Home › Lifestyle › Health ›
Resources and support for families dealing with cancer and serious illness
Resources and support for families dealing with cancer and serious illness
Started by Angela Wright · · 👁 229 views · 3K replies
#1862 ·
mellowbadger5 said:I’ve been lurking here for quite a while now. Mostly, I just feel helpless because of how little I know. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with microcellular lung cancer. After four rounds of chemo, they actually stopped treatment because her follow-up showed the tumor was in remission. She was supposed to be recovering—maybe even head down to Miami for a bit—but then things took a turn for the worse. Now she’s back at Jordanovac getting chemo and she feels terrible. She's dealing with body cramps, weakness, constipation, and nothing seems to be helping. She’s using Heder Propolis, royal jelly, and drinking whey since the hospital staff suggested it. I’m honestly glad this place exists where we can actually learn something, because doctors tend to say so little. I wish we didn't have to be here at all and that we could finally beat cancer once and for all.
Dear mellowbadger5 ,I'm rooting for you guys. Sending you all the strength and grit in the world! Whenever things get heavy, reach out... This forum and all these amazing people are what give me the fuel to keep pushing forward.🙂 We used to give my dad whey for a while too, but then I read online that it can mess with blood counts, so I wouldn't really recommend it. 🙄 Maybe once in a blue moon, but not as a staple.
Hey Melissa Kim45,I am so happy I can finally read some good news this Monday morning!! I’m seriously thrilled for you and your mom.😍
Hang in there, everyone. We’re stronger together.👍
#1863 ·
Linda Campbell said:First off, I am so incredibly happy to hear about your mom—truly, from the bottom of my heart. Second, I just wanted to say thanks for your posts. No matter what’s going on, they always manage to make me laugh. Honestly, props to you for keeping your sense of humor through all this crap you're dealing with. Seriously, mad respect. Hang in there, wishing you nothing but the best.
I’m right there with Linda Campbell on this one! Melissa Kim45, I was thinking about you again this weekend because we had this whole hilarious episode involving my mom and a cake. I won't go into the gritty details because I don't want to sound like I'm making fun of my poor, sick mom. But hey, maybe I'll write it all down sometime...😁
Hey, and welcome to all the new faces on the forum. Please, vent about whatever is eating at you; I guarantee you'll feel at least a little bit better once it's out there. And that counts for something.
#1864 ·
Hi everyone!
I noticed that mellowbadger5 mentioned her mother-in-law drinks buttermilk, and I really wanted to chime in and say how great that is. Buttermilk is absolutely incredible for liver regeneration, especially when it's being hit hard by heavy medications.
It also has such a fantastic mineral profile that it’s practically impossible to go wrong with it.
🙂
I noticed that mellowbadger5 mentioned her mother-in-law drinks buttermilk, and I really wanted to chime in and say how great that is. Buttermilk is absolutely incredible for liver regeneration, especially when it's being hit hard by heavy medications.
It also has such a fantastic mineral profile that it’s practically impossible to go wrong with it.
🙂
#1865 ·
Carol Ramirez;11589845 said:Hey everyone!
I saw mellowbadger5 mention her mother-in-law drinks buttermilk, and I really wanted to give her props for that. Buttermilk is absolute gold for liver regeneration, especially when it’s being hammered by heavy medications.
Plus, the mineral profile is phenomenal—it’s hard to go wrong with it.
Thanx, Carol Ramirez 🙂
My dad used to drink buttermilk every single day during the second week of his break between chemo rounds, but his blood work was looking pretty rough. Then I stumbled onto something online saying you shouldn't overdo it because it can mess with your blood counts, so we figured that might be the culprit and decided to cut it out..🤷 ,even though I know it's generally super healthy,🙂
#1866 ·
I have a quick request—can anyone tell me what actually works to prevent constipation? I know what the standard advice is for healthy people, but after chemo, things change. My mother-in-law has been drinking Bekunis and mineral water, trying to eat a varied diet, but her digestive system just seems to have completely stalled out. It got so bad she actually had to go into the hospital to get an enema.
#1867 ·
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. 😘
mellowbadger5, that is such a tough situation. There are tablets (and suppositories)—I can't recall the exact names right now, though I could go take a look—that are pretty well-known, but honestly, it’s better if those are treated as a last resort. The real issue is that after a few days, everything just turns to stone, and then it becomes a nightmare; sometimes it feels physically impossible to pass anything at all, especially that first movement after things get stuck. 😁 Bekunis works well, and those fruit gummies—the ones from CVS—are good too, but as you mentioned, diet really is the key. Something like a cleansing tea worked for my mom, but only a couple of times before it stopped being effective.
