Religion classes in school - Megathread

Kate Brown49 said:I agree, Jesse Cook4... My only takeaway is that if a kid wants to receive their sacraments (Communion and Confirmation), they basically have to take religious ed in school, plus church classes during the actual year they receive them. If I’m lucky and I’ve got this wrong, maybe I can just pull her out of the school program next year. 😬

Yeah, you basically have to check both boxes if you want the child to receive Communion.

For my little one, it actually matters quite a bit right now, so we make an effort to attend Sunday Mass and the local parish classes regularly. But once she hits that age where she doesn't care anymore? We aren't signing her up for religious ed.

I realize that sounds hypocritical, but let's be honest: we enrolled her in the school's religion class just so she wouldn't feel like an outsider among her peers. Personally, I don't practice my faith much more than anyone else, even though I consider myself a believer. I certainly wouldn't sign her up for an elective religion course if it were outside of the standard school hours.

Kate Brown49 said:I agree, Jesse Cook4... My only takeaway is that if a kid wants to receive their sacraments (Communion and Confirmation), they basically have to take religious ed in school, plus church classes during the actual year they receive them. If I’m lucky and I’ve got this wrong, maybe I can just pull her out of the school program next year. 😬

Sacraments aren't mandatory, and neither is religious education.
I don't get why people who don't actually practice their faith are so obsessed with these rituals.
Is it just that "just in case, you never know" mentality? 🙂

Jason Ortiz5 said:The truth is, religious studies didn't get added through any official democratic process—it was just cheap political maneuvering.

It wasn't done illegally.

Jessica Kelly4 said:Sacraments aren't mandatory, and neither is religious education.
I don't get why people who don't actually practice their faith are so obsessed with these rituals.
Is it just that "just in case, you never know" mentality? 🙂

I totally see where you're coming from.
In many ways, receiving a sacrament has become part of our local American traditions (not that I'm saying that's the whole point).

So, even for those who aren't really religious, going to First Communion is tied to white dresses, flower crowns, fancy lunches, desserts, and gifts.
And everyone goes—well, maybe not everyone, but those few outliers are pretty much negligible.
Then comes Confirmation, which is also part of that cultural tradition involving pretty dresses, first Bibles, professional makeup, hair styling, and picking out your own godparents for the first time, followed by another lunch and more presents...
It’s basically a big social gathering, and everyone shows up (except for those few kids whose parents are punks, hippies, Buddhists, or old-school secularists...).

If you prevent a kid from socializing during religious ed classes, you're essentially cutting them out of the parade.
They end up standing out from the rest of the group.
It's not easy being the odd one out in the hallway for two hours a week, and what happens when everyone starts opening presents after the ceremony? What are you supposed to say then? 🤔

Back in my day, it was like joining the Scouts or those youth clubs that everyone joined.
Nowadays, First Communion and Confirmation have taken that spot—it's like the church stepped in to fill the role once held by those civic organizations.🤣

Still, there are differences, because while there are "declared non-believers," those few individuals per generation are such a tiny minority that they don't really stand out from the crowd of people who might not be strictly practicing but still follow the social norms.

And then there’s weddings.
Because you never know who a young person might choose to marry, it's probably good to have those sacraments sorted beforehand so everything is done properly. Plus, in many circles here, a wedding without the church isn't considered a "real" wedding. Add in the whole social aspect mentioned above, but now with even more expensive gifts!🥳

Susan James said:I totally see where you're coming from.
In many ways, receiving a sacrament has become part of our local American traditions (not that I'm saying that's the whole point).

So, even for those who aren't really religious, going to First Communion is tied to white dresses, flower crowns, fancy lunches, desserts, and gifts.
And everyone goes—well, maybe not everyone, but those few outliers are pretty much negligible.
Then comes Confirmation, which is also part of that cultural tradition involving pretty dresses, first Bibles, professional makeup, hair styling, and picking out your own godparents for the first time, followed by another lunch and more presents...
It’s basically a big social gathering, and everyone shows up (except for those few kids whose parents are punks, hippies, Buddhists, or old-school secularists...).

