Please move this thread
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Just realized this thread hasn't been moved yet.... 🤦 My bad... Thought it was posted in the wrong section... 😵
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Please move this thread
in Feedback & Suggestions ·
Hey, great topic. 👍
You make some good points, but honestly, it feels like you’re chasing a fantasy. Gravity doesn't run this world; money does. That's the snag. No one in charge is going to ditch their profits just to save the planet. This whole anti-plastic hysteria? It's mostly just a trend. Here in the States, since 2020, they've been phasing out plastic bags, replacing them with these things that look like plastic but are supposedly biodegradable. Sure, sounds nice. But if they try to swap plastic "to go" bottles for heavy glass, sales will tank, and companies won't touch that. Greedy corporations—and let's face it, they all are—aren't going to gamble their survival for an eco-friendly gesture. What about credit cards? We all carry several, and they're plastic. What about computer cases, screens, or the million other things we use daily?
What really gets to me is the mindless waste. We consume stuff so fast that our poor planet can't even begin to replenish itself. People don't even care about the air they breathe anymore; they're too busy endangering the environment by cutting down 30 million acres of forest every year. Even a five-year-old knows plants make the oxygen we need. But apparently, it's more important to clear out half of the Brazilian rainforest for a quick buck. When people prioritize profit over the survival of future generations, those people don't stand a chance.
I won't get into the weeds regarding air quality unless you want a novel, but here are some shots from around the US:
Italy: https://nation.com.pk/print_images/m...35114-8172.jpg
China on a typical day:
Air pollution kills 600,000 kids every single year. Innocent people get sick with various cancers and die through no fault of their own.
The destruction of the ozone layer—something 90% of people don't even realize matters—is one of the biggest threats we face. The sun hits Earth with all sorts of radiation, including ultraviolet rays. There are different types: UVA, UVB, and UVC.
The bulk of UVC radiation is absorbed by the ozone layer (if there is one left).
UVB hits the surface of the skin and directly damages DNA, causing burns.
UVA penetrates deep into the skin, leading to DNA mutations, tanning, and destroying collagen, which makes skin lose its elasticity. It also spikes melanoma risks because of free radical buildup.
You can see the differences here: https://suntribesunscreen.com/wp-con...7nnaupzx44.jpg
Now, about our planet's resources:
From an economic standpoint, humanity has been running a deficit since "Earth Day," because we've already burned through the entire year's worth of resources and have to borrow from the future. This state is called "Overshoot."
The Earth Day concept measures human demand against the global supply of natural resources and ecological capacity. Right now, after only seven months, we've already exhausted all renewable resources that should last at least a full year. We use economic terms like this so that regular people, not just scientists, can wrap their heads around it. Our lifestyle has pushed the planet past its breaking point. Every year, "Overshoot Day" moves earlier. That means we're exhausting the planet's annual budget sooner and sooner. This year, it hit on July 30th. Since then, we've been living on credit, overusing everything the Earth provides.
Here’s a breakdown of the dates and our consumption of Earth's resources over the last few decades:
Back in 1961, our annual consumption sat at just 0.73. That meant we actually had some breathing room left. We still had reserves.
Back on December 21, 1971, our consumption hit 1.01. That was the tipping point. It means we started burning through resources faster than Earth can actually replenish them in a year.
Consumption is just going to keep climbing next year. It's on an upward trajectory.
By December 19, 1987, we had already burned through all our available resources. For the rest of that year, we were consuming way faster than Earth could actually replenish itself.
Back on December 7, 1990, we blew through our entire budget of resources. By the end of that year, we were already spending faster than Earth could ever hope to replenish itself.
By November 21, 1995, we had already burned through all our available resources. By the end of that year, we were consuming way more than Earth could actually replenish.
By November 1, 2000, we had already burned through all our available resources. By the end of that year, we were consuming way more than Earth could actually replenish.
By October 20, 2005, we had already burned through all our available resources. By the end of that year, we were consuming way more than Earth could actually replenish.
Back on October 26, 2007, we hit the limit. By the end of that year, we were burning through resources faster than Earth could ever hope to replenish them.
By September 23, 2008, we had already burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were living way beyond our means, consuming far more than Earth can actually replenish.
