What happens and how can I help when my dad starts forgetting things?
in Psychology & Therapy ·
I don't believe the law has feelings. It’s pretty binary—you either have a right to something or you don't. Whether he owes child support or not is a matter of facts: if the daughters are adults and aren't in school, then no. If they are, then yes. You can eventually force that through a US court, though it might take a decade.
Marital assets follow the same logic; the process plays out exactly how the law dictates. You might walk away with more than just an apartment, or you might walk away with nothing. There isn't much philosophy involved. As for the daughters being angry at their father, whether they choose to be or not is entirely their prerogative. People shouldn't try to manipulate those emotions or interfere with how they feel about him. They can feel whatever they want; it's none of your business. That relationship belongs to them and their father. You can have an opinion, sure, but there's no need to force it on them, right? Besides, it clearly hurts when your own daughters blame you for the divorce. Maybe they're right, though?
The real issue here is the emotional fallout—the perception that the other woman is "winning" while you're struggling with two daughters and he's living the high life. It’s essentially jealousy. But the law will settle its part in due time, won't it?
Personally, I find nothing more exhausting than people clawing at each other over property after a divorce. I built everything I own from scratch and I wouldn't give up a cent, but I'd also happily hand over every bit of my husband's estate just to be done with him. Let him keep it. As long as I'm healthy, I'll have enough for myself; I have no interest in fighting over his mansion or his cars.
And since the daughters are adults... look, my parents never gave me anything, so I don't understand why these girls expect anything from their father—especially one who is divorced and hasn't even been living under the same roof as them. I just don't get it.
Marital assets follow the same logic; the process plays out exactly how the law dictates. You might walk away with more than just an apartment, or you might walk away with nothing. There isn't much philosophy involved. As for the daughters being angry at their father, whether they choose to be or not is entirely their prerogative. People shouldn't try to manipulate those emotions or interfere with how they feel about him. They can feel whatever they want; it's none of your business. That relationship belongs to them and their father. You can have an opinion, sure, but there's no need to force it on them, right? Besides, it clearly hurts when your own daughters blame you for the divorce. Maybe they're right, though?
The real issue here is the emotional fallout—the perception that the other woman is "winning" while you're struggling with two daughters and he's living the high life. It’s essentially jealousy. But the law will settle its part in due time, won't it?
Personally, I find nothing more exhausting than people clawing at each other over property after a divorce. I built everything I own from scratch and I wouldn't give up a cent, but I'd also happily hand over every bit of my husband's estate just to be done with him. Let him keep it. As long as I'm healthy, I'll have enough for myself; I have no interest in fighting over his mansion or his cars.
And since the daughters are adults... look, my parents never gave me anything, so I don't understand why these girls expect anything from their father—especially one who is divorced and hasn't even been living under the same roof as them. I just don't get it.