Losing interest in socializing: Is anyone else feeling this?

hey everyone... 🙂

so basically, I’ve been totally losing my ability to socialize lately?? sometimes I just don't have the energy to talk to anyone...
it's happening a lot more often now..

the thing is, I work out on an oil rig... my shift is 12 hours a day solo, so when you do the math, I’m pretty much a hermit for a whole month. by the time I get back home for my days off, I’ve completely lost my social battery...
any tips on how to fix this? quitting isn't really on the table since I need the paycheck.

Maybe it’s not even a bad thing? The real question is where that ["I just can't be bothered.. happens way too often.."] feeling actually comes from. As for being isolated... hmm.. debatable..

ironrider11 said:Maybe it’s not even a bad thing? The real question is where that ["I just can't be bothered.. happens way too often.."] feeling actually comes from. As for being isolated... hmm.. debatable..

..an absolute dream come true... 🤣
The only thing missing is some light sensory deprivation—then he’d really be living the high life. 🤣

Michelle Davis25 said:hey everyone... 🙂

so basically, I’ve been totally losing my ability to socialize lately?? sometimes I just don't have the energy to talk to anyone...
it's happening a lot more often now..

the thing is, I work out on an oil rig... my shift is 12 hours a day solo, so when you do the math, I’m pretty much a hermit for a whole month. by the time I get back home for my days off, I’ve completely lost my social battery...
any tips on how to fix this? quitting isn't really on the table since I need the paycheck.

Must be nice for you...

Can women actually land jobs at that place too?

crimsoncanyon2 said:..an absolute dream come true... 🤣
The only thing missing is some light sensory deprivation—then he’d really be living the high life. 🤣

maybe {better} stimulation instead of deprivation.. 😁

ironrider11 said:maybe {better} stimulation instead of deprivation.. 😁

Ugh, as soon as I see the words MKUltra, I'm instantly fired up.🤣

Michelle Davis25 said:hey everyone... 🙂

so basically, I’ve been totally losing my ability to socialize lately?? sometimes I just don't have the energy to talk to anyone...
it's happening a lot more often now..

the thing is, I work out on an oil rig... my shift is 12 hours a day solo, so when you do the math, I’m pretty much a hermit for a whole month. by the time I get back home for my days off, I’ve completely lost my social battery...
any tips on how to fix this? quitting isn't really on the table since I need the paycheck.

The most important question is: does it actually BOTHER you that you don't feel like chatting with people?
Usually, it becomes a problem if you're young and looking for a partner—and let's be honest, you generally need communication to find one. Assuming, of course, you aren't deaf-mute.😲😁
Also, what are you doing during those other 12 hours on the rig? Surely you have at least 4 hours to socialize, or maybe even chat while working. It seems unlikely that you're stuck entirely alone in a control booth for the full 12-hour stretch.

For a person to engage with others, they either need the energy to do it or a genuine interest in the topic. Try to seek out situations where you actually enjoy the people and the things you're talking about.

I’m feeling the exact same way about wanting to avoid people, even though my job requires me to be around them for eight hours a day 🙄
It used to be different; I was constantly out grabbing coffee, glued to my phone, texting, hopping on Skype—you name it. Now? I don't even have a Facebook account. If someone calls me out of the blue, I’ll cook up any excuse in the book just to get out of it. Honestly, I just don't have the energy. I know deep down that if I keep this up, I’m going to burn through my entire social circle pretty fast, but at this point, I truly couldn't care less 🙂
Maybe it’s just a phase. I really hope so.

I’m starting to get back into chatting again, but not about those topics that just fry your brain,
more like just some casual, lighthearted small talk 😁

crimsoncanyon2 said:I’m starting to get back into chatting again, but not about those topics that just fry your brain,
more like just some casual, lighthearted small talk 😁

From where I’m sitting, that’s pretty much all you ever do on this forum anyway.😬

Lawrence Reyes46 said:From where I’m sitting, that’s pretty much all you ever do on this forum anyway.😬

Honestly, I feel like taking that attitude into my real life too 😍
I'm just totally fed up with being serious all the time—I haven't been paid enough to deal with this level of gravity for a long while now 🤣

Lawrence Reyes46 said:I’m feeling the exact same way about wanting to avoid people, even though my job requires me to be around them for eight hours a day 🙄
It used to be different; I was constantly out grabbing coffee, glued to my phone, texting, hopping on Skype—you name it. Now? I don't even have a Facebook account. If someone calls me out of the blue, I’ll cook up any excuse in the book just to get out of it. Honestly, I just don't have the energy. I know deep down that if I keep this up, I’m going to burn through my entire social circle pretty fast, but at this point, I truly couldn't care less 🙂
Maybe it’s just a phase. I really hope so.

