Support resources for families dealing with cancer and other serious illnesses

I’m absolutely terrified
My mom starts her chemotherapy this Monday... I mean, okay, I know we're heading into a complete mess, but I suppose... I guess if we just brace ourselves, we can handle it? Or so I tell myself while I sit here trying to stay composed.

I was watching this documentary on TV yesterday, and there was this woman who had cervical cancer... she’d gone through surgery, and eventually, they sent her for radiation therapy...
And she kept saying how much of a massive mistake it was to agree to the radiation in the first place😢 because the radiation completely destroyed her intestines...

So now I’m spiraling into this total panic because I honestly don't know what the smartest move is. Mom has finally started recovering, she’s getting her strength back, and now all that grueling effort and slow, snail-like progress might just be wiped out by these treatments. I just don't know...

Yesterday, I grabbed lunch with a friend I hadn't really seen or spoken to in ages. His dad passed away this past Christmas Eve; he had cancer at the junction of his esophagus and stomach. My friend was telling me how his father suffered for months and ended up dying in such terrible agony🙂 which, frankly, was the last thing I needed to hear right now.😢

If it were me—God forbid—facing an illness, I think I know exactly what I’d do: I wouldn't go through with the therapies. But taking responsibility for someone else's life? I just don't think I can do that.

Megan Fowler78 said:Last year, my husband was diagnosed with lung cancer, and we went through the whole gauntlet—chemotherapy, radiation on the lungs, even some preventative radiation on the head... and now, after nine months, the cancer has resurfaced in his lungs, liver, and adrenal glands... Following the oncologist's advice, we jumped straight back into chemo, though they were quite blunt with us about how slim the chances are of actually stopping it.

🙂

Kimberly Wright said:I am absolutely terrified
My mom starts chemotherapy this Monday... look, I get it, I know we're heading straight into hell, but still... I'm just trying to stay composed while my heart sinks somewhere in my stomach.

Yesterday I was watching this news segment on TV about a woman who had cervical cancer... she went through surgery, and eventually, they sent her for radiation...
And she was saying how much of a mistake it was to agree to the radiation treatment because😢 the radiation completely wrecked her intestines...

Now I'm spiraling into a total panic because I have no idea what the smartest move is. My mom has finally started recovering; she’s getting her strength back, and now all that grueling effort and snail-paced progress might just be wiped out by these therapies. I just don't know...

Then yesterday, I grabbed lunch with a friend I hadn't seen or heard from in ages. His dad passed away this past Christmas Eve. He had cancer at the junction of his esophagus and stomach. This guy tells me his dad suffered for months and died in absolute agony🙂 honestly, that was the last thing I needed to hear right now.😢

If it were me—God forbid—I know exactly what I'd do: I wouldn't go through with the treatments. But I can't take responsibility for someone else's life.

Honey, cancer is a brutal disease, and as far as things go, radiation and chemotherapy offer the best results available right now. Of course, they come with a heavy toll and can cause serious damage.
The reality is there isn't really another option; if you don't do it, the disease will run wild and it's game over.
Personally, I would always choose life and the fight, regardless of whatever consequences the illness and the treatment throw at me. I'm at peace with that because I've accepted that life itself is built on struggle and suffering. Once those two stop, then you can say for sure that you're dead.

Kimberly Wright said:I am absolutely terrified
My mom starts her chemotherapy this Monday... okay, look, I know things are about to get messy, but—well—we just have to deal with it, right? I’m trying to stay positive, but honestly, I'm just white-knuckling it through this one alone.

Yesterday, I was watching this news report, and there was this woman who had cervical cancer... she’d had surgery, and eventually, they sent her for radiation therapy...
And she kept saying how much of a huge mistake it was to agree to the radiation😢 because the radiation ended up destroying her intestines...

So now I'm spiraling into a total panic because I have no idea what the smartest move is. Mom has finally started recovering—she's getting her strength back—and now I'm worried all that hard work and slow, steady progress might be wiped out by these treatments. I just don't know...

