Battle with the Boomers

I really hate having to vent about my personal struggles like this, but honestly, I feel like I’m reaching a breaking point here! I truly hope you all don't mind reading through this 😁...
I am dealing with some incredibly heavy issues within my family, particularly when it comes to my mother. It feels like we are constantly at odds because she tends to attack me verbally; she calls me stupid, incompetent, a sociopath, or just lazy. There is this immense pressure coming from her to find a job immediately—she doesn't want me to be a financial burden, though I personally have no desire to take some degrading, low-paying entry-level position right after finishing high school. She also pushes me to enroll in college here, but I really don't want to continue my education in the States; my dream is to study abroad, even though I realize that requires a massive amount of capital. On top of that, she pressures me to go out and socialize in the city, but I just don't have the headspace for it because I can't seem to relax or enjoy myself, and frankly, people in the city aren't exactly pleasant to be around. My mom constantly discourages me, telling me that I'll never make it or that my dreams are just unrealistic fantasies, and she even accuses me of lying or making things up. Other family members just tell me to shut up and suck it up, but sometimes I just snap, and that's when the confrontations with her really escalate. Even during the rare moments when we aren't fighting, there is this lingering awkwardness; I don't really view her as a mother figure, and she doesn't act like I'm her son or anything like that. She has this way of systematically tearing down my self-confidence, my dignity, and my pride. I would love nothing more than to move out, but I simply don't have the money for an apartment (and even if I did, I wouldn't want to live in this area), nor would I want to crash with relatives or friends because the embarrassment would be too much to bear. To try and scrape some money together, I've been attempting to start some online work—though I'm quite uncertain if it will actually succeed—and I'm thinking that if it takes off, I might be able to save enough to move abroad to study while working simultaneously.
I'm starting to think I seriously need to see a psychiatrist or a psychologist (I've sought help before, but I felt like they didn't truly understand my perspective), so does anyone have a recommendation for a good doctor, or should I perhaps apply through the unemployment office to access free services?

coastalviper2 said:I really hate having to vent about my personal struggles like this, but honestly, I feel like I’m reaching a breaking point here! I truly hope you all don't mind reading through this 😁...
I am dealing with some incredibly heavy issues within my family, particularly when it comes to my mother. It feels like we are constantly at odds because she tends to attack me verbally; she calls me stupid, incompetent, a sociopath, or just lazy. There is this immense pressure coming from her to find a job immediately—she doesn't want me to be a financial burden, though I personally have no desire to take some degrading, low-paying entry-level position right after finishing high school. She also pushes me to enroll in college here, but I really don't want to continue my education in the States; my dream is to study abroad, even though I realize that requires a massive amount of capital. On top of that, she pressures me to go out and socialize in the city, but I just don't have the headspace for it because I can't seem to relax or enjoy myself, and frankly, people in the city aren't exactly pleasant to be around. My mom constantly discourages me, telling me that I'll never make it or that my dreams are just unrealistic fantasies, and she even accuses me of lying or making things up. Other family members just tell me to shut up and suck it up, but sometimes I just snap, and that's when the confrontations with her really escalate. Even during the rare moments when we aren't fighting, there is this lingering awkwardness; I don't really view her as a mother figure, and she doesn't act like I'm her son or anything like that. She has this way of systematically tearing down my self-confidence, my dignity, and my pride. I would love nothing more than to move out, but I simply don't have the money for an apartment (and even if I did, I wouldn't want to live in this area), nor would I want to crash with relatives or friends because the embarrassment would be too much to bear. To try and scrape some money together, I've been attempting to start some online work—though I'm quite uncertain if it will actually succeed—and I'm thinking that if it takes off, I might be able to save enough to move abroad to study while working simultaneously.
I'm starting to think I seriously need to see a psychiatrist or a psychologist (I've sought help before, but I felt like they didn't truly understand my perspective), so does anyone have a recommendation for a good doctor, or should I perhaps apply through the unemployment office to access free services?