By September 25, 2009, we had already burned through all our available resources. From then until the end of the year, we were basically spending way more than Earth could actually replenish.
Back on August 21, 2010, we officially burned through all our resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were essentially spending way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Back on August 27, 2011, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were basically living on credit, consuming way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Back on August 22, 2012, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were essentially living on credit, consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
Back on August 20, 2013, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were basically spending way faster than Earth could ever hope to replenish.
Back on August 19, 2014, we officially burned through all our resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were living on borrowed time, consuming way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Back on August 13, 2015, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were basically living on credit, consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
Back on August 3, 2016, we officially burned through everything we had. From that point on, we were just living on credit—consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
By August 2, 2017, we had already burned through everything we were supposed to have. From that point until the end of the year, we were just living on credit—consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
By July 29, 2018, we had already burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were living way beyond what Earth can actually replenish.
By July 30, 2019, we had already burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were consuming way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Here’s how the "Overshoot Day" numbers looked across various countries back in 2019: [Link to an image regarding Earth Day]
Look at the numbers. By April 27th this year, the US had already burned through its entire annual supply of resources. Everything we consume from that point until the end of the year is basically living on credit—we're just overdrawing our planetary account. The only reason the rest of the world manages to hold out until late July is because those economies aren't strong enough to keep up with our pace. If they were, we would have tapped out everything we own by now. Here in America, we're constantly pulling more from nature than we actually possess. Back in 2010, we used up 43% more farmland than what’s actually available in the US. That's the real cost of our lifestyle: we're cannibalizing other parts of the world just to keep things running.
Space threats. Where exactly are we right now? For the moment, we’re sitting ducks.
Here’s another way humanity could go extinct, and politicians everywhere just ignore it: asteroid impacts. Every year, chunks of rock—big and small—zip past Earth. So far, we’ve been lucky. We haven't taken a direct hit yet. Organizations like NASA have specialized observatories trying to spot these space rocks before they become problems. But looking at the data from recent years, I've noticed a pattern. Even with all our radar, telescopes, and high-tech gear, these things slip through the cracks more often than they should. We’ve dodged bullets because of luck and the way planetary gravity works, but scientists are unanimous on one thing: it’s only a matter of time before a rock hits us, and that would end civilization as we know it. Then there's the solar stuff. A single massive solar flare could wipe out our satellite communications. If that happens, everything goes dark—banking systems, power grids, essential electronic comms. Total chaos. Astronomers have been shouting about these threats for decades, pushing for ways to shield the planet, but nobody wants to foot the bill. There are plenty of theories and defense projects on paper, but no government wants to actually invest the cash into planetary defense. The scary part? An observatory might spot an object heading straight for us, and by then, it'll be too late. We are completely defenseless. We have zero protection. To actually secure the planet, every nation would need to work together, and looking at the state of the world right now, that's a pipe dream.
Look, scientists aren't out there shouting about this just to freak everyone out. They’re trying to raise a collective awareness that’s currently sitting well below zero. It's pathetic, really, because we're basically architecting our own downfall by wrecking the planet we live on. Personally, I don't see a clear way out right now, and I certainly don't give a damn about the media circus surrounding people like Greta. But the problems are real. That's just a fact.
You make some good points, but honestly, it feels like you’re chasing a fantasy. Gravity doesn't run this world; money does. That's the snag. No one in charge is going to ditch their profits just to save the planet. This whole anti-plastic hysteria? It's mostly just a trend. Here in the States, since 2020, they've been phasing out plastic bags, replacing them with these things that look like plastic but are supposedly biodegradable. Sure, sounds nice. But if they try to swap plastic "to go" bottles for heavy glass, sales will tank, and companies won't touch that. Greedy corporations—and let's face it, they all are—aren't going to gamble their survival for an eco-friendly gesture. What about credit cards? We all carry several, and they're plastic. What about computer cases, screens, or the million other things we use daily?
What really gets to me is the mindless waste. We consume stuff so fast that our poor planet can't even begin to replenish itself. People don't even care about the air they breathe anymore; they're too busy endangering the environment by cutting down 30 million acres of forest every year. Even a five-year-old knows plants make the oxygen we need. But apparently, it's more important to clear out half of the Brazilian rainforest for a quick buck. When people prioritize profit over the survival of future generations, those people don't stand a chance.
