Posts by Kevin Nguyen3

Since I am participating in the >, it feels incredibly difficult—almost impossible, really—to express myself within the constraints of the > subforum.
Even though I am making every effort to respect the established guidelines.
The thing is, a moderator’s note—and I don't even need colored text to prove this—doesn't actually stop me from sharing my own experiences, my visions, my forecasts, and things of that nature.
A little comment along the lines of... "maybe you should read the thread from the beginning..." forced my hand, leading me to offer an apology to all the participants in this discussion.
But once I actually started reading through the thread, and after about 20 or 30 pages of content, I realized that I was essentially retracting my apology; in fact, I believe the moderator's intervention was absolutely unnecessary.
I am talking about the moderator, Sam Green73.
Let me be clear: I am withdrawing my apology.
I would strongly suggest that the same moderator read this entire thread from page one to see what has been permitted and what has been sanctioned without justification.
The rule stating, "Insulting other forum members is not allowed—though, as you already know," hasn't been followed for even a single moment. People have been writing whatever they want.
For instance, look at the rule: "Also, referring to peoples, nations, or social groups using derogatory or offensive names is strictly prohibited and will result in sanctions."
Let’s jump back to the topic and try to evaluate this objectively, while simultaneously trying to find a single post that isn't stained by nationalistic (or any other kind of) hatred.
Some users here are grayed out, but most are not, obviously.
I haven't received any points or a warning card, which makes such a supposedly "casual" or "incidental" move by the moderator completely unjustifiable.
I am asking the admins to please look into these matters. There is a proper way to issue and receive a moderator's warning. This forum isn't anyone's private playground where a user has to wonder why someone is moderating a topic they clearly know nothing about.

Alexander Martinez5 said:The way Americans view wealth feels so much more organic, just totally unburdened... it’s all about living in the now, whereas over here, it’s like everyone is obsessively stockpiling just to prepare for the afterlife or whatever... It’s honestly kind of darkly hilarious when you see people trying to extract their entire sense of purpose from these superficial side quests, and then those same shallow things end up being the only thing giving them a sense of status or just driving them straight into total frustration. I see these washed-up social climbers and Botoxed-out trophy wives who, because of how they grew up, genuinely believe they were cast in gold, and then on the flip side, you’ve got these paranoid types who act like they're constantly under siege... Honestly, both groups just look grotesque to me. To my mind, the only people with any real direction or soul are those who value themselves and others through actual humanity—people who actually trust their own wits and their own hard work... But these other folks? They’re just prisoners of their own delusions and that old-school mentality where having stuff is the only way to prove you actually exist.

Our cultural conditioning fundamentally limits our ability to grasp Western attitudes in general.
Even if we concede that life in the West might be easier—meaning material goods are more accessible—does that truly equate to greater happiness or the fulfillment of one's dreams? I don't think so.
The author is approaching her question with such refreshing sincerity, from what I can tell. She subconsciously understands the root of the issue and is searching for a way to detach herself from these intrusive thoughts. She isn't even entirely sure why they surface in the first place.
She doesn't want this mindset.
In just a few sentences, she begins to construct her own framework. She is already conscious of what actually makes her happy.
Yes, it is an unfortunate truth that in certain parts of our society, having things defines who you are. We aren't going to change that overnight, so what is left for us? Perhaps all we can do is embrace what we have and learn to truly value it.

Susan Carter2 said:Total loser vibe here— I seriously can’t stop hanging out with people who love to lecture me just because they’re my bosses at work. One lady keeps dropping these little bombs like, "loans are for idiots," or "women over thirty are basically useless for having kids, so it's now or never," and it honestly triggers this massive anxiety because, let's be real, we simply cannot afford a kid right now. People act like both things are purely my choice or my desire, failing to realize that our actual circumstances are calling the shots.

Kevin Nguyen3— Man, I love this post. It totally lifted my spirits. Honestly, I feel like printing this out, tucking it in my wallet, and pulling it out whenever the dark thoughts start creeping in. I really needed a perspective from someone who isn't currently drowning in the same stuff I am. Don't get me wrong, I'm fully aware of how priceless the things you mentioned are—love, respect, being supported, and having a spiritual life full of emotion and understanding... That's my priority too, and I thank my husband for that every single day. But still, I get these phases where, for some reason, I start obsessing over material things that are actually relevant to my life, and my brain starts comparing itself to everyone else, leading to those "this just isn't fair" spirals. Like Kymatica says—it's a total loop.