Same here.😢
It's actually starting to get pretty annoying. My girlfriends are getting pissed because I never want to go anywhere. They think I'm being weird, but when they ask what's wrong, I tell them nothing is. And honestly, nothing is. It's just like I'm perpetually exhausted, so talking feels like too much work. Even when I am out with people, I'm barely contributing—my answers are basically just two or three words long. I actually have things I want to say, but I just feel so drained that I end up thinking "it doesn't matter," so I keep it short and move on.🙄 People literally have to pull words out of me like pulling teeth.🙂

Count me in.
I honestly can't stand socializing or wasting breath on mindless small talk.

My absolute dream setup? Total isolation from the rest of the world—just me, a dog or a cat, and my laptop.
In this place I moved to a couple of months ago, I don't know a single soul. The guy I live with finally caught on to the fact that I thrive in solitude, that I only step foot outside when it’s absolutely necessary, and that people generally drive me nuts. Luckily, hardly anyone ever drops by, so it's just me and the dog. As for my cigarettes, I have my own stash, and he handles everything else.
I haven't spoken to anyone from my past life either. There's just no need; I couldn't care less how they're doing or what they're up to, and I definitely don't care about their drama. I used to be everyone's designated listener and the "reliable one" you could always vent to. Now? Honestly, I don't give a damn about any of it.
The beach is only about 50 yards away, but I haven't even gone for a swim yet because there are actually *people* there.
Let’s be real here: I crave solitude and silence. I’ve come to realize I’m pretty much emotionally detached at this point—at the end of the day, I have no one, I have nothing, and I don't want or need anything from anyone.
I feel like the rest of my life is basically just filler... I'm not afraid of anything, and I don't really have any goals left to chase.
What do I do all day? I think. I’ve basically solved the puzzle called life, so now I just spend my time filling in knowledge gaps whenever something piques my interest—like how neurons actually fire or the subtle nuances between different philosophers' perspectives.

That’s why I love this laptop; I’m hoping I can find someone here to actually talk to about something that isn't a weather forecast or a recipe.

If there's one thing I want to tell all of you, it's this: you have a choice!

There is nothing quite like having someone by your side where the silence doesn't feel heavy or awkward. It’s that specific kind of companionship—where you can just sit there, maybe watching some show on Netflix, enjoying the quiet without feeling that desperate need to fill the air with mindless chatter 😁 The problem is, people like that are incredibly hard to find.

Lawrence Reyes46 said:There is nothing quite like having someone by your side where the silence doesn't feel heavy or awkward. It’s that specific kind of companionship—where you can just sit there, maybe watching some show on Netflix, enjoying the quiet without feeling that desperate need to fill the air with mindless chatter 😁 The problem is, people like that are incredibly hard to find.

I’ve never really understood the struggle, honestly. I can be quiet with pretty much anyone—silence rarely feels awkward to me. It actually feels way more uncomfortable having to force a conversation or hunt for things to say.

Melissa Sanchez59 said:I’ve never really understood the struggle, honestly. I can be quiet with pretty much anyone—silence rarely feels awkward to me. It actually feels way more uncomfortable having to force a conversation or hunt for things to say.

Look, I don't have an issue being quiet with certain people either, but I see most people struggling with it, so they overcompensate by forcing small talk. It’s just common sense to most: if you’re hanging out, you usually talk.

Lawrence Reyes46 said:Look, I don't have an issue being quiet with certain people either, but I see most people struggling with it, so they overcompensate by forcing small talk. It’s just common sense to most: if you’re hanging out, you usually talk.

That's true. I actually tend to just say it directly when I notice people getting uncomfortable or commenting on how quiet I am 😁 Like, "Hey, if neither of us has anything to say, there's no reason to feel weird about the silence. We might as well just enjoy the peace if that feels better."

Matthew White4 said:Count me in.
I honestly can't stand socializing or wasting breath on mindless small talk.