I won't get into the weeds regarding air quality unless you want a novel, but here are some shots from around the US:
Italy: https://nation.com.pk/print_images/m...35114-8172.jpg
China on a typical day:
Air pollution kills 600,000 kids every single year. Innocent people get sick with various cancers and die through no fault of their own.
The destruction of the ozone layer—something 90% of people don't even realize matters—is one of the biggest threats we face. The sun hits Earth with all sorts of radiation, including ultraviolet rays. There are different types: UVA, UVB, and UVC.
The bulk of UVC radiation is absorbed by the ozone layer (if there is one left).
UVB hits the surface of the skin and directly damages DNA, causing burns.
UVA penetrates deep into the skin, leading to DNA mutations, tanning, and destroying collagen, which makes skin lose its elasticity. It also spikes melanoma risks because of free radical buildup.
You can see the differences here: https://suntribesunscreen.com/wp-con...7nnaupzx44.jpg
Now, about our planet's resources:
From an economic standpoint, humanity has been running a deficit since "Earth Day," because we've already burned through the entire year's worth of resources and have to borrow from the future. This state is called "Overshoot."
The Earth Day concept measures human demand against the global supply of natural resources and ecological capacity. Right now, after only seven months, we've already exhausted all renewable resources that should last at least a full year. We use economic terms like this so that regular people, not just scientists, can wrap their heads around it. Our lifestyle has pushed the planet past its breaking point. Every year, "Overshoot Day" moves earlier. That means we're exhausting the planet's annual budget sooner and sooner. This year, it hit on July 30th. Since then, we've been living on credit, overusing everything the Earth provides.
Here’s a breakdown of the dates and our consumption of Earth's resources over the last few decades:
Back in 1961, our annual consumption sat at just 0.73. That meant we actually had some breathing room left. We still had reserves.
Back on December 21, 1971, our consumption hit 1.01. That was the tipping point. It means we started burning through resources faster than Earth can actually replenish them in a year.
Consumption is just going to keep climbing next year. It's on an upward trajectory.
By December 19, 1987, we had already burned through all our available resources. For the rest of that year, we were consuming way faster than Earth could actually replenish itself.
Back on December 7, 1990, we blew through our entire budget of resources. By the end of that year, we were already spending faster than Earth could ever hope to replenish itself.
By November 21, 1995, we had already burned through all our available resources. By the end of that year, we were consuming way more than Earth could actually replenish.
By November 1, 2000, we had already burned through all our available resources. By the end of that year, we were consuming way more than Earth could actually replenish.
By October 20, 2005, we had already burned through all our available resources. By the end of that year, we were consuming way more than Earth could actually replenish.
Back on October 26, 2007, we hit the limit. By the end of that year, we were burning through resources faster than Earth could ever hope to replenish them.
By September 23, 2008, we had already burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were living way beyond our means, consuming far more than Earth can actually replenish.
By September 25, 2009, we had already burned through all our available resources. From then until the end of the year, we were basically spending way more than Earth could actually replenish.
Back on August 21, 2010, we officially burned through all our resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were essentially spending way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Back on August 27, 2011, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were basically living on credit, consuming way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Back on August 22, 2012, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were essentially living on credit, consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
Back on August 20, 2013, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were basically spending way faster than Earth could ever hope to replenish.
Back on August 19, 2014, we officially burned through all our resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were living on borrowed time, consuming way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Back on August 13, 2015, we officially burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were basically living on credit, consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
Back on August 3, 2016, we officially burned through everything we had. From that point on, we were just living on credit—consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
By August 2, 2017, we had already burned through everything we were supposed to have. From that point until the end of the year, we were just living on credit—consuming way faster than Earth can actually replenish itself.
By July 29, 2018, we had already burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were living way beyond what Earth can actually replenish.
By July 30, 2019, we had already burned through all our available resources. From that point until the end of the year, we were consuming way more than Earth can actually replenish.