Zek0slav — Up until now, everything I've achieved has been through pure grit and hard work, and I plan to keep it that way, but I'm starting to question this idea: "You'll be more satisfied in life if you achieve it all on your own." Are people who get the exact same thing thanks to someone else really less happy? Like I said before, "It's not like people who inherit wealth cry themselves to sleep because they didn't earn it themselves." I don't think my friend, who lives a stress-free life in an apartment his dad bought him and can provide everything for his wife and kid without any mortgage hanging over his head, is any less satisfied. I bet he's incredibly happy, regardless of whether he earned it himself.
I totally agree with the rest of your post, which is why I mentioned that we were essentially "schooled" by them (and I mean that in a grateful way).

Dawn— I totally feel you. Your goat joke actually made me laugh! And yeah, those situations definitely exist—like inheriting a house in a location that's impossible to flip, and then having to deal with all the legal paperwork to make it official.

When I talk about inheritance, I’m specifically talking about receiving something that gives you even a tiny head start in life, giving you a platform to build upon through your own work. Something that grants you the freedom to actually choose your career path and such. I'm not talking about the kind of inheritance people "expect" or sit around waiting for while their parents are still alive. I'm not talking about those cases where people change their entire personality before or after getting an inheritance, or use it as an excuse to skip school or stop working hard altogether.

Yes, it really is vital to look at your children (and your husband, of course) every single day and be fully, truly conscious of the happiness there. Of the wealth in that.
Of course, wouldn't it be even more wonderful to have something handed to you that you didn't have to break your back to earn? But then again, one has to ask: is it even realistic to think someone could earn a house, a car, and everything else within a single lifetime?
And don't even get me started on the cost of schooling, clothes, food, and all those other essentials.
But we shouldn't turn this into some sort of tragedy, because let's face it—it's just not realistic.
I will be left with a little something, but to me, it isn't some massive jackpot like winning the Powerball, nor do I view it as some monumental stroke of luck in my life.
In truth, my heart feels much more at peace simply knowing that she is still healthy and alive.
And when the time comes that I inherit those assets, I will pass it all down to my children so they won't have to endure the same struggles I had to face.
But until that moment arrives, I refuse to burden myself with things I don't currently possess.
You are a happy woman, whether there is an inheritance involved or not. There... that's it.😉

I have this friend whose older brother left him an apartment and a vacation home—though honestly, the "home" is more like a glorified prefab shack.
It sounds like a dream scenario, right? Except for one tiny detail: he also inherited a massive mortgage that’s barely even started being paid down. On top of that, there are utility bills piling up—water, electricity, you name it—running into thousands of dollars. What started as a shocking surprise quickly turned into a harsh reality check.
Once he realized exactly what kind of mess both of them had stepped into, he found himself cursing his luck for ever accepting the inheritance in the first place.
It just goes to show, doesn't it? Sometimes an inheritance is nothing more than a heavy burden rather than a gift.

silvertiger11 said:The starting line is just a collection of circumstances that neither they nor you can control. And let’s face it, people just love to give unsolicited advice. The real question is how much of that noise you're going to allow into your head.
Personally, if you believe that owning real estate is the ultimate metric of success, then you should strive to acquire those assets on your own terms. You'll find much more satisfaction in life if you earn them yourself, even if the sheer quantity is lower than the people you're comparing yourself to.
In my view, the whole concept of relying on someone else's luck to achieve success is fundamentally flawed and frankly quite foolish. At most, one can hope that their parents ensure they are healthy, well-fed, and educated. Anything beyond that is either pure luck or individual grit.

My folks aren't leaving me much, either.
But they certainly sacrificed a lot over the years to raise my sister and me. We always step up for each other whenever we can. I won't be acting like a servant in their old age, but I can always expect to be there for them within my means.

From what I've seen, there is usually one generation that breaks its back to build something up, only for the next generation to blow through all that hard-earned fruit without having any clue what sacrifice actually looks like. In the end, everyone ends up worse off than they should have been.

