Schizophrenia - General Discussion

Richard White8 said:And who is going to find it? It remains a mystery. Funding for psychiatric research is negligible. All the capital flows directly into cancer research, and even then, we haven't seen significant breakthroughs beyond standard chemotherapy and radiation.

Look, Burzynski actually found effective treatments for certain types of cancer, which is exactly why the FDA and the big players "researching" cures tried so hard to throw him in prison for life. When that didn't work, they moved on to faking research data. When even that failed, they tried to hijack his patents. And when they couldn't pull that off either, they finally allowed his treatment to be used—but only on the condition that chemotherapy fails first. 🤣
The medical establishment cares deeply about our health, clearly.

Raymond Walker5 said:Look, Burzynski actually found effective treatments for certain types of cancer, which is exactly why the FDA and the big players "researching" cures tried so hard to throw him in prison for life. When that didn't work, they moved on to faking research data. When even that failed, they tried to hijack his patents. And when they couldn't pull that off either, they finally allowed his treatment to be used—but only on the condition that chemotherapy fails first. 🤣
The medical establishment cares deeply about our health, clearly.

Precisely. They claim to have spent 90 billion on cancer research so far. Then you have the pharmaceutical industry and the lobbyists. Take psychotropic drugs, for instance; these newer antipsychotics are an expensive way to deal with mental issues. One box of 30 pills costs a hundred dollars. And this Merck product—in the US, they call it Abilify and market it on TV as an adjunct therapy for depression. In America, the consumption of antipsychotics has surged by 100% over the last 15 years. Psychiatrists there prescribe antipsychotics for everything from anxiety to insomnia to god knows what else.

And companies like Pfizer and Eli Lilly make massive profits off this.

Pfizer also rakes it in producing Merck (aripiprazole). I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the pharmacy receipt—Merck— $217!!! Unbelievable..

Richard White8 said:Precisely. They claim to have spent 90 billion on cancer research so far. Then you have the pharmaceutical industry and the lobbyists. Take psychotropic drugs, for instance; these newer antipsychotics are an expensive way to deal with mental issues. One box of 30 pills costs a hundred dollars. And this Merck product—in the US, they call it Abilify and market it on TV as an adjunct therapy for depression. In America, the consumption of antipsychotics has surged by 100% over the last 15 years. Psychiatrists there prescribe antipsychotics for everything from anxiety to insomnia to god knows what else.

And companies like Pfizer and Eli Lilly make massive profits off this.

Pfizer also rakes it in producing Merck (aripiprazole). I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the pharmacy receipt—Merck— $217!!! Unbelievable..

If our local politicians have spent the last quarter-century proving how effectively they can run a country into the ground, I struggle to see why that same "philosophy" wouldn't apply to the higher tiers, like the pharmaceutical industry. Given that John Virapen himself worked in pharma for decades and pulled back the curtain on how things actually operate there, I find myself being extremely skeptical of everything now. I didn't believe much before, but his book really solidified that distrust for me. In this kind of cutthroat capitalism, there isn't really any concept of honesty; there are only buyers and sellers. And in this world, healthy customers aren't considered good customers.

I am not some kind of troublemaker, people; I really am a decent kid 🧐

Lord, help us all... 🙂

Raymond Walker5 said:If our local politicians have spent the last quarter-century proving how effectively they can run a country into the ground, I struggle to see why that same "philosophy" wouldn't apply to the higher tiers, like the pharmaceutical industry. Given that John Virapen himself worked in pharma for decades and pulled back the curtain on how things actually operate there, I find myself being extremely skeptical of everything now. I didn't believe much before, but his book really solidified that distrust for me. In this kind of cutthroat capitalism, there isn't really any concept of honesty; there are only buyers and sellers. And in this world, healthy customers aren't considered good customers.

Prescribing antipsychotics for anxiety is a total disaster. It’s all about profit margins because Xanax has become far too cheap. I’ll have to look into this John Doe guy; I haven't heard of him.

Richard White8 said:No one in my immediate or extended family has ever suffered from schizophrenia or psychosis. I developed it out of thin air. Well, not exactly out of thin air—it was more gradual. It started with intense anxiety, social phobia, and a fear of people lasting several years—and then suddenly, the voices and auditory hallucinations arrived. Regarding schizophrenia, hallucinations are the primary symptom, along with disorganized speech. But psychiatric diagnoses aren't like an MRI or a blood test. Multiple psychiatrists can change the diagnosis for a single patient. One will say it is schizophrenia, while another will claim it isn't. There was actually a recent trial involving someone who committed murder under the influence of voices. They conducted a forensic psychiatric evaluation.
Psychiatrists fought among themselves. One expert testified that he had diminished capacity; another insisted he didn't. Ultimately, that individual received 25 years in prison for murder.
They simply lack a definitive instrument for assessment. Most of what they learn comes from what the patient tells them and what the surrounding environment reveals about their behavior. They observe things through conversation with the patient—how they speak, how they think. The whole thing is built on shaky ground.
You could walk into a psychiatrist's office and tell them you suffer from depression, that you can't get out of bed, that you hear voices, and that you want to end your life. They will hand you a diagnosis of severe depressive episode with psychotic symptoms. And a pile of medication. You don't have to take them. You could repeat that you are suffering from depression for ten years straight and apply for Social Security disability benefits. They have no way to measure depression or verify whether the medication is actually working.

I actually believe that things in psychiatry are much more measurable than people think. Just the other day, I was reading about a patient in either England or the USA who was seeing a female psychiatrist. As their sessions progressed, this woman developed an intense bond with her doctor, and the doctor felt the exact same way about her. This connection manifested as a profound maternal transference and countertransference.