If you prevent a kid from socializing during religious ed classes, you're essentially cutting them out of the parade.
They end up standing out from the rest of the group.
It's not easy being the odd one out in the hallway for two hours a week, and what happens when everyone starts opening presents after the ceremony? What are you supposed to say then? 🤔

Back in my day, it was like joining the Scouts or those youth clubs that everyone joined.
Nowadays, First Communion and Confirmation have taken that spot—it's like the church stepped in to fill the role once held by those civic organizations.🤣

Still, there are differences, because while there are "declared non-believers," those few individuals per generation are such a tiny minority that they don't really stand out from the crowd of people who might not be strictly practicing but still follow the social norms.

And then there’s weddings.
Because you never know who a young person might choose to marry, it's probably good to have those sacraments sorted beforehand so everything is done properly. Plus, in many circles here, a wedding without the church isn't considered a "real" wedding. Add in the whole social aspect mentioned above, but now with even more expensive gifts!🥳

There it is. Plain and simple. I have zero desire to make my little girl feel like an outcast. I don't want her feeling like she doesn't fit in during those two hours every week in the pews, especially not at eight years old. I'm perfectly fine with her opting out of that whole "tradition" once she's old enough to realize that standing apart isn't a crime and deciding for herself that she doesn't care for the ritual.

We aren't interested in the gifts or the social status of being a godparent. Whether she takes communion or has a big wedding later is honestly too trivial for me to even put into words. If it matters to her, she can go through the motions when she's older. It’ll just be another sheep eventually wandering back to the fold.

Hypocritical to a fault? Sure, I know. 🥳

frozenrider15 said:There it is. Plain and simple. I have zero desire to make my little girl feel like an outcast. I don't want her feeling like she doesn't fit in during those two hours every week in the pews, especially not at eight years old. I'm perfectly fine with her opting out of that whole "tradition" once she's old enough to realize that standing apart isn't a crime and deciding for herself that she doesn't care for the ritual.

We aren't interested in the gifts or the social status of being a godparent. Whether she takes communion or has a big wedding later is honestly too trivial for me to even put into words. If it matters to her, she can go through the motions when she's older. It’ll just be another sheep eventually wandering back to the fold.

Hypocritical to a fault? Sure, I know. 🥳

Exactly what you just said.
A wedding shouldn't be an issue (it’s been brought up a few times). For a couple that isn't strictly Catholic, they can bend the rules or ignore them entirely with the right paperwork and permissions.

Susan James said:I totally see where you're coming from.
In many ways, receiving a sacrament has become part of our local American traditions (not that I'm saying that's the whole point).

So, even for those who aren't really religious, going to First Communion is tied to white dresses, flower crowns, fancy lunches, desserts, and gifts.
And everyone goes—well, maybe not everyone, but those few outliers are pretty much negligible.
Then comes Confirmation, which is also part of that cultural tradition involving pretty dresses, first Bibles, professional makeup, hair styling, and picking out your own godparents for the first time, followed by another lunch and more presents...
It’s basically a big social gathering, and everyone shows up (except for those few kids whose parents are punks, hippies, Buddhists, or old-school secularists...).

If you prevent a kid from socializing during religious ed classes, you're essentially cutting them out of the parade.
They end up standing out from the rest of the group.
It's not easy being the odd one out in the hallway for two hours a week, and what happens when everyone starts opening presents after the ceremony? What are you supposed to say then? 🤔

Back in my day, it was like joining the Scouts or those youth clubs that everyone joined.
Nowadays, First Communion and Confirmation have taken that spot—it's like the church stepped in to fill the role once held by those civic organizations.🤣

Still, there are differences, because while there are "declared non-believers," those few individuals per generation are such a tiny minority that they don't really stand out from the crowd of people who might not be strictly practicing but still follow the social norms.

And then there’s weddings.
Because you never know who a young person might choose to marry, it's probably good to have those sacraments sorted beforehand so everything is done properly. Plus, in many circles here, a wedding without the church isn't considered a "real" wedding. Add in the whole social aspect mentioned above, but now with even more expensive gifts!🥳

Fair point. It could be about culture or politics... I’ll accept that. God works in mysterious ways, as they say. Besides, you never know if someone following the formalities will eventually find a genuine internal calling.

