Glitch or just a scam?

goldenpanther44 said:So, what—all your coworkers are guys and they won't invite you into their group? Just join some clubs or activities like you mentioned; most people there will be single, though they usually just head home to their boyfriends or girlfriends after the session is over... it really depends on how old you are. Once you hit 30, it gets much harder because everyone is already paired up, settled down, and they tend to stick to those established groups.

I'm 28. My job requires me to commute to a different city outside of my hometown, and since there isn't anyone younger than me living in my neck of the woods, it makes socializing outside of work hours pretty tough.

I skimmed the first two sentences

Look, this kind of thing is pretty standard for those of us watching from the sidelines

But honestly, if you're already hitting this point now, man, you're going to have enough life scars by 22 that you'll look like a walking cautionary tale by 26

The only way out is if you've got wealthy parents willing to bankroll you into picking a better path...

Sarah White50 said:Basically, you think it boils down to being a picky eater?
I honestly think this is just the sickness of the Western world. Work, type, hit your responsibilities, sleep. Repeat.
Even in Sweden, which is supposed to be one of the happiest nations out there, it’s the exact same story. They spend most of the year living like that, just counting down the days until their summer or winter vacations, traveling, and then living off those memories for the rest of the year.
- And they have a reputation for being wild when it comes to hookups and casual sex. You go out, find someone, and it's over by next weekend. But if you read their forums, you wouldn't think that's the case at all. They also deal with that "good boy/girl" syndrome—you know, the person who doesn't hook up and is basically just as boring as the guy who does. They probably struggle with different issues than we do—maybe financially—but socially, we're dealing with the same stuff. Plus, they seem way more detached, which just makes their loneliness even worse.

- My day looks exactly like the one described above: wake up at 6, get home at 6, cook, grocery shop, clean up, TV, and sleep. Even if there were time to hang out (assuming you skip your responsibilities), the people you'd hang out with would have to skip theirs too. There's no such thing as "hey, let's grab coffee spontaneously." Everything has to be scheduled days or weeks in advance. Around here, the only ones doing that are certain immigrant groups living on welfare. They spend all day on the street, ranting about how Sweden stinks and dreaming up new ways to commit crimes, while the people who actually have no free time are the ones paying their bills and giving them pocket money. I'm not a racist, but it's hard not to feel a certain aversion toward people who have been here for five years or more and haven't even tried to integrate, learn the language, or get a job. Of course, not everyone is like that, but that's often the pattern from that part of the world. 🤷

But wait, are you saying this didn't just start since you moved to a new environment, but it was happening even before that? Adapting to a new culture and setting typically brings these kinds of struggles. Regardless of the specific culture, once you reach a certain age, socialization basically narrows down to your partner and other coupled-up people who already know you or your significant other. In the adult world, socialization starts with your partner. We can talk about it however we want, but that is simply the reality of it.