Then yesterday, I grabbed lunch with a friend I hadn't really seen or spoken to in ages. His dad passed away this past Christmas Eve. He had cancer at the junction of his esophagus and stomach. My friend was telling me how his dad suffered for months and died in such terrible agony🙂—honestly, I really didn't need to hear a story like that right now.😢

If it were me—God forbid—I know exactly what I’d do: I wouldn't go through with the treatments. But taking responsibility for someone else's life? I just can't do that.

Kimberly Wright, I know exactly what you're going through. We went through that same fear regarding the chemo and the side effects, but my mother-in-law just finished her fourth cycle and has two more before her break. After the chemo started, she actually began eating like a horse! Her hair hasn't even fallen out yet—and I'm crossing my fingers it won't—but she's stronger than ever, more determined to win, and has such a better attitude since the pain isn't as bad as it used to be. Now, she has metastases in her liver and bladder, so I don't quite know what to say regarding the metastases your mom is facing. But please, stay brave—for yourself and for her. It's truly the only thing you can do!!!

Hi everyone... it seems like just when you least expect it, illness hits. I have an uncle in his 40s living in Italy who was diagnosed with skin cancer (I don't know all the technical terms, but I think you get what I mean)... at first, he just had this little sore on his back that wouldn't heal, and when he went to have it cleaned, they found malignant cells in the tissue...
...so far, he’s already gone through surgery three times to remove the affected areas. Right now, he’s covered in about 50 stitches, with scars running from his back down to his knee, and every time we wait for the results, they come back positive. It feels like we're just going in circles 😢😢😢
..has anyone else dealt with this nightmare? He's far away, so we can't really be there for him, and since he has two little babies, it's just really hard on us. We aren't sure how to help 😢...any advice would be appreciated...

Nancy Campbell5 said:Hey everyone... cancer always seems to strike when you least expect it. I have an uncle in his 40s living over in Italy who was just diagnosed with skin cancer (I don't know all the medical jargon, but I'm sure you get what I mean). It started as this little scratch on his back that just wouldn't heal, and when he went to get it cleaned up, they found malignant cells in the tissue...
...he's already gone under the knife three times to have them cut out the areas they flagged. Right now, he’s covered in about 50 staples from his back down to his knee, and every single time we wait for the biopsy results, they come back positive. It's just a never-ending cycle. 😢😢😢
..has anyone dealt with this nightmare before? He's far away, we can't get to him easily, and he has two little babies at home—it's just heartbreaking and we feel so helpless. 😢...any advice would be appreciated...

First off, there is a massive difference between general skin cancer and a malignant melanoma; that distinction completely changes the prognosis for recovery.
A malignant melanoma is a brutal diagnosis.

He’s just so frantic right now that we can't seem to get a straight diagnosis out of him 😢 once I finally find out, I'll post here so maybe you all can offer some insight...

Nancy Campbell5 said:Hello everyone... disease always seems to strike when you least expect it. I have an uncle in his 40s living in Italy who was diagnosed with skin cancer (I don't know the technical terms, but I think you get the idea). It started as a small wound on his back that just wouldn't heal, and when he went to have it cleaned, they found malignant cells in the tissue...
...he has already undergone surgery three times to remove the affected areas. He currently has about 50 staples across his body, with incisions running from his back down to his knee. Every time, we wait for the results, and every time they come back positive. It’s just a vicious cycle.😢😢😢
...does anyone have experience with this nightmare? He is far away, and we can't reach him easily. He has two babies, and it is truly difficult for us; we don't know how we can help him.😢...any advice would be appreciated...

Unfortunately, I have had my own experience with this horror. My father lost his battle with malignant squamous cell carcinoma after five grueling years. It all began with a tiny scratch that refused to heal—something as minor as a mosquito bite—and ended with eight surgeries, radiation, and several skin grafts. 😢
As Angela Wright mentioned, there is a massive difference depending on the specific type of skin condition involved. I sincerely hope your uncle's diagnosis is less severe than melanoma...
Try to remain optimistic. No matter how dark things may seem, it is easier to face the day with a positive mindset. I am keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Question for anyone who has dealt with this or knows more about it.

A friend of mine was diagnosed with an ovarian cyst (which later turned out via CT scan to be cancer, likely involving the intestines too)
Her abdomen is full of fluid; they performed a puncture once and drained 4 liters, but doctors said there’s another 4 liters left that won't be touched until surgery.
I overheard from the doctors that they aren't even certain if it has spread to the liver yet.