But honestly, people shouldn't act shocked when the Church takes its own sacraments seriously. They shouldn't just let anyone take Communion or get Confirmed without understanding the weight of it, or walk down the aisle to marry without grasping what marriage actually means as a sacrament.

frozenrider15 said:There it is. Plain and simple. I have zero desire to make my little girl feel like an outcast. I don't want her feeling like she doesn't fit in during those two hours every week in the pews, especially not at eight years old. I'm perfectly fine with her opting out of that whole "tradition" once she's old enough to realize that standing apart isn't a crime and deciding for herself that she doesn't care for the ritual.

We aren't interested in the gifts or the social status of being a godparent. Whether she takes communion or has a big wedding later is honestly too trivial for me to even put into words. If it matters to her, she can go through the motions when she's older. It’ll just be another sheep eventually wandering back to the fold.

Hypocritical to a fault? Sure, I know. 🥳

Look, maybe I would have done the same. Why should she be left out in the hallway? If everyone else is going to the ceremony, why not just let her go through the motions now and decide later?

But she refused. My last attempt at an argument was telling her she could just go to the service... to which she told me that the whole thing means absolutely nothing to her and she doesn't see the point at all. She even said it doesn't mean anything to her friends either—they all just go because of the presents they get.
And she doesn't want us wasting money or throwing a huge party based on something that holds zero significance for her. She said if she ever wants a gift, she'll just ask, and we can buy it for her then.
As for the religious stuff, she can handle that later in life if it actually ends up meaning something to her.

So, I just let her off the hook like a good, obedient parent.😬

I haven't seen any posts from Mestar yet! Looking forward to seeing what they have to share once they jump in. kaže:
You know, you've got a point there. There could definitely be deeper reasons at play, like cultural identity or even politics... I can respect that. As the old saying goes, God works in mysterious ways. Besides, you never really know if that kind of formality might eventually lead someone to discover their true calling from within.

Honestly, people really shouldn't be surprised that the Church takes its sacraments so seriously. It just makes sense. You can't expect someone to go through Communion or Confirmation without actually understanding the weight behind them, or to get married without fully grasping what marriage means as a sacred commitment. To me, it’s all about intention and being mindful of the significance of these milestones.

I wish I could have been there to write this myself—right there in the thick of it, typing away from the perspective of a true believer. 🙏
If you ask me, I’d say this: we can never know for sure, but we can always hold onto hope. If we really lean into the momentum of the crowd and stay consistently present in the conversation, there's a chance someone will truly connect with what we're doing.

And then you have those people on the inside who think they’ve somehow "tripped up" or messed things up. They act like it's some deep spiritual crisis involving Jesus, but honestly? It has nothing to do with faith. To really get things moving, you have to tap into that internal drive—the stuff like accountability, a little bit of healthy shame, or even just the weight of past mistakes and bad reviews. You need that internal pressure to actually spark change.
Numbers matter. If we can show that such a huge number of people actually practice their faith—I'm talking about the practical side, like all the parents enrolling their kids in religious education classes—then we have every right to ask the government for support. We’re talking about funding for churches, salaries for priests, and those dedicated chaplains who visit people in hospitals. It also covers training for educators, the universities that prepare them, and even the cost of printing textbooks. You never know who might be swayed by faith, so as long as these institutions are part of our community, they deserve the resources to stay active.
🙂🍿

Jessica Kelly4 said:It wasn't done illegally.

And it certainly wasn't done in any civilized or democratic way, either. But honestly, that kind of making excuses is just classic for religious folks—there’s always some way to justify it, or they claim everyone else is the one being unfair or overreacting.

Why can't a kid receive the sacraments if they attend church classes instead of religious ed at school? 🤔
Does this mean if someone decides at age 20 they want to make their First Communion, they’re out of luck? Or do they have to take the school version? The church version?
How does the process actually work?

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N/A, I don't have an answer for any of your questions, though I honestly can't wrap my head around why. Why can't a kid just go to church for religious studies and receive their sacraments 🙂? Doesn't the whole thing sound a bit off to everyone above? Jeez 😠🙂 🙂 I'm dropping out of this thread because this whole situation is just getting on my nerves

Brenda Doyle5 said:Why can't a kid receive the sacraments if they attend church classes instead of religious ed at school? 🤔
Does this mean if someone decides at age 20 they want to make their First Communion, they’re out of luck? Or do they have to take the school version? The church version?
How does the process actually work?