You already gave yourself the answer. Nobody is going to hand you opportunities on a silver platter; you have to create them yourself. It’s time to roll up your sleeves and get to work... 👍

coastalviper2 said:I really hate having to vent about my personal struggles like this, but honestly, I feel like I’m reaching a breaking point here! I truly hope you all don't mind reading through this 😁...
I am dealing with some incredibly heavy issues within my family, particularly when it comes to my mother. It feels like we are constantly at odds because she tends to attack me verbally; she calls me stupid, incompetent, a sociopath, or just lazy. There is this immense pressure coming from her to find a job immediately—she doesn't want me to be a financial burden, though I personally have no desire to take some degrading, low-paying entry-level position right after finishing high school. She also pushes me to enroll in college here, but I really don't want to continue my education in the States; my dream is to study abroad, even though I realize that requires a massive amount of capital. On top of that, she pressures me to go out and socialize in the city, but I just don't have the headspace for it because I can't seem to relax or enjoy myself, and frankly, people in the city aren't exactly pleasant to be around. My mom constantly discourages me, telling me that I'll never make it or that my dreams are just unrealistic fantasies, and she even accuses me of lying or making things up. Other family members just tell me to shut up and suck it up, but sometimes I just snap, and that's when the confrontations with her really escalate. Even during the rare moments when we aren't fighting, there is this lingering awkwardness; I don't really view her as a mother figure, and she doesn't act like I'm her son or anything like that. She has this way of systematically tearing down my self-confidence, my dignity, and my pride. I would love nothing more than to move out, but I simply don't have the money for an apartment (and even if I did, I wouldn't want to live in this area), nor would I want to crash with relatives or friends because the embarrassment would be too much to bear. To try and scrape some money together, I've been attempting to start some online work—though I'm quite uncertain if it will actually succeed—and I'm thinking that if it takes off, I might be able to save enough to move abroad to study while working simultaneously.
I'm starting to think I seriously need to see a psychiatrist or a psychologist (I've sought help before, but I felt like they didn't truly understand my perspective), so does anyone have a recommendation for a good doctor, or should I perhaps apply through the unemployment office to access free services?

_______

coastalviper2 said:I really hate having to vent about my personal struggles like this, but honestly, I feel like I’m reaching a breaking point here! I truly hope you all don't mind reading through this 😁...
I am dealing with some incredibly heavy issues within my family, particularly when it comes to my mother. It feels like we are constantly at odds because she tends to attack me verbally; she calls me stupid, incompetent, a sociopath, or just lazy. There is this immense pressure coming from her to find a job immediately—she doesn't want me to be a financial burden, though I personally have no desire to take some degrading, low-paying entry-level position right after finishing high school. She also pushes me to enroll in college here, but I really don't want to continue my education in the States; my dream is to study abroad, even though I realize that requires a massive amount of capital. On top of that, she pressures me to go out and socialize in the city, but I just don't have the headspace for it because I can't seem to relax or enjoy myself, and frankly, people in the city aren't exactly pleasant to be around. My mom constantly discourages me, telling me that I'll never make it or that my dreams are just unrealistic fantasies, and she even accuses me of lying or making things up. Other family members just tell me to shut up and suck it up, but sometimes I just snap, and that's when the confrontations with her really escalate. Even during the rare moments when we aren't fighting, there is this lingering awkwardness; I don't really view her as a mother figure, and she doesn't act like I'm her son or anything like that. She has this way of systematically tearing down my self-confidence, my dignity, and my pride. I would love nothing more than to move out, but I simply don't have the money for an apartment (and even if I did, I wouldn't want to live in this area), nor would I want to crash with relatives or friends because the embarrassment would be too much to bear. To try and scrape some money together, I've been attempting to start some online work—though I'm quite uncertain if it will actually succeed—and I'm thinking that if it takes off, I might be able to save enough to move abroad to study while working simultaneously.
I'm starting to think I seriously need to see a psychiatrist or a psychologist (I've sought help before, but I felt like they didn't truly understand my perspective), so does anyone have a recommendation for a good doctor, or should I perhaps apply through the unemployment office to access free services?

Life is a pretty harsh thing in all its different forms (and city life is just one small slice of that unpleasantness). Saying you aren't "in the mood" for life doesn't really work, because life eventually forces you into a corner where there's no way out... 🤷

I'll give you one solid piece of advice, kid: "who risk wins..." 😉

Ronald Rogers27

MAN, IT MUST BE NICE BEING STUPID! 👍

You don't have mental health issues; you're just lazy and ungrateful.
Find a decent job, save some money, and move out to study elsewhere. Or try to snag a scholarship for an out-of-state school, or maybe someone could help get you a job abroad so you can enroll in college there.

It’s easy to sit around dreaming and typing about what you would or wouldn't do, but dragging your mother through this is low. All she wants is for you to either work, go to school, or move away.

Maybe you really do have problems, and maybe your mother truly is terrible, but neither of those things is going to fix the situation.

