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NEW: Support group forming for people with social anxiety

Started by Douglas Phillips7 · · 👁 5 views · 21 replies

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Participants Douglas Phillips7Donna White50restlesstiger49analogviper9Austin Kim73Brian Palmer6dustytinker52Larry Palmer5mistyseal11analogangler8
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#1 ·
Calling all social anxiety warriors!!!

I’m looking to put together a small group here in Chicago—about ten people—to dive into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The goal is to meet up, share our personal stories, hang out, and actually work through CBT techniques together. This whole idea was sparked by a forum member, "tns"! Huge thanks to tns for suggesting this; we desperately need more groups like this. There are way too many people struggling with social phobia; it quietly devours us, one massive bite at a time.

According to the literature on how to most effectively apply CBT for social phobia, working in a group setting is absolutely essential for achieving optimal treatment and the best possible results.
For those who aren't familiar, the book I'm referencing is "Overcoming social anxiety : step by step" by Dr. Thomas Richards. Here is a link to an English version if you want to check it out:

If you're interested, shoot me a private message!
Let's crush this SFobi once and for all!
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#2 ·
Here is my previous post on this topic if you want to dive a bit deeper:
Donna White50 Donna White50 Regular
342 messages
joined Jan 2018
#3 ·
Douglas Phillips7 said:Here is my previous post on this topic if you want to dive a bit deeper:

Zero response so far, what a bummer...😢

Just a heads-up—if you’re actually thinking about starting a group, you really need a psychiatrist running the show. It works just like real life, honestly... everyone falls into their own little roles. You’ll end up with those dominant personalities doing all the talking while everyone else just sits there watching and staying quiet. You need someone there to moderate the vibe, guide the conversation, and help pull out all that buried fear, aggression, or anger... someone to actually push you toward making a change...

Trying to grab coffee with a group where everyone's actually opening up? Man, that’s a tough nut to crack when you're all strangers... It usually takes months of hanging out in a group setting before people finally feel safe enough to get real and talk about their private lives. You just can't manufacture that kind of trust over a quick latte—there's zero chance of it happening that fast... even if the vibe of meeting people who've been through the same stuff is definitely worth it...
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#4 ·
Donna White50 said:Zero response so far, what a bummer...😢

Just a heads-up—if you’re actually thinking about starting a group, you really need a psychiatrist running the show. It works just like real life, honestly... everyone falls into their own little roles. You’ll end up with those dominant personalities doing all the talking while everyone else just sits there watching and staying quiet. You need someone there to moderate the vibe, guide the conversation, and help pull out all that buried fear, aggression, or anger... someone to actually push you toward making a change...

Trying to grab coffee with a group where everyone's actually opening up? Man, that’s a tough nut to crack when you're all strangers... It usually takes months of hanging out in a group setting before people finally feel safe enough to get real and talk about their private lives. You just can't manufacture that kind of trust over a quick latte—there's zero chance of it happening that fast... even if the vibe of meeting people who've been through the same stuff is definitely worth it...

Hmm.. you didn't get any interest? Because I already have two people interested right here.
And you don't necessarily need a psychiatrist; this type of therapy was originally designed to be used independently. So, look at this as mere support to make sure no one gives up too early and to give us a chance to socialize a bit. As for those "dominant" types, they deal with the exact same issues and would surely have the empathy and willingness to help others. There's no need to dig deep, force anything, or overcomplicate things. This isn't meant to be a replacement for medical treatment.
Donna White50 Donna White50 Regular
342 messages
joined Jan 2018
#5 ·
Douglas Phillips7 said:Hmm.. you didn't get any interest? Because I already have two people interested right here.
And you don't necessarily need a psychiatrist; this type of therapy was originally designed to be used independently. So, look at this as mere support to make sure no one gives up too early and to give us a chance to socialize a bit. As for those "dominant" types, they deal with the exact same issues and would surely have the empathy and willingness to help others. There's no need to dig deep, force anything, or overcomplicate things. This isn't meant to be a replacement for medical treatment.

Look, if we're talking about a friendly, honest chat over coffee to swap stories, then yeah, that's great. Talking to others helps you realize you're not alone in your struggles, and you can pick up tips on how people handled their own fears... But for the more serious work, you really need someone to show you a different path, point out where your behavior might be tripping you up, and keep the group dynamic moving forward...
Either way, hanging out like that is a good thing and I'm all for it...👍
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#6 ·
Spot on! Thanks so much for having my back! 🙂
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#7 ·
Right now, we have four people on board! And we’re just getting started... 👍
restlesstiger49 restlesstiger49 Regular
271 messages
joined Jul 2012
#8 ·
Donna White50 said:Zero response so far, what a bummer...😢

Just a heads-up—if you’re actually thinking about starting a group, you really need a psychiatrist running the show. It works just like real life, honestly... everyone falls into their own little roles. You’ll end up with those dominant personalities doing all the talking while everyone else just sits there watching and staying quiet. You need someone there to moderate the vibe, guide the conversation, and help pull out all that buried fear, aggression, or anger... someone to actually push you toward making a change...

Trying to grab coffee with a group where everyone's actually opening up? Man, that’s a tough nut to crack when you're all strangers... It usually takes months of hanging out in a group setting before people finally feel safe enough to get real and talk about their private lives. You just can't manufacture that kind of trust over a quick latte—there's zero chance of it happening that fast... even if the vibe of meeting people who've been through the same stuff is definitely worth it...