If I’m following you correctly, the medication (including the stuff for nausea) causes everything to just lock up higher up, so there’s really no point in forcing suppositories during that phase; they’ll just end up getting pushed right back out while the hardened waste stays stuck above. It’s better to clear the path first with Bekunis or perhaps some tea or tablets if it's absolutely necessary, and then once you feel like something might actually move, use a suppository to help it slide through. Give it about thirty minutes to an hour, and then you'll see some progress. 👋 😁
Right now, I’m thinking of the standard glycerin suppositories; I always keep those on hand at home.
I went to check. It was Dulcolax. But again, I have to say, I try to make sure that remains a final option. The concern is if she gets a sudden bout of diarrhea and loses too much fluid due to electrolyte imbalance, though with my mom, that tendency is quite pronounced; for some people, it isn't quite as dangerous, you just have to be careful about staying hydrated.
Yogurt is great, and you can easily mix in some flaxseed plus flaxseed oil. It felt to me like those (much like the fruit gummies) are more for maintenance. When those heavy medications cause a blockage, it's much easier to manage if there aren't several days' worth of hardened "backlog" 😁 sitting in the intestines.
That’s just how I handle it, though I honestly don't know if it's truly the best way.
mellowbadger5, that is such a tough situation. There are tablets (and suppositories)—I can't recall the exact names right now, though I could go take a look—that are pretty well-known, but honestly, it’s better if those are treated as a last resort. The real issue is that after a few days, everything just turns to stone, and then it becomes a nightmare; sometimes it feels physically impossible to pass anything at all, especially that first movement after things get stuck. 😁 Bekunis works well, and those fruit gummies—the ones from CVS—are good too, but as you mentioned, diet really is the key. Something like a cleansing tea worked for my mom, but only a couple of times before it stopped being effective.
If I’m following you correctly, the medication (including the stuff for nausea) causes everything to just lock up higher up, so there’s really no point in forcing suppositories during that phase; they’ll just end up getting pushed right back out while the hardened waste stays stuck above. It’s better to clear the path first with Bekunis or perhaps some tea or tablets if it's absolutely necessary, and then once you feel like something might actually move, use a suppository to help it slide through. Give it about thirty minutes to an hour, and then you'll see some progress. 👋 😁
Right now, I’m thinking of the standard glycerin suppositories; I always keep those on hand at home.
I went to check. It was Dulcolax. But again, I have to say, I try to make sure that remains a final option. The concern is if she gets a sudden bout of diarrhea and loses too much fluid due to electrolyte imbalance, though with my mom, that tendency is quite pronounced; for some people, it isn't quite as dangerous, you just have to be careful about staying hydrated.
Yogurt is great, and you can easily mix in some flaxseed plus flaxseed oil. It felt to me like those (much like the fruit gummies) are more for maintenance. When those heavy medications cause a blockage, it's much easier to manage if there aren't several days' worth of hardened "backlog" 😁 sitting in the intestines.
That’s just how I handle it, though I honestly don't know if it's truly the best way.
#1868 ·
Melissa Kim45, thanks for the input. We’re going to try incorporating some yogurt and flaxseeds alongside everything else we're doing—I totally agree that those little suppositories should be our absolute last resort. Sending my best to everyone!
#1869 ·
By the way, I always go with ground flaxseed. Ideally, you’d want to grind it right before you eat it to get the full benefit, but I usually just pick up the pre-ground stuff at the store.
The thing is, staying hydrated can be such a chore for some people, though I find if you really dress up a salad with enough oil, it helps things move along.
If you can manage it, try to get her to drink plenty of fluids, and steer clear of heavy, greasy meals. Instead, just adding a good splash of olive oil or flaxseed oil to her salads should do the trick; I truly believe that's a healthy way to help with these kinds of issues.
The thing is, staying hydrated can be such a chore for some people, though I find if you really dress up a salad with enough oil, it helps things move along.
If you can manage it, try to get her to drink plenty of fluids, and steer clear of heavy, greasy meals. Instead, just adding a good splash of olive oil or flaxseed oil to her salads should do the trick; I truly believe that's a healthy way to help with these kinds of issues.
#1872 ·
I'll shoot you a DM. They aren't exactly expensive. 👍
You can find flaxseed oil at any local health food store. Just a heads-up though, once you crack that seal, you really need to finish it within a week, so keep it tucked away in the fridge.
It’s not exactly dirt cheap, but it won't break the bank either.
