Posts by Sophia Allen12

Sam Smith3 said:Hey there...
Anne is asking you something—hello!!!
Give her an answer...
🙂 👍

I think I already sent a DM before😬

Sam Smith3 said:Why do you even care what people think?
Look, if I had listened to everyone else back in the day, I probably would’ve ended up totally isolated—or worse—just because I don't fit into those "standard" little boxes people love so much...
It really just makes you wonder... who actually defines "normal"? Them or me?

Honestly, you should never let someone else's opinion dictate how you see yourself...

🙂

Thanks for the input, because you are honestly spot on! If I could actually manage to take your advice more often, life would be a breeze—wishing you nothing but the best! 🙂

Sam Smith3 said:Even if you're just messing around, in this thread... I'm totally fine with it...
🙂
🙏

Not really, though—like I mentioned before, until I really "open up," people tend to perceive me a bit differently...

Sam Smith3 said:The fact that I dropped several thousand dollars on the exact same thing...😛 🙄
And then there's the part where I actually have to sit through classes....
Just imagine—me, at 35 years old, being sent right back to a classroom desk...
But hey, at least I’m keeping everyone entertained—my classmates, the instructor, you name it....😁

So, how's it going for you?😬
Honestly, I haven't even sat for an exam since mid-2005. I can barely even look at a book lately, let alone try to study. I actually forced myself to start reading "Lullaby" just the other day, but I hit the halfway point and just handed it right back to the library.

Sam Smith3 said:Man, if you really want to know... when I finally showed up back on the forums a few days ago after being gone for two whole years—and saw you and all your posts—my first thought was just, "Who is this person?!... Wow."
And hey, coming from my neck of the woods, too...

Confidence is one of those things—you don't really have it unless you actually learn how to lean into it. It’s already inside all of us, waiting there...

Are you seriously talking about me? 🙈 😂

Taylor Howard36 said:where? maybe in Chicago? 😬

Oh yeah,
definitely 😁!

Sam Smith3 said:Man, seriously... I'm actually sitting here about to take this certification exam right now... you could've given me some pointers!
For real though...

I'm a terrible teacher—I can't explain things well and nobody ever understands me.😬
So, what part of the certification is tripping you up? I'm guessing it's the database stuff or maybe the information and communication modules?

Taylor Howard36 said:no, computer science 😬 😍

and me too 😍

At first glance, everything looks totally sorted out in my life

So, I’m 25 years old, I've got a steady job, and my own place...

I don't really have anyone right now—the last time I actually went on a date was about a year and a half ago... and honestly, you’d think I’d have more luck than that! Since then, it’s just been a string of failed attempts because I tend to overthink things or come off like I'm not even interested when I am...
Plus, the places I usually hang out aren't exactly hotspots for meeting new people, you know?

Sam Smith3 said:Could you maybe expand on that a bit... what exactly were you getting at... neighbor?
🙂
Please don't take my post the wrong way...

Okay, so here are a few examples:
When I was a kid—up until about age 10—I was incredibly clumsy, and honestly, just pretty scrawny. I’d constantly spill soup, break stuff, or even just end up hurting myself😬 (they used to call me "Accident Magnet"). I actually got punished for it quite a bit... which really did a number on my self-esteem. But despite all that, I was still the happiest kid in the family.
Now, that wasn't a huge deal on its own, but the real struggles hit right before and during puberty. Basically, by 5th grade, almost all my peers had outgrown me and were significantly stronger physically. It was actually the time when they started distancing themselves from me based on looks—which carries over to this day, actually! I was terrible at sports. In 8th grade, I tried playing basketball, but since I was so short, the coach almost never gave me a chance... that really stung. I also ended up in a lot of fights because kids would mess with me, and since they were a head taller than me, I usually ended up taking the brunt of the beating...

High school was finally my turning point. I changed my whole approach and became one of those guys who actually messes with others—plus, I hit a massive growth spurt, especially during freshman and sophomore year (I'm 6'1" now). Even though I quit basketball (because of everything mentioned earlier), I played it almost every single day and started absolutely crushing it. I actually had some social status in high school, which felt pretty cool. But my appearance was still a major hurdle. People constantly told me I looked two or three years younger than I was, and man, that sucked. Especially since I liked girls my own age or slightly older. Younger girls didn't interest me, so I’d only hang out with them just to take the edge off my hormones.

Also, through that whole period, everyone kept telling me I was too skinny and needed to bulk up, but I just couldn't put on weight—so later on, I took up water polo to try and fix that.

During my junior and senior years, things finally started looking up. I managed to forget most of those issues, had success with girls, and my confidence shot up rapidly. When I headed off to college, things kept getting better and better (even if I was disappointed with the school itself); I actually had some really great relationships through my junior year. But then, around my senior year, I started to "crack." Taking exams became harder and harder, and after a while, I ended up seeing a psychiatrist.
By my sophomore year, I was on all sorts of medications. My confidence plummeted to zero, I couldn't maintain a steady relationship, and my concentration and memory were basically non-existent.
It feels like that happy person from before was someone else entirely. Lately, I've started remembering all those negative things from childhood and puberty, and those old patterns are starting to resurface.

My conscious mind thinks, "Hey, I look good, I've got a great build, I'm smart..." and honestly, people really do think I'm super confident—some even think I'm arrogant. But it's my subconscious that's holding me back! Subconsciously, I still feel too skinny, I still feel like I look too young (even though women about eight years older than me flirt with me), and I feel incapable or stupid (since I'm a college grad who hasn't been able to pass classes for a while now).
Physically speaking, I don't have a single complex, but mentally... well...

So, yeah... this is probably my longest post ever, but I feel a lot better now that I've gotten all that off my chest. 🙂

What are your thoughts on this? Honestly, I feel like I’m right in the middle of it myself... 😲

restlessmarlin6 said:Besides, any guy under 220 pounds isn't even worth considering anyway😍

—just like how a woman isn't much of anything without curves like Kylie Minogue or a figure like Monica Bellucci, right?

Ditch the soda and those processed deli meats. Instead of grabbing sugary cereal, try switching to some good old-fashioned oats. For protein, stick to meat whenever you can—ideally fish or chicken breast. As for fats, try to get them from things like olive oil, flaxseed, or avocado oil rather than animal fats. Grab some whole grain bread, too. And honestly? Just stick to water most of the time. If you need a snack in between meals, some fresh low-fat cottage cheese or a tin of tuna works wonders. You definitely need to pack in more veggies—and don't forget some fruit! Also, you’re probably overdoing it on the milk...

@Steven Green2 I actually think 30% fat is a bit much. Personally, I’d aim for around 20%, maybe bumping up the carbs just a little bit so they roughly match the protein intake.

Honestly, BMI is such a garbage metric! Please, don't use it as your North Star. It completely ignores how you're actually built—things like bone density and frame size matter so much... especially when you look at athletes. By those standards, most pros would be labeled "overweight" when they’re actually just packed with muscle. And let's face it, muscle is way denser than fat.
Personally, I think that old-school rule of thumb works way better: take your height and subtract 100 for guys (assuming your body fat isn't over 20%—ideally around 16% if you aren't an athlete) and then subtract 110 for women (with a slightly higher body fat allowance).
Take me, for example—I've got a pretty light, slender bone structure, so being 6'1" and 187 lbs looks absolutely great on me! 🙂

I feel like my body and my soul are just totally out of sync—it’s almost like I’m starting to act just like my buddy Marshall

Sophia White said:Christina...?

😁 🤣

Petra...?
😁 🤣