She goes into surgery in two days, despite everything happening in just seven days. There were zero symptoms until a week ago when her stomach started bloating from the fluid, followed by back and lower abdominal pain, constipation, and decreased urination.

I want to know what experiences people here have had regarding this. Did I post this in the right place? Everything I've read online suggests the prognosis isn't great, though nothing is 100% certain until they actually open her up and see the extent of it.

What is the recovery process like after surgery? They mentioned chemotherapy as well.

Please help me make sense of this and let me know how I can best support her.

Thanks in advance to everyone.

Jamie Patel4, I'm so sorry... all we know right now is that it's some kind of melanoma. We'll try to dig up more details soon.😢 I just can't imagine him being gone.😢

Matthew Davis75 said:I have a question for anyone who has dealt with this or knows more about it.

A friend of mine was recently diagnosed with an ovarian cyst, which turned out to be cancer via CT and CD scans—it looks like it may have spread to her intestines as well.
She’s dealing with significant ascites; they already performed a paracentesis and drained 4 liters, but they expect there to be at least that much more, which they won't touch until the surgery.
From what I overheard from the doctors, they aren't even certain yet if it has reached the liver.

Her surgery is scheduled in two days, yet this entire situation unfolded in just seven days. She had zero symptoms until last week, when her abdomen began swelling with fluid, followed by back pain, lower abdominal pain, constipation, and decreased urine output.

I'm looking for any shared experiences on this forum regarding this topic. I hope I've posted this in the right place, because everything I've managed to read online offers rather grim prognoses. Of course, nothing is ever 100% certain until they actually open her up and see the full extent of the damage.

What is the recovery process typically like after surgery? They mentioned chemotherapy as well...

Please help me wrap my head around all of this and let me know the best way I can support her.

Thanks in advance to everyone.

The true extent of things won't be clear until they perform the surgery. They will also run pathology to determine the exact stage and identify which organs are involved, and they'll drain the remaining fluid then. Usually, that fluid buildup is caused by the liver, so it's possible the liver is involved and we might be looking at a later stage. This type of cancer often presents with very few early warning signs.
Recovery is highly individual. My mother recovered relatively quickly, within a week or two, so I suspect your friend might recover just as fast. Typically, chemotherapy follows about a month after surgery—usually three rounds, then testing for tumor markers, followed by another three rounds. After that, there's often a "second look" surgery to remove anything else that couldn't be addressed during the initial procedure.
She should consider starting some immune support immediately, like high-quality propolis, Tylenol, or something similar. You can find plenty of information about the disease, supplement treatments, and even forums through the "Good Morning America" association link here:.
As for the prognosis, it really depends on the patient. In my mother's case, they gave her six months, but she ended up living for two years.
Feel free to ask anything else you need to know.

Matthew Davis75 said:I have a question for anyone who has dealt with this or knows more about it.

Basically, a friend of mine was diagnosed with an ovarian cyst (which later turned out via CT scans to be cancer, likely spreading to her intestines).
She’s dealing with massive ascites—fluid buildup in her abdomen. They already performed a paracentesis once to drain 4 liters, but they told her there’s probably another 4 liters sitting there that won't be touched until she goes into surgery.
From what I overheard from the doctors, they aren't even certain if it has reached her liver yet.

She’s scheduled for surgery in two days, and all of this hit her in just seven days. She had zero symptoms until a week ago when her stomach started swelling from the fluid, followed by back pain, lower abdominal pain, constipation, and much less urine output than usual.

What I want to know is what kind of experiences people here have had with this? Also, did I post this in the right place? Everything I've managed to read online gives pretty grim prognoses, though I know nothing is 100% certain until they actually open her up and see the full extent of the damage.

What does recovery look like after the surgery? They mentioned chemotherapy as well...

Please help me make sense of this so I know the best way to support her.

Thanks in advance to everyone.

