now what?!!!

goldensurfer3 said:we've decided to definitely keep the baby because our OB-GYN mentioned this could be my first and last pregnancy... he won't guarantee anything else...
but now there's a whole different issue
HOW DO I TELL MY PARENTS?
GIVE ME SOME SUGGESTIONS...
;(

That was my absolute nightmare. I had a few finals left to finish, plus I had just broken up with the guy I have the kid with. Usually, parents just catch you by surprise in those situations. I went home for a weekend and just told them, "I'm pregnant; I know you'll think I'm crazy, but I want this baby." They were supportive through everything, even though our relationship has always been a disaster (and still is). That phase of my life, they were there, looking out for me and helping until I got a job. Mind you, I had the option to sign up immediately as a domestic worker back then, so I paid into my own benefits for three months and then took maternity leave, which meant I was receiving $533 from then until the kid's first birthday, so I wasn't totally broke. Maybe there's still some loophole in the law if they haven't patched it up yet. And honey, listen, he needs to find a job ASAP 🙂

sretno, and believe me, it's an incredible feeling. It's something you'll always be glad you did, even if you hit a rough patch with money or whatever 🙂 Everything else fades away, things always work themselves out somehow, and the baby (or babies, in your case) will fill your life with more love than you can even imagine right now 🙂

👋

There’s still a loophole available, so I definitely plan on taking advantage of it—though I’ve heard rumors that even as a full-time student, you might be eligible for maternity benefits (I really need to look into the specifics of that)...
I’m going to have the conversation with them today... but honestly...
my hormones are just all over the place right now, so I'm basically just sitting here moping...
I know there will be support out there... and I know things might get a little heated at first (not that I see much reason for anyone to lose their cool, other than the fact that neither he nor I are working right now, and we don't have a place to live yet... but we can figure all that out eventually)...
Thank you all so much for being so supportive....
It truly makes things feel a bit lighter...
Oh, and I almost forgot... yesterday I told a friend of my mom's that I was pregnant, and she was absolutely overjoyed. It actually made me think, "I wish Mom could react like that".....
It really lifts your spirits when you see how much joy something brings to other people...
But then again...
🙂 👋

I suppose I’m quite happy for you as well, actually. 🙂

Thanks, gentlebear3...
I finally told my parents...
Mom actually asked if I was being serious, and I just stayed quiet at first. She eventually realized her question was totally out of line and asked me to explain myself. How do you even explain that? I just told her she should be happy, and then I just broke down. Through all the tears, I told her that the baby's heart is already beating—it’s like this steady, rhythmic thumping.
Dad didn't say a single word; he just pulled me into a huge hug...
They're still pretty much in shock...
So...
I guess that's just how it goes, right? It feels normal, I suppose...
But honestly, I don't feel any better now that it's out in the open...
I really thought telling them would feel like a weight lifting off my shoulders, but it hasn't. Now, I'm just staying in my room; I'm simply not ready to talk to anyone yet...
👋

Your folks are totally spiraling right now because they feel like they’ve lost their kid—you—and they’re freaking out about what’s next for you. But hey, look on the bright side, your old man gave you a hug, which is huge... don't you feel 🙂

Seriously, don't sweat it. Well, okay, maybe worry about the baby for now, but everything else will eventually fall into place. It’s awesome that your partner is stepping up for you, so just try not to let any of this drama get under your skin... once things settle down, just focus on enjoying being pregnant.

🙂

rustymoose54 said:Do you have any siblings? If so, how old are they?
It might be better if you talk to them first...

I feel like one way to handle this is to sit your parents down for a real, serious conversation—tell them straight up that you've found someone you want to spend your life with and that you've already planned out your future together. The baby just sort of happened along the way 😁

Queen 🙂

goldensurfer3 said:They’re still in total shock...
So...
I guess that's just how things go...
And honestly, I don't feel any better after speaking up...
I thought a weight would be lifted off my shoulders... but it wasn't. Now I'm just hiding in my room; I'm simply not ready to talk to anyone...
👋

It’s going to be fine. 👍
Your mom is just stunned because, to her, you're still a kid (which explains that ridiculous question she asked about "how" 😂). Eventually, your dad will sit her down and explain that his little girl has actually grown up. 🙂

My dad handled it way better than my mom did when I told them... He even took this incredibly heavy situation and turned it into a joke just to mess with Mom... He said he was fine with having grandkids, but he was worried about having to sleep in the same house as the grandma. 😍

granitebadger25 said:He said he’s fine with having grandkids, but he’s worried about having to share a bed with the grandma.😍

🤣 🤣

Things are looking up significantly today...
My honey went over for lunch...
But honestly, last night...
We spent hours just talking, and man, I really needed that soul-searching time...
The only thing my dad asked him was: "Do you love her?" And he didn't blink—he told him straight up that he plans on spending the rest of his life by my side. He said he’s never felt anything like this before, and promised he'd protect and cherish both me and our little peanut...
Everything is okay now...
I can finally be completely honest with my family without feeling like I have to put on an act. I can tell them if I can't eat because I'm nauseous, or if my heartburn is acting up...
😉
It's all going to be fine....
Thanks again, everyone!