The doctor actually presented this case openly at some symposium or conference, and they performed MRIs on both her brain and the patient's brain to see how they reacted while talking to one another or discussing shared interests. It turns out that the doctor's brain responded in the exact same pattern as a mother's brain does when interacting with her young child.

For the life of me, I can't find the link to that article again. Does anyone feel like googling this
?

Nicole Barrett76 said:I actually believe that things in psychiatry are much more measurable than people think. Just the other day, I was reading about a patient in either England or the USA who was seeing a female psychiatrist. As their sessions progressed, this woman developed an intense bond with her doctor, and the doctor felt the exact same way about her. This connection manifested as a profound maternal transference and countertransference.

The doctor actually presented this case openly at some symposium or conference, and they performed MRIs on both her brain and the patient's brain to see how they reacted while talking to one another or discussing shared interests. It turns out that the doctor's brain responded in the exact same pattern as a mother's brain does when interacting with her young child.

For the life of me, I can't find the link to that article again. Does anyone feel like googling this
?

Interesting. If that's the case, they should start incorporating it into psychiatric diagnosis. Right now, how do they diagnose? Through conversation, observation, intuition.
Then they send you for psychological testing. But once those results come back, the psychiatrist doesn't even bother reviewing them. They just skim them and continue doing exactly what they were going to do anyway.

My own psychiatrist told me repeatedly that she is limited in everything, especially when it comes to prescribing medication. She claimed she has no actual instruments to measure anything and that she’s basically picking drugs blindly, like a blind hen pecking for grain.

Why don't they use brain scans like that for someone sentenced to 25 years for murder committed under the influence of auditory hallucinations? The forensic experts couldn't agree on a diagnosis, so he went straight to prison. He might have actually been ill, or he might have been faking it.

Richard White8 said:Exactly, and these heavy medications just drain your body. You need to eat plenty of vitamins and fruit, which I don't do. I supplement heavily with vitamins, Omega-3, magnesium, and curcumin. I definitely have less energy than I did before starting the meds. These drugs cause excessive sleepiness, yet sometimes you can't sleep at all. They have downsides, certainly, but they have upsides too. In my case, the medication had its benefits. Psychiatrists know their stuff, but if any of them had actually lived through psychosis and taken these drugs themselves, they might think differently. And honestly, with these diagnoses, functioning is hard enough, let alone working. Why doesn't the government provide some form of assistance or disability support? I wouldn't even dare ask to be declared disabled; what would happen to me then?
In England, people receive social assistance if they are over 330 pounds or have certain illnesses, and the state helps them. But here in America, you have to hide the fact that you were ever sick. If you show up for a job interview and mention you've dealt with psychosis or schizophrenia, your chances of getting hired are zero. It’s easiest for those working at state institutions. Luckily, a friend of mine works at a university, so no one can fault him for being ill or fire him for it. But if you work for a private company and end up in the psych ward three times in a year, you'd be fired on the spot.

It's not like we chose this. Who in their right mind would choose mental illness? If you're treating cancer, everyone is full of compassion, but if you're treating schizophrenia, you're labeled a lunatic and everyone avoids you. That's why it's best not to tell anyone what's really going on. Just your closest friends. Maybe not even family.
I'm looking for work, but I don't know if I'm capable of enduring eight hours of labor every single day. What kind of divine punishment is this? We'll all go to paradise like saints. Or perhaps in the next reincarnation, we'll all be Buddhas. haha

Do these heavy-duty meds just completely drain you? Because they definitely do. You really have to load up on vitamins—like, tons of them. Fruit too, though I can't say I’m much of a fruit eater myself. Personally, I’m constantly slamming supplements—omega-3s, magnesium, curcumin, you name it. I feel like I have way less energy than I did before I started this whole medication thing. And then there's the sleep situation... sometimes you're just out cold for hours, and other times, you can't catch a wink of sleep to save your life. They definitely have their downsides. But, look, they have good sides too. In my own experience, there were actually some genuine benefits to taking them.

I don't really touch fruit that much, and vitamins aren't exactly my thing—not that I take them, anyway. I try to squeeze in more veggies, but usually, they're just cooked into whatever meal I'm having, and maybe an occasional banana if I'm feeling ambitious. Bananas might be the one thing keeping me upright. I drink plenty of milk, though I keep hearing people say it’s not the healthiest habit to have; still, I end up having it with cereal or cookies for dinner most nights. And look, this isn't because of the meds—it’s always been like this. I can't tell if I'm dealing with chronic fatigue or something else entirely, or if I’m just built like Hegel—just wired that way. I’ll sleep for like 8 to 12 hours a day, usually hitting that 10-12 hour sweet spot, and then I’ll spend the entire night buzzing around until the sun comes up. It's exhausting, honestly. The current meds don't seem to bother me, but that Risperidone? Yeah, that was a nightmare. I almost lost it and did something stupid because of it—I tried to speak up, but I guess there was no Metoten available, probably because everyone was too busy dealing with those massive corporate bidding wars at places like Boeing.

Psychiatrists act like they have all the answers, but honestly? If any of them had actually lived through a psychotic break or dealt with the reality of being on these meds, they’d probably think differently. It’s easy to talk theory from a clinical desk, but it's a different story when you're the one actually dealing with it. And let's be real—with these kinds of diagnoses, just functioning on a daily basis is a massive struggle, let alone trying to hold down a job. You'd think the government would step up with some kind of support or disability benefits, right? But instead, you're just left hanging. I don't even dare to apply for disability myself—I mean, what would happen if they actually declared me unfit for work? What am I supposed to do then? Just sit there? It's a catch-22.