Here’s how the "Overshoot Day" numbers looked across various countries back in 2019: [Link to an image regarding Earth Day]
Look at the numbers. By April 27th this year, the US had already burned through its entire annual supply of resources. Everything we consume from that point until the end of the year is basically living on credit—we're just overdrawing our planetary account. The only reason the rest of the world manages to hold out until late July is because those economies aren't strong enough to keep up with our pace. If they were, we would have tapped out everything we own by now. Here in America, we're constantly pulling more from nature than we actually possess. Back in 2010, we used up 43% more farmland than what’s actually available in the US. That's the real cost of our lifestyle: we're cannibalizing other parts of the world just to keep things running.
Space threats. Where exactly are we right now? For the moment, we’re sitting ducks.
Here’s another way humanity could go extinct, and politicians everywhere just ignore it: asteroid impacts. Every year, chunks of rock—big and small—zip past Earth. So far, we’ve been lucky. We haven't taken a direct hit yet. Organizations like NASA have specialized observatories trying to spot these space rocks before they become problems. But looking at the data from recent years, I've noticed a pattern. Even with all our radar, telescopes, and high-tech gear, these things slip through the cracks more often than they should. We’ve dodged bullets because of luck and the way planetary gravity works, but scientists are unanimous on one thing: it’s only a matter of time before a rock hits us, and that would end civilization as we know it. Then there's the solar stuff. A single massive solar flare could wipe out our satellite communications. If that happens, everything goes dark—banking systems, power grids, essential electronic comms. Total chaos. Astronomers have been shouting about these threats for decades, pushing for ways to shield the planet, but nobody wants to foot the bill. There are plenty of theories and defense projects on paper, but no government wants to actually invest the cash into planetary defense. The scary part? An observatory might spot an object heading straight for us, and by then, it'll be too late. We are completely defenseless. We have zero protection. To actually secure the planet, every nation would need to work together, and looking at the state of the world right now, that's a pipe dream.
Look, scientists aren't out there shouting about this just to freak everyone out. They’re trying to raise a collective awareness that’s currently sitting well below zero. It's pathetic, really, because we're basically architecting our own downfall by wrecking the planet we live on. Personally, I don't see a clear way out right now, and I certainly don't give a damn about the media circus surrounding people like Greta. But the problems are real. That's just a fact.
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:Holy Spirit? I have no idea what you mean by that. Care to elaborate?
I'm pulling this straight from my own intuition. I think I've hit on some massive insights here.
So, basically, we both exist and don't exist at the exact same time. I'll explain later why this stance is incredibly practical and has absolutely nothing to do with schizophrenia (which is denying reality, whereas I'm not denying reality—I'm saying it *is* happening, but also it isn't).
Some people claim everything is just an illusion, which basically makes them anti-matter shavers, while others claim everything is material, making them material shavers.
Based on my gut instinct, the truth has to be somewhere in the middle, and here it is.
Once you grasp these insights, you move on to rotation exercises—like, say, flipping the Earth's poles—to turn matter into anti-matter.
Why don't you start over at Fermilab? They've got plenty of anti-matter there, and they've even managed to photograph it. 🙄
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:That was settled ages ago. Those aren't even real questions; it's just some desperate attempt at damage control where people act like judge and jury at the same time.
A question is never actually open-ended when you're already deciding the outcome before asking.
You have a chance to ask an actual, unbiased question here, but you're dodging it.
Why? Because you live to brainwash people. It's your fuel. But hey, it works out for me since this thread always stays pinned at the top of the board.
HAHAHAHAHA, running away again. Seriously, even with topics this basic, you don't have the mental capacity to face an argument or even muster a coherent response. Go wipe your nose and go to bed... there's nothing else you're good for... 😛 You really let me down. 👎
Justin Baker6 said:That was settled ages ago. Those aren't even real questions; it's just some desperate attempt at damage control where people act like judge and jury at the same time.
A question is never actually open-ended when you're already deciding the outcome before asking.
You have a chance to ask an actual, unbiased question here, but you're dodging it.
Why? Because you live to brainwash people. It's your fuel. But hey, it works out for me since this thread always stays pinned at the top of the board.
That statement is pure schizophrenia. Show some proof. You're acting like you possess the wisdom of the Holy Spirit. You've completely lost the plot now... 🤦
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:I still don't see a single actual question from you in this thread, other than the fact that this topic keeps popping up at the top of my feed.
Answer the questions that were actually asked over here:
and right here, to start with:
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:Still avoiding an actual question, I see.
