Well, my little one actually knew all about guardian angels and how to make the sign of the cross before she even hit first grade, despite the fact that our family hasn't practiced any kind of faith for a single second in our lives. I have to give credit where it's due, though—it was entirely thanks to her preschool teacher, who didn't hesitate for a moment to pass on her own personal convictions to the kids. And she wasn't just talking about religion; she’d go on about how eating meat is wrong or how gummy bears are basically pure evil ☕.
The absolute joys of raising children in America...
Austin Vaughn3 said:From what I've seen raising two school-aged kids, you're right. Schools are supposed to be educational and developmental institutions, but in practice, they are strictly academic. Everything is focused on the curriculum, whether the kids are performing well or struggling. If there are behavioral issues or social hurdles, don't expect help. They'll point out the problem to you, and that's it. Once you realize your child is your responsibility and yours alone, it gets easier. You'll know who to rely on—yourself—and you'll stop looking for solutions from them. I'm not trying to be optimistic here, but it's the truth. Most schools operate this way. The sooner you accept it, the better you can plan. They aren't going to work on your child's social skills; they're going to focus on 1st period math, 2nd period English, 3rd period PE, and 4th period social studies. Get it? You have to handle the socialization. Read the books, seek advice, practice at home, talk to them, get them involved in extracurriculars, etc.
Also, you've hit on two main points. No one is collaborating with you, and no one is really engaging with the child either. Plus, you and the teacher clearly have different philosophies regarding socialization versus that "herd of obedient sheep" mentality. She hasn't responded to your requests for cooperation yet, which might actually be for the best. If you try to force her to change her methods to match yours, you won't achieve anything.
The priority is protecting your kid. Don't frame school as some terrible place; minimize the negativity and keep offering them ways to navigate it.
Good luck.
After spending two and a half years navigating the American school system, I can personally vouch for every single word said here. Their goal seems to be producing a flock of average, obedient students where no one stands out. They have zero interest in dealing with anyone on an individual basis beyond the bare minimum (like if a student is struggling with the material); they much prefer managing the group as a whole. All problems are ultimately shifted onto the children and the parents. They always wash their hands of any responsibility or extra effort, especially when it involves taking initiative (and I'm primarily talking about the "developmental" aspect, though the academic side isn't much better either). Ultimately, everything boils down to making sure your child comes out of the American school system with as little damage as possible.
Church Wedding 😂 So, I’ve got some guy trying to lecture me on my actual wedding day about how "the husband is the head of the household"... honestly, how did I even survive this long without his expert guidance? 🤣
I belong to the generation where religious studies was introduced as an elective. They couldn't even manage to pull enough students together for a single class during the mid-term break. I honestly suspect these "stellar" results—which are purely from an optional (and largely unmonitored) curriculum—are exactly what led us to this point. It seems young Americans weren't actually as eager to attend those classes as certain people would love to believe 😁 . I still remember being asked in my freshman year of high school art class who knew that the Bible is divided into the Old and New Testaments—maybe ten of us out of thirty knew the answer. Either we were mostly the kids of old-school government officials, or perhaps faith simply wasn't as widespread among the population as modern media outlets shamelessly claim it is these days. I mean, if you were raised in a religious household, you’d surely know at least the absolute basics...
driftinggull83 said:I suppose I misspoke; it isn't that I’m trying to go against the grain, it's just that I find it rather pathetic when everyone else seems to be moving forward while I’m left behind. I really ought to get my head straight on this matter before September rolls around. 😵
Well, don't go into this thinking he'll be the lone wolf. Don't commit him to it just yet; if it turns out he actually is the only one going this fall, you'll still have time to change your mind. It's much easier to pivot now than to sign him up only to realize there are actually plenty of others participating after all.😉
driftinggull83 said:Honestly, this whole situation is just grim. My kid starts school this year, and this was quite literally the final straw—there is absolutely no way they'll be participating in religious education classes. What’s the actual landscape like for outliers like us in the Chicago public school system? What percentage of a typical class actually signs up for those courses? And what do the other kids end up doing instead?
It really depends on the specific neighborhood and the individual school, so I’d definitely suggest checking in locally to see how things are handled in your district. In our local elementary school, about 7 out of 24 first graders didn't attend. By second and third grade, a couple of those kids moved away, but two more decided to opt out too, so we still have 7 students skipping the sessions. During those periods, they usually hang out in the library or in a teacher's classroom (mostly using the time to catch up on math homework). Starting in third grade, the school schedules that block at the very beginning or end of the day, so those kids often just head home early.👍
I'm enrolling my younger one in school right now, and naturally, he won't be attending religion classes either, even if he ends up being the only one left in the room.😉
Having this video on hand could be a huge help for the witnesses before the trial actually kicks off; it might give them a chance to refresh their memories regarding exactly what they heard at the clock tower that day.😉
because you can't just shove 1,000 people into a med program just because there isn't enough lab space or equipment.
Maybe we should look at some Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) principles here? I actually mentioned earlier that during freshman year, there aren't really any hands-on labs—it's mostly just online lectures and computer-based exams. Once you hit sophomore year, enrollment is limited to the first group of students based on available capacity for lab sessions, mentorship programs, and so on. Everyone else might need to consider a different major or university altogether 😁 Personally, I think offering three attempts without charging an extra fee would be a much fairer approach.