You can find flaxseed oil at any local health food store. Just a heads-up though, once you crack that seal, you really need to finish it within a week, so keep it tucked away in the fridge.
It’s not exactly dirt cheap, but it won't break the bank either.
#1873 ·
mellowbadger5 said:I have a quick favor—can anyone tell me what actually works to prevent constipation? I know the usual advice, but after chemo, things change. My mother-in-law has been drinking Bekunis tea, taking Donat, and eating a varied diet, but her system just stalled out so hard she had to end up at the hospital for an enema.
If all that stuff doesn't do the trick, try Senna tea—it’s honestly great for these kinds of issues. Just have about a cup in the evening. You can find it at any local pharmacy, and it won't break the bank. Hang in there.
#1874 ·
Thank you so much for all the kind words of support from everyone who reached out. Honestly, I've been feeling pretty rough these last few days, and I can't help but feel a bit anxious about whether I'll have to go under the knife again—things have gotten a little complicated lately. I just can't seem to shake this abscess forming under my liver, though it's definitely much smaller than it was after the first surgery. This Friday, I’m finally heading in to finalize my chemo schedule, which is adding to the whole stressful mess. Reading through so many posts here, it seems like everyone dealt with such awful side effects, and I'm honestly terrified of how I'll manage it all... but I know I have to. My biggest wish is just to hold on long enough to see my son graduate. With the way things are going, three years feels like a lot, and I really hope I get to see that happen... I don't want to be a jinx...
Stay strong, everyone fighting for your loved ones. As for us patients, we're just going to keep pushing through, one day at a time... hoping for a little more happiness ahead. Sending love to everyone, and my deepest sympathies to those who have lost someone...
Stay strong, everyone fighting for your loved ones. As for us patients, we're just going to keep pushing through, one day at a time... hoping for a little more happiness ahead. Sending love to everyone, and my deepest sympathies to those who have lost someone...
#1875 ·
Nancy Thomas18 said:Thanks to everyone who sent such kind words of support—it really means a lot. To be honest, these last few days have been rough. I’ve been feeling pretty awful, and honestly, the anxiety is starting to kick in because I’m worried I might have to go under the knife again. Things have gotten complicated. I just can't seem to shake this abscess forming under my liver, though it is much smaller now than it was after the first surgery. This Friday, I finally head in to set my chemo schedule, and the whole thing is just a massive headache. Reading through all these posts, it seems like everyone deals with some pretty horrific side effects, and I’m terrified of how I’ll manage it all—but I know I don't have a choice. My biggest wish is just to hold on long enough to see my son graduate. He’s only three years old... there's still a lifetime ahead of him, and I truly hope I get to see that happen. I refuse to believe I'm that unlucky.
Hang in there, everyone fighting for the people they love. For those of us dealing with this, we just have to keep scrapping our way through, one day at a time... hoping for better days ahead. Sending my best to everyone, and my deepest condolences to those who have lost loved ones.
I want you to know I'm standing right there with you in this fight. Stay brave. Just keep thinking about your son and that love you have for him—that's what's going to carry you through the coming days. Hang in there!
#1876 ·
Nancy Thomas18 said:Thanks for all the kind words of support from everyone who reached out. Honestly, these last few days have been rough—I've been feeling pretty lousy, and I'm starting to get a bit anxious about whether I'll need another surgery. Things have gotten complicated again. I just can't seem to shake this abscess forming under my liver, though it's way smaller now than it was after the first operation. On Friday, I'm finally going in to set my chemo schedule, so that whole situation is stressing me out. Reading through so many posts here, it seems like everyone deals with horrible side effects, and I'm scared of how I'll handle it—but I know I have to. My biggest wish is just to live long enough to see my son graduate. He’s only three years away from finishing, so hopefully, I'll make it to that milestone. I'm not that unlucky, right?
Hang in there, everyone fighting for the ones you love. We patients just have to grit our teeth and take it one day at a time... aiming for a little more happiness ahead. Sending love to everyone, and my deepest sympathies to those who have lost loved ones.