Do I really have to repeat myself? Is that because you couldn't answer or just didn't get it? You're dodging the point again. 😛
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:I haven't heard a single actual question from you, just a pile of brainless ad hominem attacks and prejudices. There are four or five other people here running that exact same tired routine.
I asked one specific question that these idiots don't have an answer for.
Go back and read my posts. You’ll see a mountain of questions you dodged because you simply aren't equipped to handle the topics you bring up. My advice? Sit down, stay a while, and try to actually learn something.
Please move this thread
in Feedback & Suggestions ·
velvetbear372 said:Admin, I’m asking you to please reopen my locked Reddit thread. Reddit thread (which is crucial for this community) move everything from PDF to PDF ASAP. Get it off the FBI files and onto PDF now. The world around me.Also, when you're at it, lock this thread and wipe the posts from the last three pages.
Things are hitting a breaking point, and people need to be warned. We need actual discussion here. But looking at that ridiculous, poorly managed FBI report, there isn't even a mention of this issue. Look at this map. Just look at it. You can see the fires spreading across the landscape like nothing else. It’s hard to ignore when you see the data laid out right in front of you. Reality doesn't care about how much we want to look away. We're looking at an apocalypse.
I wish this whole topic didn't exist. Honestly, I’d prefer if there wasn't even the slightest chance of a discussion happening here. But reality isn't that kind. It drags on, and it's ugly.
If you start that thread again, I’ll give you a proper response. I'll explain exactly what you're talking about, but also why there's a much more immediate, realistic threat facing the entire planet. This isn't some made-up nonsense; it's the actual scientific perspective. So, just take a breath and stop panicking. You have a point, sure, but don't fall for the tabloid sensationalism. We've all heard how many times "the end of the world" has been predicted by now. It’s usually just lazy reporters hyping things up because it's a long summer and they've run out of actual news to cover.
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:Why does a dog bark at an open umbrella instead of a closed one? And don't tell me that wasn't a specific enough question.
You ask a lot of questions. Most of them are nonsense—zero logic, zero arguments, just noise. But here’s the real issue: you can’t actually answer a single question directed at you. It’s not that you won't; it's that you can't. You lack the mental capacity for it. Instead of having the guts or the intelligence to actually debate someone when they present a counter-argument, you just run away and shut up. That's your problem. You're falling straight into the hole you dug for yourself.👎
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:You didn't get the point, and honestly, you don't even want to. I'm just using you to keep myself at the top of the thread, so feel free to keep rambling.
Whether you're using me or not is irrelevant.🤣 You’re basically running a scam here. When you run out of things to say, you just resort to these shallow, one-sentence replies. What would happen if I actually brought up something complex? 😂 It’s all nonsense. You can't even address a comment because you’re too busy parroting whatever some drugged-out guru wrote online. Seriously, try reading an actual book about the topic you’re posting about. You clearly don't understand the subject matter, and you have zero ability to debate anyone who thinks differently than you do. Your vision doesn't extend past your own nose.🤦
Regarding that "top of the feed" comment—how old are you? Ten? It seems like everyone’s already read everything you have to say, so you aren't interesting to anyone. This thread will die out regardless of whether I participate or not... 🤣
I’d love to see you try to explain what thermodynamics actually is. Do you even know which law we're talking about? If I really sat you down and grilled you on it, it might actually be entertaining... 😂
The ultimate thread
in Spirituality ·
Justin Baker6 said:Look, we all pretty much know the deal: ideas start in the mind and eventually turn into reality if they actually serve a purpose.
But could it work the other way around?
Could something already physical undergo dematerialization and loop back into its original concept?
I’m talking about a total reversal—without having to smash some object into pieces to make it happen.
An idea starting in the brain and becoming real: I apply for a job I actually want, and then I get hired.
Justin Baker6 said:Look, we all pretty much know the deal: ideas start in the mind and eventually turn into reality if they actually serve a purpose.
But could it work the other way around?
Could something already physical undergo dematerialization and loop back into its original concept?
I’m talking about a total reversal—without having to smash some object into pieces to make it happen.
Dematerialization: Getting laid off and losing the job.