🙂 👍 I guess everything just ended up where it was supposed to be anyway 👋

Well, isn't that just lovely. My congratulations—stay strong out there.

🙂

... just wanted to jump in and say congrats! :klap:

Here’s a little update from my side...
First off, thank you all so much for the kind wishes...
But, well, it looks like I’m facing some issues again...
Just typical pregnancy stuff, I suppose...
Total bloating!!!!
Man...
It's been going on for a week now....
My stomach feels just like someone who's four or five months along....
It's rock hard...

goldensurfer3, seriously, you should probably head over to the parenting subreddits or find one of those dedicated pregnancy and newborn forums instead. Honestly, if you’re worried about constipation, just grab some prune juice—it works wonders. Or better yet, throw a few dried prunes in a glass of water overnight, drink the water first thing in the morning, and then eat the fruit. It’s a lifesaver. Also, load up on fiber; throwing some flaxseeds into your yogurt helps a ton. Don't mess around with this, because hemorrhoids are absolute hell, no joke.
Congrats, by the way—you didn't make a mistake in your decision at all. Just enjoy the ride, everything will figure itself out as you go.👍

Hey everyone, I just had to drop in and let you all know... I'M EXPECTING TWINS!!!!!
Things have been a little rocky lately, but I'm staying positive and hoping for the best...
👋

Life really does have a way of throwing curveballs at you, doesn't it?😉
First, there was the thought of an abortion—then the decision to go through with it—and now, you're looking at twins. 😍
It’s as if those babies just decided they were coming regardless.😁
sretno 😘

I’m with Justin Gonzalez87 on this one—those two really went above and beyond🙂

sretno👍

goldensurfer3 said:now what?!!!
When you find yourself facing an unplanned pregnancy, the very last thing you feel capable of doing is... think.
So... I need some help here...
I don't need a lecture or anyone telling me how I could have let this happen or why I wasn't more careful (I'm sure there will be plenty of those comments)... but...
Here is the situation...
My boyfriend is 25; he’s got eight exams left plus his thesis, and he isn't working right now.
I'm 24; I still have four exams and my thesis to go, and I'm not working either.
We've been together for three months; we never fight, and we’ve already talked about our future. We are certain we want to spend our lives together because it feels like what we've been waiting for our whole lives.
The reality of our current situation: both of us are unemployed, we have nowhere of our own to live, and I am pregnant.
My thoughts:
1. Getting an abortion. (I'm curious, but I'd really appreciate hearing from people who actually have experience with this or are qualified to speak on it: what are the chances that everything will be fine later on? Will I be able to get pregnant normally and carry a baby to term? From what I've seen, all the girls I know who had abortions are struggling to conceive now, or they barely manage to make it to seven months with a pregnancy.)
2. Telling our parents. (Man... talk about a shock...) But I truly believe they will stand by me. They have never turned their backs on us, so I don't think they'll start now. If we can find a way for both him and me to get jobs as soon as possible, we could rent an apartment, move out of our parents' houses, and start our new life. We would focus entirely on this and give up the partying, the traveling, and the going out...
I always imagined I’d have my life figured out by now—finish college, land a career, travel, and just enjoy ourselves for a year or two... but instead...

Well, I ended up pregnant with my first one three years ago despite all the chaos—didn't abort, and I have zero regrets. How could I? I have a beautiful little girl who I love more than anything. Then, four months ago, I got pregnant again and now I'm waiting on a baby boy. We still travel, I'm studying business and passing all my exams on time, and my husband worked his way up to a manager position by age 25... Our kids are hands down the best thing that ever happened to us, and they've never "gotten in the way" of our plans or goals. Of course, we have the grandparents and daycare helping out too. bdw—we were exactly that age when we started.👍

gentleharbor86 said:Well, I ended up pregnant with my first one three years ago despite all the chaos—didn't abort, and I have zero regrets. How could I? I have a beautiful little girl who I love more than anything. Then, four months ago, I got pregnant again and now I'm waiting on a baby boy. We still travel, I'm studying business and passing all my exams on time, and my husband worked his way up to a manager position by age 25... Our kids are hands down the best thing that ever happened to us, and they've never "gotten in the way" of our plans or goals. Of course, we have the grandparents and daycare helping out too. bdw—we were exactly that age when we started.👍

Honestly, she could have gone through four whole pregnancies and miscarried four times over just waiting for you to finally type out an answer... 😁

Look, please don't go digging up ancient threads like that. Besides, this really falls under the category of women's health.

🙂