I disagree. Honestly, being surrounded by people facing the exact same struggles can be incredibly uplifting. 🙂
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#9 ·
...there are only six of us left! things are moving fast 🙂 we still have some room!
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#10 ·
Our first meeting is officially on the calendar for next week! There are currently eight of us signed up, but we still have a few spots left if you want to jump in 😉
analogviper9 analogviper9 Member
38 messages
joined Sep 2017
#11 ·
Douglas Phillips7 said:Calling all social anxiety warriors!!!

I’m looking to put together a small group here in Chicago—about ten people—to dive into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The goal is to meet up, share our personal stories, hang out, and actually work through CBT techniques together. This whole idea was sparked by a forum member, "tns"! Huge thanks to tns for suggesting this; we desperately need more groups like this. There are way too many people struggling with social phobia; it quietly devours us, one massive bite at a time.

According to the literature on how to most effectively apply CBT for social phobia, working in a group setting is absolutely essential for achieving optimal treatment and the best possible results.
For those who aren't familiar, the book I'm referencing is "Overcoming social anxiety : step by step" by Dr. Thomas Richards. Here is a link to an English version if you want to check it out:

If you're interested, shoot me a private message!
Let's crush this SFobi once and for all!

I really love the idea, but I don't personally struggle with social anxiety.
I tend to have a strong animosity toward certain types of people—does that count as being part of this group😁?
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#12 ·
analogviper9 said:I really love the idea, but I don't personally struggle with social anxiety.
I tend to have a strong animosity toward certain types of people—does that count as being part of this group😁?

Not exactly, at least not directly. 😉
analogviper9 analogviper9 Member
38 messages
joined Sep 2017
#13 ·
Douglas Phillips7 said:Calling all social anxiety warriors!!!

I’m looking to put together a small group here in Chicago—about ten people—to dive into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The goal is to meet up, share our personal stories, hang out, and actually work through CBT techniques together. This whole idea was sparked by a forum member, "tns"! Huge thanks to tns for suggesting this; we desperately need more groups like this. There are way too many people struggling with social phobia; it quietly devours us, one massive bite at a time.

According to the literature on how to most effectively apply CBT for social phobia, working in a group setting is absolutely essential for achieving optimal treatment and the best possible results.
For those who aren't familiar, the book I'm referencing is "Overcoming social anxiety : step by step" by Dr. Thomas Richards. Here is a link to an English version if you want to check it out:

If you're interested, shoot me a private message!
Let's crush this SFobi once and for all!

So, what exactly is eating away at you? Give me some details—describe those specific situations or give me an example.🙂
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#14 ·
We held our very first meetup today. :klap: Everyone got introduced, grabbed some coffee, and shared a bit about their own journeys. Everything went exactly as we had hoped it would. Honestly, guys, it’s really not as intimidating as it seems! I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who found the courage to show up. You all are amazing! We are still looking for a few more members to join us, so if you're interested, please reach out!
Austin Kim73 Austin Kim73 Newcomer
7 messages
joined Feb 2016
#15 ·
Nice work 😢. If you guys run into more of this stuff, let me know and I'll drop in. I’ve already wrestled my own share of this mess, and honestly, I wouldn't mind sharing what I learned along the way.
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#16 ·
So, one meeting finally happened. If there's another one down the road, I won't be attending. Still, I'm honestly glad I managed to stick it out long enough to see this gathering actually take place. To me, that feels like a real victory, even if it seems minor to others. Everyone, please, just keep pushing. It is possible—you just have to try not to overthink the outcomes or get lost in the "what ifs" of everything. I've just come to realize that all of this was essentially my own subconscious cry for help, something a certain person helped me see. That was probably the biggest breakthrough for me: finally admitting to myself and accepting that I have an issue, rather than constantly pointing fingers at everyone else for how I feel.

I want to say thanks again to everyone who backed this idea!
Brian Palmer6 Brian Palmer6 Member
10 messages
joined Dec 2019
#17 ·
Sorry I'm running a bit behind—but I honestly think it’s such a great idea for us to support one another and learn from everyone's different experiences. If we end up having more of these meetings, I'm definitely in. 🙂
dustytinker52 dustytinker52 Member
20 messages
joined Feb 2017
#18 ·
I’m all for getting something like this off the ground, and I'm definitely down for Miami... so if anyone is interested, just shoot me a DM.👍
Douglas Phillips7 Douglas Phillips7 MemberOP
11 messages
joined Jan 2016
#19 ·
I’m thrilled to see this idea gaining such incredible momentum! We’re already getting inquiries coming in from Seattle, too, so we definitely need someone on board to handle the logistics 🙂
Larry Palmer5 Larry Palmer5 Newcomer
1 message
joined May 2016
#20 ·
Douglas Phillips7 said:I’m thrilled to see this idea gaining such incredible momentum! We’re already getting inquiries coming in from Seattle, too, so we definitely need someone on board to handle the logistics 🙂

Bass, I've been scouring the web to see if there's anything similar going on over in Cleveland. This is such a killer idea 😁 Is anyone else feeling the vibe and down to get together?

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