What were your biggest pregnancy surprises and pet peeves?

nimbleotter4 said:Sometimes it’s actually more irritating when people assume you’re somehow overqualified for what you're going through. 😬 It’s like there’s never any winning for those of us trying to conceive.

If I'm being completely honest, what gets under my skin the most is having to drag my life down to such a snail's pace; it feels like someone just went ahead and amputated a part of my identity without asking, and now I'm just left sitting here trying to figure out how to live with this missing piece.

I suppose I'm mostly just my own worst enemy at this point. 🤦

Exactly, it’s just that I can't keep up with everything like I used to, and it sucks because back home I was never the one asking to slow down or stay in, but now I'm totally that person. 😁
Even if I just hit up three shops around the neighborhood, I have to go lie down for a bit, and some days I'm totally wiped before I even finish breakfast at 10 AM.
I seriously can't wait until I feel like my old self again. 🙂

The next person who asks me what’s wrong for the 15th time—and then, after I give them my 14th "nothing"—only to hear that I'm actually exhausted (yeah, I'm pregnant, dealing with nausea and heartburn, working this "fantastic" American corporate schedule of nearly 10 hours a day, and then cleaning the entire apartment after work... I mean, it's Friday and 11 PM, give me a break!) and decides their best response is "Oh, so what? I'm tired too, like you're the only one who works"... honestly, they're gonna be the death of me, I swear. 🙂

Seriously though, why on earth would you ask me for the hundredth time if the first 99 times I said "it's nothing"? After that much repetition, I'm just done with the nonsense and everything else along with it...

Disclaimer: I know how this thread looks and that there are probably people here with tiny kids (major props to them, really), but my real-life crew has actual normal working hours and nobody else is pregnant.
I have two little ones at home, but even they don't come at me with that aggressive attitude!

Sarah Morris57, I honestly didn't wrap my head around how it actually feels until I found myself pregnant, too. People just don't get it.

Right now, I’m on strict bed rest, yet I still get these calls asking if I can handle this or that little task."It won't hurt to stand up for just half an hour!" they say, or something along those lines. It's like the concept of pregnancy or the reality of being on doctor-ordered bed rest isn't even a piece of data that gets properly filed away in their brains.😁

But if you end up landing in the hospital because you weren't actually following that bed rest instruction🤣, well, you kind of brought it on yourself. I know because that's exactly what happened to one of the nurses I know.🤦

In the past, I didn't mind when people touched my stomach; I let them enjoy themselves.
However, those touches now frequently trigger contractions. I ask them to stop, yet they act as if it's a mystery.🤣
-I'm just doing it out of affection.
-Oh, I just adore pregnant women.
-Everything will be fine.
-Is it kicking? Is it moving?
-Look how big she's gotten.
😵

I’ve always shared that sentiment regarding people touching my stomach without permission. I actually had an experience once on a subway where an elderly woman just started running her hand over my belly. It was incredibly uncomfortable, but I eventually learned how to firmly intercept those hands and tell people quite plainly that it's rude and they shouldn't do it.
With this pregnancy, I honestly don't think my inner circle will even dream of reaching out to touch my bump.
Besides, it really is such a senseless gesture, isn't it?
Personally, I have never once felt the urge to reach out and rub someone else's stomach.

Since everyone else is venting, I guess it’s my turn to join the complaining club... 😉

Honestly, this insomnia and constant heartburn at night are driving me absolutely insane... I am just dreaming of the day I can finally sleep like a normal human being—on my stomach or my back! (you know, how I used to sleep before getting pregnant... hopefully that's coming soon!)

It also really bugs me how there’s so much stuff about pregnancy that nobody ever warns you about, but once it actually starts happening, everyone acts like it’s totally normal and happens to everybody. Like, the brain fog, the clumsiness, the hormones going haywire, and just being physically unable to do basic tasks (seriously, I almost wiped out twice yesterday just trying to dry my legs after a shower. Twice!!)

And don't even get me started on the lack of manners—like when I'm standing in line at Chase, nobody even thinks to offer me a seat, let alone let me cut ahead. I feel like I'm the only person who's ever tried to be decent to someone else in a queue😢 But hey, as long as everyone gets to say: "Oh, you're pregnant, you get special treatment." Yeah, right.

