A lot going on lately

On the thread about how everyone's feeling, I wrote that I "can't wait to light up again."
It's Christmas season, so I actually gave up smoking for a bit.
Then some guy hits me with this: Nicole Carter82 says: Check out this post
"Can't wait to light up again"

Hey Nicole Carter82,

If I’m reading you right and we’re talking about "greenery," please try to avoid posts like this. I’m really not trying to kill the vibe or judge anyone for what they do in private, but we are on a public Forum, you know? It feels a little awkward having everyone read stuff like that—plus, it doesn't really have much to do with spirituality moderation.

I hope you can understand where I'm coming from.

Also, just move the topic to waste.

Seriously, what is even going on with this Forum lately?
Can we please move people who post this kind of nonsense to a space where they actually belong?
Please.
Otherwise, there’s honestly no point to this Forum anymore.
Especially since, even though my post isn't even about what they think I'm implying, people talk about that other kind of smoking on here all the time and I've never once seen any waste being a sanction for it—I could probably find plenty of examples if I looked.
It's just weird and totally nonsensical...😵

What’s the actual payoff for temporarily quitting smoking? Are you just looking for ways to punish yourself? Don't you realize that whatever you give up is returned to God?

God doesn't need your carcinogenic little rolls. Either commit to quitting for good or don't bother at all.

Hi Nicole Carter82,

I guess we should probably just take a step back here. If there’s a misunderstanding, I think it can be resolved pretty easily without everyone getting worked up over nothing.

Just to clarify my side of things... first off, I actually left both of our posts visible in the original thread, How are you feeling, for a little while, mostly because I wanted to give you a chance to respond in case I had totally misread what you meant by "lighting up." I also tried to be careful by adding "assuming this was about vegetables" as a bit of a safeguard. I noticed you’ve logged onto the Forum at least twice since then, and since you didn't reach out to let me know I’d misinterpreted your post, I moved it over to the Waste - unnecessary/inappropriate posts and more section, where it’s still viewable. So, I haven't deleted your post, and I certainly wasn't just tossing it into the "trash"; I was honestly just waiting for a reply that never came.

Secondly, if you missed my response in the original thread because it slipped past you or something, you probably saw that I opened a specific thread called Spirituality Moderation - notices, questions, and suggestions. In the opening post of that thread, I wrote: "Hey everyone, please feel free to post any questions here if there's any confusion regarding moderation, or if you have suggestions or advice regarding this sub-forum."
That thread is basically intended for all sorts of misunderstandings, disagreements, or general questions, and I try to answer everything on the same day. I think it would have been a bit more practical to post your question there so we could have cleared this up immediately.

Thirdly, regarding why I brought it up—within the Spirituality sub-forum, people frequently mention drugs in a positive light quite often. You see people openly talking about using various "substances," or posting images themed around marijuana and things like that. Aside from that (which isn't about you specifically, but rather about what doesn't belong in this sub-forum), there is also a fair amount of vulgarity, like inappropriate language or crude YouTube clips and images. Since I took over moderation duties, I've decided to put an end to those kinds of "bad" habits, because, at the end of the day, we are in the Spirituality section, not hanging out on a street corner outside a 7-Eleven with a beer in hand.
Your post struck me as just another instance of mentioning "weed" in a positive context, which is why I tried to politely ask you not to do that, adding the note "assuming this was about vegetables". I can't really speak to how things are tolerated in other sub-forums, but they won't be tolerated in the one I moderate. I'm not judging what anyone does behind closed doors, but the Forum is visited by minors who shouldn't be given a bad example under the guise of "spirituality." Ultimately, drugs and spirituality don't really have anything to do with each other, regardless of whether we're talking about adults or kids. It might be okay theoretically to discuss how certain substances affect the human state, but not in a way that encourages their use.
Furthermore, moving a post to Waste isn't a sanction, as you suggested. A sanction would be a formal warning or a ban. During my time as moderator, nobody has even received a warning, even though there have been situations where other moderators definitely would have handed them out.

