Home caregiving for the elderly and disabled

I find myself navigating a particularly heavy season right now. My grandmother has returned home from the hospital, but she’s completely immobile and lacks any autonomy—she can’t manage basic daily needs, including using the restroom, let alone being left alone in the house. We’re prepared to step up and tackle whatever challenges lie ahead, which is why I turned to this forum; I was hoping to connect with someone who has walked this path before and might offer some practical wisdom on how to make life a little more manageable for both her and our family. On a separate note, what are your thoughts on assisted living facilities? Is moving her into a private care community a viable solution, or am I missing something?

I was just wondering if anyone here might have some insight. I remember seeing a segment on TV a few years back about those medical alert systems—you know, the kind where an elderly person wears a pendant or a button around their neck, and if they have a fall or an emergency, they press it and a dispatch center immediately sends out paramedics or emergency responders. Does anyone happen to recall the name of a specific company that provides that kind of service?

This is the gadget you’re talking about. It works fine, sure, but honestly? You have to wonder if that person can even manage being on their own with a device like this. Usually, emergency services don't just dispatch someone immediately; they call the resident first. If there's no answer, they reach out to you or whoever else is on the contact list to let them know a wellness check was requested.

http://www.presence.com/device.htm

Publicly funded assisted living facilities are generally better because they're usually right in the heart of the city, so residents can actually get out and go downtown. There's tighter oversight, too, and since more people live there, you actually get a chance to socialize and meet people. Most importantly, though—they're cheaper.

That doesn't mean private facilities are bad, obviously.

Thanks so much for the response; I’ve been scouring the web for this all day. I’ll definitely be leaning toward the community center as our first choice. As for the concept of "presence," I see the device as just one small piece of a much larger mosaic—a tool meant to make life a little easier while we're away from home. Thanks again for the help!

Brian Martin29 said:Thanks so much for the reply; I’ve been scouring the web for this all day. A community center would definitely be my first choice. As for the "presence" aspect—look, the device is just one small piece of the puzzle to help make life a little easier while we're out of the house. Thanks again for the help!

Brian Martin29, I’ve been dealing with similar headaches lately myself, and let me tell you
you can't expect a damn thing from the institutions in this country.
Period. You have to handle everything on your own, using your own family resources and your own cash.
I’ve been running around to various government agencies for a while now trying to look after two very elderly relatives who, thank God, are still mobile.
Everywhere I go, they're perfectly polite, they give me a decent amount of their time,
but I haven't gotten a single actual solution from anyone...
In the end, everyone just tells you: "It'll be easier if you just pay for it privately."
But don't get me wrong, the bureaucracy never sleeps...
My relatives have been in the social services system for years now.
They receive different types of assistance while they wait for a spot in an assisted living facility.
And now, for the third time, they're asking them for a residency certificate (what is that paper even for?!?),
a birth certificate, proof of address. Just a massive list... I mean, why do we even have Social Security numbers if we need all this junk?
Once we finally scrape all this paperwork together, maybe then something will actually happen...
It’s a total disaster....
Anyway, I hope you get your situation sorted out as soon as possible.
As for everyone else on this forum, my advice is to file that application for a community care home
the second your folks hit seventy...
That’s really the only way to ensure they have a decent life in their old age.

I’m considering hiring some in-home help for my mother. Does anyone have recommendations? I’ve been looking into services offered by places like Sunrise Senior Living, $13 maybe just an hour or so at a time. I'd appreciate hearing how others have managed home care for elderly parents. My mom is still mobile, but she's struggling more with cooking and keeping up with the housework. Also, what are the typical costs for assisted living facilities in Chicago for seniors who are still relatively active? Thanks.

boldnomad45 said:I’m thinking about getting some in-home help for my mom. Does anyone have recommendations? For example, I was reading that kind of service is offered by places like Kindred Nursing, $13 per hour, and I’d love to hear how you all handled home care for seniors. My mom is still mobile, but she’s finding it harder and harder to manage the cooking and housework. Also, what are the general prices for assisted living facilities in Chicago for seniors who are still relatively active? Thanks!

Around $1333 a month. Residential facilities are usually somewhere around $2333 depending on the specific location.
Your best bet is to hire a retired nurse. You can find those types of listings easily. There are plenty of people out there who just take the money and do absolutely nothing, but if you go this route, you'll actually get someone who knows what they're doing. The cost really depends on the level of care required, but you're going to have to sit down, call around through various ads, and vet them personally.
If it’s strictly about the cooking, I think it would be much cheaper to arrange for meal delivery services. It doesn't cost a fortune, and she'd have a hot, ready-to-eat meal waiting for her every single day.

Angela Wright said:Roughly $1333 a month. For live-in help, I think prices hover around $2333 depending on the specific needs of the household.
Your best bet is to find a retired nurse. You'll see ads for that. There are plenty of people out there just looking for a handout, but with a nurse, you actually get someone who knows what they're doing. The cost really depends on the level of care required, but you’re going to have to sit down, go through the listings, and call people one by one.
If it's strictly about meals, it might be much cheaper to arrange for meal delivery services. It won't break the bank, and she'll have a hot, prepared meal ready every single day.

She has her pension, so she isn't on welfare, but her mobility is limited, her appetite is low, and sometimes she can't even manage the cooking. Because she lives in her own home and barely makes enough to cover the utilities, she doesn't qualify for any government assistance.
I'm trying to find someone to handle the cleaning and the cooking. I see plenty of local agencies specializing in this, but in a sea of options, it's hard to tell which ones are actually reliable and honest.