You're going to be there to see your son graduate, get married, and everything else... You've gotta stay positive, believe me, it makes a huge difference. When I got sick, my daughter was only 3, and it never even crossed my mind that I might die—I'm already planning on looking after my grandkids. And let me tell you, not everyone gets hit with brutal side effects from chemo. I couldn't eat and felt terrible for about 10 days after mine, but after that, I bounced back to "normal" before the next round started. I met a lady at the University Hospital who's become a dear friend; she went through 30 rounds of chemo and didn't even need to stay in bed after them. She handled it like she was just taking an antibiotic, not some toxic poison. Plus, she had breast, bone, and liver cancer and was basically written off 4 years ago—now, she just has a tiny scar on her liver. So, don't give up. You'll get through this chemo just fine and watch your son at his graduation, no worries. Crossing my fingers for you and wishing you nothing but the best!👍
#1877 ·
shadowheron4 said:You’re going to live long enough to see your son graduate, get married, and all that good stuff... Seriously, you have to stay positive—trust me, it makes a massive difference. When I first got sick, my daughter was only three years old, and honestly, the thought of dying never even crossed my mind. Nope. I’m already planning out how I'm going to babysit my grandkids. And look, let me tell you—not everyone gets absolutely wrecked by the side effects after chemo. For me, yeah, I couldn't eat and felt like garbage for about ten days after each round, but then I’d somehow manage to get back into "fighting shape" before the next one. I met this lady at the University Hospital who’s become a dear friend of mine—she went through 30 rounds of chemo, and she wasn't even bedridden after any of them. She handled it like she was just taking an antibiotic or something, rather than actual poison. On top of that, she had breast, bone, and liver cancer, and doctors had basically written her off four years ago... now? She’s just left with a tiny little scar on her liver. So, don't give up. You’re going to get through this chemo just fine, and you'll be right there watching your son walk across that stage at graduation without a worry in the world. Fingers crossed for you—sending nothing but the best vibes!👍
Nice work.
That’s exactly how it should be. When I first got sick, my son was only 8—and honestly, I still plan on holding my grandkids in my arms one day. I went through 8 rounds of chemo, and I actually took sick leave for the first 4... but even then, I felt pretty good. Just some nausea and that nasty taste in my mouth, but nothing I couldn't handle. For the next 4 rounds? I was literally powering through on pure grit. Therapy on Friday, trying to recover on Saturday and Sunday, and then right back to work on Monday. A year has passed since then, and here I am—working and functioning like a totally normal human being...
Honestly, I feel like it says a lot about who you really are... Most people, once they find out what kind of illness they're actually dealing with, just head straight home and lie down to die.
Giving up is the absolute worst. Honestly, I’m a big believer in those little signs the body throws at you—I actually listen to them, and thanks to that, I caught my cancer when it was still in the super early stages. At the end of the day, your psychology is everything in this fight. You just can't let yourself buckle...
Nothing new to report from me, really—just felt like tossing some of my random thoughts out there for you all to chew on...
#1878 ·
Nancy Thomas18 said:I just wanted to say thank you so much for all the lovely words of support from everyone who reached out to me. Honestly, these last few days have been such a struggle, and I’ve been feeling pretty anxious about whether I’ll have to go under the knife again because things have gotten a little complicated. I just can't seem to get rid of this abscess forming under my liver, though thankfully it's much smaller now than it was after that first surgery. This Friday, I’m finally heading in to set my chemotherapy schedule, and honestly, the whole situation is just overwhelming. Reading through so many posts here, it seems like everyone goes through such terrible side effects, and I’m really scared about how I’m going to manage it all, but I know I have to. My biggest wish right now is just to live long enough to see my son graduate. If I can hold on for him, then three more years isn't asking for too much, right? I really hope I can make that happen—I don't want to be a jinx!
Hang in there, everyone fighting for those they love most; we patients just have to keep wrestling our way through, one day at a time... pushing toward a little bit of happiness. Sending love to everyone, and my deepest sympathies to those of you who have lost someone.
Hey! First things first: there is NO GIVING UP! My mom is actually fighting breast cancer right now, and she just wrapped up her eight rounds of chemo without any major side effects at all. We were fully expecting much worse complications, honestly! She feels a little wiped out for the first couple of days, maybe wanting to stay in bed for a day or two, but the rest of the week she’s out walking around the park, hitting the city, and hanging out with her girlfriends... I totally get why the thought of chemo is freaking you out, but please try not to let the fear take over. Almost every side effect can be managed. Hang in there and keep checking in with us! NO GIVING UP! Kisses!😉
#1879 ·
Nancy Thomas18 said:Thanks for all the kind words of support from those who reached out. To be honest, I’ve been feeling pretty terrible these past few days, and the anxiety is starting to set in—wondering if I’ll have to go under the knife again because things have gotten complicated. I just can't seem to shake this abscess forming under my liver, though it's significantly smaller now than it was after the first surgery. This Friday, I'm finally heading in to schedule my chemo sessions, so the stress is hitting a peak. Reading through so many posts, it seems like everyone deals with horrific side effects, and I’m terrified of how I'll manage, but I know I have to. My biggest wish is just to live long enough to see my son graduate. If I can make it through that, then three more years of life isn't asking for much; I really hope that dream comes true, I don't want to be a jinx.