That is an excellent way to look at it.
It often seems—though perhaps I am being too cynical or perhaps I am just right—that many children are practically counting down the days until their parents pass away just so they can inherit the family estate or a windfall of cash, simply because they feel their parents aren't "young" anymore.
Am I mistaken? Perhaps.
My mother is ill and, objectively speaking, quite elderly, but the very thought of leaving her to the mercy of fate just so I could pad my bank account never even crosses my mind.
Is this a question of morality? Is it ethics? I truly do not know.
But it is a sad truth that a certain envy or jealousy often takes hold of people; they resent those who seemingly haven't earned anything, while those who live modestly and take immense pride in their own labor never seem to get even a fraction of that luck...
It brings to mind that old classic movie where the patriarch, old Pantelija, left everything to himself when he passed.
In an atmosphere defined by such general greed and a literal hunger for money, could he have really done any differently?🤣

Benjamin Robinson3 said:Just like a tsunami... And I feel like I haven't learned anything because I keep making the exact same mistakes even though I know I shouldn't. I can't seem to move away from this dead end where I always react the same way.
Antidepressants seem like a lot, so I figured I'd start with the lesser evil 😬
I'll definitely look for a book or check things out online, thanks so much 🙂

To’s actually what I was thinking, Doc. I can tell him anything without him looking at me like I’ve lost my mind or laughing in my face. So I know if I just approach him directly with the right arguments, he’ll actually listen.
That’s why I asked about something that handles the emotions too, so I don't end up having an outburst or something. I don't want to just walk around like a zombie; I want to actually feel things—or rather, manage how I feel.
So far, psychotherapy without medication hasn't really done the trick...

It’s not that it doesn't help, it’s just that constantly trying like an idiot only to have everyone screw me over again gets on my nerves. Honestly, I just don't have the will anymore. People are generally all the same brand of garbage; it's just a matter of when they decide to show how much garbage is inside them.

So, what you're saying is we choose our own company? When we get "screwed over," is it a sign that we chose that path ourselves, or perhaps we simply didn't see it coming?
Everyone makes mistakes.
In my view, people aren't just piles of garbage—they are more like sources of inspiration or life lessons. Perhaps that is how you should try to view others?
If you go into something knowing there is a chance you might be deceived or exploited, then accept that reality. If you do, you can walk away from such a relationship as a winner.
Take that predictable dynamic and use it for your own benefit.
You could even play along—perhaps even amplify certain traits in someone—just to see if they truly are who they claim to be, or perhaps to test yourself? To see how much knowledge and intuition you actually possess to discern someone's true qualities?
That can actually be quite interesting, and it provides excellent motivation for future relationships.
Over time, you will realize that people are fundamentally all the same—but you already know that, don't you? So, every new friendship or encounter can be treated as a genuine experience and a lesson learned.😉

Look, I’m not in quite that same position—thankfully (though even that is a massive question mark)—as I have either already inherited, or am set to inherit, some material assets, whether it be cash, land, or a house.
The real question is: how much of all that is actually luck, and just how much does it concretely make life easier?
It would be easiest to simply say, "just accept it," but at the end of the day, there isn't really an answer to that, is there?
I see people all around me who have inherited immense wealth, yet they aren't happy, or their lives are nothing short of hell.
Perhaps we should look instead at what a person currently possesses: a marriage, a family, their own little roof over their head, love, respect, being valued, having someone to lean on.
In reality, so many people drive a BMW, but everything else is slipping through their fingers. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately), certain things simply cannot be bought, and because we take what we do have for granted, we find ourselves in a state of eternal dissatisfaction.
I want more, certainly; perhaps to ease some basic needs, to handle daily life without constantly worrying about how to carve out a little extra just to have one more detail.
Tomorrow, it will be from my children. The day after, it will be from my elderly and ailing parents.
Subconsciously, even though we know we are expecting things given our current situation, we cannot help but overlook what we already hold dear—and in your case, that is your relationship and your marriage.
Don't you think that many people here are looking at your little slice of happiness with a certain kind of jealousy?!
Some people on these forums have a house, a nice expensive car, a beach house or a vacation home, maybe even a bank account in Switzerland, and yet they are miserable their entire lives.
And regardless of what we might think—that their material status will significantly aid them in making life choices—the fact is, it just doesn't happen.
Why bring this up now?
A rich spiritual life, full of emotion and understanding, is not something you can buy!
And even if you had vastly more than you do now, you still couldn't love any more, nor could you be loved any more.

Benjamin Robinson3 said:Nonsense like "socializing" has been a total waste of my entire life.
I wouldn't say what I said without some actual reasoning behind it.
And let's be real, life is still a struggle even when you are social.