I honestly think that high school math level is more than enough for an administrative role at the USSF, especially given how their specific curriculum is structured.
If someone didn't have a great foundation back in high school, they could easily get caught up in about six months if they have a bit of a knack for numbers and find themselves with a solid professor. Personally, I’d say let them enroll in whatever college degree they're interested in first; after that first year, it becomes pretty obvious who has the aptitude and who doesn't. Plus, with the rise of online lectures and digital exams, reaching those milestones could happen so much faster. Once they pass that initial hurdle, they could move straight into practical training during their second year. This would solve so many headaches regarding high school graduation gaps, entrance exams, and inconsistent grading standards. Though, I have my doubts that anything like this will ever actually catch on in our incredibly rigid and outdated higher education system, particularly when it comes to state-funded institutions...
I honestly think we should implement a standardized set of uniform exams at the end of every grade level for all students. We could use those scores as the primary metric for high school admissions. Plus, let's be real—we should publish the results by school and even by teacher. It’s about time we actually see who is truly pulling their weight and delivering quality education versus who isn't. If we made these results public for a few years, I’m convinced it would finally spark a much-needed conversation about merit-based evaluation instead of just focusing on seniority and tenure.
Take the recent data from Lincoln High, for example. Out of four different fourth-grade classes, five students from one single class hit the top 10% bracket, while the other two classes only had one student each make the cut, and one class didn't have anyone in the top tier at all. It's the exact same school with the exact same demographic of parents... so how is it possible that the kids in that one specific classroom are thinking so critically and solving problems so effectively while everyone else is lagging so far behind?
If the exam provides a data table showing population density figures for various states—and you're expected to extract that info to determine which ones are crowded and which are sparse—then those teachers who suddenly claim we shouldn't have memorized everything are actually onto something. They'd argue it’s more about data literacy and analysis than rote memorization.
But, on the flip side, if the test just asks them to categorize states by density based on facts they've already committed to memory... well, then we're right back to square one with pure cramming.
And honestly, who knows? Maybe, as some have suggested, they might even let students pull out their phones mid-test to Google the population density of Uzbekistan. Because, clearly, that is a vital piece of information we all need to master for our daily lives in America.🙂
frozenrider15 said:Objective or not, it triggered exactly the kind of emotional response they were aiming for in that child. Think about it. What kid is going to choose sitting in a church on a Sunday over a trip to Disneyland, or walking into a private booth to confess their sins to a complete stranger?
That whole confession segment is hard for me to stomach, if not outright unacceptable. It looks like we’re skipping Communion altogether; I just can't find a way to frame that act as something beautiful or palatable for a nine-year-old.
On the other hand, my little girl sees going to Mass as a social outing—a chance to hang out with friends and hear about God, who encourages people to be better to one another. Our local priest gives sermons that I actually find acceptable; he stays away from politics and uses language appropriate for children. As long as it remains like that, she’ll want to go. If I wanted to present things differently—to make them more enticing—I could. Sure, I’m technically just stating facts and procedures, but I could easily pivot to evoke pleasant emotions that she would associate with her religious studies. Honestly, I’d go so far as to call it a form of manipulation on my part.
That is precisely the point. It feels like this has been the topic for the last couple of pages—this idea that kids don't actually want to go to service on Sundays; they'd much rather sleep in, catch a baseball game, or head out on a hike. If parents had just given them a clear, honest explanation a few years back, we wouldn't all be standing outside the church every Sunday, moping and dragging grumpy kids along with us. Personally, if that were the case, I'd be tucked under a warm blanket reading a good book while they slept, enjoying the blissful silence of an empty house. I try to be honest with myself about what I actually want or don't want. If my child had expressed a genuine interest, maybe I would have gone just to please them. But trying to force them into something that even *I* am not feeling? I'm not that naive.
frozenrider15 said:It really all comes down to how things are packaged.😉 Someone who actually wants kids to participate will frame the entire "protocol" in a positive light.
As for my own presentation of the protocol, I truly believe I kept it objective—neither leaning positive nor negative. I simply focused on laying out the facts and the actual procedures without letting my own emotions or interpretations bleed in. For instance, I didn't include my personal thoughts on the religious curriculum or any opinions regarding the supernatural nature of the "waffle."
Susan James said:A priest doesn't belong in a public school. Whether it's for communion prep or a blessing of the bread, it's just not appropriate. I really don't get what the school thinks they're gaining by offering that. 🤷
The fact that the priest won't acknowledge the school teacher's curriculum and demands extra sessions is a whole other issue. It just highlights how absurd this entire situation is, especially when parents actually go along with it.