But what kills me most? It's this whole "festive December" vibe where all my girlfriends are constantly hanging out, and every time I call them, they've already got plans. They never invite me because they see me as such a "drag"—since I can't stand cigarette smoke and I definitely can't keep up with their crazy pace.😢

As for my belly? Only people I actually like are allowed to touch it.🙂 I don't mind that, but if some random stranger tries to grab me, they might lose a hand.

restlesshawk14 said:I might sound a bit blunt or even selfish to some, but I truly believe that having a child doesn't mean your life comes to a halt; on the contrary, it is actually where the real journey begins. It certainly demands an immense amount of effort, sacrifice, sweat, and time, yet it is by no means impossible because you find yourself possessed by so much more motivation, valuing every single moment and achievement far more deeply, and constantly seeking out new ways to succeed. Anyone who allows themselves to be completely consumed by their child—even when there is no medical necessity to do so—is ultimately responsible for feeling as though their own life is slipping away. With proper organization, people can successfully navigate college, sports training, and everything else; I refuse to lose my sense of self for the sake of my child, though I am always willing to adapt as much as necessary!

I'd sign off on that. I have a nearly four-year-old who has been incredibly active and "spirited," to put it politely, since day one. 😁
While I was pregnant and dealing with a newborn, my husband finished his graduate studies abroad, and I knocked out my final, most brutal exam, wrote a grueling thesis, and graduated. We moved into a new apartment (I was breastfeeding at one point near Solomon 😁), found jobs, built a social circle, and traveled quite a bit with the kid and friends. The compromise was keeping trips relatively local, and making sure our friends genuinely loved the little one—people who wouldn't mind cutting a hike short to run through a park with him. At one point, I was hitting the gym almost five times a week, and incredibly, both my husband and I still go out. Not necessarily every weekend, but we go when we plan to.
Well, I'm not going out as much anymore because I'm pregnant again. 🙂
And yeah, the kid is a handful. He slept over at his grandpa's once, but we can only leave him for a few hours at most; we don't have that luxury of constant grandparent childcare.
It's all doable simply because we have the willpower and we love each other, wanting the next one to be happy too. It works. 🎉
But back to the topic. I'm eight weeks along and I'm surprised by how little nausea I have. I barely feel pregnant, which makes this feel less "real" than my first one. I've started getting paranoid about labor, even though I have plenty of time left. And I'm dreading a summer pregnancy. There is no bigger hater of summer than me, and I still have 8 or 9 months of this ahead of me... it'll be fun.

Kate Harris3 said:I'd sign off on that. I have a nearly four-year-old who has been incredibly active and "spirited," to put it politely, since day one. 😁
While I was pregnant and dealing with a newborn, my husband finished his graduate studies abroad, and I knocked out my final, most brutal exam, wrote a grueling thesis, and graduated. We moved into a new apartment (I was breastfeeding at one point near Solomon 😁), found jobs, built a social circle, and traveled quite a bit with the kid and friends. The compromise was keeping trips relatively local, and making sure our friends genuinely loved the little one—people who wouldn't mind cutting a hike short to run through a park with him. At one point, I was hitting the gym almost five times a week, and incredibly, both my husband and I still go out. Not necessarily every weekend, but we go when we plan to.
Well, I'm not going out as much anymore because I'm pregnant again. 🙂
And yeah, the kid is a handful. He slept over at his grandpa's once, but we can only leave him for a few hours at most; we don't have that luxury of constant grandparent childcare.
It's all doable simply because we have the willpower and we love each other, wanting the next one to be happy too. It works. 🎉
But back to the topic. I'm eight weeks along and I'm surprised by how little nausea I have. I barely feel pregnant, which makes this feel less "real" than my first one. I've started getting paranoid about labor, even though I have plenty of time left. And I'm dreading a summer pregnancy. There is no bigger hater of summer than me, and I still have 8 or 9 months of this ahead of me... it'll be fun.

It’s like you read my mind...😁
I haven't had any symptoms either, which is pretty baffling to me.

I went through a summer pregnancy once before—gave birth in August when it was pushing 105 degrees in Phoenix—and I swore I’d never do it again. Yet, here I am, doing the exact same thing with a due date just a few days off from last time.😛

Here I am, joining the party 👋

Current status:
- My mom has told me about a million times, "Just get a haircut, you'll feel so much better."
- I'm 15 weeks along and eating is still a complete gamble every single day. Will this food actually stay down? Who knows. The morning sickness is technically over, but I'm still basically at war with everything I eat and every smell I encounter.
- And honestly, when I was at my absolute worst—meaning I couldn't even dream of leaving my bed for the couch, let alone seeing people—everyone kept trying to drop by. It’s like they thought I was some kind of zoo exhibit to study while I was puking. Everyone knew I felt like crap. If I had just said I had a stomach flu and needed someone to grab something from CVS, they probably would have given me a wide berth. But because it's been five weeks of vomiting and I'm "just pregnant," everyone acts like it's perfectly normal.