Socialization is a science! It isn't some piece of bubblegum you can just chew on and change flavors whenever you feel like it. If you don't feel like any form of socialization is actually helping you, then either you haven't truly grasped its power and importance, or—and this is a hard truth to face—you simply lack the capacity to be anything more than what you currently are or can be.☕

Benjamin Robinson3 said:Which psychotropic med would you recommend for someone who just wants to become a blank slate?
I know everyone else is out there trying to "feel better," get social, and all that nonsense... I just want to feel nothing at all. No emotions whatsoever.

Giving advice like that would be, at the very least, completely immoral.
Medication is meant to help a person heal, isn't it? It's meant to cure, not to make you sick.
And this idea about socializing being "nonsense"... don't you see how much easier it makes communication and life in general?
Before you go poisoning yourself and turning your entire existence into a cycle of suffering—both mental and physical—perhaps you should actually study the art of socialization.
It’s much easier that way.

rowdycobra10 said:I was wondering if anyone could explain the actual difference between Sanval and Cerson? I used to be prescribed Sanval—the first pill I took basically floored me, and the second one did the same, though it felt more like I was just eating candy rather than taking an actual sedative. Once I switched over to Cerson, things actually got worse; it feels like it does absolutely nothing at all. To top it off, my dosage of Xanax has been increased, but the effect only lasts about 15-20 minutes before everything just goes right back to how it was :S

Well, here is the thing: Sanval contains zolpidem, which doesn't really act as a muscle relaxant for the body. On the other hand, Cerson contains nitrazepam, which works as an anticonvulsant and a muscle relaxant, but also functions as both a hypnotic and an anxiolytic.
That is the fundamental distinction right there.
There is also the matter of the elimination half-life—Cerson stays in your system for about 24 to 30 hours, whereas Sanval is out in roughly 2 hours. So, with Sanval, you don't really face that heavy "daytime sedation" risk.
As for dependency? It is the exact same story for both.
And then, of course, there are other nuances regarding administration methods and how they interact with other medications, among other things.

Paul Newman5 said:How did you handle all that experimenting? Personally, I'm so anxious that I'd have a panic attack—which I totally did at first—without anxiolytics. Were you working? Did you have other responsibilities you couldn't just walk away from? Don't take this the wrong way, I'm just asking so I can understand my own search better. This year has been a nightmare for me. You've got family stuff (cooking, cleaning, tidying up... they help, but only as much as they know how), and then there's work, which feels like walking into a firing squad. I can't do it; I'll crumble, snap, end up in a psych ward, lose my job, and then what am I supposed to live on? So, I started Xanax. Suddenly, anxiolytics became my daily life. That's why I'm digging so deep. I don't think like you do, and more than anything, I just want to wake up one morning with my antidepressants and Xanax being nothing but a memory.

It was brutal.
I kept working as long as I could; my employers were as patient as they could be, but times are what they are—eventually, it's just a severance package and a "thanks for everything" goodbye. Then came the divorce. And friends? They had already drifted away a long time ago.
Then, I found myself completely alone.
The crisis hit its peak. Suicide attempts, self-harm, and all those other senseless things.
And endless stretches of lying in various hospital beds.
But now? It’s all behind me. Life can be a total bitch, but it is still worth the struggle.😉

Paul Newman5 said:When I asked her, she just gave me this look. I don't take Sanval; I was just given it. I manage to sleep using Lexapro.
Obviously, nobody can force me to take anything, but did I ask for that? I'm asking what to take when none of these antidepressants actually hit the mark. What about people like us who spend months cycling through different ADs? We’re still anxious and on edge, but we still have to show up to work. My doctor isn't refusing to prescribe, it's just that nothing works except the anxiolytics.

I have literally spent years experimenting with all sorts of medications—some of which aren't even available anymore—plus I had a full evaluation and a brief course of treatment while I was over in the USA. Even that didn't really do the trick.
I think I mentioned this somewhere before, but Dr. Kramarić at Mayo Clinic advised me on this specific therapy I'm on now, and finally, someone actually hit the mark. If it hadn't been him, maybe someone else would have stepped up, or maybe I'd still be stuck in this endless cycle of trial and error even today.

Michelle Evans said:@Beyoncé, why so harsh on her? It’s unnatural and unhealthy when a child ends up acting like a parent to their own parents. Especially with an active, unaccountable father in the mix. And there’s really no sense in wondering why someone didn't seek help sooner. People struggle with mental health issues for years; many need time just to realize there's even a problem, and some never figure it out at all. Those who finally recognize they need help and decide to find it deserve our support. Tough love isn't always a bad approach, but it has to be used in the right context.

