Resources and support for families dealing with cancer and serious illness

Angela Wright said:I hear what you're saying, but then you went and said, "but we definitely have to stick to the harsh statistics," which totally contradicts your first point. That’s how I can tell you're "someone with expertise." Let others deal with the numbers; personally, they don't mean anything to me anymore, just like they shouldn't mean anything to someone who is actually sick. If people want to play with math, let them go kill themselves over calculations instead.🙄 I honestly don't understand why doctors constantly shove these stats in the faces of patients. What, do they think we need extra convincing that we're seriously ill? Just hearing the word "cancer" makes it crystal clear how tough things are—you shouldn't have to dig an even deeper hole for the patient.
I absolutely loathe statistics😠. They are completely useless to those who are suffering.

The only thing that matters is staying grounded in reality—not leaning too far positive or too far negative. Neither extreme helps anyone, and I know that all too well from my own personal battle with cancer.

cosmicsailor91 said:I couldn't agree more with everything said above!
I really wish I could share some good news of my own—my girlfriend just got her Goldman Sachs scan results back and she's totally clear! Thank God!

That's amazing! I love opening up Reddit, scrolling through here, and... finding wonderful news like this.
Yes, thank God, and fingers crossed she stays clear forever!

Maria Jones40 said:The only thing that matters is staying grounded in reality—not leaning too far positive and not spiraling into the negative. Neither extreme helps anyone. I know that firsthand from my own battle with cancer.

I couldn't agree more. Reality is brutal enough without drowning in statistics; you can navigate this much easier by ignoring them. We need to strip away anything that creates even an imaginary problem and focus entirely on ourselves and our own fight. That’s what I learned through my experience with a very aggressive malignancy.

cosmicsailor91 said:I am in total agreement with everything said above!
I wish I could share some good news with you all—my girlfriend just got her Goldman Sachs scintigraphy results back, and she’s as clear as day! Thank God!

🎉

Maria Jones40 said:This is exactly the field I specialize in. While it’s true that every single person stands apart from the numbers, we really can't afford to ignore those broad statistical trends.

I find myself nodding along with Angela Wright regarding how every patient is a unique soul, and how this devastating illness manifests differently in everyone; however, I am also incredibly grateful to Maria Jones40 for providing such a clear, professional breakdown of how the Avast treatment actually works.

Maria Jones40 said:Well, I was actually trying to express that while every individual story is unique—much like how one person might thrive on a specific diet while another struggles—statistics still tell a broader truth, even if we don't always see it clearly at first glance.

I realized I completely forgot to ask Maria Jones40 if it would be alright to reach out via a private message.

Angela Wright said:I absolutely loathe statistics😠. They are completely useless to people who are actually sick
.

I am right there with you, Ivanna! Honestly, stats should be for doctors only—I’d ban them from even mentioning numbers to patients altogether.
In my book, having faith in getting better and staying in a positive environment is what actually matters for recovery.
When my sister was diagnosed with cancer, I went down a total rabbit hole reading every medical paper I could find. It just dragged me straight into a deep depression because there wasn't a single shred of good news in any of it. My heart literally sank when I read her life expectancy was only 1-4 months. (Not that I ever said that to her, obviously).
I finally decided to shut all that out and focus my energy on giving my sister nothing but love, warmth, and support. We talk about health instead of the illness, and we stick to funny, happy stuff... It makes such a massive difference for both of us.🙂

Betty Taylor51 said:I totally forgot to ask Maria Jones40 if it would be okay to send her a private message.

Of course you can!

Hey everyone, and my sincere condolences to anyone who’s lost someone recently.🤷

I’m looking for some info—I swear I read it somewhere on this Reddit thread before, but now I can't for the life of me find where it was buried.

Someone mentioned there's this amazing medication you take after chemo that actually prevents those nasty mouth sores and ulcers from popping up. You know, those miserable little things that seem to be a guaranteed side effect once the chemo kicks in. If anyone remembers the name of that stuff, please let me know.