You people are just being plain old stubborn! Honestly, you're acting just like my grandmother used to. If this is really how you all intend to write, then I suppose you should just chase
yourselves away from this thread!

Jerry Thomas14 said:MAN, IT MUST BE NICE BEING STUPID! 👍

It really is quite lovely how oblivious you are. 👍

rowdyhawk27 said:You don't have mental health issues; you're just lazy and ungrateful.
Find a decent job, save some money, and move out to study elsewhere. Or try to snag a scholarship for an out-of-state school, or maybe someone could help get you a job abroad so you can enroll in college there.

It’s easy to sit around dreaming and typing about what you would or wouldn't do, but dragging your mother through this is low. All she wants is for you to either work, go to school, or move away.

Maybe you really do have problems, and maybe your mother truly is terrible, but neither of those things is going to fix the situation.

You really ought to watch your mouth! You are talking nonsense and making accusations against me without any proof whatsoever! Let me tell you, you don't have to believe me if you don't want to, but I really feel like setting you straight—I spend every single day helping everyone in my family at home...

Ronald Rogers27 said:You already gave yourself the answer. Nobody is going to hand you opportunities on a silver platter; you have to create them yourself. It’s time to roll up your sleeves and get to work... 👍

_______

Life is a pretty harsh thing in all its different forms (and city life is just one small slice of that unpleasantness). Saying you aren't "in the mood" for life doesn't really work, because life eventually forces you into a corner where there's no way out... 🤷

I'll give you one solid piece of advice, kid: "who risk wins..." 😉

Ronald Rogers27

That isn't true at all! Society is actually one of the biggest inconveniences of all! I truly want to live my life, but I feel so completely exhausted after a constant struggle, almost like being stuck in a marathon at Dunkin', except the issue is that I just don't seem to have the courage; I struggle with social anxiety, depression, and other issues, while people like you make everything sound so simple and hollow (and I mean that without any intention of being insulting)

coastalviper2 said:That isn't true at all! Society is actually one of the biggest inconveniences of all! I truly want to live my life, but I feel so completely exhausted after a constant struggle, almost like being stuck in a marathon at Dunkin', except the issue is that I just don't seem to have the courage; I struggle with social anxiety, depression, and other issues, while people like you make everything sound so simple and hollow (and I mean that without any intention of being insulting)

Actually, it is true. What isn't true about it? You're trying to prove you're above the fray by ignoring everyone, looking down on people, and isolating yourself—all while telling yourself that they're the problem and you're perfectly fine. 😵

Society IS one of the biggest headaches, sure. But it's also the ultimate test of how YOU learn to navigate the world and tackle those issues (that friction between you and the crowd) and the way you choose to handle it...

It’s basically your mental fingerprint. It shows how much you've grown up. 🙂

Ronald Rogers27

Ronald Rogers27 said:Actually, it is true. What isn't true about it? You're trying to prove you're above the fray by ignoring everyone, looking down on people, and isolating yourself—all while telling yourself that they're the problem and you're perfectly fine. 😵

Society IS one of the biggest headaches, sure. But it's also the ultimate test of how YOU learn to navigate the world and tackle those issues (that friction between you and the crowd) and the way you choose to handle it...

It’s basically your mental fingerprint. It shows how much you've grown up. 🙂

Ronald Rogers27

I don't necessarily think it's a case of "everyone else is bad and I'm the only good one!" And honestly, let's not get too caught up in discussing society itself, since that isn't even the most vital part; I'd say family is much more important because that's what really shapes how we behave when we are out in the world.🤣
just so you're aware, I actually consider myself quite successful in social settings.

Honestly, you really only have two paths worth taking here:

1. Get out there and find a job.

2. Or just stay put and finish your studies right here.

The sooner you wrap your head around that, the better off you'll be in the long run.

Eric White10 said:Honestly, you really only have two paths worth taking here:

1. Get out there and find a job.

2. Or just stay put and finish your studies right here.

The sooner you wrap your head around that, the better off you'll be in the long run.

Exactly.

Can I just start now? I mean, I could have gone to Harvard or worked at NASA, but instead, I’m stuck here. Honestly, I feel miserable. I'm just sitting around, not working, not studying—it's exhausting.

Don't take this the wrong way, I'm not trying to be mean, but that's honestly how you're coming across.

Eric White10 said:Honestly, you really only have two paths worth taking here:

1. Get out there and find a job.

2. Or just stay put and finish your studies right here.

The sooner you wrap your head around that, the better off you'll be in the long run.