They honestly don't have a clue what I'm going through. Every single appointment—it’s always the same—they cut the conversation down to less than a minute. And get this—my psychiatrist actually had the nerve to start complaining to me about his own heart issues and whatnot. Look, I’m not saying he doesn't have problems, but damn, I’ve got my own laundry list of health issues to deal with too. I ended up stuck in the hospital once and was supposed to undergo some extreme testing, but I just hit a wall. I spiraled so hard that I went from being in internal medicine straight to the psych ward. It happened a second time, too, though not in a hospital setting. Honestly? They couldn't care less about us. If they don't care about healthy people, why would they care about people like me? It feels like they're just waiting for us—the old, the sick, the broken—to finally kick the bucket so they can be rid of us. They’re practically counting down the days.

Look, I’ve never been one to get worked up over things—never have. We usually say we just take life as it comes, you know? But honestly, I’ve been out of the workforce for fifteen years straight since I finished school. Never had a real job. And let's be real: what are the odds someone is going to hire a 32-year-old with my track record? I'm dealing with health issues, a messy medical diagnosis, and not enough schooling—I don't even have the specific degree they're looking for. Why would anyone pick me over some young kid who's healthy and actually holds the right credentials? It’s not like it's happening. Even the social safety nets here... they aren't exactly handing out checks to people like me. 25 miles At least if I save up, I might actually have enough to pay for some gear for my projects or maybe some retraining—you know, to chase a decent job or whatever. Not even counting disability benefits. But honestly? It feels like we’re being pushed toward another war sooner rather than later. Things are heating up over in Canada again, and it’s all starting to feel cyclical. Either everyone just vanishes from Canada entirely, leaving nothing behind but the elderly, the sick, and those Oligarchs who call themselves "protectors of the people." Look, I don't *want* a war. But... maybe there's a tiny part of me that actually wants it. Just so I could go out, die, and finally be done with this whole mess. Maybe it isn't even a desire, really—more like I’d just accept it gladly. To finally get rid of this life where everything is just constant struggle. And then there's the social security stuff. By law, I'm entitled to it, but they won't give it to me. They won't even give me what's legally mine. I sat down and did the math for fifteen years, and it comes out to about... 6.2 miles I guess. Legally, I should be covered since nobody in my family actually has an official job—we just have one tiny social security check coming in as our only "official" income.

Over in England, they actually get social assistance if you're over 330 lbs or dealing with chronic illnesses—the state actually steps up. But here in the States? You have to hide the fact that you’ve ever been sick. You show up for a job interview and mention you’ve dealt with psychosis or schizophrenia... your chances of getting hired are basically zero. It’s best to stick to those government agencies. Luckily, a friend of mine works at a university, so no one can breathe down his neck about his health or fire him for it. But if you work for a private company and end up in the psych ward three times a year? You'd be gone in a heartbeat.

Well, they aren't like people in England or anywhere else—not like these local Oligarchs. They know exactly what they're doing by keeping everyone else broke while they hoard everything. It’s a recipe for a systemic collapse, one way or another. And I can't even admit I'm ill because the CDC code is right there in my records—they noted the agency ID in my file, so if anyone looks at my paperwork, they see that CDC mark immediately. They won't hire healthy, young people, let alone us. Working for private employers here is practically serfdom. People are pulling 10 or 12-hour shifts for peanuts, and half the time they don't even pay you—they just keep you stuck in "probation" forever. It's a total scam, so it's no wonder everyone is trying to get out.

Like we actually chose this. Who in their right mind would choose mental illness? If you're fighting cancer, everyone's full of sympathy, but if you're treating schizophrenia, you're just a "lunatic" that everyone avoids. That's why it's better not to tell anyone what's actually going on. Maybe just your closest friends. Honestly, maybe not even family.
I'm looking for work, but I honestly don't know if I'm capable of grinding through 8 hours every single day. What kind of divine punishment is this? I guess we'll all go to paradise like saints. Or maybe in the next reincarnation, we'll all just be cattle. haha

Look, I didn't choose this, though I definitely didn't pass up any opportunities back in the day—if I had, I wouldn't be in this mess. Back in 2008, I might have been able to leverage some of that chaos and pitch ideas to the powers that be to get something out of them, but I didn't want to cause trouble, especially since so much of that stuff is used as weapons. But I was never really "good" at it. After that lead poisoning incident when I was a kid, they kept me in the hospital for half a month under observation, dealing with convulsions, and my folks eventually had to pull some strings to get me out. Who knows how long I've been sick—maybe it started right then. It's the truth; crazy people aren't accepted, and our opinions don't carry weight. They don't listen. And yeah, I'd work, but I couldn't handle 8, 10, or 12-hour days. Maybe 4 hours, maybe 6 max, but no one wants to hire that—they just want to exploit you. It's a curse. I've felt cursed for a long time, but I've just accepted it—this whole life. What's the point in fighting it.

Richard White8 said:Interesting. If that's the case, they should start incorporating it into psychiatric diagnosis. Right now, how do they diagnose? Through conversation, observation, intuition.
Then they send you for psychological testing. But once those results come back, the psychiatrist doesn't even bother reviewing them. They just skim them and continue doing exactly what they were going to do anyway.

My own psychiatrist told me repeatedly that she is limited in everything, especially when it comes to prescribing medication. She claimed she has no actual instruments to measure anything and that she’s basically picking drugs blindly, like a blind hen pecking for grain.

Why don't they use brain scans like that for someone sentenced to 25 years for murder committed under the influence of auditory hallucinations? The forensic experts couldn't agree on a diagnosis, so he went straight to prison. He might have actually been ill, or he might have been faking it.

A few years back, I sat down with a clinical psychologist to go through one of those endless psychological evaluations. It was just a mountain of yes-or-no questions. One question asked whether I would lose control of my bladder in front of an authority figure. Naturally, I checked "No." Another question asked if a man should be the primary decision-maker in an emergency situation. Of course, I checked "Yes." After reviewing my answers, the psychologist concluded that my profile contained far too much pathological material, suggesting that I belonged with a psychiatrist rather than her.