Oh man, that sounds incredibly heavy. 😢
That damn ovarian cancer is sneaky as hell. It often doesn't cause a single issue until it's already gained significant momentum, which is why it's usually caught at such an advanced stage.
Look, based on what you've described, it honestly sounds like things have progressed quite far. She is almost certainly looking at chemo. She’s going to need massive support from those around her. Whatever you do, don't pity her—just try to keep the vibes positive and provide a supportive environment. She’s facing a massive, grueling fight ahead.
Click on my signature below the post and log in to the forum; there is an entire dedicated thread specifically for this disease.

Nancy Campbell5 said:I am so incredibly sorry to hear this. All we know right now is that it’s some form of melanoma. We are going to do everything we can to dig deeper and get more specific details as soon as possible.😢 I can't even wrap my head around the idea of him being gone. 😢

Oh, man, I feel for you. 😢
Unfortunately, when you're dealing with malignant melanoma, the medical reality is pretty straightforward: the goal of treatment is primarily about buying as much time as possible and making sure that time is actually worth living.
As of right now, modern medicine just doesn't have an answer that offers a real cure.

Stop dwelling on the idea of him leaving. None of us are permanent fixtures in this world; we’re all just passing through. Obsessing over the end is completely counterproductive—it’s like trying to enjoy a meal while staring at the bill. You'll only end up dragging that heavy weight around, which ruins the precious time you actually have left together. Make the most of every single good day. Surround yourselves with positivity and soak up every moment. When you finally sit down to tally up the score of a life lived, the quality of those moments matters infinitely more than the number of years on the calendar. What’s the point of living to 110 if you spent that time being unloved?

😢 I really wish we could be with him, but he’s just too far away to travel back and forth all the time... thanks for the info, though. If I happen to find out anything else, I'll probably post an update.

Amanda Miller69 said:The true extent won't be known until they perform the surgery. They will conduct an intensive analysis to determine the stage and the exact area affected, then drain any remaining fluid. Usually, this type of fluid buildup comes from the liver, which might indicate a more advanced stage. This kind of cancer often lacks early symptoms.
Recovery varies by individual. My mother recovered relatively quickly, within a week or two, so I believe your friend might recover even faster. Following about a month, chemotherapy begins—three rounds initially, followed by marker testing, then three more rounds. After that, there is a "second look" surgery to remove anything else that needs to be addressed if it wasn't possible during the first procedure.
She should start taking immune support immediately, such as native propolis, Tylenol, or something similar. You can find information on the disease and various treatments via the "Good Morning America" association link here: . They also have a forum.
Regarding the prognosis, it depends entirely on the patient. My mother was given six months, yet she lived for two years.
Ask whatever you need to know.

She is a fighter and has immense support. I failed to mention she is only 30, so I am hopeful her body can handle this.

The bad news is she has developed a fever. No doctor in the US would operate while a patient has a fever, so we are hoping it breaks soon. She has been put on antibiotics, but the temperature isn't dropping. We are praying it stabilizes before the surgery scheduled for Tuesday.

The most tragic part is how sudden this all was. I don't know what the medical standards are like here in America, but back home in Canada, gynecologists rarely, if ever, check ovarian ultrasound; everything just boils down to a Pap smear, despite everyone preaching the importance of prevention.

Thanks again for the info.

I have a question for anyone who understands this kind of medical situation. My mother and her son are coming to visit me for two weeks. My mom has been battling breast cancer for quite a while now, and unfortunately, it has metastasized throughout her spine. She’s had radiation, but they wouldn't do surgery because of the spread. She deals with constant pain, has trouble bending over, and struggles to find a comfortable sleeping position... though she still manages to stay mobile and helps out around the house. She’s on medication and has switched to an all-organic vegetarian diet.
By some twist of fate, they are traveling to see me here in the States, and I’m honestly terrified about her health since she won't have any medical coverage here.
I actually asked her daughter to pay for some travel insurance for her. I'm just so worried that if something goes wrong, I won't know what to do. Medical interventions here are insanely expensive if you aren't covered by insurance.
I wrote a letter to her daughter with a heavy heart, trying to be careful so she doesn't take it the wrong way. I simply can't afford to cover any medical costs myself; I've only been living here for a few years and haven't even gotten settled yet.
I don't know if there's a way to purchase international health coverage back home in America, or if they would even accept the payment given how long she's been ill.
They are flying in, so I wonder if there's a way to add insurance through the airline?
I really want to host them. I want her to be able to relax and enjoy herself at my place, but I'm paralyzed by the "what if" regarding her health.
I couldn't bring myself to say no when they asked to stay with me for those two weeks. So, I agreed... but a few days later, I reached out to her daughter to ask about the insurance.
The daughter organized the trip, but it wasn't originally meant to be this way—they were supposed to go to her place across the ocean. Because of some issues with flight bookings, they ended up with round-trip tickets only to the US, so they'll be staying with me.
Does anyone here know anything about how healthcare works in these situations? Any advice at all would mean the world.
Thanks in advance to everyone.