The constant leaking is driving me insane, but honestly? What really gets under my skin is how much people stare at pregnant women. Like, I see folks whispering, "Oh look, she’s pregnant," as if it’s some freaking miracle. And once they realize I’m not some twenty-year-old girl, it’s like they want to sprinkle holy water on me or something... 🙄
Sometimes I feel like I'm dressed like some old lady from a sitcom, just a total freak show 😁

Thomas Scott5 said:Here I am, joining the party 👋

Current status:
- My mom has told me about a million times, "Just get a haircut, you'll feel so much better."
- I'm 15 weeks along and eating is still a complete gamble every single day. Will this food actually stay down? Who knows. The morning sickness is technically over, but I'm still basically at war with everything I eat and every smell I encounter.
- And honestly, when I was at my absolute worst—meaning I couldn't even dream of leaving my bed for the couch, let alone seeing people—everyone kept trying to drop by. It’s like they thought I was some kind of zoo exhibit to study while I was puking. Everyone knew I felt like crap. If I had just said I had a stomach flu and needed someone to grab something from CVS, they probably would have given me a wide berth. But because it's been five weeks of vomiting and I'm "just pregnant," everyone acts like it's perfectly normal.

My advice? Don't do it. Stick with long hair. It's way easier—just throw it in a ponytail or a bun and you look put-together, even if you haven't washed it in days or don't have time to style it. 👍
Plus, your hair will probably grow back like crazy, so you'll be stuck at the salon constantly just to keep it manageable.

(Sorry, I hope you don't come after me; I'm just speaking from experience and what I've seen happen to my short-haired friends. 🙂 )

Kate Harris3 said:I'd sign off on that. I have a nearly four-year-old who has been incredibly active and "spirited," to put it politely, since day one. 😁
While I was pregnant and dealing with a newborn, my husband finished his graduate studies abroad, and I knocked out my final, most brutal exam, wrote a grueling thesis, and graduated. We moved into a new apartment (I was breastfeeding at one point near Solomon 😁), found jobs, built a social circle, and traveled quite a bit with the kid and friends. The compromise was keeping trips relatively local, and making sure our friends genuinely loved the little one—people who wouldn't mind cutting a hike short to run through a park with him. At one point, I was hitting the gym almost five times a week, and incredibly, both my husband and I still go out. Not necessarily every weekend, but we go when we plan to.
Well, I'm not going out as much anymore because I'm pregnant again. 🙂
And yeah, the kid is a handful. He slept over at his grandpa's once, but we can only leave him for a few hours at most; we don't have that luxury of constant grandparent childcare.
It's all doable simply because we have the willpower and we love each other, wanting the next one to be happy too. It works. 🎉
But back to the topic. I'm eight weeks along and I'm surprised by how little nausea I have. I barely feel pregnant, which makes this feel less "real" than my first one. I've started getting paranoid about labor, even though I have plenty of time left. And I'm dreading a summer pregnancy. There is no bigger hater of summer than me, and I still have 8 or 9 months of this ahead of me... it'll be fun.

Since this is a response to my post about "life ending after kids," let me clarify. After he was born, we moved thousands of miles away from everything. Now, we have absolutely no one nearby who can watch him for even five minutes. Someone mentioned nannies... but right now, that's an impossible goal, and paying $25 an hour for childcare is a stretch. Daycare is roughly $1,500 a month, which is also a lot. So, we're in a pretty unique situation. My husband works in an industry with erratic shifts; he usually takes the 2 PM to 10 PM slot just so he can spend as much time with us as possible. His commute is an hour each way.

Sure, I agree everything is doable with enough organization, but... well, some of us aren't that lucky. 🙂

P.S. Not sure why only this specific post was quoted for me.

Hannah Nguyen3 said:Since this is a response to my post about "life ending after kids," let me clarify. After he was born, we moved thousands of miles away from everything. Now, we have absolutely no one nearby who can watch him for even five minutes. Someone mentioned nannies... but right now, that's an impossible goal, and paying $25 an hour for childcare is a stretch. Daycare is roughly $1,500 a month, which is also a lot. So, we're in a pretty unique situation. My husband works in an industry with erratic shifts; he usually takes the 2 PM to 10 PM slot just so he can spend as much time with us as possible. His commute is an hour each way.

Sure, I agree everything is doable with enough organization, but... well, some of us aren't that lucky. 🙂

P.S. Not sure why only this specific post was quoted for me.