I would honestly bet my life that she reached that conclusion simply because of how I answered that second question.

I mean, really...

Rebecca Rivera3 said:Maybe I'm wrong, but I've noticed one thing: highly spiritual and intelligent people seem to lean toward these kinds of illnesses more often...
And it’s honestly sad. That's why I find myself clinging to the idea of getting my PhD if I can manage it. It feels like it might offer some solace. Between my concentration issues, compulsions, social phobia—not to mention everything else that's even worse—getting through college is a struggle. Just functioning in life is hard. I see you all wondering if you could even handle an eight-hour workday; I ask myself the same thing. When I finally get to campus, I wonder if I'll have the stamina to stay through a lecture, show up, and actually look okay doing it.
It's embarrassing to deal with mental health struggles. Richard White8 described it perfectly; you don't want even your closest family to know. You feel ashamed, like it makes you weak or lesser than everyone else... though it shouldn't be that way.
Vitamins help, but they make me nauseous. Most pills do, and my stomach is just a mess. I don't smoke or drink, though I do love coffee—even if it gives me heartburn. In the evenings, while the rest of the world is asleep, I love to just lie down and stare at the stars, imagining I'm on some distant planet far away from all these problems.

Baking soda. My old man used to just take a spoonful with some water—you can even stir it into a glass first if you want. People claim it can even help fight cancer. Or something like that.

Nicole Barrett76 said:A few years back, I sat down with a clinical psychologist to go through one of those endless psychological evaluations. It was just a mountain of yes-or-no questions. One question asked whether I would lose control of my bladder in front of an authority figure. Naturally, I checked "No." Another question asked if a man should be the primary decision-maker in an emergency situation. Of course, I checked "Yes." After reviewing my answers, the psychologist concluded that my profile contained far too much pathological material, suggesting that I belonged with a psychiatrist rather than her.

I would honestly bet my life that she reached that conclusion simply because of how I answered that second question.

I mean, really...

It wasn't because of that one. I know that specific test; it's 200 questions long. Who knows what else you checked? I marked down that I hear voices and see things that aren't there, and they didn't label me a psychotic—just someone with ego dysfunction.

Carol Barrett2 said:

Do these heavy-duty meds just completely drain you? Because they definitely do. You really have to load up on vitamins—like, tons of them. Fruit too, though I can't say I’m much of a fruit eater myself. Personally, I’m constantly slamming supplements—omega-3s, magnesium, curcumin, you name it. I feel like I have way less energy than I did before I started this whole medication thing. And then there's the sleep situation... sometimes you're just out cold for hours, and other times, you can't catch a wink of sleep to save your life. They definitely have their downsides. But, look, they have good sides too. In my own experience, there were actually some genuine benefits to taking them.

I don't really touch fruit that much, and vitamins aren't exactly my thing—not that I take them, anyway. I try to squeeze in more veggies, but usually, they're just cooked into whatever meal I'm having, and maybe an occasional banana if I'm feeling ambitious. Bananas might be the one thing keeping me upright. I drink plenty of milk, though I keep hearing people say it’s not the healthiest habit to have; still, I end up having it with cereal or cookies for dinner most nights. And look, this isn't because of the meds—it’s always been like this. I can't tell if I'm dealing with chronic fatigue or something else entirely, or if I’m just built like Hegel—just wired that way. I’ll sleep for like 8 to 12 hours a day, usually hitting that 10-12 hour sweet spot, and then I’ll spend the entire night buzzing around until the sun comes up. It's exhausting, honestly. The current meds don't seem to bother me, but that Risperidone? Yeah, that was a nightmare. I almost lost it and did something stupid because of it—I tried to speak up, but I guess there was no Metoten available, probably because everyone was too busy dealing with those massive corporate bidding wars at places like Boeing.

Psychiatrists act like they have all the answers, but honestly? If any of them had actually lived through a psychotic break or dealt with the reality of being on these meds, they’d probably think differently. It’s easy to talk theory from a clinical desk, but it's a different story when you're the one actually dealing with it. And let's be real—with these kinds of diagnoses, just functioning on a daily basis is a massive struggle, let alone trying to hold down a job. You'd think the government would step up with some kind of support or disability benefits, right? But instead, you're just left hanging. I don't even dare to apply for disability myself—I mean, what would happen if they actually declared me unfit for work? What am I supposed to do then? Just sit there? It's a catch-22.

They honestly don't have a clue what I'm going through. Every single appointment—it’s always the same—they cut the conversation down to less than a minute. And get this—my psychiatrist actually had the nerve to start complaining to me about his own heart issues and whatnot. Look, I’m not saying he doesn't have problems, but damn, I’ve got my own laundry list of health issues to deal with too. I ended up stuck in the hospital once and was supposed to undergo some extreme testing, but I just hit a wall. I spiraled so hard that I went from being in internal medicine straight to the psych ward. It happened a second time, too, though not in a hospital setting. Honestly? They couldn't care less about us. If they don't care about healthy people, why would they care about people like me? It feels like they're just waiting for us—the old, the sick, the broken—to finally kick the bucket so they can be rid of us. They’re practically counting down the days.

