Thoughts on the terrible moderation over at ex anais

rustydrifter10 said:Sometimes things get pulled immediately, sure. But the real idea here is that moderators aren't just robots programmed to delete every single little bit of off-topic chatter; they actually use their judgment to decide if something can stay. Plus, you really shouldn't let off-topic stuff slide if it's clearly just meant to be provocative.

Well, my post wasn't trying to provoke anyone. Especially since it was a direct response to someone who had already set themselves up with this incredibly rigid, "us vs. them" attitude toward non-smokers.

On another note, there's one thing that strikes me as... well... a bit ridiculous. On one hand, you guys are busy deleting benign little comments just because they might be perceived as a provocation. But then, on the other hand, when someone starts a thread about a personal struggle, you often let these absolutely brutal comments fly at the author. Look, I'm fine with the latter—honestly, I hate it when people are treated like they're made of glass, and let's be clear, this forum isn't some therapy support group—but then it makes no sense why there's such intense fear regarding the first part. Let's emphasize those words: "perceived" and "potential." I'm telling you, people aren't made of paper.

A troll—now that's a provocation, clearly. That's a different story altogether.

Steven Chavez2 said:I'm with you on that.

Generally speaking, one of the reasons (aside from the fact that I have way too much going on in my actual life to get sucked into endless internet debates) that I don't enjoy posting here is this overly rigid approach to moderation. Look, I get it. You have to penalize blatant insults, doxxing, advertising, spam, or bot garbage. That makes sense.

But when someone starts hovering over you like a hawk, throwing warnings and threatening bans like they're wielding a stick, just because you thought a post was funny and responded with a laughing emoji? That is, quite frankly, nothing more than mindless authoritarianism. What’s the big deal? Someone says something, you find it funny, you drop an emoji. It’s not rocket science. Online discussions are supposed to mirror real life, where someone says something and the other person just laughs. Or am I supposed to write out, "Haha, yes, I find your comment incredibly witty, I also ________ (insert whatever the author said here)." Give me a break. It's ridiculous.

On the flip side, I actually agree with the mods that off-topic clutter should be cleared out. If the thread is about a favorite craft beer, there’s no reason to pivot into a debate about fuel efficiency in a Ford F-150. But, if the topic is about a conflict between a non-smoker and her boyfriend who smokes, and the conversation drifts toward the broader dynamic between smokers and non-smokers, then you really ought to show some flexibility. Looking at the bigger picture can actually help the original poster navigate her specific issue. It’s the same logic as how a broad discussion about the pros and cons of Japanese versus German engineering might actually help someone deciding between a Mazda or a BMW.

Bottom line: whenever I come here to type something, I feel like I'm walking on eggshells. Don't get me wrong—I'm not advocating for chaos or lack of etiquette. In fact, I value discipline and order immensely; even digital spaces shouldn't be a free-for-all. But you mods could really benefit from a little more nuance.

I don't have any illusions that this post will change anything, but since this section was created for complaints and feedback regarding moderation, I believe I have a democratic right to voice my opinion—and I think I've done so politely enough. I just hope no one hits me with another infraction because I went off-topic by having boldwalker12 veer into a critique of the entire moderation team instead of sticking to the original point. Yes, there's a bit of irony in that. Life happens everywhere, including on internet forums.

Best regards. 🙂

Wrong.
That kind of stuff isn't even penalized on Reddit.

Steven Chavez2 said:Well, my post wasn't trying to provoke anyone. Especially since it was a direct response to someone who had already set themselves up with this incredibly rigid, "us vs. them" attitude toward non-smokers.

On another note, there's one thing that strikes me as... well... a bit ridiculous. On one hand, you guys are busy deleting benign little comments just because they might be perceived as a provocation. But then, on the other hand, when someone starts a thread about a personal struggle, you often let these absolutely brutal comments fly at the author. Look, I'm fine with the latter—honestly, I hate it when people are treated like they're made of glass, and let's be clear, this forum isn't some therapy support group—but then it makes no sense why there's such intense fear regarding the first part. Let's emphasize those words: "perceived" and "potential." I'm telling you, people aren't made of paper.

A troll—now that's a provocation, clearly. That's a different story altogether.

I’m honestly not even sure which post you’re referring to—I was just speaking in general terms! If you really want to lodge a complaint about a specific post being taken down, please just give me a bit more detail so I can dig into it and see what actually happened.

Steven Chavez2 said:Well, my post wasn't trying to provoke anyone. Especially since it was a direct response to someone who had already set themselves up with this incredibly rigid, "us vs. them" attitude toward non-smokers.

On another note, there's one thing that strikes me as... well... a bit ridiculous. On one hand, you guys are busy deleting benign little comments just because they might be perceived as a provocation. But then, on the other hand, when someone starts a thread about a personal struggle, you often let these absolutely brutal comments fly at the author. Look, I'm fine with the latter—honestly, I hate it when people are treated like they're made of glass, and let's be clear, this forum isn't some therapy support group—but then it makes no sense why there's such intense fear regarding the first part. Let's emphasize those words: "perceived" and "potential." I'm telling you, people aren't made of paper.

A troll—now that's a provocation, clearly. That's a different story altogether.

Like I said before, as long as nobody starts getting insulting and everything stays within the rules, I'm all for letting things flow!

Steven Chavez2 said:Well, my post wasn't trying to provoke anyone. Especially since it was a direct response to someone who had already set themselves up with this incredibly rigid, "us vs. them" attitude toward non-smokers.

