I don't know what to do next...

Kenneth Barnes2 said:Thanks.. 🙂 but I already tried that. I maybe got two or three orders and then nothing. People just don't have the time or the interest in art anymore... And I'm barely charging more than the cost of materials and a little something "for coffee"...

Archaeology and anthropology.

It’s a fascinating field of study, truly—but you really have to keep one thing in mind... if you want to actually make a living out of it here in the States, you must be at the very top of your class. Unfortunately, that seems to be the reality of the job market...

Personally, I would look for a job through the university's student employment office—something like stocking shelves at a CVS or maybe tutoring after classes in Washington, D.C. in the evenings. A dorm would be the perfect housing option for you. You should apply, even if your parents are against it. Perhaps aim for next year if not now.

You will certainly need some extra cash, even just to cover train fare to get to campus, so finding a side hustle is essential. I worked throughout my college years myself.

Kimberly Watson said:It’s a fascinating field of study, truly—but you really have to keep one thing in mind... if you want to actually make a living out of it here in the States, you must be at the very top of your class. Unfortunately, that seems to be the reality of the job market...

I know, and I’m planning on putting in the work. I'm genuinely interested in this... I know I'll enjoy my time at university, and honestly, I think I'll love it once I'm actually out in the workforce too... 🙂

velvetranger16 said:Personally, I would look for a job through the university's student employment office—something like stocking shelves at a CVS or maybe tutoring after classes in Washington, D.C. in the evenings. A dorm would be the perfect housing option for you. You should apply, even if your parents are against it. Perhaps aim for next year if not now.

You will certainly need some extra cash, even just to cover train fare to get to campus, so finding a side hustle is essential. I worked throughout my college years myself.

I’m definitely going to find something once college starts. I had no idea you could actually work while classes are in session...

I’m honestly not certain if you can skip lectures specifically within your major. In my experience, I tended to get my work done during the summer, on weekends, or late at night. For instance, I found that sticking to just the afternoon shifts worked best for me.

I’m not talking about those specific hours during lectures... I mean the whole stretch of time, you know? Like, whenever classes are actually in session and we aren't on break 🙂

Kenneth Barnes2 said:So... here's the situation.
I'm 19, just finished high school, and I just started college, which I was actually really excited about. I live out in the sticks near the city, but close enough that commuting back and forth costs me about $10. Money is my biggest issue right now. My dad is a disabled veteran, and my mom was diagnosed with cancer this year; she already had surgery, and there's more treatment coming that we have no idea how we're going to afford... We're living off my dad's disability check, which ends up being around $667 after the bank takes its monthly cut for his loan. That’s what we have left to cover the utilities and just survive month to month.
We've been trying to sell our house for three years, but nobody's buying. We're at the point where we're basically offering it for half what it's worth just to get rid of it. The bathroom is a total wreck, and we don't even have hot water. We've been eating nothing but potatoes and rice for months... Basically, we are completely screwed financially.
Today, my dad just snapped and lost it on me because the TV was on for maybe half an hour and I wasn't even watching it. Wasting electricity, he said. And that's when I just broke... I can't take it anymore.
I feel guilty for everything. Guilty for even being born, honestly, because if I hadn't been, Mom would be staying with her brothers and Dad would probably be doing okay on his own—he’s a good guy when he's solo. I get that everyone is stressed, but I can't be the punching bag for everyone's frustrations anymore... I'm blamed for wasting electricity, for eating food that costs money, and since I'm a girl, I'm even a burden for needing pads every month.
At the start of the summer, I found a job waiting tables at a local diner nearby, but my dad went ballistic over it. He won't allow his daughter to be a waitress and deal with drunks hitting on her. I'm terrified I won't be able to go to college because of the money and transportation; a monthly transit pass is about $283... which makes it even harder to find a student job in the city. I feel lucky whenever I can make maybe $100-$67 selling my drawings and paintings, but nobody cares about art these days, so it's rare...

I don't know what to do anymore. I feel useless, worthless... I always worked so hard to get straight A's and make my parents proud. I've barely gone out in my life, I've never asked them for anything... and now I just feel like I'm a weight around their necks. I'm so scared for Mom and her illness, it's terrifying...
I wish I could tell myself this is just a phase, a temporary crisis, that things will get better... but it's been like this for as long as I can remember, with very little changing.

Because of all this, along with some other failures in my life, I've become really self-destructive. I've started hating myself and punishing myself whenever I feel guilty about something. It hurts inside. I cry constantly and I don't know what to do. This whole thing has become too much to carry, and I think about suicide, even though I couldn't actually go through with it. But the thought keeps looping in my head—how nice it would be if I just wasn't here, so all this pain and guilt would just stop.

My dream is just to have $200-$100 that I could spend just on myself. To grab some takeout, buy a decent book, a piece of clothing, maybe some makeup... But even if I had that money, I wouldn't be able to spend it on myself because I'd know that tomorrow we'll still be wondering what we're going to eat...

What do I do? How do I get out of this?

I’ll tell you this: you made me cry so hard I don't even have the strength to write much. If I had more money, I'd send it to you in a heartbeat, but I'm in the same boat. I don't have a father, I live with my mom and brother on a pension, and I just lost my job... We deal with crises all the time too, but still... I want to wish you so much luck in life. My eyes are full of tears, God, you really touched my heart.

You’re honestly in a massive amount of trouble 😢

Bradley Wells said:I’ll tell you this: you made me cry so hard I don't even have the strength to write much. If I had more money, I'd send it to you in a heartbeat, but I'm in the same boat. I don't have a father, I live with my mom and brother on a pension, and I just lost my job... We deal with crises all the time too, but still... I want to wish you so much luck in life. My eyes are full of tears, God, you really touched my heart.

Sorry for making you sad... 😢
I wasn't trying to beg for money, and I definitely wouldn't take any, but thanks for the support. Good luck with everything else in your life 🙂

silentgardener19 said:You’re honestly in a massive amount of trouble 😢

No kidding 😁