Look, I’ve never been one to get worked up over things—never have. We usually say we just take life as it comes, you know? But honestly, I’ve been out of the workforce for fifteen years straight since I finished school. Never had a real job. And let's be real: what are the odds someone is going to hire a 32-year-old with my track record? I'm dealing with health issues, a messy medical diagnosis, and not enough schooling—I don't even have the specific degree they're looking for. Why would anyone pick me over some young kid who's healthy and actually holds the right credentials? It’s not like it's happening. Even the social safety nets here... they aren't exactly handing out checks to people like me. 25 miles At least if I save up, I might actually have enough to pay for some gear for my projects or maybe some retraining—you know, to chase a decent job or whatever. Not even counting disability benefits. But honestly? It feels like we’re being pushed toward another war sooner rather than later. Things are heating up over in Canada again, and it’s all starting to feel cyclical. Either everyone just vanishes from Canada entirely, leaving nothing behind but the elderly, the sick, and those Oligarchs who call themselves "protectors of the people." Look, I don't *want* a war. But... maybe there's a tiny part of me that actually wants it. Just so I could go out, die, and finally be done with this whole mess. Maybe it isn't even a desire, really—more like I’d just accept it gladly. To finally get rid of this life where everything is just constant struggle. And then there's the social security stuff. By law, I'm entitled to it, but they won't give it to me. They won't even give me what's legally mine. I sat down and did the math for fifteen years, and it comes out to about... 6.2 miles I guess. Legally, I should be covered since nobody in my family actually has an official job—we just have one tiny social security check coming in as our only "official" income.

Over in England, they actually get social assistance if you're over 330 lbs or dealing with chronic illnesses—the state actually steps up. But here in the States? You have to hide the fact that you’ve ever been sick. You show up for a job interview and mention you’ve dealt with psychosis or schizophrenia... your chances of getting hired are basically zero. It’s best to stick to those government agencies. Luckily, a friend of mine works at a university, so no one can breathe down his neck about his health or fire him for it. But if you work for a private company and end up in the psych ward three times a year? You'd be gone in a heartbeat.

Well, they aren't like people in England or anywhere else—not like these local Oligarchs. They know exactly what they're doing by keeping everyone else broke while they hoard everything. It’s a recipe for a systemic collapse, one way or another. And I can't even admit I'm ill because the CDC code is right there in my records—they noted the agency ID in my file, so if anyone looks at my paperwork, they see that CDC mark immediately. They won't hire healthy, young people, let alone us. Working for private employers here is practically serfdom. People are pulling 10 or 12-hour shifts for peanuts, and half the time they don't even pay you—they just keep you stuck in "probation" forever. It's a total scam, so it's no wonder everyone is trying to get out.

Like we actually chose this. Who in their right mind would choose mental illness? If you're fighting cancer, everyone's full of sympathy, but if you're treating schizophrenia, you're just a "lunatic" that everyone avoids. That's why it's better not to tell anyone what's actually going on. Maybe just your closest friends. Honestly, maybe not even family.
I'm looking for work, but I honestly don't know if I'm capable of grinding through 8 hours every single day. What kind of divine punishment is this? I guess we'll all go to paradise like saints. Or maybe in the next reincarnation, we'll all just be cattle. haha

Look, I didn't choose this, though I definitely didn't pass up any opportunities back in the day—if I had, I wouldn't be in this mess. Back in 2008, I might have been able to leverage some of that chaos and pitch ideas to the powers that be to get something out of them, but I didn't want to cause trouble, especially since so much of that stuff is used as weapons. But I was never really "good" at it. After that lead poisoning incident when I was a kid, they kept me in the hospital for half a month under observation, dealing with convulsions, and my folks eventually had to pull some strings to get me out. Who knows how long I've been sick—maybe it started right then. It's the truth; crazy people aren't accepted, and our opinions don't carry weight. They don't listen. And yeah, I'd work, but I couldn't handle 8, 10, or 12-hour days. Maybe 4 hours, maybe 6 max, but no one wants to hire that—they just want to exploit you. It's a curse. I've felt cursed for a long time, but I've just accepted it—this whole life. What's the point in fighting it.

What can I honestly tell you? You’re unfortunately right about almost everything. But being right isn't the solution itself. War doesn't lead to answers, and neither does revolution. Every single revolution just births a new system or a new war—never actual stability. We need evolution. You know? Not revolution, because that just leads to more chaos. Look at Scandinavia; they have six-hour workdays. And remember, the whole eight-hour workday concept was actually pioneered by Henry Ford with his first major plants back in the day, and we've been stuck with it ever since. Now, everyone seems to be saying, "Look what Henry Ford did to us." But if I recall correctly, research from NASA suggests that a person—man or woman—simply cannot maintain full concentration for eight hours straight. Focus drops off a cliff after four or five hours of continuous labor. It's physically impossible to work the way we do now. It kills productivity and steals time from ourselves, our kids, and our families. Sadly, this foundational knowledge has been buried by the media, drowning out the wisdom we used to hold onto. That connection to nature, that fundamental relationship with the earth... I truly believe things will change. Maybe not in my lifetime, but the status quo has to break. It simply has to. Even now, people are pushing back against bankers and the entire industrial complex. I think I saw a clip where Trump was visiting somewhere in Europe, and there were massive protests by young people specifically targeting bankers and those types of institutions. Someone might argue, "Hey, banks are fine; they help you afford things you can't pay for upfront." But the real question is: why can't you afford it in the first place? We need a government led by the most capable people. Besides, let's call them what they are: legalized loan sharks. The state basically legalized the practice of someone lending you money just so they can profit off you. It's legal usury. It's rule by the strongest. As far as I know, back in the early 1920s, we didn't even have modern banking or property mortgages like we do today. It wasn't until insurance companies arrived in the US that home mortgages became a thing, simply because they saw a massive way to make money. People ask how anyone built houses, cottages, or churches before all this. Back then, the whole neighborhood would build it. You needed a house for your family? You get married? No problem, we'll all chip in and build it with you, and then later on, you help someone else when they need it. That's how it worked. Now, people wonder how it's possible without a banker. Everything is possible if there is collective will. And just to add a quick thought regarding sleep. According to traditional Chinese medicine, you should really be asleep by 11 PM. That's when your body flushes out toxins during deep sleep. While you rest, you regenerate, which you probably already know. But that's also when the detoxification happens. If you find yourself waking up to pee around 4 or 5 AM, it's often a sign that your body is trying to process a heavy load of toxins quickly during the night. It's not a crisis, but it's a signal. You just need to stop consuming toxins—like coffee or too much liquid—before 8 PM, for example. I know this because I went through it myself. Real diabetes concerns arise when you're waking up so often that you can't get any actual rest. When the constant trips to the bathroom prevent you from sleeping normally, that's when you really need to worry.