Fourth, since we're going through this point by point—you were posting in the Spirituality sub-forum. It would be nice to try and stick to the core theme of the section. I have no idea if you've renounced smoking in your recovery, so I didn't frame your post in that context. It’s also not entirely clear to me how spirituality relates to wanting to light a cigarette, potential nicotine addiction, or recovery. A lot of threads in Spirituality get cluttered with random stuff, which makes the whole sub-forum messy and hard to read for people who actually want to read about genuine spiritual matters.

To be honest, your reaction to this misunderstanding seems a little exaggerated to me, and it feels more like it's aimed at escalating the "problem" rather than actually fixing it. Regardless, I want to apologize to you for partially misreading your post and if I said anything to offend you. I am perfectly willing to move the post back to its original spot, provided I can edit it to add the word "cigarette" at the end. Still, I’d just ask that you keep the purpose of these types of posts in mind within the Spirituality section, as I'll soon be cleaning up all the threads to remove things that don't belong here. I'll leave only a few threads for things not related to the topic, like the Chat section and things like that.

And honestly, feel free to just reach out to me directly in the "spirituality moderation" thread or through a private message from now on. I’m really not trying to act like some big shot or anything, like you suggested, but I think I'm actually a pretty reasonable person who's easy enough to talk to if we just communicate normally. 😉 I guess I should point out that in my previous post, I actually used the phrase "please" twice without even once resorting to a single swear word, showing any sign of irritation, or acting at all aggressive.

I suppose I’ll just paste the original posts at the end, if that makes things easier to follow. Since some of what you wrote above might be a little hard to parse without the quotation marks or specific citations, I figured this might help clarify exactly what everyone was saying.

Nicole Carter82 said:I guess I’m just really looking forward to getting things fired up again.🙂

coastalfalcon61 said:Hey there, Nicole Carter82,

If I’m understanding this correctly and we’re talking about "vegetables," I guess I should probably ask that you try to avoid posts like this in the future. I really don't want to be a killjoy or judge anyone for what they choose to do on their own time, but since we are on a public Forum, it feels a little awkward having everyone read through stuff like this. It doesn't seem to have much to do with spirituality moderation, either.

I guess I just need you to try and understand where I'm coming from.

Wow, you really went there...
So now I’m the bad guy because I didn't catch where you were heading right away?🤣
The title was literally just "how are you guys feeling."
I just answered based on how I was feeling at that exact moment.
It honestly never even crossed my mind that someone would take it the wrong way.
If you're reading into things that deeply, I guess that says more about you than me.
I thought this was supposed to be a place for quick thoughts—just a vibe check, maybe—not some deep monologue about self-denial or whatever.
Then there's the fact that you're tracking how often I log on...😵
Or how you start a thread and just assume I already know what it's about 😵in your head.
And all this "protecting the minors" stuff—I mean, what would kids even be doing on this Forum anyway?
I thought this was an adult space?!
You say you're "protecting" them and then tell me I can't even mention "cigarettes"...🤣
Just do whatever you want with your version of spirituality moderation. It doesn't really matter to me, so I'll just try to steer clear of it.

Jesse Price said:What’s even the point of just taking a temporary break from smoking? You trying to punish yourself or something? You know that whatever you give up, you eventually return to God, right?

God doesn't need your carcinogenic little cigarettes. Either commit to quitting for good or just don't bother at all.

There's always someone ready to play preacher, isn't there?🙂

Nicole Carter82 said:I guess you’ve really gone and written quite a bit there...
So now I’m the one at fault just because I didn't catch which way you were heading right away? I guess I might have missed it, maybe, but it feels like I'm getting blamed for something that wasn't exactly clear.🤣
The title was just "how are you all feeling."
I just answered based on how I was feeling at that exact moment, I guess.
It never even crossed my mind that anyone would take what I said and twist it into something else entirely.
That’s actually kind of a problem, I suppose, because whatever it is that triggers that association in you probably says more about who you are than anything else.
I guess this is probably that space where we just share quick thoughts or how we're feeling, rather than me sitting here writing entire long-winded monologues about things like greed or self-denial and all that stuff.
I guess I was just noticing how many times you’ve been tracking my login activity lately.😵
Since you went ahead and started this whole thread assuming that I... I guess I know. For her.😵
I guess I’m just wondering about this whole idea of "protecting" minors—because, honestly, what would they even be doing on a forum like this anyway?
I honestly thought this was meant for adults?!
You’re acting like you’re protecting minors by insisting that I write out the word "cigarettes."🤣
I guess you can go ahead and do whatever you want regarding that spirituality moderation thing; it doesn't really mean much to me, so I'll probably just try to steer clear of it whenever I can.