Any more questions? ☕
Being Ignored
in Psychology ·
bluerider512 said:Has anyone else dealt with being totally ignored by neighbors or people at the bus stop? Like, they won't even give you a nod, even if you’ve known them forever. I don't mean one specific falling out with a single person—I mean when it happens with multiple people at once. It keeps happening to me. I can't tell if people just find me awkward because I'm shy. I'm not exactly the type to go up to strangers and strike up a conversation. Maybe I actually come across as unapproachable..
For example, take the parents of a girl I grew up with in middle school. I see her mom on my way to work most mornings. One morning, she actually said hi and we chatted for a second since it had been a while. Then, the very next morning—and every morning since—total silence. I say hello, and she just ignores me. Yet, I see her greeting everyone else perfectly fine. So, it’s clearly not her personality.
I admit, they're just acquaintances and I shouldn't let it get to me, but it’s starting to really bother me. It makes me feel like there's something fundamentally wrong with me when everyone else gets a friendly "hello" and I don't.
It doesn't apply to everyone, but it definitely applies to quite a few people.
Has anyone else gone through this? How do you handle it? I just want to stop feeling like an idiot.
My issue is the exact opposite. I frequently miss seeing someone I know on the street because I'm stuck in my own head, thinking about work or my plans. When someone tells me, "Hey, I saw you over there and you didn't even notice me," I just explain I was preoccupied. It's a flaw of mine, but it's never personal. Most people get it because they see me being social with them otherwise. If someone gets offended and stays quiet, what am I supposed to do? You can't walk down a sidewalk scanning every face to see if you recognize them just so you can wave. When I'm not "in the clouds" and I spot someone, I'll say hello. If they don't respond, I figure maybe they're just like me and I'll try again next time. If they still don't acknowledge me, I'll go find them and ask what's up if they actually matter to me. If they don't, I move on. If I spent my life overanalyzing every tiny social friction, I wouldn't have time to live. Either ask people what's going on or just forget it. Don't make your own life harder than it needs to be. 🙂
Font size in email signatures?
in Forum Help! ·
Casey Bennett said:here you go🙂
Thanks, looks good now. 🙂
Font size in email signatures?
in Forum Help! ·
Hey Drew Sanchez82, any chance you could scale down your signature font? I’m trying to match yours, but the system won't let me touch BBCode or HTML in my own settings.
Thanks in advance. 🙂
Thanks in advance. 🙂
How to trigger deep thinking mode?
in Psychology & Therapy ·
It’s like baking bread. You need actual ingredients if you want to make something happen. If someone’s head is nothing but empty space, what are they supposed to think with? You can't knead air into a loaf. Take those Instagram influencers, for instance—men and women drifting from one trashy reality TV show to the next, genuinely convinced they have depth or a life worth watching. For people with an actual brain, thinking isn't a choice; the electrical impulses just fire. They don't just blow away in a draft. It's simple math. 🤷
How would you handle dating someone with Bipolar II?
in Psychology & Therapy ·
Nancy Johnson9 said:Hey everyone. So, my husband and I have been married for nine years, and honestly, I’ve always been so proud of us—our bond, our relationship, everything. But lately? I just feel so let down. About two months ago, I finally saw a psychiatrist, got diagnosed with mixed anxiety and depressive disorder, and started taking Zoloft. My husband knows everything because we’ve always been totally open with each other... but now, I get this feeling like he just doesn't care anymore. We've been through such a brutal stretch. First, my depression and anxiety hit me hard, and just when things were starting to look up, my dad almost killed my mom. That just absolutely broke me all over again. And look, he isn't some jerk—we get along, and he's technically "there" for me. But it feels like he's not really *there*. We have two kids, ages 7 and 3. I’m basically running the whole show for them, doing everything I can to hold it together so they don't feel the weight of what's happening to me. All I need is him. Just a hug, someone to ask how I'm actually doing, or if I need anything... just some encouragement. Or even just a laugh. But nope. He just says "it'll be fine" and plays video games (and yeah, he does spend time with the kids, it's not like he's ignoring them entirely). Work is stressing him out so much that I feel like he's just focused on his career and nothing else. I work too, and I make just as much as he does, yet I'm still the one carrying the entire mental load of the house. It’s exhausting. When I try to tell him, or even write it down, he gets a little defensive, but then nothing changes. It's like he's decided to just tune me out. I get it, I really do—it’s not easy being with me right now either. But damn, we said "in sickness and in health, for better or for worse," didn't we? Yesterday, I finally told him I'm done. I'm throwing in the towel. I told him I accept this is how it is and I'm done begging him to actually notice me. He was completely blindsided. Like, "Wait, why??" Well, for crying out loud, I told him why. Because I just can't do this anymore.