Does anyone know how to explain this in English, or maybe just plain terms if you can...
The initial diagnosis was "nevo di spitz atypico," which they classified as malignant because it had already metastasized. They did a contrast scan that showed it had spread to two lymph nodes... then the histology from the first surgery indicated it had metastasized to 35 different biopsy sites... during that whole process, there were several surgeries on the affected areas..
..we're just waiting on the final results now...
..does anyone actually understand what I'm talking about? Could someone please explain it to me like I'm five...

Nancy Campbell5 said:Can anyone tell me what this means in English, or even just explain it simply...
The initial diagnosis was an "atypical Spitz nevus." It was classified as malignant because it had metastasized. He underwent some kind of contrast imaging which showed it had spread to two lymph nodes... then the histological results following the first surgery indicated that it had metastasized further across 35 biopsy sites... during that process, several surgeries were performed on the affected areas..
..we are waiting for the final pathology report...
..does anyone understand what I am talking about? Please explain it to me like I'm a child...

Generally speaking, a Spitz nevus isn't melanoma; it's a benign lesion affecting the epidermis and dermis. It was frequently confused with melanoma, which led to the infamous labels "benign juvenile melanoma" or "Spitz melanoma."
Unfortunately, however, an atypical Spitz nevus is remarkably similar to melanoma, making them difficult to distinguish at times. It can be malignant and metastatic. Which, obviously, is a bad situation. Furthermore, its behavior is quite unpredictable.

I wish I could offer more assistance, but that is the extent of my knowledge. I am no doctor; I have simply had the misfortune of having to study skin carcinomas and other cutaneous growths. 😢

My advice would be to browse the web a bit to find the specific information you need—I assume you are looking for details regarding prognosis and recovery rates, among other things. (Searching under "Spitz nevus atypical" should yield better results in English).
Perhaps you might even take those findings to a specialist here in the States to get a second opinion...
I'm no expert...
Regardless, keep your chin up.

To my dear friends,
I moved to a major city to start college. Since my family is struggling financially right now, I’ve settled in with my aunt. She has a massive apartment, and I have my own room... so my life as a student has officially begun. But things aren't all sunshine and rainbows. My aunt has been battling cancer for five years now. 😢 Honestly, she’s more like a second mother to me. You know that feeling when someone goes in for their weekly treatments? The hair loss, the nausea, the mood swings... it’s brutal. 😢 It breaks my heart just thinking about it, especially seeing the ambulance parked outside the building every single day. Her test results are fine—for now, at least. But these treatments are absolutely exhausting.

Illness doesn't discriminate.

@wanderingmaker32/">@@wanderingmaker32
how’s your auntie’s appetite holding up lately?

so, my mom started her chemo rounds this week..
yesterday she began feeling this slight nausea and weakness, telling me she feels sort of drunk or lightheaded..
she felt a little better this morning, though. I suppose the body just needs some time to try and recover from all those toxins...

she actually gave me a good laugh today 😁
she opens the fridge and just asks what kind of garbage I bought??
'what garbage? you mean the arugula?'
'yeah.'
'but Mom, it's healthy, you need to eat your greens..'
'I am not eating that stinking piece of crap!'
and there I was 😕
trying to say, 'well, but..' and now I'm stuck trying to lecture her with everything I've learned about healthy eating..
and she just looks at me and says: 'oh please, just shut up! even hearing you talk makes me feel sick!' 🤣 🤣

poor thing, she's feeling so miserable that she's just completely fed up with everything