Richard White8 said:It wasn't because of that one. I know that specific test; it's 200 questions long. Who knows what else you checked? I marked down that I hear voices and see things that aren't there, and they didn't label me a psychotic—just someone with ego dysfunction.

Well, she didn't tell me anything at all. Even so, she sent me right back to the psychiatrists and wrote GAP on my chart as the diagnosis. It was the exact same one two different psychiatrists had already given me. And frankly, both of them are far too obsessed with their own power; one of them even went as far as publicly meddling with "veterans' PTSD pensions."

It truly is such a shame that the clinical psychologist referred me back to the psychiatry department, because she is quite literally the only competent professional among all the psychologists and psychiatrists at this local county hospital I'm stuck with.

-------------------

I believe I read somewhere that patients with catatonic schizophrenia supposedly suffer from command hallucinations.

Carol Barrett2 said:

Do these heavy-duty meds just completely drain you? Because they definitely do. You really have to load up on vitamins—like, tons of them. Fruit too, though I can't say I’m much of a fruit eater myself. Personally, I’m constantly slamming supplements—omega-3s, magnesium, curcumin, you name it. I feel like I have way less energy than I did before I started this whole medication thing. And then there's the sleep situation... sometimes you're just out cold for hours, and other times, you can't catch a wink of sleep to save your life. They definitely have their downsides. But, look, they have good sides too. In my own experience, there were actually some genuine benefits to taking them.

I don't really touch fruit that much, and vitamins aren't exactly my thing—not that I take them, anyway. I try to squeeze in more veggies, but usually, they're just cooked into whatever meal I'm having, and maybe an occasional banana if I'm feeling ambitious. Bananas might be the one thing keeping me upright. I drink plenty of milk, though I keep hearing people say it’s not the healthiest habit to have; still, I end up having it with cereal or cookies for dinner most nights. And look, this isn't because of the meds—it’s always been like this. I can't tell if I'm dealing with chronic fatigue or something else entirely, or if I’m just built like Hegel—just wired that way. I’ll sleep for like 8 to 12 hours a day, usually hitting that 10-12 hour sweet spot, and then I’ll spend the entire night buzzing around until the sun comes up. It's exhausting, honestly. The current meds don't seem to bother me, but that Risperidone? Yeah, that was a nightmare. I almost lost it and did something stupid because of it—I tried to speak up, but I guess there was no Metoten available, probably because everyone was too busy dealing with those massive corporate bidding wars at places like Boeing.

Psychiatrists act like they have all the answers, but honestly? If any of them had actually lived through a psychotic break or dealt with the reality of being on these meds, they’d probably think differently. It’s easy to talk theory from a clinical desk, but it's a different story when you're the one actually dealing with it. And let's be real—with these kinds of diagnoses, just functioning on a daily basis is a massive struggle, let alone trying to hold down a job. You'd think the government would step up with some kind of support or disability benefits, right? But instead, you're just left hanging. I don't even dare to apply for disability myself—I mean, what would happen if they actually declared me unfit for work? What am I supposed to do then? Just sit there? It's a catch-22.

They honestly don't have a clue what I'm going through. Every single appointment—it’s always the same—they cut the conversation down to less than a minute. And get this—my psychiatrist actually had the nerve to start complaining to me about his own heart issues and whatnot. Look, I’m not saying he doesn't have problems, but damn, I’ve got my own laundry list of health issues to deal with too. I ended up stuck in the hospital once and was supposed to undergo some extreme testing, but I just hit a wall. I spiraled so hard that I went from being in internal medicine straight to the psych ward. It happened a second time, too, though not in a hospital setting. Honestly? They couldn't care less about us. If they don't care about healthy people, why would they care about people like me? It feels like they're just waiting for us—the old, the sick, the broken—to finally kick the bucket so they can be rid of us. They’re practically counting down the days.

Look, I’ve never been one to get worked up over things—never have. We usually say we just take life as it comes, you know? But honestly, I’ve been out of the workforce for fifteen years straight since I finished school. Never had a real job. And let's be real: what are the odds someone is going to hire a 32-year-old with my track record? I'm dealing with health issues, a messy medical diagnosis, and not enough schooling—I don't even have the specific degree they're looking for. Why would anyone pick me over some young kid who's healthy and actually holds the right credentials? It’s not like it's happening. Even the social safety nets here... they aren't exactly handing out checks to people like me. 25 miles At least if I save up, I might actually have enough to pay for some gear for my projects or maybe some retraining—you know, to chase a decent job or whatever. Not even counting disability benefits. But honestly? It feels like we’re being pushed toward another war sooner rather than later. Things are heating up over in Canada again, and it’s all starting to feel cyclical. Either everyone just vanishes from Canada entirely, leaving nothing behind but the elderly, the sick, and those Oligarchs who call themselves "protectors of the people." Look, I don't *want* a war. But... maybe there's a tiny part of me that actually wants it. Just so I could go out, die, and finally be done with this whole mess. Maybe it isn't even a desire, really—more like I’d just accept it gladly. To finally get rid of this life where everything is just constant struggle. And then there's the social security stuff. By law, I'm entitled to it, but they won't give it to me. They won't even give me what's legally mine. I sat down and did the math for fifteen years, and it comes out to about... 6.2 miles I guess. Legally, I should be covered since nobody in my family actually has an official job—we just have one tiny social security check coming in as our only "official" income.

