Life after bankruptcy: How are you doing?
in Psychology ·
Jerry Robinson56 said:Depression is a relatively standard occurrence; it can linger for quite some time or even settle into a chronic state. It seems to me that disappointment was the catalyst for everything you're feeling. There is absolutely no reason to feel shame over failure. You have managed to pick yourself up after your setbacks and maintain your sanity—that is, in itself, a massive achievement.
Time moves quickly, so spend as much time as possible with your child. Don't lose sleep over friends. Friendships that have lasted decades often fracture over the most trivial matters; new connections will inevitably surface in time. Try to be of service to someone else. Start a small project, perhaps something like tidying up the common area outside your apartment building. Initiate change. Ask someone for their assistance. Whatever you do, do not retreat into your house or isolate yourself. That approach does nothing to resolve your current circumstances. It is entirely possible that being let down by someone you expected to support you is what triggered this entire episode.
You have come to realize the ephemeral nature of everything, and a certain amount of fear has accumulated as a result. My friend's grandparents actually went bankrupt three times in the United States during the last century. They eventually struck it rich and moved back home to buy two houses in Chicago and an estate just before the war, only to lose everything during World War II. Just imagine that...
Things can always be worse 😁 ... Take care of your health, and remember that the most important thing is that you have kept your family intact.
I’m with you on this one. In my opinion, this whole state of mind is being driven by an incredibly stressful, existential period of uncertainty.
You listed several gutsy decisions that ended up saving both you and your family. Sure, your history is turbulent, but it’s also going to be a powerful lesson for your grandkids one day. That’s how I see it, looking at it from a third-person perspective.
What you’re experiencing is likely something else entirely. You probably can't even wrap your head around the idea that this could all have a happy ending. But I’ve realized this is a long game. The apathy, the fear, the general dissatisfaction, the numbness—those aren't just random feelings; they are symptoms telling you, "Hey, I need help." Problems can be a good thing; they get the gears turning in our heads and bodies. But sometimes, those gears only start turning effectively if two heads are working on them instead of one. So, please, go find someone to help you navigate this. You can even find therapists covered by Medicare (with certain providers), and that time spent could be the investment you make to become a better man for your wife and son.
I really hope you find the courage to take one more brave step. Think about it: didn't you feel even a tiny bit better just by typing this out? Now, imagine having someone dedicate their entire professional life to sitting down with you, untangling all of this, and restructuring the nightmare inside your head into something manageable!