@Maria Myers3, this thread is specifically for exchanging information and support regarding schizophrenia. Feel free to post here. For general chatting and casual support, you can head over to this thread. 🙂
Unfortunately, until your mom starts taking her prescribed therapy consistently, things won't improve. Her father needs to get her to a doctor. It doesn't help to dwell on what should have been done differently to prevent this. Relapses happen even when people are following their treatment plans. It's better to focus on what can be done now to fix the situation.

I mentioned this once before, but she simply needs to commit to treatment. You might want to consult her primary care physician about the best next steps.

You've already taken the second step by deciding to seek professional help. It might be worth stopping by the Department of Social Services to see what resources are available. If your family is struggling financially and you're a top student, there might be scholarship opportunities out there—just a thought, you should definitely look into it.

And I honestly think your sister could really benefit from seeing a professional psychologist too.

The bluntness... it's intended to force us to hear the truths we usually choose to ignore. I am well aware that acting as a parent to one's own parents is unnatural, but in this specific situation, it is unfortunately the reality. The father isn't a pillar of strength here; from what I can gather, his self-esteem is non-existent and his courage has simply evaporated. The fact that he didn't even realize the mother wasn't following her treatment plan only proves my point.
There really is only one path left: all four of them must find a way to ease the burden for both her and himself. We have discussed lifestyle habits before, but here, the very foundation of life must change. They need to sit down and accept these new circumstances—it is the responsibility for actions taken, or rather, actions left undone.
I truly wish there were another way, I really do! But realistically, what other way could there possibly be?
So many people carry the weight of caring for their parents (myself included, especially regarding my own mother) because it is simply the only option. This case is unique only in one regard: the two of them might still be too young to have expected such a turn of events. No matter how much empathy we throw at it, age is no excuse here.
At first glance, I thought perhaps it was an official diagnosis. But it isn't.
I understand that people hesitate to admit to themselves or others that they are facing mental health challenges; or perhaps it is just pure ignorance.
But with trichotillomania, things are different. The consequences are painfully visible.
Because of that, I found myself momentarily wondering why this hadn't been identified as a problem sooner. What was gained by waiting?!
I suspect it likely started somewhere during puberty—which is a massive span of time—and has quite literally persisted for years.
Surely, the ultimate goal of my approach was to foster a better understanding of everything, and through that, provide some semblance of reasonable advice, a kind word, or actual help...😉

Jason Vaughn482 said:I know you’re taking Lexapro, but which other antidepressant are you pairing with it? I'm curious about the specific combination... and what do you mean by "it doesn't help"? Personally, even a half-dose of my 15 mg Lexapro knocks me out cold. I still rely on Ambien to get through the night, but the side effects—that restless urge to get up in the middle of the night and the midnight munchies—are becoming a real nuisance.

Well, look, my nightly routine consists of one 45 mg Clarissa, one 75 mg Velax, one Quetiapine at 200 mg, and one Lamictal at 25 mg (an anti-epileptic).
And honestly? This specific cocktail is what actually works for me.
By the way, just so we're clear, combining Clarissa and Velax isn't usually recommended because they don't play well together. I am fully aware of that risk, believe me, but I don't really have much of a choice here; this combination is what keeps me stable in the long run.
Listen... generally speaking, benzodiazepines are incredibly complicated medications. There are three main types, and there are actually more than 20 different kinds currently available on the market.
Some studies have even shown that after taking any kind of diazepam for just four weeks, about 35% of patients developed a dependency.
They can sometimes trigger the exact opposite effect too! Instead of calming you down, they might spike your anxiety or lead to depression, or even cause aggression or euphoria.
So, really, can anyone truly say for certain? Can we ever be absolutely sure about how these drugs will act on a person? No, we can't.

Paul Newman5 said:Sure, but what if none of the antidepressants work after a year of trying, and nobody will prescribe the antipsychotic? For example, I had to get mine from Dr. Sanval; I didn't just go out and buy it myself.
This is my second doctor in a year. I don't live in New York City where I can just switch private practitioners every week, and the waiting lists at public hospitals are months long. If I wanted to change doctors now, I might be waiting five months just to see someone else.
Look, you're right about the anxiolytics—I'd take two antidepressants and an antipsychotic if it meant feeling better—but I can't find the right fit on my own. Nothing has worked for a year. How am I supposed to calm the nerves and anxiety? Where am I supposed to go to finally get the right meds? What happens to those of us who can't find a working antidepressant?