I guess I ended up rambling a bit because it was pretty obvious that all of this really upset you, so I just wanted to try and explain myself and clear up the misunderstanding between us. Besides, since you started a whole new thread on the Governor's page that so many people are following, I figured I might as well take the opportunity to clarify a few things for everyone else on the Spirituality sub-forum who might drop by after reading your post.

I didn't mean to imply that you were at fault for any of this, I was really just trying to walk through how things ended up in this position. I think I even apologized earlier for misinterpreting things on my end, and if I happened to say anything that came off as offensive, I'm truly sorry about that.
My main issue right now involves a few members on the Forum who act like they own the place, and because of them, I find myself having to step in and moderate threads way more often than I’d actually like to. It's just one of those things where, if I don't go through everything and address every single violation, I guess I run the risk of someone complaining that I'm being selective with my enforcement, so I end up having to police everything just to keep things fair.

If you take a look at the very first post in the "How I'm Feeling" thread, you’ll probably see what I mean—it isn't really about someone venting about their cravings for a cigarette, but more about how they're processing things from a standpoint of spirituality. I guess the temporary decision to give up nicotine during Lent doesn't quite fit under the Spirituality moderation section, because it's essentially just a religious custom, which I think belongs over in the Religion forum instead.

I’ve been keeping an eye on when you log in, just so I can tell if you might have had a chance to see my message, and I guess I just wanted to figure out how we could find some time for you to get back to me so we can hopefully move past this whole circus surrounding nothing. I feel like that approach is probably fair enough and maybe even necessary on my end. If you aren't comfortable with people seeing when you're active on the Forum, though, you should be able to change those settings in your profile options.

I honestly assumed you’d be aware of the "spirituality moderation" thread, especially since you follow that specific Forum and actually posted a message there that we’re basically dissecting right now. That whole discussion has been sitting right there on the first page for about a week now, so I figured it would have been on your radar.

I guess minors on this Forum act just like everyone else—they read through threads and post in the topics that actually catch their interest. I don't really see any reason why the Forum, or even the Spirituality sub-forum specifically, should be restricted only to adults.

I mean, I suppose I could just write out the word "cigarette" if that helps clarify exactly what we're talking about.
I tried to meet you halfway by sending back a post that doesn't really belong in the Spirituality section, just so you wouldn't stay upset with me. But, looking at what you've written here, I get the feeling that doing that probably won't change anything regarding the situation or how you feel about it anyway.

Even though you mentioned that spirituality isn't really a huge priority for you, I guess you should know that you’re always more than welcome to jump into any discussions regarding spirituality whenever you feel like it.

Jesse Price said:What’s even the point of just quitting smoking temporarily? You looking for some kind of penance? You know everything you give up gets returned to God, right?

God doesn't need your carcinogenic little cigarettes. Either commit to quitting for good or don't bother at all.

Watching your brilliant, hedonistic lifestyle play out on these heated sub-forums—can I actually hope that you'll be the one handing out punishments to smokers?

Nicole Carter82 said:Where does everyone find the energy to act like such an expert on everything? 🙂

That’s true enough. Give it a shot. I'm not sure what you're getting at here. Could you clarify?It worked for me.

Dennis Hall41 said:Watching your brilliant, libertine work unfold across those heated sub-forums, I have to wonder—do I have any right to hope that you might actually start cracking down on smokers?

You’d think anyone following my updates would have figured out by now that I’m quite the handful. 🙄

Jesse Price said:That’s just how it goes. You should maybe try this—it actually helped me out.

:

Where on earth did you get the idea that I need help?
I think you're just way too wrapped up in yourself...

Anyone else following Sanimara's posts?
It's just constant jumping from topic to topic, endless rambling, and nothing but insults. 🥱