What caught my eye was seeing you write out this exact checklist of demands—what he needs to say and how he needs to act. You've put yourself front and center, which makes sense since you're struggling. But you seem to have forgotten he isn't sick. He can't read your mind or meet every single need exactly the way you've scripted it in your head. From what I can tell, he isn't treating you poorly. It feels like you might be suffocating him with these requirements and these blowups because he isn't catering to you constantly. Even here, you criticized him for playing games, only to defend him a second later. In reality, you're letting him slip away from you because he dares to take a moment to unwind instead of focusing entirely on your crisis. Look, I don't have a diagnosis, so I'm looking at this from the perspective of your husband. He’s shown he cares, yet you keep pushing him to the edge just to force a confirmation that he does. Why? Because he missed a beat or didn't say the exact thing you programmed him to say? If you can, stop doing this. You're going to drive him away. It's not easy carrying the weight of two lives on his shoulders while managing his own life, which isn't easy either, all while helping with the kids. Try showing a little empathy for someone else's reality instead of only looking inward at your illness.
He doesn't need to check in on your every move if he's present and stepping up with the kids. Don't you see that's his way of showing love and support? You seem to need verbal validation constantly—needing to hear he loves you, that you're okay, that your illness isn't a burden. I'm sure it isn't a burden to him, as long as you don't turn it into one. Remember, this illness affects both of you. To actually make this work, maybe talk to your doctor about how to build a peaceful home despite the struggle. This condition might be part of you forever, but that doesn't mean you can't have a good life with your husband and kids without the constant insecurity and drama. Take your meds, follow the doctor's lead. You have everything you need for a happy life. You're dealing with a health issue, but you aren't the center of the universe, and you aren't alone just because he isn't giving you 100% of his attention every single second. If you can grasp that, things will get easier.
How to tell my parents I'm dating at 23?
in Psychology ·
ruggedcyclist64 said:Hey everyone.
I’m not quite sure which sub this belongs in—apologies if this isn't strictly psychological territory.
Here’s the deal: I’m 23, and I’ve finally entered my first serious relationship. I’ve always been the introverted, reserved type—the kind who stays in and avoids the social scene—so meeting people just hasn't been my thing.
My relationship with my parents is... fine, I guess. They don't pry much about my dating life, but they definitely knew I was single. Honestly, I’ve always had this nagging feeling they expected me to stay solo forever, simply because of how quiet I am.
Now that there's actually someone in the picture—and I genuinely enjoy his company—I have no idea how to break the news. It sounds ridiculous, I know, but the sheer awkwardness of it is paralyzing. I’d love to spend the night at his place sometime, but I can't bring myself to do it; I don't want them worrying if they realize I'm not home in the middle of the night.
Having a boyfriend is supposed to be the most normal thing in the world, yet I can't seem to shake this discomfort about my parents knowing. If I were a teenager, maybe it wouldn't feel so heavy.
To be clear, they aren't strict—they never gave me a hard time about dating when I was younger or tried to control who I saw.
Anyway, I’m looking for advice. How do you actually tell your parents? How did you all handle that first conversation? Was it as cringey for you as it is for me?
Are you an adult woman or a fifteen-year-old kid? Look, your issue is psychological, and you're looking in the wrong place. Just bring it up casually when talking to your mom—mention you have a boyfriend now and things are going well. That’s it. Why are you making public posts to your parents? It sounds incredibly immature and codependent. This is YOUR private, intimate life; there's no reason to broadcast it everywhere. If you're staying over at his place, just tell Mom you're sleeping at his house and be done with it. Dads tend to be different with their daughters; they’re always paranoid someone’s going to take advantage of them. That's why I'm telling you: talk to your mom, it shouldn't be a big deal. Maybe it feels like a massive leap to you, but having a boyfriend at your age is the most normal thing in the world. Your parents don't really have a say here, but if they're acting the way you described, then there isn't much else to think about.