefully, we'll have more clarity in a few days—and frankly, how much my employer likes the decision matters less than whether my child actually feels comfortable.

Mine didn't get sick nearly as often, though that was largely because they spent more time at home than in daycare. 😁
We usually kept them home for most of December and a good chunk of January—especially once COVID hit...
When things really kicked off, my wife broke her arm; I ended up taking those two months of parental leave, and I utilized some sick leave through her as well—back then, they weren't going to daycare at all.
I'd estimate they were home maybe 30% of the time in 2019, and closer to 50% in 2021. Even if it's only that much, 😁

They might have only caught a cold once or twice in total.
Now we'll see what happens once the little one starts toddler daycare.

In principle, I recommend waiting as long as possible...
If you can't wait, well, you do what you have to do.

Nicole Myers said:I know a few acquaintances who stayed home with their babies for a full year before hiring a nanny until age three—just for a few hours a day—and they coordinated their work shifts to minimize the impact.

One relative of mine had to put her baby in daycare at just seven months old because her employer was sending those subtle, unmistakable signals that it was time to return to the office. She used a neighbor who watched several kids at once. By one year old, the child started preschool, but even then, it was a gradual transition.

There is no magic formula here—though there might be professional studies suggesting what works best. The problem is that every few years, some new theory pops up to claim the old ones were wrong. 🕺

As long as you are the one providing the hugs, the affection, and the love 😘 while they are with you, everything will turn out fine.

The idea that you have to sign up for daycare this early feels like a disaster—but when the choice is taken away from you, you don't really have an alternative. 🕺

Nannies can be a solid solution, but there are two main drawbacks. 😁
My brother-in-law and his wife tried them; they also received those "subtle" hints to get back to work after only six months.
To this day, his daughter hasn't quite forgiven him for it. 👎

Essentially, the first issue is finding someone you actually trust.
A couple I know hired a sweet elderly lady, only to discover after a few visits that she was teaching their oldest nephew to hit people in the head.
She was let go, and things improved afterward, but in principle, every caregiver has their quirks.
For instance, my kids are constantly trying to ride me like a horse 🤣—since I’m tall, they think it gives them a better vantage point to survey the room.
Nannies tend to be stricter; you don't get that kind of leeway with them—there is usually much more discipline involved.
That has its advantages, certainly, but also its downsides.

The second issue is cost. You are often looking at an 8 or 9-hour workday, and the price tag is at least comparable to minimum wage—it follows the old rule: you get what you pay for.
You often find yourself having to leave work early because the nanny has other commitments.
Realistically, the cost ends up being similar to childcare centers.

Then there are private preschools, which cost extra and might offer better service, but...
In the US, public daycare usually requires vaccinations. For private ones, maybe not.
Theoretically, they could become breeding grounds for all sorts of germs or unvaccinated kids.
That said, our godparents have a kid in a private preschool and say it's fine—mostly because the parents are a bit more affluent, and there haven't been any issues with bad actors. 😁

Goodness, when it comes to raising kids, there are endless variables and possibilities, but also endless ways to mess up.
If you can avoid daycare, it's recommended.
If you can't, well, life goes on.

The baby will be the king of their own little world at school; I think that part is indisputable. 😁

Nicole Myers said:A few acquaintances stayed on maternity leave for a full year and then hired an auntie to babysit until age three, just working a few hours a day. They basically coordinated their work shifts to make sure she was there as little as possible.

One of my relatives had to put her baby in daycare at just 7 months because her job was sending those "subtle" hints that it was time to get back to work. A neighbor watched him along with a few other kids. He didn't start preschool until he was a year old, but even that was a gradual process.

There’s no magic formula. Maybe there are professional studies out there about what works best, but every few years some new theory pops up. 🕺

As long as you're the one cuddling, kissing, and showing them love 😘 while they're actually with you, everything will turn out fine.

The fact that you already have to apply for daycare this early is a disaster. And what choice do you have once you absolutely have to go back? You're stuck. 🕺

Babysitters aren't off the table, but they are a pretty expensive sport. This whole subtle pressure on women to return from maternity leave earlier than they want is just exhausting.👎

There are even more extreme cases regarding daycare enrollment. An acquaintance was looking for a spot for her baby in New York City, where the demand versus capacity gap is even wider. I don't know if she planned on starting daycare at age one or six months, but they suggested she apply for a spot while she was still in her early pregnancy, otherwise she risked not getting a spot when she actually needed it.

Anthony Nguyen81 said:...
In principle, I recommend waiting as long as possible...
If you can't, well, life happens.

We decided that I’ll take two years of parental leave, so we're pushing daycare until the little one turns two. During that second year, I’d ask my employer for reduced hours in the afternoons, right when Hans gets off work.

Grace Anderson3 said:There are even more extreme scenarios out there. An acquaintance of mine was scouting for childcare in New York City—where the gap between demand and available spots is even more staggering. I am not entirely sure if she intended to enroll her baby at one year old or even at six months, but they actually suggested she apply for daycare slots while still in her early stages of pregnancy; otherwise, there is a very real risk of not securing a spot when the time comes.

When I was being recruited for my position, they emphasized that the company provides its own private daycare center.😁

Grace Anderson3 said:We have decided that I will take two years of parental leave, which means delaying daycare until the little one turns two. During that second year, I would request a part-time schedule from my employer during the afternoon hours—right when Hans finishes work.

That sounds reasonable; we arrived at a similar arrangement.
My wife will return to work after the New Year, leaving us with about a year and a half of part-time work remaining.

Keep in mind that if you plan on having a second child, the typical interval is roughly three years—and the baby will likely want a sibling close in age.😁

Anthony Nguyen81 said:...
Keep in mind that if you decide to have another kid, there's usually about a three-year gap between them, and honestly, the baby would probably love having a little brother or sister 😁

Great Hans says we should just wait and see how we handle things with Bebot first.😁

Grace Anderson3 said:Look, Great Hans—let's just hold off until we see how we actually manage things with Bebot.😁

That’s roughly the timeframe.😁
Just assume that every subsequent step becomes significantly easier—and by "significantly," I mean quite a bit.😁

In my professional opinion, you’re much better off getting the baby a house with a backyard where they can actually dig around in the dirt and sand; it's the only way they'll build up any real immunity. These kids growing up in high-rise apartments are constantly catching something.