I wouldn't say they don't recognize it; far from it. It’s more like if you don't attend the school-based classes, you can't take communion. And if you skip the parish sessions, you're out of luck there too. In marketing terms, it’s basically cross-selling. No matter which program you sign up for, they bundle the other one in because they’re tied together. It keeps everyone at the local parish office busy, I suppose. 😁
Personally, I don't get too wrapped up in all this since my kid doesn't participate in either. Though, she did ask me once if she could take communion because she heard people get little gifts out of it. So, I gave her the full rundown: I told her she’d have to spend three years in religious ed classes at school first, and then in the third year, she wouldn't be able to join us on our weekend trips or sleep in whenever she wants because she'd have to be at Mass early Sunday morning. Then, she’d have to take an additional class at the church, and finally, she’d have to sit in some tiny little room at the rectory and confess all her mistakes to a complete stranger, all just to end up with a tiny piece of a wafer. Needless to say, her interest vanished instantly.
rowdypanther12 said:Bread holidays shouldn't be religious at all. 😢 I don't find myself praying when everyone else starts doing it; I just don't see the point. My kid is the same way, though they haven't really been put to the test yet.
Well, I don't do it either. It never occurs to me to act like someone I'm not. I have actually dealt with comments from believers suggesting I should cross myself just "out of politeness"—which always leaves me feeling like I'm taking their faith more seriously than they actually do! Is pretending to show devotion really considered better than being genuine? To me, that kind of performance is honestly off-putting, but apparently, to them, it's preferred.
In the end, though, my self-respect wins out every time. I can't bring myself to hide what I truly believe.
As for the Harvest Day festivities, I think it's definitely a bit of an RKT idea that they've pushed everywhere, but I'll say this: it doesn't bother me. I don't feel the need to say, "With a blessing and a prayer, we thank God for the bounty." I actually think the explanation of the goal and purpose behind this day is quite lovely (you can check out the details on the Beautiful Our Mother organization's pages).
coppermarlin14 said:My kids absolutely love religion class... mainly because they don't actually have to attend it. 😂
We celebrate Christmas and I believe in God... I just don't have any desire to sit in a church pew listening to people spout nonsense. I don't really buy into the idea that God only exists within those four walls. Plus, I’m not interested in handing over my hard-earned money just so priests and clergy can live in luxury. I don't think my life will magically improve if I force my children to go to service, and I certainly don't want them sitting there being fed all sorts of baseless claims. To be honest, they aren't interested either. My youngest was attending until the fifth grade, but he eventually decided to opt out himself because he just couldn't stand listening to the absurdity of it all. Even though I bought him the textbooks, he refuses to touch them. I actually have some fifth-grade religious education books sitting around; if anyone needs them, I'd be happy to sell them for half price.
I don't mind the holiday plays or celebrations surrounding Christmas and Easter... the kids can cross themselves when it's appropriate.
Well, my actual concern would be a school play where they expect children to "cross themselves when necessary," simply because my kids don't have anything to cross themselves for. Fortunately, there wasn't a priest present during the end-of-semester religious song program, though one did show up for the "Bread Day" event—which resulted in my child skipping it altogether. I'm perfectly fine with that, honestly, since those types of things feel like a religious ritual being pushed under the guise of a general appreciation for nature.
silentraven6 said:We had four. Have you guys sat down for a parent-teacher conference yet? I’m guessing if you did, you might be seeing similar numbers.
Well, we haven't had our back-to-school nights just yet; those aren't happening until next week. And honestly, this "top secret" information is surprisingly hard to track down—even if you go asking during the meetings! Of course, once classes actually get rolling, it won't take long at all to figure out how many kids are in each group. On our side, the schedule includes a block period in the morning, which is great. I’m really hoping they stick with that! 🙂
silentraven6 said:It looks like our local school district is switching to block scheduling this year, which means my kid might actually get two or three hours of religion class all at once on certain days. 🎉If those blocks happen to fall on a Friday afternoon, man, that’s going to be a sweet deal!
Speaking of how they schedule these things, I honestly don't get the logic behind this nonsense—giving them two hours for religion but then only one hour each for music and art...
I'm curious, what kind of attendance are you seeing in your classrooms lately? In my experience, we had about 6 kids out of 23 missing last year.
It seems like everything in our education system works this way—it really just comes down to luck and which school you happen to land in. I personally just checked "No" for religion classes on my enrollment forms, and honestly, that’s been enough to get me through all three years so far.
Andrew Doyle said:I am putting serious pressure on the principal because the current schedule is an absolute joke—they have religious studies shoved right in the middle of the school day 😠
Does anyone know if there is actually any mechanism in this supposedly "secular" country that would allow students in public schools to receive actual education instead of just being forced to stand awkwardly in the hallway? And let’s be real, not every school has a library staffed all day to provide a legitimate alternative for them.
Are we talking about the first four grades? You might want to suggest officially scheduling something like a supplemental or remedial hour for a different subject if it isn't formally on the timetable yet—that way your child can attend that instead. If they can't find a workaround, they’ll at least have to provide a classroom and a teacher for that period. From what I understand, teachers are technically required to cover a certain number of extra or remedial hours, but honestly, the oversight and planning for that are pretty lackluster. Even then, the library won't always be an option; the librarian might be away at training or busy prepping a leadership group. My advice? Try to figure out how many other parents are in the same boat. Connect with them and apply pressure as a group. It's much more effective than trying to tackle this solo.