You really have to sit down and have a serious talk with your psychiatrist about the fundamental issues, like your insomnia. Because how can you hope to resolve any other disorders if you aren't sleeping? You have to get enough rest; you have to let your body recover.
And suggest an AP. Why not propose to the doctor that you try one of the APs? I personally take Q-pin and it works for me. Whether it will work for you, well, I don't know.
It is best to have a very serious conversation with your psychiatrist.
The Sanval-psychiatrist might have been able to help you right at the start of your treatment, but at this stage, it might not do much good.
There is Halcion, which is perhaps one of the strongest hypnotics, but it also acts as a sedative and an anticonvulsant (for spasms).
There is always an option, and nobody can force you into anything; that is precisely why we have these discussions with our doctors.

Jason Vaughn482 said:Perhaps all that logic holds water, but when I start an antidepressant—take Lexapro, for instance—everything just falls apart; I can't sleep, and my anxiety spikes even worse than before. Or if I try something like Paxil, it knocks me out so completely that I feel like a total zombie the next day, which then makes me reach for Xanax just to function. So, what have I actually achieved? Maybe these specific meds just don't sit right with my chemistry, but with Xanax, things always seem manageable. It seems like everyone is on something; one person takes Xanax, another takes Klonopin, but almost nobody survives on antidepressants alone... at least from what I've gathered in my research. If I could just stumble upon an antidepressant that didn't leave me needing Xanax or battling insomnia, I would be the happiest person on earth.

I'm currently on two different antidepressants and one antipsychotic.
Not a single anxiolytic or anything like that.
And I sleep just fine.
We've touched on this a few times already, haven't we? For chronic, long-term insomnia, nothing really works unless you introduce an antipsychotic.

Maria Myers3 said:My dad was in charge of her medication, but Mom would lie about actually taking them—eventually, he just stopped trying. Honestly, we probably bear some blame for not watching closer, but we were only 14 at the time, and nobody had really sat us down to explain what was happening to her. I know she isn't going to get better. We talked to her a million times about seeing a doctor and staying on her meds, but she’d just start yelling and wander off, talking to herself. There is simply no way to reach her anymore. We've tried everything. I haven't received an official diagnosis yet, but I’m not naive enough to miss the symptoms of trichotillomania appearing in myself. I’ll be getting that sorted out in December when my appointment is scheduled. I have a boyfriend, whereas my sister doesn't—and I knew that once people read "17 and 18," they’d assume we're grown women capable of handling this ourselves. But like I said, the two of us are nowhere near being adults. If you saw us, you wouldn't even guess our ages; most people tell me I look 15 or 16, so... anyway, my boyfriend is younger than me, and this isn't his burden to carry—I have no intention of dragging him into something that won't do him any good. Thanks for the advice, regardless.

Are you actually suggesting that Dad wasn't managing her medication?
Because if he had been, we wouldn't be standing here in this mess, would we?
And this idea that NOBODY can reach her anymore? That simply isn't true. I know plenty of much worse cases—situations far more complicated than this—where people can still be reached to make life easier for them and everyone else involved.
Given how she is right now, some level of oversight is absolutely mandatory.
Your physical appearance doesn't change your age. Why even mention it? It's completely irrelevant. Even if you look like a teenager again, you are still eighteen. Please, just accept that you aren't a little girl anymore; you're trying to act like a responsible adult, and part of that means you can't just run away from your obligations. You have to face them head-on. You are an adult now, which means you can step up and take responsibility for Mom's medical care—specifically making sure she takes her prescriptions regularly.
As for this notion about not wanting to drag your boyfriend into all of this... honestly, that approach is fundamentally flawed.
How on earth do you expect to isolate him from your reality when his life is directly impacted by your condition and how you behave?
He needs to accept the situation alongside you, precisely because YOU need that support system when things get heavy. If you don't, you are just going to break down over time, and eventually, you'll be the one falling ill most of all, simply from the sheer stress of refusing to understand what's happening.
Trichotillomania. I am genuinely surprised you haven't sought professional help for that sooner.

fadedbear92 said:Plus, you aren't even experiencing "real" emotions anymore—they're just masked by the anxiolytic. Once you switch to an antidepressant, that changes; you won't feel like a zombie.

