Red flags and manipulation in relationships
in Psychology ·
Drew Perez9 said:Alright folks, I’m opening this thread to act as a sort of unofficial advice column here.🙂
First question on the table: how do you avoid those exhausting little dating games? You know the drill—you reach out, they ghost you, then suddenly they pop up out of nowhere, or if you don't reply instantly, they start blowing up your phone asking why you're ignoring them. Has anyone else dealt with this kind of manipulation? I brought it up to my girlfriends, and honestly, they don't see what the big deal is. They actually seem totally down for it, arguing that you have to "prove yourself" when you're the new one in the mix. They claim this whole hunter-versus-prey dynamic is actually desirable. Is that true? Or isn't genuine passion and attraction enough?
Oh, you innocent little thing🤣 calling all that manipulation! When I saw the title, I thought we were talking about something serious, but then I read this...
Look, those are just games. It's just what you do at the start of a relationship to test the waters, and honestly, it's totally fine. You're testing the situation. For example, I might not reply to a text for a bit—not because I'm playing games, but because I'm actually busy doing something real, and a text can wait, right?—and I want to see how they react to the fact that I actually have a life that matters more than staring at a screen. Trust me, I've sniffed out plenty of possessive psychos this way. If I haven't even looked at a message five minutes after it was sent because I'm tied up, and they're already foaming at the mouth about "eternal love," the "meaning of life," or "why don't you love me?"—yeah, run. 😂
As for being a manipulator, I'm actually a pro at it. 😉 It's practically a natural talent, but I would NEVER use it in a relationship. I've never manipulated my family or anyone I actually care about. I truly don't get the mindset of people who manipulate their boyfriends or girlfriends. Except for those gold diggers out there, I guess. Hey, everyone finds their own way to survive in this world.