Thanks in advance!

So, I actually just celebrated my five-year anniversary since my breast cancer surgery the other day 🎉
and now I’m sitting here thinking about everything I want to get up to during my next fifty 😍

love you guys, darkviper5

slyseal28 said:it didn't come through... 🤷

please, send it again...

YOU CERTAINLY GOT IT; you replied to my email... thank you.

AS FOR ME, I RECEIVED MY ID CARD TODAY, so thank you. Just so we're clear, Katherine, feel free to send those materials over. I'll try to coordinate things through my husband and the nursing staff at our hospital out in the Midwest.

darkviper5 said:I actually just celebrated my five-year anniversary since my breast cancer surgery🎉
and now I'm planning out how I'll spend the next fifty years😍

love you guys, Lisa

Happy anniversary to you! That is definitely something worth celebrating!
For those next fifty years, I wish you tons of 🙂😂😍: and...👍

MAJA12

Hey, I'd love to hear from you! How have you been?
Since we're both dealing with ovarian cancer, I was looking back through some old Reddit threads... the last thing I saw about you was from early 2007, when you were heading in for a checkup and feeling super anxious about what your PSA levels might look like.
If you're still lurking here, I'd really love an update on how you're doing...

jadetinker42 said:Hi everyone. I also wanted to send my sincere condolences to anyone who has recently lost a loved one.🤷

I’m looking for some information that I'm sure was mentioned on this thread before, but I can't seem to track down where exactly.

Someone previously mentioned a really great medication used after chemotherapy to help prevent those painful mouth sores and ulcers that almost always pop up during treatment. If anyone remembers the name of it, could you please let me know?

Thanks so much in advance.

It's called User456

Maria Jones40 said:it's called User456

I'm not quite sure if Betty Taylor51 received my second reply. It feels like I might be having some technical glitches with my messaging—I can receive them just fine, but sending seems to be acting up. If she hasn't seen it yet, could she please send me her email address via private message?🤷

Maria Jones40 said:I'm not entirely sure if Betty Taylor51 received my last response; it seems like I’m having a bit of a technical glitch with my messaging settings. I can receive everything just fine, but for some reason, sending them out feels like trying to drive through a heavy fog—everything just stalls. If she hasn't seen it yet, would someone mind dropping their email address in a private message?🤷

I’ve received everything, and I truly can't thank you enough. In fact, I’ve already sent over a few more questions via private message, because honestly, I haven't found anyone else who could provide such detailed, expert answers. Thank God.

Greetings, everyone.
Until chaos strikes, we rarely realize just how much compassion actually exists in this world...

Consider yourselves lucky; you've gained another family standing right there in the front lines with you...

Larry Miller17 said:Hey everyone!
Until things get crazy, we don't even realize how much love there actually is in this world...

You've got another family right here in the trenches with you...

Welcome to the family!
Such a beautiful username, and what a lovely thing to say about love. There's plenty of it for everyone here!

I’ve been reading through everything here intensely for the last few days... Honestly, God, there are so many wonderful, kind people gathered in one place 🙂 🙂

All of this... until recently, it felt like some other, imaginary dimension to me...

But now, it looks like it might soon become my only reality.

How do you stay alive when someone incredibly important is standing right on the edge of your life?

I just want to be a child again. I want to be three years old, sliding down a hill on my dad's skis. For him to hold my hands while Mom takes our picture.

I want to retreat into the past so badly that the present almost ceases to matter. Right now, it really doesn't mean anything at all.

How does one keep going? When do you stop wanting to?
I feel so incredibly sick right now.
Despite having all my healthy organs intact.

Just give them to him.

And please, don't bother answering how to stay alive... That was rhetorical. I'm not particularly interested in a life like this.

