A question for the lucky ones

It’s perfectly normal to have desires—you can't exactly exist without them—but you shouldn't get too caught up in the obsession. Even someone retreating to a monastery in rural Montana to meditate still has the desire to reach enlightenment...

Elizabeth Sanchez2 said:It’s perfectly normal to have desires—you can't exactly exist without them—but you shouldn't get too caught up in the obsession. Even someone retreating to a monastery in rural Montana to meditate still has the desire to reach enlightenment...

Exactly.
Obviously, we aren't talking about a total absence of desire as some kind of starting line—that’s just impossible. Rather, as someone progresses spiritually, they eventually reach a point where they don't hold onto any material cravings that would hold them back. Eventually, they realize they don't need specific personal goals anymore; instead, they simply act upon the callings that feel clear to them, fulfilling their inherent purpose. They aren't doing this for themselves, though—they do it for the greater good, specifically for the benefit of others.
The desire for enlightenment isn't one of those "attachments" mentioned in the quote. In fact, a person doesn't even need to have the specific urge or even the concept of what enlightenment is to achieve it. Before you hit that state, you have no way of knowing what it actually feels like. So, you might not even crave "that thing" people call enlightenment—not that you could truly conceptualize it anyway, since true enlightenment exists far beyond the mental grasp of an unenlightened mind.

Seeking spiritual growth isn't some forced obligation that triggers action once a person starts living a desireless life. At that stage, growth becomes completely organic. It’s like a natural law—think of how planets naturally orbit Sun City if they are placed within its gravitational pull. But before reaching that stage, a person has to build up enough momentum through spiritual focus, patience, and discipline. It's like building up speed until you reach a point where development becomes pure inertia. From there, growth happens because it's a natural necessity rather than something driven by external conditions. To put it another way, it takes massive creative effort to reach a position where creativity itself becomes an autonomous need—where it seeks its own expression everywhere.

Elizabeth Sanchez2 said:My question boils down to this: people who can say—without any hesitation—that they’re actually happy. I want to know if there are more of them from the first group or the second... that's all.

I feel happy because I actually have those phases where I'm not—you know? It's a mix. If I was just constantly "on" and happy all the time, then it wouldn't even feel like happiness anymore.

Elizabeth Sanchez2 said:For those of you who claim to be happy 🙂,

do you think it’s because you actually checked off all your big life goals—or is it just because you don't need much to stay satisfied (you know, finding joy in the little things and not letting every minor setback ruin your week)?

In my book, happiness isn't really dictated by what you've accomplished or how much gear you've collected along the way; I honestly believe the root of happiness lies within the individual. If you’re genuinely comfortable in your own skin—meaning you actually understand your own potential and you're constantly putting in the work to live up to that potential in your own way—then that’s what I’d call being truly happy.

Elizabeth Sanchez2 said:For those of you who claim to be happy 🙂,

do you think it’s because you actually checked off all your big life goals—or is it just because you don't need much to stay satisfied (you know, finding joy in the little things and not letting every minor setback ruin your week)?

Personally, I feel like chasing every single desire and milestone just to finally "start" being happy is like trying to fill a bottomless pit.
A truly happy person isn't sitting there thinking, "I'll be happy once I land this promotion" or "I'll be happy when I buy that house," only to immediately move the goalposts to the next thing. Instead, they find happiness within the actual process—the steady climb and the constant work on themselves.
To me, happiness isn't something you can put on layaway. People who keep telling themselves they'll be happy *after* they achieve something specific aren't actually living happy lives right now.

Ultimately, I think happiness is really just a matter of perspective. The people who see the glass as half full tend to have a better time because they view every stumble or setback as a chance to grow. They even find motivation in the struggle itself. Optimists just seem to have it figured out.🤷

Elizabeth Sanchez2 said:For those of you who claim to be happy 🙂,

do you think it’s because you actually checked off all your big life goals—or is it just because you don't need much to stay satisfied (you know, finding joy in the little things and not letting every minor setback ruin your week)?

Happiness is such a personal thing, right? I'm guessing you started this thread because you aren't feeling all that happy lately, so now you're looking for some magic formula from the "lucky" crowd... but honestly, there isn't one.

I've actually got my own little theory on why I feel pretty good and satisfied with life... it’s because I finally figured out who I actually am. I've learned a ton, and I'm still working on it...

Like, for example... so many people grind away at jobs they totally hate just to stack up cash so they can buy stuff later to feel happy. But me? I do what I love first. That makes me happy right now! If some money comes my way, awesome, if not, whatever... usually I don't make a killing doing what I love, but it keeps me smiling, and you can't put a price tag on that kind of feeling. No amount of cold, hard cash can replace that. So yeah, that's one reason why I feel the way I do—there are plenty more reasons, but let's not get bogged down in the details... and if someone looks at my vibe and thinks I'm just "settling for the small stuff" or not sweating the wins and losses too much, then hey, they're not wrong! 😬

I consider myself lucky, mostly because I’ve actually learned how to appreciate what I have. It’s not like I’ve conquered the world or built some massive empire yet. But I have an amazing boyfriend, my grades at NYU are decent (even if I don't exactly love the coursework), I’ve got my freelance gigs, I stay active, I make art, volunteer, hang out with friends... I find my happiness in those little things, which is why I’m actually quite content with my life. Of course, there are bad days—highs and lows, obviously—nothing is ever perfect. Sometimes a win is just finally cleaning my apartment or nailing a new recipe. It’s a mistake to say happiness lives *only* in the small stuff; it’s more about having a balanced perspective on both the tiny wins and the big goals. You take it step by step toward something major, and the satisfaction grows naturally. Big ambitions are endless, and so is the fulfillment they bring. So, you have to find that equilibrium: making progress every day, accepting that you don't know everything despite being surrounded by an infinite flood of information and experience... The glass always looks better half-full rather than half-empty 🙂

People always say happiness is found in the little things for a reason. No degree, house, car, or swimming pool can ever make up for those small moments. Real happiness comes from being able to find joy in the basics, even when life hits you with problems...

brisksailor96 said:I consider myself lucky, mostly because I’ve actually learned how to appreciate what I have. It’s not like I’ve conquered the world or built some massive empire yet. But I have an amazing boyfriend, my grades at NYU are decent (even if I don't exactly love the coursework), I’ve got my freelance gigs, I stay active, I make art, volunteer, hang out with friends... I find my happiness in those little things, which is why I’m actually quite content with my life. Of course, there are bad days—highs and lows, obviously—nothing is ever perfect. Sometimes a win is just finally cleaning my apartment or nailing a new recipe. It’s a mistake to say happiness lives *only* in the small stuff; it’s more about having a balanced perspective on both the tiny wins and the big goals. You take it step by step toward something major, and the satisfaction grows naturally. Big ambitions are endless, and so is the fulfillment they bring. So, you have to find that equilibrium: making progress every day, accepting that you don't know everything despite being surrounded by an infinite flood of information and experience... The glass always looks better half-full rather than half-empty 🙂

Honestly, though? Most of what you just listed aren't even "little things" 🙂