I can't handle this on my own

I’ve been lurking on this American forum for quite some time now, usually just reading and finding plenty of things to agree with, but today I felt like actually contributing something of my own...

It seems I simply can't stand being alone with my own thoughts. Whenever I try to sit down and study for exams, I find myself retreating into isolation, yet I'm constantly plagued by these nagging distractions; I always seem to find something new to fret over. I suppose I'm not exactly thrilled about being alone, though I know having no social circle isn't the end of the world—it just makes me wonder why I feel so fragile, as if I lack the strength to be content in my own company. When things get heavy, I lose my appetite entirely; it's not that I'm choosing not to eat, I just force myself through it because the nausea is too much to handle. People tell me I look terrible, or that I've become unhealthily thin. There are moments when I feel a bit better, but once the solitude sets back in, everything reverts to the same old pattern. I don't really talk to anyone about it either, mostly because I worry I'll sound ridiculous bringing up these kinds of struggles. My biggest hurdle right now, though, is just trying to stay focused and study for these exams without being stuck in this loop of loneliness and distraction; if I could just figure out how to manage that, things might be different.

When did this all start, and what kind of stuff is actually messing with your head right now?

Look, for the time being, I’d suggest you try keeping a journal—honestly, sometimes just getting those thoughts out of your brain and onto paper can make things feel a little less heavy. Plus, it helps to see everything laid out in front of you so you can look at it more logically and move through it faster. There’s really no point in spinning your wheels over the same exact thoughts every single day, so maybe writing them down will help you finally let go of some of that mental clutter. And hey, talking things out with someone else can help too.

You make a valid point @Nicholas Gonzalez8. Keeping a journal could be a worthwhile endeavor... 🙂

I've been thinking for a little while now that it might actually be worth my time to start documenting things day by day—just listing out what I'm aiming to accomplish and then reflecting on how everything actually played out in the evening.

driftingwolf5 said:I’ve been lurking on this American forum for quite some time now, usually just reading and finding plenty of things to agree with, but today I felt like actually contributing something of my own...

It seems I simply can't stand being alone with my own thoughts. Whenever I try to sit down and study for exams, I find myself retreating into isolation, yet I'm constantly plagued by these nagging distractions; I always seem to find something new to fret over. I suppose I'm not exactly thrilled about being alone, though I know having no social circle isn't the end of the world—it just makes me wonder why I feel so fragile, as if I lack the strength to be content in my own company. When things get heavy, I lose my appetite entirely; it's not that I'm choosing not to eat, I just force myself through it because the nausea is too much to handle. People tell me I look terrible, or that I've become unhealthily thin. There are moments when I feel a bit better, but once the solitude sets back in, everything reverts to the same old pattern. I don't really talk to anyone about it either, mostly because I worry I'll sound ridiculous bringing up these kinds of struggles. My biggest hurdle right now, though, is just trying to stay focused and study for these exams without being stuck in this loop of loneliness and distraction; if I could just figure out how to manage that, things might be different.

Look, I'm gonna give it to you straight—don't take this the wrong way—but these are textbook signs of depression, social anxiety, and mostly, a massive hit to your self-esteem. My best advice? Go talk to a pro, like a therapist or a psychologist...

And don't go thinking it's some huge deal. I know plenty of people who see a therapist regularly because, honestly, we all need someone to actually get us and give us a pat on the back once in a while, right? 🙂

Btw, I'm speaking from experience here. I went through similar stuff and used to dodge the experts because I was like, "I'm not some pathetic loser who needs a doctor"—yeah, I was being an idiot. 😁

Looking back, seeing a professional was one of the smartest moves I ever made. My only regret is that my therapist was married, but hey, I managed to snag her for a coffee under the guise of "saying thanks." 😍

So, heads up: put a smile on, invest in yourself, and your body will follow suit... 🙂

Hope this helps a little...

driftingwolf5 said:I’ve been lurking on this American forum for quite some time now, usually just reading and finding plenty of things to agree with, but today I felt like actually contributing something of my own...

It seems I simply can't stand being alone with my own thoughts. Whenever I try to sit down and study for exams, I find myself retreating into isolation, yet I'm constantly plagued by these nagging distractions; I always seem to find something new to fret over. I suppose I'm not exactly thrilled about being alone, though I know having no social circle isn't the end of the world—it just makes me wonder why I feel so fragile, as if I lack the strength to be content in my own company. When things get heavy, I lose my appetite entirely; it's not that I'm choosing not to eat, I just force myself through it because the nausea is too much to handle. People tell me I look terrible, or that I've become unhealthily thin. There are moments when I feel a bit better, but once the solitude sets back in, everything reverts to the same old pattern. I don't really talk to anyone about it either, mostly because I worry I'll sound ridiculous bringing up these kinds of struggles. My biggest hurdle right now, though, is just trying to stay focused and study for these exams without being stuck in this loop of loneliness and distraction; if I could just figure out how to manage that, things might be different.

Just go outside.😉

.. No, really, there's absolutely no need to thank me.😁

Whether it’s meditation, hitting a yoga class, going for a run, getting a pet, picking up a new hobby, journaling, or even just taking a quick weekend trip—there's so much out there. You could try dating apps like Tinder or Hinge, grab a seasonal job at a beach resort, or dive into some self-help books... honestly, you can try just about anything. One of those things is bound to calm your mind and gently nudge you toward the life you actually want to live. 😉

The real secret? You just have to GET OUT THERE and get involved!

St. John's Wort tea👍

They say having a healthy sex life works wonders.

casualtiger2 said:They say having a healthy sex life works wonders.

That thought crosses my mind quite often, I suppose, though my brain usually derails immediately. I start thinking about how athletes seem to hold some sort of privileged status in society, which then inevitably leads to those cynical comments about how for every one successful pro athlete, there are a hundred more just struggling to make ends meet.😍

For the intellectually innocent among us: consider the ratio of failures to good sex.😁

Goodness... I can feel my sense of humor slowly returning. Thank you for listening. I think I’ll head out while I’m still riding this brief wave of positive vibes.😁

Lawrence Bailey77 said:That thought crosses my mind quite often, I suppose, though my brain usually derails immediately. I start thinking about how athletes seem to hold some sort of privileged status in society, which then inevitably leads to those cynical comments about how for every one successful pro athlete, there are a hundred more just struggling to make ends meet.😍

For the intellectually innocent among us: consider the ratio of failures to good sex.😁

Goodness... I can feel my sense of humor slowly returning. Thank you for listening. I think I’ll head out while I’m still riding this brief wave of positive vibes.😁

hahah you're the man

casualtiger2 said:They say having a healthy sex life works wonders.

So does regular bowel movements.

driftingwolf5 said:I've been thinking for a little while now that it might actually be worth my time to start documenting things day by day—just listing out what I'm aiming to accomplish and then reflecting on how everything actually played out in the evening.

Trust me, you aren't going to make a dime just scrolling through social media or staring at your phone. My first piece of advice? Have a Plan B ready, because trying to make a living this way is an absolute energy drain.

It’s the same deal with guys. Just tune out any thoughts about them... since you haven't found the right one yet and probably won't anytime soon.

Find a career and put all your focus there.

Jeffrey Phillips said:So does regular bowel movements.

Discipline is really just about staying focused and actually hitting your targets.

Though some people get lucky enough to have others force discipline on them. In those cases, you don't even notice their lack of self-control.