On another note, there's one thing that strikes me as... well... a bit ridiculous. On one hand, you guys are busy deleting benign little comments just because they might be perceived as a provocation. But then, on the other hand, when someone starts a thread about a personal struggle, you often let these absolutely brutal comments fly at the author. Look, I'm fine with the latter—honestly, I hate it when people are treated like they're made of glass, and let's be clear, this forum isn't some therapy support group—but then it makes no sense why there's such intense fear regarding the first part. Let's emphasize those words: "perceived" and "potential." I'm telling you, people aren't made of paper.

A troll—now that's a provocation, clearly. That's a different story altogether.

Look, I’m not trying to be difficult here. If the post stays on-topic and actually adds something useful to the conversation, then by all means, let it fly. But if it's just some massive, unnecessary drama bomb that doesn't serve any purpose and is totally redundant? Then there's really no reason to leave it up on the thread.

amberskipper3 said:Wrong.
That kind of stuff isn't even penalized on Reddit.

Look, posting someone's private information is definitely a violation. If you ever spot any personal data being leaked anywhere on the forum, just report it immediately.

Carol Johnson4 said:Back when I was a moderator on the unknown forum, I had to tell users multiple times to skip threads that were just "dumping nonsense meant to insult their intelligence," to use your words. I don't find any of this funny. If you think a thread is just trolling, why even bother wasting your time on it? 🤷

Spamming a few posts to try and prove some "absolute truth" isn't going to help the discussion, and I don't see the point in it. Plus, it just drives the whole thing off-topic.

I won't lecture anyone on how to spend their time online—if a topic is sitting right there at the top of the feed, you're going to click it...

I certainly support moderation when a thread starter gets branded a troll right out of the gate. I'm definitely not a fan of that paranoid hunting for anonymous handles.

But, once a thread hits a certain length and devolves into pure nonsense—just total fantasy, weird turnarounds, and impossible missions—why should the server even host it?

There’s no actual substance or real discussion left; it’s just a string of penalties and stupidity... and honestly, it isn't even funny anymore.

Steven Chavez2 said:Well, my post wasn't trying to provoke anyone. Especially since it was a direct response to someone who had already set themselves up with this incredibly rigid, "us vs. them" attitude toward non-smokers.

On another note, there's one thing that strikes me as... well... a bit ridiculous. On one hand, you guys are busy deleting benign little comments just because they might be perceived as a provocation. But then, on the other hand, when someone starts a thread about a personal struggle, you often let these absolutely brutal comments fly at the author. Look, I'm fine with the latter—honestly, I hate it when people are treated like they're made of glass, and let's be clear, this forum isn't some therapy support group—but then it makes no sense why there's such intense fear regarding the first part. Let's emphasize those words: "perceived" and "potential." I'm telling you, people aren't made of paper.

A troll—now that's a provocation, clearly. That's a different story altogether.

Sorry, but your post was pretty disgusting toward smokers. And if that thread kept going, it probably would've just turned into a nonstop barrage of insults aimed at smokers (which doesn't belong here).

Just so we're clear, users who were insulting non-smokers got warned too, so there's no confusion there.

And just a quick reminder, you wrote that post after a moderator asked you to stay on topic, since smokers in general aren't what this thread is about.

So yeah. That's that.

Jacob Sullivan91 said:Sorry, but your post was pretty disgusting toward smokers. And if that thread kept going, it probably would've just turned into a nonstop barrage of insults aimed at smokers (which doesn't belong here).

Just so we're clear, users who were insulting non-smokers got warned too, so there's no confusion there.

And just a quick reminder, you wrote that post after a moderator asked you to stay on topic, since smokers in general aren't what this thread is about.

So yeah. That's that.

And let’s be real—Nerini’s views are just as insulting to non-smokers. She basically treats everyone else like second-class citizens who exist solely to cater to her addiction. By her logic, you should probably even let her smoke in your own damn house just so Her Majesty doesn't feel slighted. That isn't "health consciousness," it's pure selfishness.

But hey, her takes are considered totally kosher because she doesn't use any bad words, right?

With all due respect, I think you guys have fallen straight into the political correctness trap.

Best,

Since (that absolutely terrible, awful, subpar, mediocre, whatever 🤦boldwalker12>>) has stepped down from her moderation duties, I honestly feel it would be only polite to either rename this thread or just shut it down entirely.

Steven Chavez2 said:And let’s be real—Nerini’s views are just as insulting to non-smokers. She basically treats everyone else like second-class citizens who exist solely to cater to her addiction. By her logic, you should probably even let her smoke in your own damn house just so Her Majesty doesn't feel slighted. That isn't "health consciousness," it's pure selfishness.

But hey, her takes are considered totally kosher because she doesn't use any bad words, right?

With all due respect, I think you guys have fallen straight into the political correctness trap.

Best,

You claimed your post was deleted for no reason, but I literally gave you the reason. And maybe—just a thought—try actually reading the PDF rules if you aren't trying to be a total pain...

Man, I'm bummed she stepped down from her mod gig.. she was honestly such a killer moderator.

Nicholas King said:Since (that absolutely terrible, awful, subpar, mediocre, whatever 🤦boldwalker12>>) has stepped down from her moderation duties, I honestly feel it would be only polite to either rename this thread or just shut it down entirely.

Honestly, everything that needed to be addressed has been covered, so locking the thread seems like the smartest move to me. 🙂

Gary Cox2 said:Man, I'm bummed she stepped down from her mod gig.. she was honestly such a killer moderator.

I feel the same way; I really hope she decides to come back to us.