My absolute dream setup? Total isolation from the rest of the world—just me, a dog or a cat, and my laptop.
In this place I moved to a couple of months ago, I don't know a single soul. The guy I live with finally caught on to the fact that I thrive in solitude, that I only step foot outside when it’s absolutely necessary, and that people generally drive me nuts. Luckily, hardly anyone ever drops by, so it's just me and the dog. As for my cigarettes, I have my own stash, and he handles everything else.
I haven't spoken to anyone from my past life either. There's just no need; I couldn't care less how they're doing or what they're up to, and I definitely don't care about their drama. I used to be everyone's designated listener and the "reliable one" you could always vent to. Now? Honestly, I don't give a damn about any of it.
The beach is only about 50 yards away, but I haven't even gone for a swim yet because there are actually *people* there.
Let’s be real here: I crave solitude and silence. I’ve come to realize I’m pretty much emotionally detached at this point—at the end of the day, I have no one, I have nothing, and I don't want or need anything from anyone.
I feel like the rest of my life is basically just filler... I'm not afraid of anything, and I don't really have any goals left to chase.
What do I do all day? I think. I’ve basically solved the puzzle called life, so now I just spend my time filling in knowledge gaps whenever something piques my interest—like how neurons actually fire or the subtle nuances between different philosophers' perspectives.

That’s why I love this laptop; I’m hoping I can find someone here to actually talk to about something that isn't a weather forecast or a recipe.

If there's one thing I want to tell all of you, it's this: you have a choice!

I agree.😉
Everyone has the right to structure their life however they see fit.
If someone isn't interested in mindless chatter that drains them, and if they prefer living within their own thoughts and listening to the silence, then why not?
At the end of the day, our lives belong to us, not anyone else. We alone decide what to do with them.
For me, especially after an exhausting day or too much social interaction, I just need quiet and my own thoughts to recharge for the next workday.
Thank God everyone is different and needs different things.
So, I don't think the author should worry about it. Maybe it's just a phase they need to move through...🙂

I honestly think a better title would be—just losing the actual capacity to talk to people...

because if you actually had more time on your hands, you’d probably have the energy to socialize too. It isn't even about losing interest in others, which would be an internal thing, so it wouldn't necessarily cause a real issue...

I went through something similar where I was so burnt out that I didn't even have the strength to answer basic questions. My whole life just became this endless loop of college, work, hitting the gym, and then basically passing out in bed every single night...

The stuff happening around you is what forces you into that state, but you really have to watch out so it doesn't drag on too long, because those external pressures eventually start eating away at everything else...

Alexander Martinez5 said:I honestly think a better title would be—just losing the actual capacity to talk to people...

because if you actually had more time on your hands, you’d probably have the energy to socialize too. It isn't even about losing interest in others, which would be an internal thing, so it wouldn't necessarily cause a real issue...

I went through something similar where I was so burnt out that I didn't even have the strength to answer basic questions. My whole life just became this endless loop of college, work, hitting the gym, and then basically passing out in bed every single night...

The stuff happening around you is what forces you into that state, but you really have to watch out so it doesn't drag on too long, because those external pressures eventually start eating away at everything else...

Exactly.🙂
Working on an offshore oil rig is a beautiful job, in a sense, but it strips away any possibility of creativity, doesn't it? It is just mechanical repetition amidst constant noise and smells... truly unnatural conditions for a human being.
But when money is tight, one is forced to accept whatever is on the table.
In such a scenario, shouldn't one look for ways to extract some sort of positive signal from the circumstances?
In your specific case, I suggest reading.
Books can offer everything that you are losing in your current reality. They can fill that massive void and cultivate your imagination. And isn't dreaming a good thing?
Allow yourself to evaluate, to compare, to create values, to imagine scenarios of critique, and to hold silent discussions within the crowd. That is true wealth.
Over time, you will realize that you possess a genuine interest in certain topics—subjects where you have knowledge, familiarity, and established stances. Almost automatically, you will feel this urge to present your own ideas to others; this deep-seated need to voice your opinion. It isn't about being right, or discrediting someone else, or anything of the sort.
What matters is building and reinforcing a solid stance through the strengthening of the ego.
Otherwise, we are left with the flaw that accompanies all ailments: unstable and incomplete viewpoints.
It is a very simple way to switch to a "different track" and escape stressful situations in time.
By supplementing your knowledge. Sometimes, no matter how grueling a job might be, it offers a stepping stone forward. As I have said before, there are no "big things."
There are only many small things, crafted with a great deal of love.😉