Well, I think I realized that quite a long time ago, actually.
I mean, I'm currently living in Canada.

rowdyhawk27 said:Exactly.

Can I just start now? I mean, I could have gone to Harvard or worked at NASA, but instead, I’m stuck here. Honestly, I feel miserable. I'm just sitting around, not working, not studying—it's exhausting.

Don't take this the wrong way, I'm not trying to be mean, but that's honestly how you're coming across.

Well, I don't think you can just jump into something like that out of thin air; I suppose you really have to have an intense, burning desire for it first.
For instance, almost everyone would love to own a beautiful, high-end luxury car, but I'd imagine they won't actually get one unless they possess a truly powerful will to make it happen...
So, acting as a rational person, I think I'll have to respectfully decline your advice.👍

Look, man, you came here asking for an opinion, and now you've got one. If you aren't ready to face the fact that you're wrong and actually rethink your stance, that’s on you—just like it’s on you to stop being so rude to anyone who doesn't see eye to eye with you.

Mom is right, and you know what? Unlike all these random people popping up on this forum, she actually loves you more than anything and genuinely wants the best for you. She’s a woman with real-world experience, and you’d be a lot smarter if you actually listened to her advice once in a while. It’s no wonder she snaps at you if this is how you treat her, just like how you treat everyone else on here.

Listen, you're the master of your own fate, and you're the only one in this whole situation who can really screw things up for yourself. Get your head straight. Pick a goal and go after it.

Angela Wright said:Look, man, you came here asking for an opinion, and now you've got one. If you aren't ready to face the fact that you're wrong and actually rethink your stance, that’s on you—just like it’s on you to stop being so rude to anyone who doesn't see eye to eye with you.

Mom is right, and you know what? Unlike all these random people popping up on this forum, she actually loves you more than anything and genuinely wants the best for you. She’s a woman with real-world experience, and you’d be a lot smarter if you actually listened to her advice once in a while. It’s no wonder she snaps at you if this is how you treat her, just like how you treat everyone else on here.

Listen, you're the master of your own fate, and you're the only one in this whole situation who can really screw things up for yourself. Get your head straight. Pick a goal and go after it.

I don't even consider some of those posts to be opinions; they feel more like outright insults, and I wouldn't say I'm being rude, I'm just defending myself—which I believe is my right...
You're claiming my mother (who you don't even know) is the absolute best, and while I suppose some moms do mean well, sometimes they can definitely overstep.
I am much, much smarter and quite wise (not that I'm bragging, I guess😁), and I do think about my actions, it's just that I'm feeling frustrated because I feel like you people are constantly misunderstanding me (I suppose I might be at fault for how I worded the problem, so I'll probably edit it later).
Moms, or people who are physically or mentally destroying someone's life, I guess they deserve less respect, or rather, they simply receive less of it.

I was wondering if it might be possible to have this thread deleted, please

coastalviper2 said:I was wondering if it might be possible to have this thread deleted, please

No way am I deleting your thread (that’s not what I’m doing here). Look, you’re just being a total wimp—always shaking and acting like a poser. You need to face reality when you look in the mirror. You aren't the center of the universe. 🙈

Your whole vibe is totally off. You're way too full of yourself... 🙂

(Seriously, you only care about yourself.) 🙂

Ronald Rogers27

I honestly don't get why you're so dead set on not going to college in your own hometown.
Like, what's with this sudden, massive urge to just pack up and cross the border?
Look, I deal with way more heavy-duty drama with my old man than you probably can imagine, but even then, I'm still gonna suck it up and get my degree right here in my own city.
When life hands you a total mess, you gotta find a way to squeeze every bit of good out of a bad situation.
If you don't have a degree, you’re basically a nobody—especially when you're trying to make it in Canada.

Ronald Rogers27 said:No way am I deleting your thread (that’s not what I’m doing here). Look, you’re just being a total wimp—always shaking and acting like a poser. You need to face reality when you look in the mirror. You aren't the center of the universe. 🙈

Your whole vibe is totally off. You're way too full of yourself... 🙂

(Seriously, you only care about yourself.) 🙂

Ronald Rogers27

I honestly want to delete this entire thread because what was written about the issue is just plain wrong—it’s inaccurate and incorrect! That's why people keep getting the wrong idea about me, and I suppose you're actually the perfect example of that
I am definitely not a coward; if I weren't strong enough to face this damn world, I probably wouldn't even be alive today, despite still being here
I don't love myself, and I certainly don't think I'm the center of the universe