Do we actually like old people? And why (or why not)?
in Psychology ·
Brenda Booth5 said:The truth is, most people just don't like them—at least, the vast majority doesn't. It’s just human nature, really. You can't fight it. And then you have to factor in the inevitable reality of aging... those degenerative changes that disrupt everything about a person's life, affecting both them and everyone around them. So, here we are.
It’s an undeniable fact, though certainly not a pleasant one, because it serves as a litmus test for someone's character. Nobody finds it easy to deal with the slowing down, the cognitive decline, the loss of mobility... honestly, it’s unrealistic to expect the younger generation to completely sacrifice their own lives to manage it, but it is reasonable to expect that we provide our own elders with a dignified experience of aging and passing away.
They don't say "we all grow old" for nothing; none of us are going to be galloping around in perfect health at 70, 80... A little bit of empathy goes a long way.
Edit: As for those "difficult" seniors you run into at the grocery store or out on the street... if they are being difficult now, they were likely just as stubborn when they were younger.
I really don't have any reason to dislike older people or lack compassion for them. I've always been the type to help someone up a flight of stairs or fix their phone settings when they're struggling with technology.
But there’s a difference between being helpful and dealing with unprovoked, baseless complaining. When people start lecturing me or nitpicking without cause, I find I have to step back. I usually just tell them, "Look, we're just in different stages of life right now," and we won't see eye to eye. Once we create that distance, everything works fine and everyone goes about their business.
rustyharbor3 said:Of course they hate them. Who actually wants to look at wrinkled faces and decaying bodies that serve as nothing more than a grim, constant reminder of our own mortality and inevitable decline?
As Rosita says, how we treat the elderly is the ultimate litmus test—it’s the clearest indicator of whether we have any actual humanity left in us or not.
There is a massive difference between a casual interaction with a stranger and living under the same roof as someone like that. I know a few guys my age who had constant friction with their grandmothers. There would be daily clashes between the grandson, his mother, and the grandmother herself. But once those guys moved out, they told me that visiting Grandma once or twice a month actually became quite relaxing, and they genuinely enjoy seeing her.