Exactly. Precisely so!😉
Helix just numbs everything out. It’s like... does anyone else feel that? That total loss of sensation? It's unsettling, really. Truly.😢

redtiger35 said:I’ve been dealing with an insane amount of stress over the last couple of weeks because of some personal stuff and work craziness, plus there’s been a full moon for the past few days, so my sleep has been absolutely non-existent. Honestly, taking Rivotril feels like I just swallowed a Tic Tac; it does zero for me. 😕 Normally, I should be switching to it in the evening instead of using Helex, but the timing always messes up—if I take the Rivotril at 8 PM, I’m wide awake until midnight worrying about how I can't sleep, and then I eventually take my usual dose of Helex, which finally lets my body relax and everything just settles into place. I don't know, Helex... I wouldn't call it a nasty addiction, because Helex actually keeps me steady and supports me, and I honestly don't know what I'd do without it. If anything, I’d say my best moments are when I'm on Helex, because I can finally just relax and give myself some freedom. The rest of the time is just pure suffering with frayed nerves, anxiety, insomnia, and mental pain. I know, I know... but what's so terrible about spending the rest of my life on Helex? 😢

The core issue—the real trouble here—lies with medications like anxiolytics or sedatives. You see, they create this cycle of dependency. It’s a physiological reality, isn't it? The body develops a tolerance to the drug. In other words, you find yourself needing a higher dose just to achieve that same baseline effect. How can one expect stability when the very chemistry of the body keeps shifting its requirements?
Addiction? It’s a phenomenon we all know too well, isn't it? A pervasive, undeniable reality that touches so many lives.
And there it is... that endless, vicious cycle. Isn't it just always like that? You think you've finally broken free, only to find yourself spinning right back into the exact same loop. It’s relentless, really. How does it even happen? One moment you're making progress, and the next, the circle closes again. It’s exhausting, isn't it?
You’re already telling me how much more liberated you feel on Helex—how things are clearer, sharper, better... doesn't that just say everything? It sounds like you can't even function without it anymore. I mean, wouldn't you assume that if you aren't taking it, you just feel terrible? And let's be honest, I bet you're dealing with a mountain of side effects on top of all that, too. Don't you think?
Is Helex actually effective during that initial stretch? I mean, for those first few weeks—maybe even up to two months—it seems quite useful for calming the nerves and just finding some semblance of relaxation while you wait for the AD to properly kick in and start doing its job. Isn't that the main point? To bridge that gap until the antidepressant finally takes hold?
As for everything else... honestly, what is even the point of staying on it long-term? It simply doesn't make sense! Does it actually address the root cause? No. Is that its primary objective? Certainly not. Why would one continue such a regimen when it isn't even designed to fix the underlying issue? It just feels futile, doesn't it?

Matthew Chavez said:Imagine if some random person just started dumping their life story on you, acting like you're suddenly their absolute best friend. It’s a lot to handle. 😳
The reality is you’re never going to find someone who checks every single box right out of the gate. It just doesn't work that way. 🙂

You just need a little more self-confidence and a way to vent all that negativity.

Good luck!

Of course—that’s exactly why someone bothers to write posts and seek advice or share experiences in the first place. It sounds like everything is perfectly fine "except" for two tiny little things—your confidence and an "outlet" (??) for venting.
What exactly am I supposed to do about it?
And I assume he is wondering the same thing. We aren't just posting for the sake of filling space; we are actually saying something specific here.
The issues definitely started when his mother passed away. If this were something that could be fixed with one hand tied behind your back, he wouldn't be posting here. At the very least, he needs a psychologist, maybe even a psychiatrist.
He became far too attached and grew too relaxed in his relationship with his father, so the separation—which he views as a "betrayal"—hit him incredibly hard. Though, really, that isn't even the point. It makes it look like the father abandoned his son to go find his own happiness, but that is a complete misinterpretation of the situation.
It’s not that you suppressed anything; it’s that you were blind and simply refused to admit to yourself that you were struggling.
You could go to a driving school in Chicago and take fifty-four hours of lessons in a single direction and you would experience the exact same thing everywhere. People aren't the problem; you are. You are running from yourself, even though you know deep down you can't escape. Real friendship is built over years, not by moving to a new city or changing schools.
Your weight and your physical appearance have absolutely nothing to do with any of this. Just forget about it.
Maybe start by looking online (or at a local library) for something regarding building up self-confidence. That might help.
But honestly, the best move is to see a doctor who can actually advise you on how to proceed.