24/7 shenanigans with Shaquille O'Neal

stormytinker40 said:Does anyone else just completely glitch out when they’re talking to cashiers? Like, I’ll go in just to ask how much something costs and suddenly my brain just goes; Uh... uhhh... mmm... uhh... and then she’s just standing there staring me down, like; do you need a number, what do you need? Ugh... mmm... uhh... do you want a size, what do you want? Just let me finish my sentence so maybe you can actually hear me.

Honestly, this sounds like you had a massive stroke 🤷

Oh god, what if I just had a stroke?

stormytinker40 said:Oh my god, what if I actually had a stroke?

I honestly have zero clue... maybe check out WebMD or something🤷

I don't know. Sometimes a beautiful woman can just strike pure terror straight into my bones.

Anyone in the market for a butt plug? A lady I know is selling them ->

stormytinker40 said:I don't know... sometimes a hot woman can actually be pretty terrifying.

Anyone need a butt plug? A lady is selling them right here ->

I was just scrolling through that myself a sec ago. Is this part of some moderator thing now, or what? 🥳

Oh, come on, don't play dumb. You literally just asked her how much the SML set costs.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how intense is the sensation from a butt plug for women?

stormytinker40 said:Oh, come on, stop playing games... you literally just asked her how much the SML set costs.

So, like, on a scale of 1 to 10, how intense is the butt plug situation for women?

I mean, it totally depends on the woman. And honestly, it depends on the guy too, at the end of the day... 🤷

stormytinker40 said:Does anyone else just totally freeze up when they're talking to sales clerks? Like, I'll go in just to ask how much something costs and suddenly I'm just... uh... um... err... and then she's just standing there staring me down like, "Do you need a number? Do you need help?" And I'm just like, okay, let me actually finish my sentence so maybe you can hear what I'm trying to say.

I think you're being a little rude here. 😳 The question was about what we're doing today (or something like that, 😳)

Well, I already posted my take. As far as the clerk goes, the conversation went pretty smoothly. We were just talking about the 🙂 item, we settled the price, and then I just moved on.

So, yeah, even though I'm not exactly the most talkative or social person, I don't really deal with that awkward freezing thing 😬

Do this while I'm out:

Here’s some music to set the mood;

What happened? You okay? Did you take your meds? Honestly, I wish you’d suggest some more upscale food and drinks for us—we’re at an age where we actually care about what we’re putting in our bodies. I was sipping this stuff back when I was sixteen in the park. I don't think Coca-Cola even existed then, but Ribar was top-tier back in the day!🍿

Listen, you picky little brat. Give it a rest. Ribar has shaped generations upon generations of people. If it weren't for Ribar, half the people walking our streets today would be nothing but lowlifes and thugs.

Did you drink the 'symphony'? Hell no. I downed three liters of $5.00. It felt like a damn orchestra was playing just for me.

Never heard of that symphony. Back in my day, it was all about Ribar and Col. Mixing beer with whiskey was always a bad call. Eventually, people started using their buying power to move toward more refined mid-to-high-end drinks. Honestly, I’m glad the hipsters showed up with those expensive, high-quality craft beers. I’ve fully switched over to them. I used to be strictly a red wine and hard liquor guy, though.🍿

Symphony is hands down the lowest-quality garbage ever sold. You take a sip and suddenly everyone starts giving you these weird looks for no reason. Idiots.

Dragon isn't even craft anymore, and honestly, neither was that San Francisco stuff, so now they just mass-produce it.

Personally, I think a beer-and-cognac combo is the perfect way to unwind.

Are you shopping at Vrutak?

Holy crap. I am wired. This is officially the craziest Christmas Eve ever!

stormytinker40 said:Symphony is some of the lowest-quality garbage I've ever seen. You drink it and people start giving you weird looks for no reason. Idiots.

Zmajsko isn't even craft anymore, and honestly, neither is that San Francisco stuff, so they just mass-produce it now.

For me, mixing beer and cognac is the perfect way to unwind.

You shopping at Vrutak?

Man. I am wired. This is hands down the craziest Christmas Eve ever!

Zmajsko is still around. But it was inevitable they'd go mass-market. Still, I'm sure they won't sell out—at least not with the current ownership. I buy it, obviously. Vrutak has the best selection, though I mostly stick to drafts. I convinced myself those were better, so now I hit up all these trendy spots to see what hits my palate. Why are you so wired? You on something?🤔

Vrutak is alright, I guess. But calling it "legendary craft"? Give me a break. They’re pumping out over 3,000 bottles a day now. Honestly, the beer just isn't what it used to be.

The draft stuff is terrible. And don't even get me started on the stout—it hits me so hard I end up puking most of the time.

I'm constantly wired. If a hangover counts as a rush, then sure, I'm living life on the edge, because I can't stay upright all day. Fish hit the spot today, though. Actually, fish always hits the spot for me.

Man. I seriously can't believe this year is already over.

The recipe and how they prep it is different now. It’s just not the same as it used to be because their head chef moved overseas. Honestly, black pudding doesn't sit right with my stomach anyway. As for liver? In my family, we always stuck to the classics for holidays like this—cod or similar stuff. Don't sweat it though. Things are going to start picking up faster than you think! I remember when I was a kid, standing on the balcony just thinking about how crazy it would be when it finally hits the year 2000. Like, how cool would that be? And look at us, we're already here. Feels like that was just yesterday.🍿

Most of my family are basically Catholic atheists. We used to eat cod, but honestly, it was just out of politeness. My old man hasn't touched fish in years.

It’s linear. No turning back. Just heading straight for the finish line. Dammit.

If things were different, would it actually be any better?

My family gets pretty intense about those kinds of things, but honestly, my mom just isn't a fan of fish, so she's fine with everyone just grabbing takeout today. It all makes sense when you think about it. Obviously, it would be awesome if we could just hit pause on everything and let life go on forever, but that’s not how it works. The truth is, the older you get, the more it feels like time is just flying by. 🍿

Everything’s fine on my end.

Oh, wait. I’m currently texting this girl, and honestly? I’m terrible at it. It’s just not clicking. Either she’s totally over it, or I’m just reading too much into things, or maybe I'm just imagining the whole thing. Who knows.

What about you? How's the dating scene treating you?