Over in England, they actually get social assistance if you're over 330 lbs or dealing with chronic illnesses—the state actually steps up. But here in the States? You have to hide the fact that you’ve ever been sick. You show up for a job interview and mention you’ve dealt with psychosis or schizophrenia... your chances of getting hired are basically zero. It’s best to stick to those government agencies. Luckily, a friend of mine works at a university, so no one can breathe down his neck about his health or fire him for it. But if you work for a private company and end up in the psych ward three times a year? You'd be gone in a heartbeat.

Well, they aren't like people in England or anywhere else—not like these local Oligarchs. They know exactly what they're doing by keeping everyone else broke while they hoard everything. It’s a recipe for a systemic collapse, one way or another. And I can't even admit I'm ill because the CDC code is right there in my records—they noted the agency ID in my file, so if anyone looks at my paperwork, they see that CDC mark immediately. They won't hire healthy, young people, let alone us. Working for private employers here is practically serfdom. People are pulling 10 or 12-hour shifts for peanuts, and half the time they don't even pay you—they just keep you stuck in "probation" forever. It's a total scam, so it's no wonder everyone is trying to get out.

Like we actually chose this. Who in their right mind would choose mental illness? If you're fighting cancer, everyone's full of sympathy, but if you're treating schizophrenia, you're just a "lunatic" that everyone avoids. That's why it's better not to tell anyone what's actually going on. Maybe just your closest friends. Honestly, maybe not even family.
I'm looking for work, but I honestly don't know if I'm capable of grinding through 8 hours every single day. What kind of divine punishment is this? I guess we'll all go to paradise like saints. Or maybe in the next reincarnation, we'll all just be cattle. haha

Look, I didn't choose this, though I definitely didn't pass up any opportunities back in the day—if I had, I wouldn't be in this mess. Back in 2008, I might have been able to leverage some of that chaos and pitch ideas to the powers that be to get something out of them, but I didn't want to cause trouble, especially since so much of that stuff is used as weapons. But I was never really "good" at it. After that lead poisoning incident when I was a kid, they kept me in the hospital for half a month under observation, dealing with convulsions, and my folks eventually had to pull some strings to get me out. Who knows how long I've been sick—maybe it started right then. It's the truth; crazy people aren't accepted, and our opinions don't carry weight. They don't listen. And yeah, I'd work, but I couldn't handle 8, 10, or 12-hour days. Maybe 4 hours, maybe 6 max, but no one wants to hire that—they just want to exploit you. It's a curse. I've felt cursed for a long time, but I've just accepted it—this whole life. What's the point in fighting it.

For example, what is the CDC? I haven't heard of them here. I have no idea what they are talking about. Any kind of conflict would only make things worse. The US has been part of the EU for years now, yet we aren't seeing any actual improvement. Eventually, Canada will join the EU too. There won't be any more wars. The global superpowers won't allow it because it simply doesn't serve their interests anymore.
As for your medication, are you taking Moditen? You should consider trying something newer—Seroquel, Zyprexa, Azolar, or Zeldox. I used to take Moditen combined with Zeldox. My psychiatrist eventually stopped me from taking Moditen because it’s quite potent; long-term use can cause muscle spasms or issues with eye rolling.

Nicole Barrett76 said:Well, she didn't tell me anything at all. Even so, she sent me right back to the psychiatrists and wrote GAP on my chart as the diagnosis. It was the exact same one two different psychiatrists had already given me. And frankly, both of them are far too obsessed with their own power; one of them even went as far as publicly meddling with "veterans' PTSD pensions."

It truly is such a shame that the clinical psychologist referred me back to the psychiatry department, because she is quite literally the only competent professional among all the psychologists and psychiatrists at this local county hospital I'm stuck with.

-------------------

I believe I read somewhere that patients with catatonic schizophrenia supposedly suffer from command hallucinations.

What kind of diagnosis is GAP? Unfortunately, those psychologists can't do anything besides send you right back to the psychiatrist for your meds. Catatonic schizophrenia is when a patient stays frozen in one position, standing rigid for hours without moving.
Command hallucinations are more common in paranoid schizophrenia.

Jose Ward4 said:What can I honestly tell you? You’re unfortunately right about almost everything. But being right isn't the solution itself. War doesn't lead to answers, and neither does revolution. Every single revolution just births a new system or a new war—never actual stability. We need evolution. You know? Not revolution, because that just leads to more chaos. Look at Scandinavia; they have six-hour workdays. And remember, the whole eight-hour workday concept was actually pioneered by Henry Ford with his first major plants back in the day, and we've been stuck with it ever since. Now, everyone seems to be saying, "Look what Henry Ford did to us." But if I recall correctly, research from NASA suggests that a person—man or woman—simply cannot maintain full concentration for eight hours straight. Focus drops off a cliff after four or five hours of continuous labor. It's physically impossible to work the way we do now. It kills productivity and steals time from ourselves, our kids, and our families. Sadly, this foundational knowledge has been buried by the media, drowning out the wisdom we used to hold onto. That connection to nature, that fundamental relationship with the earth... I truly believe things will change. Maybe not in my lifetime, but the status quo has to break. It simply has to. Even now, people are pushing back against bankers and the entire industrial complex. I think I saw a clip where Trump was visiting somewhere in Europe, and there were massive protests by young people specifically targeting bankers and those types of institutions. Someone might argue, "Hey, banks are fine; they help you afford things you can't pay for upfront." But the real question is: why can't you afford it in the first place? We need a government led by the most capable people. Besides, let's call them what they are: legalized loan sharks. The state basically legalized the practice of someone lending you money just so they can profit off you. It's legal usury. It's rule by the strongest. As far as I know, back in the early 1920s, we didn't even have modern banking or property mortgages like we do today. It wasn't until insurance companies arrived in the US that home mortgages became a thing, simply because they saw a massive way to make money. People ask how anyone built houses, cottages, or churches before all this. Back then, the whole neighborhood would build it. You needed a house for your family? You get married? No problem, we'll all chip in and build it with you, and then later on, you help someone else when they need it. That's how it worked. Now, people wonder how it's possible without a banker. Everything is possible if there is collective will. And just to add a quick thought regarding sleep. According to traditional Chinese medicine, you should really be asleep by 11 PM. That's when your body flushes out toxins during deep sleep. While you rest, you regenerate, which you probably already know. But that's also when the detoxification happens. If you find yourself waking up to pee around 4 or 5 AM, it's often a sign that your body is trying to process a heavy load of toxins quickly during the night. It's not a crisis, but it's a signal. You just need to stop consuming toxins—like coffee or too much liquid—before 8 PM, for example. I know this because I went through it myself. Real diabetes concerns arise when you're waking up so often that you can't get any actual rest. When the constant trips to the bathroom prevent you from sleeping normally, that's when you really need to worry.