Reading through all these threads about cancer and chemo lately, I found myself wishing I could send a message to Zazie.
Then I read that she had passed away.
So I spent hours hysterically scrolling through her posts... and looking at the books she had read...
I don't know if or when I'll have the will to read again, but if I do, I think I'll start with the ones she recommended.
Miss you, Zazie...

And please forgive the dark post; I feel bad leaving sentences like these here... but, honestly, nothing else is coming to mind right now.

Best wishes to everyone.

cosmicridge5 said:I have been reading through your posts quite intensely over the last few days... Goodness, there are such lovely, wonderful people gathered in one single place 🙂 🙂

All of this... until very recently, it felt like some other, imaginary dimension to me...

But now, it seems it will soon become the only one.

How does one remain living, when someone incredibly vital stands upon the precipice of that very life?

I want to be a child again. I want to be three years old, sliding down a slope on my father's skis. For him to hold my hands, while my mother takes our picture.

I want to return to the past so infinitely that my present means almost nothing at all. Right now, it means absolutely nothing.

How does one stay alive? When does one stop wanting to?
I feel so profoundly sick right now.
Despite all my healthy organs.

Just give them to him.

And you do not need to answer me regarding how to stay alive... That was rhetorical. I am not particularly interested in a life like this.

Reading through all the threads about cancer and chemotherapy lately, I found myself most desperately wishing I could send a message to Zazie.
Only to read that she has passed away.
So I spent hours hysterically scrolling through the posts she wrote... and noting the books she read...
I do not know if or when I will find the will to read again, but if I do, I shall begin with those she recommended.
Sending you a kiss, Zazie...

And please forgive me for this dark post; I feel terrible leaving such sentences here... but, currently, nothing else comes to my fingertips...

Greetings and best wishes to everyone.

It is difficult to find the strength to resist the gloom and the heaviness of thought, and one cannot blame you for a post like this. Unfortunately, one cannot simply gift their health to another, nor can one just extend a life like that. What you can do is provide immeasurable support and strengthen the person who is fighting to stay among us for as long as possible. I hope tomorrow brings you more optimistic thoughts and a new, different kind of will, so that your near future might be filled with unforgettable moments! One cannot and must not return to the past; life unfolds in the present—so live it today!

Kisses, and hang in there!

cosmicridge5 said:I’ve been reading through your threads intensely for the last few days... My God, there are just so many kind, wonderful souls gathered in one single place. 🙂 🙂

All of this... until very recently, it felt like some distant, imaginary dimension to me...

But now, it seems as though it will soon become my only reality.

How does one maintain the will to live when someone incredibly vital stands right on the precipice of existence?

I yearn to be a child again. I want to be three years old, sliding down a snowy hill on my dad's skis. I want him to hold my hands while Mom takes our picture.

I want to retreat into the past so desperately that my present moment carries almost no weight. Right now, it carries absolutely nothing.

How do you stay alive? Is it when you finally stop wanting to?
I feel an infinite, crushing nausea.
Despite all my healthy organs functioning perfectly fine.

Just give them to him.

And please, don't bother answering how to stay alive... That was rhetorical. I have very little interest in a life like this.

While reading all these discussions about cancer and chemotherapy lately, my strongest impulse was to send a message to Zazie.
Then I read that she passed away.
So I spent hours hysterically scrolling through her posts... and noting down the books she used to read...
I don't know if or when I will find the strength to read again, but if I do, I will start with the ones she recommended.
Sending you love, Zazie...

And please forgive me for such a dark post; I feel terrible leaving sentences like these here... but, quite frankly, nothing else comes to mind right now.

My regards and best wishes to everyone.

It appears that for most of us here, that carefree era under our parents' protection has already passed... now we enter the second act... the part of life that forces us to become adults who actually understand the nature of problems and burdens, and learn to carry them... the world keeps spinning regardless... with some people or without them... unfortunately... I wish my father would still give me a quick hug before school and fix my hair, and that my mother would call just to ask if I need anything from the garden, giving me the chance to tell her everything that made me smile or made me sad that day...