Jonathan Edwards69 said:About a year ago, I had a similar run-in with Paxil. Back then, it was major depressive disorder, and honestly, I was dealing with suicidal thoughts too. Paxil actually helped quite a bit. I stayed on top of my checkups, but then the doctor I was seeing left the clinic and isn't practicing here anymore, and I just... stopped. Stopped taking the meds and stopped going to appointments altogether. In hindsight, I think that was a massive mistake, but god, I just couldn't face the idea of hunting down a new psychiatrist and having to sit there and explain my whole life story all over again. It felt exhausting.
The way I feel right now? It's constant insomnia. And there's this heavy lack of interest in my work, plus I'm incredibly distracted and forgetful, which is starting to really freak me out. For instance, I'll have a clear mental image of something—like a chainsaw—and I just can't find the word for it when I need it! It’s like I’ve suddenly become incredibly dim-witted. There are moments where I'm so spaced out it’s genuinely worrying; losing track of things has basically become my new normal.😲
You mentioned how you can't find the right word quickly enough, and how much that scares you. What if I told you I went through similar issues—actually, maybe even worse? Ever since I hit puberty, these really strange symptoms started showing up. First, my field of vision would narrow, almost like looking at a bright light and having those spots linger. Except for me, those spots would get wider and wider until I literally couldn't see anything. Then came the headaches and that constant struggle to remember names, terms, or just basic words. I remember one particularly rough situation when I first started a new job; they sent me to grab something, and I got to the spot where it was supposed to be, but I couldn't remember what it was called to save my life. I just kept saying, 😳"the thing, you know, that thing you put on..." You can imagine how ridiculous that felt. And that was just one instance.
To make a long story short, all of those problems vanished once I discovered the joys of sex. How old are you? It didn't always have to be full-on sex for me; even masturbation helped, which was where my issue actually lay. I used to have this intense pressure in my temples and at the top of my head, so bad I thought my skull might actually crack. No painkiller could touch it.
Let me know how old you are, how often you're active (if you are), and what your libido is actually like. Mine was non-existent (and still is😁).
If you have everything you need, I'd suggest getting a CT scan of your head immediately. I had one done after talking to a neurologist once my symptoms finally cleared up. The results were totally normal. I should mention that all my tests—including blood pressure—were always perfectly fine, so it wasn't something like that.
If your CT comes back clear, then you know what you'll have to do. Unfortunately.
Nowadays, I only get headaches when I need "that" release, though they aren't nearly as bad as they used to be—even if the blurred vision has been acting up again lately. I often get scared that the whole thing is coming back. Guess I might need to be more active too.