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy using Reddit

From what I’ve been told, the Church welcomes members at any stage of life, so it’s definitely possible. I’ve actually heard plenty of personal stories about people doing exactly that—whether it’s getting baptized at 33, completing all their sacraments right before walking down the aisle, or stepping up to be a godparent. It really is an open door for everyone.

And who knows? They might even have to enroll in night school just to pass their religion class. 🤔You know, it’s kind of wild—anyone who graduated high school back in 1997 actually has to retake their high school equivalency exams if they decide they want to head off to college in their 40s. It’s one of those funny little hurdles you don't expect when you're looking to start a new chapter later in life!

I find this whole situation kind of freaky. If the church says kids need both school religion classes and Sunday school to receive their sacraments, then parents who actually value their faith—especially those facing their final days—should probably just embrace it. They should be encouraging their kids to go, or at least not making such a fuss about it.
It’s always so easy to play devil's advocate with someone else's beliefs or struggles, isn't it? But the second our own comfort zone gets poked, we suddenly stop being so casual and dismissive...

Brenda Doyle5 said:Why can't a kid receive the sacraments if they attend church classes instead of religious ed at school? 🤔
Does this mean if someone decides at age 20 they want to make their First Communion, they’re out of luck? Or do they have to take the school version? The church version?
How does the process actually work?

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy using Reddit

Anyone wanting to go through with their sacraments has to sit through the prep first.
Kids get religious ed, adults get... whatever you want to call it these days.
Every Monday night at my local parish, it's always the same thing. Right now we've got six people showing up... including this one grandpa coming to prep for First Communion who's gotta be over 80 years old... 😍

Jason Ortiz5 said:And it certainly wasn't done in any civilized or democratic way, either. But honestly, that kind of making excuses is just classic for religious folks—there’s always some way to justify it, or they claim everyone else is the one being unfair or overreacting.

Exactly how they do things in modern democracies. You can scrap it without a referendum just by making a political call to terminate an international treaty based on the established rules.

Brenda Doyle5 said:Why can't a kid receive the sacraments if they attend church classes instead of religious ed at school? 🤔
Does this mean if someone decides at age 20 they want to make their First Communion, they’re out of luck? Or do they have to take the school version? The church version?
How does the process actually work?

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy using Reddit

It comes down to two things: first, both parents and the child need to actually understand what the sacrament represents—since the Church views these as unchanging milestones—and second, they have to actually live out the faith. Living the faith means being part of the community. Since school religion classes were introduced, parish-based instruction has shifted its focus entirely. They complement each other, sure, but they aren't the same thing.

Susan James said:From what I’ve been told, the Church welcomes members at any stage of life, so it’s definitely possible. I’ve actually heard plenty of personal stories about people doing exactly that—whether it’s getting baptized at 33, completing all their sacraments right before walking down the aisle, or stepping up to be a godparent. It really is an open door for everyone.

And who knows? They might even have to enroll in night school just to pass their religion class. 🤔You know, it’s kind of wild—anyone who graduated high school back in 1997 actually has to retake their high school equivalency exams if they decide they want to head off to college in their 40s. It’s one of those funny little hurdles you don't expect when you're looking to start a new chapter later in life!

A person's metaphysical foundation goes way beyond just church formalities. It involves one's personal relationship with God, sin, repentance, and divine providence in both individual lives and history itself...

Those formalities still matter for organized action and for passing down the spiritual insights gained by countless exceptional individuals who reached higher and saw further throughout history. That’s how any organized—especially institutionalized—human endeavor works. The Church's experience is unparalleled. No other organization can even come close to twenty centuries of continuous existence. Not the government, not a kingdom, not JP Morgan, not a massive corporation... nothing. It's hard for the human mind to wrap itself around what twenty centuries of continuity actually means. The Church is built on several pillars, and the sacraments are one of them. Period.

Jessica Kelly4 said:Exactly how they do things in modern democracies. You can scrap it without a referendum just by making a political call to terminate an international treaty based on the established rules.

So why is it that religious folks always seem to troll about the "will of the majority" or demand a referendum whenever they don't get their way?

Jason Ortiz5 said:So why is it that religious folks always seem to troll about the "will of the majority" or demand a referendum whenever they don't get their way?

Because the majority's will is expressed either through the actions of an elected political party or via a referendum if a specific interest group thinks that's their best shot at getting what they want.