It's not like I'm out here looking for a fight or anything. What I meant was... if I had to go, I'd rather go down fighting than just slowly wasting away like this. That was my point. As for the rest of what I wrote—or what you wrote—I don't really know. Like, how would we even implement a six-hour workday? It's not like there's a manual for that. I used to work a system where I'd pull twelve-hour shifts but have way more days off—you know, work twelve, rest twelve, or something like that. I think I have it written down somewhere. But a six-hour shift? Who knows if that's even doable. And regarding that stuff you mentioned about how society and communities used to support one another... I mean, sure, you still see glimpses of that here and there, but most people have drifted apart—even families. It just is what it is. For everything else, I honestly don't know, and I'm certainly not claiming to be an expert.

Richard White8 said:For example, what is the CDC? I haven't heard of them here. I have no idea what they are talking about. Any kind of conflict would only make things worse. The US has been part of the EU for years now, yet we aren't seeing any actual improvement. Eventually, Canada will join the EU too. There won't be any more wars. The global superpowers won't allow it because it simply doesn't serve their interests anymore.
As for your medication, are you taking Moditen? You should consider trying something newer—Seroquel, Zyprexa, Azolar, or Zeldox. I used to take Moditen combined with Zeldox. My psychiatrist eventually stopped me from taking Moditen because it’s quite potent; long-term use can cause muscle spasms or issues with eye rolling.

Look, there might not even be a choice in the matter. The system is basically on the brink of collapse, and the only thing left for the Oligarchs to do is push us into a war so we "little people" can just tear each other apart. The CDC is basically a mental health center. It's like a family medicine clinic specifically for people with mental health struggles. Maybe the global powers don't care, or who knows what they're actually planning. You see the tension everywhere, all these proxy wars they use to pull the strings.

Moditen isn't even that strong for me—I don't really feel it. That Risperidone they tried giving me as a substitute was a total disaster; I almost lost it because of that stuff. As for the others, I wouldn't know. Moditen is one of the few things you can still get for next to nothing. Like Apaurin and Moditen [Metoten]. You know, the stuff on those subsidized prescriptions... I can't even remember the names for the life of me.

Edit: Actually, I'm not sure, maybe there are a few other cheap meds left.

Carol Barrett2 said:Look, there might not even be a choice in the matter. The system is basically on the brink of collapse, and the only thing left for the Oligarchs to do is push us into a war so we "little people" can just tear each other apart. The CDC is basically a mental health center. It's like a family medicine clinic specifically for people with mental health struggles. Maybe the global powers don't care, or who knows what they're actually planning. You see the tension everywhere, all these proxy wars they use to pull the strings.

Moditen isn't even that strong for me—I don't really feel it. That Risperidone they tried giving me as a substitute was a total disaster; I almost lost it because of that stuff. As for the others, I wouldn't know. Moditen is one of the few things you can still get for next to nothing. Like Apaurin and Moditen [Metoten]. You know, the stuff on those subsidized prescriptions... I can't even remember the names for the life of me.

Edit: Actually, I'm not sure, maybe there are a few other cheap meds left.

Fine, go ahead and stick with Elon Musk. I was told it's an old-school medication that doctors are moving away from now. If it works for you, great. For me, even 1 mg of Elon Musk caused my leg to seize up once. And yeah, Risperidone was a nightmare for me too.

Richard White8 said:Fine, go ahead and stick with Elon Musk. I was told it's an old-school medication that doctors are moving away from now. If it works for you, great. For me, even 1 mg of Elon Musk caused my leg to seize up once. And yeah, Risperidone was a nightmare for me too.

I mean, I honestly don't know if there are even any decent alternatives out there. This stuff is basically the cheapest thing on the market—it's what you get when you're using insurance to cover the bare minimum. I think a single box goes for maybe $9 at the pharmacy. Who knows, maybe it might actually do something for me, too. But ever since I started taking it, I've been seeing these floaters in my vision and everything is just getting worse. I've seen blood cells before, sure, but nothing like this whole floater situation. I'm well aware of the side effects. It just sucks.

Carol Barrett2 said:I mean, I honestly don't know if there are even any decent alternatives out there. This stuff is basically the cheapest thing on the market—it's what you get when you're using insurance to cover the bare minimum. I think a single box goes for maybe $9 at the pharmacy. Who knows, maybe it might actually do something for me, too. But ever since I started taking it, I've been seeing these floaters in my vision and everything is just getting worse. I've seen blood cells before, sure, but nothing like this whole floater situation. I'm well aware of the side effects. It just sucks.

Floatters—what even are they? Even the other options are subsidized—at least here in the US, and they should be in Canada too. I don't know; just take Elon Musk if it works for you. It wiped me out completely. They switched me to Zeldox instead. That helped somewhat, though it made things a little worse too.