Hang in there, everyone fighting for your loved ones. For us patients, we just have to grit our teeth and fight through it, one day at a time... pushing toward a little more happiness. Sending my best to you all, and my deepest condolences to anyone who has lost someone.
Listen, believe me when I say there is a way through every single situation. You have to hold onto the belief that you will recover. Instead of picturing your son's graduation, try visualizing holding your great-grandchild in your arms. The power of suggestion is incredibly potent, and you shouldn't underestimate it. Losing this battle isn't even an option for you. Losing the fight doesn't exist!
Regarding the chemo, you need to make sure you have some kind of support system to drive you and stay by your side. I don't know if you have friends or family besides your son who can dedicate themselves to you like that. If not, you can call Hospice and ask for help. They can provide a volunteer who will step in whenever you need, drive you to chemo, and stay with you as long as necessary. There was a period when I was alone with my mom while she could still walk, but she kept falling; I had a volunteer living nearby, so whenever my mom went down, the woman would jump in her car and be there in a flash to help me get her back up.
Give them a call and arrange some assistance. They operate on a volunteer basis, and their help is free of charge.
#1880 ·
[gentlemoose62 says:
On Monday, I'm taking my results to the oncology board to decide our next steps. It'll probably be more chemo since they can't radiate my pelvic area anymore—it's reached its maximum limit...Vasa din
I really hope you and the medical board have put together the perfect "battle plan." Whatever they decide, I'm crossing my fingers for a loooooong remission for you!
If you've been checking the forum lately, you know I've been fighting ovarian cancer since 2001 too. I've gone through three surgeries and nine rounds of chemo—every 21 days, or 12 weeks...
I've been in remission since 2003, at least according to my markers, which stay steady between 2 and 7. My check-up is coming up soon, so I've started overthinking everything again...but you know how it goes! What worries me is whether I'm actually being monitored properly. Right now, every six months it's just CA125 and a pelvic exam, maybe a transvaginal ultrasound here and there.
No PET, CT, or MRI scans. They tell me... only if the markers start rising. I was wondering, are you perhaps being treated at MD Anderson Cancer Center? What kind of follow-ups did you have during your four-year remission? And did your markers spike with every recurrence? For me, they always have, so maybe that's why they focus so much on them. I don't know, but it really eats at me... what if something starts somewhere far away and the marker doesn't catch it!
My "sentence" is a little shorter than yours, but I'd love to help you out with my own experience if I can.
For now, all I can give you is one veeeery big hug. Hang in there!
On Monday, I'm taking my results to the oncology board to decide our next steps. It'll probably be more chemo since they can't radiate my pelvic area anymore—it's reached its maximum limit...Vasa din
I really hope you and the medical board have put together the perfect "battle plan." Whatever they decide, I'm crossing my fingers for a loooooong remission for you!
If you've been checking the forum lately, you know I've been fighting ovarian cancer since 2001 too. I've gone through three surgeries and nine rounds of chemo—every 21 days, or 12 weeks...
I've been in remission since 2003, at least according to my markers, which stay steady between 2 and 7. My check-up is coming up soon, so I've started overthinking everything again...but you know how it goes! What worries me is whether I'm actually being monitored properly. Right now, every six months it's just CA125 and a pelvic exam, maybe a transvaginal ultrasound here and there.
No PET, CT, or MRI scans. They tell me... only if the markers start rising. I was wondering, are you perhaps being treated at MD Anderson Cancer Center? What kind of follow-ups did you have during your four-year remission? And did your markers spike with every recurrence? For me, they always have, so maybe that's why they focus so much on them. I don't know, but it really eats at me... what if something starts somewhere far away and the marker doesn't catch it!
My "sentence" is a little shorter than yours, but I'd love to help you out with my own experience if I can.
For now, all I can give you is one veeeery big hug. Hang in there!
🔗 Similar threads
- Dealing with "too close" family dynamics in Couples Life · Jul 30, 2026
- The fine line between a "party trick" and a serious legal issue in Law · Jul 30, 2026
- Does a player's off-court baggage change how you support them? in Fans · Jul 30, 2026
- Is local rivalry killing any sense of community support? in Off-topic · Jul 30, 2026
- When do "supporting" a team actually become toxic? in Parenting & Kids · Jul 29, 2026