Well, obviously you two have your own situation going on.
The reason I brought up a nanny is because most of the time, it’s just gonna be me and the baby—plus, I’ll be living over a thousand miles away from basically everyone I know! So, I won't really have a choice... if I ever want to step foot outside my front door for anything at all, I'm gonna need help, even though man, I would love to save that cash if I could. And honestly? I'm crossing my fingers for some maternity leave benefits so I don't have to rely on a sitter full-time, since those costs are gonna hit just as hard as what you're looking at.
But when it comes down to it and I've got no other options, I might as well make the best of it, right? We've got this crazy big plan we're working toward, sure, but it'll cost me way less to grab a few hours here and there to handle my own business than to totally lose my mind because I can't go anywhere... I don't want to turn into someone who forgets why they were even working this hard in the first place!...

Brenda Doyle5 said:My advice? Don't do it. Stick with long hair. It's way easier—just throw it in a ponytail or a bun and you look put-together, even if you haven't washed it in days or don't have time to style it. 👍
Plus, your hair will probably grow back like crazy, so you'll be stuck at the salon constantly just to keep it manageable.

(Sorry, I hope you don't come after me; I'm just speaking from experience and what I've seen happen to my short-haired friends. 🙂 )

No worries,🙂 I won't. That’s actually exactly how I feel about it too. Maybe once I have kids and it's summer, then I might consider it so it grows out by autumn, but right now? No chance.

I am genuinely reaching my breaking point with these ridiculous yeast infections; I honestly have no idea how to get rid of them for good. I’ve been cutting out sweets entirely and using over-the-counter treatments, but the second I stop, they just come right back. It feels incredibly pathetic, if I'm being honest. 😕

And on top of all that, I can't help but feel bothered by my mother-in-law constantly calling me "fat." It's just so tacky and unnecessary... 🙂
I’m only 13 weeks along, so who knows what else is in store for me... 🙂

Some relatives of my husband call me fat.
I am not fat at all.
They say it because they lack wit; they simply speak to hear themselves talk, likely attempting humor. I find no amusement in it.
It is not entertaining, particularly when I am already struggling to feel comfortable in my own skin regardless of my size. I am pregnant. My hormones are fluctuating and I barely recognize my own body, yet they think telling me I am fat is helpful.
As if that would cheer me up.

Hey everyone! :-) Here’s another warrior checking in :-)

Even my own family members call me "the chunky one!" They think it’s somehow cute or endearing, like, "Oh hey, look at how big you've gotten!" But honestly? I am not actually fat. Everything is pretty much the same as it was before, except for my belly. But whatever—even if I were, I don't get what the big deal is supposed to be!
Also, can we talk about how incredibly annoying it is when people give you advice based on how things were thirty years ago? And then they have the nerve to act all shocked or judge you when things have changed, lecturing you like, "That can't possibly be right."
I have to admit, it really gets under my skin that even though I'm only six weeks out from delivery, everyone acts like I can still do everything exactly like I did before. It's like there's zero chance anyone will actually try to make things easier for me. Look, I'm not some fragile little flower, but a little bit of help here and there—or just someone being thoughtful—wouldn't hurt. Or even just asking, "Hey, can I help you with that?"
And don't even get me started on those new moms who feel the need to recount every single horror story they've ever heard about childbirth. Like, seriously? What is the point of that????

Anyway, that's my rant :-)

I actually got into a bit of a spat with my husband’s aunt because I told her straight up: the full shave is over. And what does she do? She tries to lecture me about how they used to shave everything back in the day 🤦—as if that matters! It doesn't prove a thing. To make matters worse, now my husband is acting like *I'm* the rude one and says I should have handled it "more gracefully"... give me a break. I'm the one who is pregnant RIGHT NOW, not twenty-five years ago. I've taken the classes, I've listened to modern moms and their advice, and I'm the one dealing with a total hormonal meltdown—so apparently, THAT means I'm supposed to just be "nicer" and shut up?!?! WTF?!?!

Or maybe it's more like... what am I even supposed to do?? Honestly, I haven't got a clue. Are you totally sure about this? Maybe you should double-check that first 🙄

I’ve been through the absolute wringer during this pregnancy—dealing with everything from gestational diabetes to those annoying varicose veins—and honestly, I am just counting down the days until I can have my old body back. It’s incredibly frustrating when none of my clothes fit anymore; I feel like a total elephant, which is especially annoying since I actually gained about half as much weight as I did with my first child. All in all, I don't exactly feel like I'm at my most attractive right now... 🕺