Quick question (don't judge me)

Is there any way to run a test to see if I had a minor heart attack about 12 years ago?

Hearts? Sure, you can get an EKG done—but honestly, it might not even pick up any damage at all. You could go for an echocardiogram or maybe some specialized cardiac imaging to see if there’s a specific section that isn't pumping quite right... but then again, those might miss things too. In the middle of an acute heart attack, they can run radionuclide scans using isotopes that track metabolic activity to pinpoint actual damage, though I'm not entirely sure how effective that is once you're dealing with old scarring (probably not much)... but look, all of this—aside from the basic EKG stuff—really needs to be hashed out with a cardiologist, because I'm definitely no expert here...

Maybe someone knows what happened if it wasn't a heart attack: at one point, I felt as if "someone" just exited my body, and I thought my nerves had completely snapped. Basically, after that happened, I lost all self-control. I couldn't handle even the slightest bit of stress anymore; every little thing drove me crazy, like I was having a nervous breakdown. I started whimpering and wailing... this was 12 years ago. People kept telling me I needed to toughen up, that I shouldn't react like that, blah blah, and I just kept repeating that I hadn't been like this before. But people who didn't know me back then just laughed at me... I couldn't even speak in a normal voice anymore because I was halfway whimpering through everything. I felt like a zombie, totally incapable of functioning, but everyone (including psychiatrists) told me I just needed to pull myself together and stop crying (back then, I cried a lot). It was only after several years that I felt one day as if "someone" entered me, like we merged, and since then I haven't been that pathetic, though I'm not quite my old self either. Then just a few months ago—after even more years passed—I felt one evening as if something cold entered my head and stayed there. Since then, I feel completely [blank], and it's terrible to think about how my physical "self" lived all these years. I've lost everything in life, but I can't explain to anyone that it wasn't the real me, just an empty shell. That's how it felt. So, is this some kind of mental illness or is it physical? Because from the start, I felt it wasn't a psychological issue (even though I seemed hysterical and whiny on the outside, internally I was baffled by myself and wanted to slap myself for crying over every little thing, which isn't who I am, but there was no time for thinking; my body just did it, regardless of what I thought). During those first years, I often felt pain in my heart area and took a lot of painkillers, though the pains were more like "overwhelming sensations" than actual physical pain; they felt like that "heavy heart" feeling, but much, much stronger.

I am increasingly convinced that this is a matter for a psychiatrist rather than a cardiologist.

To doesn't feel like a heart issue to me—it feels more like my nerves are acting up.🤷

I guess I was thinking about it because my chest felt heavy, and honestly, I’m still struggling with shortness of breath, especially when I try to be active or play sports. I also just don't have the energy to deal with stress like I used to twelve years ago. What I described happened during those first two or three years after the event, before things settled down—unless maybe it's some kind of spiritual thing. But that's just how I feel. Objectively, it could be some kind of heart attack, though I wouldn't know for sure since I haven't seen a doctor and don't know much about how heart attacks work.