Depression... or something else?

Give yourself a challenge...
Hit the gym every single day... do some cardio, like the StairMaster, a stationary bike, whatever...

And do it daily... but I'm not saying you should go all out or try to break any records...
Just check back in on the forum in a month...

Man, boxing actually sounds pretty intriguing...

But look, I’m just not built like that...

I’d much rather hit up a high-end spa for some wellness treatment... instead of dealing with therapists, pills, and all that other crap... plus, I'd probably roll a joint while I'm at it.

Just pure, unadulterated hedonism, you know? 👍

First things first though, I need to find a job... I'm really curious to see what's out there and where the opportunities are... any suggestions?
I'm pretty good at communication, math, IT (both software and hardware), and I play guitar. Plus, I'm fit enough to handle a heavy physical grind if needed / I've got a decent look.

Look, you’re seriously gambling with your health here. You need to go see a psychiatrist and—this is the important part—just be straight with them! Don't lie. And please, stay far away from any hallucinogens—cannabinoids, nutmeg, whatever—that kind of stuff is dangerous right now. If you're actually dealing with some form of early-onset psychosis, you're just making things way worse for yourself by masking it...
Go get a psychiatric evaluation, but make sure it’s a REAL one, no BS allowed!!!
And don't go playing games with your parents or your doctors. It doesn't help anyone. Sure, lying might feel like an easy out in the moment, but in the long run, you're basically setting yourself up for a total disaster.
Anyway, once you actually know what's going on with your mental health—meaning, once you've finished a legit evaluation—come back and post here so we can actually talk about this. There's no point in doing it like this. On one hand, you're reaching out for help, but on the other, you're totally sabotaging yourself...

Maybe start by heading out for a quick two-day getaway to a spa or somewhere relaxing with someone...

but once you're back, get right back into the gym...
and stay away from any drugs...

At the same time, you should probably start looking for work... but don't just grab any mindless manual labor job, because you'll already be doing enough physical work at the gym... I mean, look for something that actually challenges your brain a bit, you know? Something that gives you a sense of purpose. Having a job really does help with your self-esteem and how you respect yourself...
but yeah, just start doing all this immediately...

Look, Kyle Nelson2 actually gave you some solid advice there. I’m honestly gutted to hear you’re even considering dropping out of college—like, come on, real scholars don't just quit mid-game! 🙂 Honestly, though, if you need to step away, just file for a formal leave of absence. Use this year to actually focus on yourself—get your health back on track and stay clean.

mistyseal11 said:doc, I need help:

- I’ve been feeling totally listless for months, starting somewhere around mid-October 2006.
- My head is constantly racing... like chess... always trying to map out sixteen moves ahead.
- When the adrenaline hits, I feel like I could actually kill someone.
- Most of the time, I'm just taking it out on myself... slamming my head against the wall.
- In those moments, I say the most horrific things, I hallucinate... picturing ways to maim certain people.
- I'm destructively intense. I end up blaming everything on random stuff, like if my neighbor is playing pool with some spineless idiot.
- A constructive outlet would be, I don't know, splitting wood... with an axe.
- I can't stand injustice.
- The government and "the system" are just broken.
- I'm pretty restless.
- And impatient.
- There's this constant internal struggle with all kinds of fears.
- Usually, I'm a quiet guy, but then again, I'm actually pretty popular in my social circles.
- I have some really great friends.
- I am a walking contradiction.
- I want it, but I don't.
- I listen to R&B and psychedelic rock.
- I love those bursts of pure euphoria and positivity, but then there's the psych stuff.
- I have this obsessive need to write, rather than just expressing myself.
- I talk in riddles, jokes, and sarcasm.
- People often take me too lightly, and by the time they realize I was serious, it's usually too late.
- I'm always down for some kind of action.
- As I was typing this... okay, I got a bit worked up, now I'm listening to Foghat and feeling a rush of positivity.
suggestions, comments, thoughts, anything...

any help is appreciated.

ps. I'm 19.

try heroin ☕

amberorca192 said:Look, I’m just gonna say it—don't even go there. Seriously, just stay far away from heroin. It's absolutely not worth it. ☕

Are you kidding me right now?

Can I just grab this at a drugstore, or am I gonna have to go see a doctor and deal with the whole prescription headache first?

mistyseal11 said:seriously?

Can I just grab this at a CVS... or am I gonna need a doctor's prescription first?

I mean, come on, things were way wilder less than a century ago.🤣

http://images.google.com/images?svnum...q=bayer+heroin

The stuff your doctor hands you for depression is ten times worse than horse, but hey, at least it's legal.🙄

amberorca192 said:honestly, the stuff doctors prescribe for depression is ten times more intense than horse, except it’s legal.

Looking for tips & tricks? Just Google "legal highs"... but man, everything just grows wild in the summer, from weeds to nettles to decorative stalks, it's freaking everywhere...

I really can't handle alkaloids... I'm just craving some OL... whether it's THC or even just alcohol... damn... Saturday night and I'm stuck at home... total loser vibes...

Just rotting away here... nothing to do... basically acting like a mushroom...
Gonna go light up a stick and see if it helps... 🤣 😁

man, oh man

bluegull29 said:goodness

I suppose I'll be forever young too...
perhaps even more so than I am now...

hehe.... 😎

🤣

F 43.2 Adolescent crisis (depressive episode with psychotic symptoms)

😎

Elizabeth Allen84 said:indigo!

By the way, this is more of a psychology thing... you should probably head over to those forums; you might actually find something interesting there.
see you!

Honestly, I don't think this even falls under psychology. WHAT YOU REALLY NEED IS JUST SOMEONE TO TALK TO—SOMEONE WHO WILL HAVE AN HONEST, CALM, AND SINCERE CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
Also, have you thought about keeping a journal? Just vent everything onto the paper and you'll feel an immediate sense of relief. It wouldn't hurt to try some creative outlets either; drawing, for instance, is great for settling your nerves, and sometimes a sketch can reveal what's actually going on inside you better than words ever could, whether you want to admit it or not. Give it a shot and let us know how it goes.

Maria Rogers63 said:Drawing really helps settle the nerves—plus, through sketches, you can actually figure out what's bothering you because those emotions just come out, whether you want them to or not.

Once, simply out of boredom, I filled an entire sheet of paper with little marks... sort of... just drawing one after another... random lengths... with a few waves appearing here and there...

As for creativity, I play guitar and improvise constantly... coming up with new riffs and such... I get completely lost in it.

I’d love to try my hand at film if given the chance. Acting suits me quite well... though to make it a viable career, I would need to graduate from a top-tier acting academy—but where does one even find something like that?
...I also have a vision for a screenplay... which could lead to directing something... and so on...

...plus I’ve got this whole vision for a screenplay... maybe even direct the thing myself... things like that.

So, why don't you actually lay out some details about this vision of yours? It sounds pretty interesting.

I guess you might want to start listening to Gou 😁