Fruit Loops nobody can give you a guarantee on that. You know it too. My kid won't be the oldest either—there are plenty of older kids still stuck in preschool because they started late.
Look, I’m not out here demanding my kid gets some saintly teacher because that's just not realistic. It’s not like I had one bad year in school; my husband and I both dealt with crappy teachers from elementary through college. And I'm not talking about grades—I earned those myself when I didn't study. I'm talking about the vibe between the teacher and the student. There were a few rare gems who were actually decent humans, people I still respect today. But most of them? Totally ideological hacks who micromanage your life and insult you over nothing. Not once, either—it was constant throughout our entire education. So, go ahead, tell me how you guys "approve" of that system!
I've gone through four different trade schools plus college. So yeah, my path wasn't exactly your standard K-12 straight shot.
It’s totally standard procedure. I talked to them myself, plus a special ed teacher who went through the whole thing alone.
And seriously, do you guys just live life with zero fears?
If a person doesn't have any fear, they're either crazy or something is seriously off.
Apparently, it's "contradictory" to feel scared when someone explains—after talking directly to the CDC and a specialist—that this is just how things work.
Looks like none of you have ever actually dealt with people driven by ideology. So, when someone describes what that looks like in the real world, suddenly everything is "contradictory." Either it clashes with your little principles, you haven't experienced it firsthand, or you're one of those ideological types feeling personally attacked.
Not trying to sound like a broken record here, but based on my own experience dragging through the school system and seeing what my husband dealt with, we just decided to wait until the little guy was actually born before making any calls about starting school.
I’m just calling it like I see it based on the professionals I've dealt with my whole life. And yeah, I mentioned people who work with kids but shouldn't be allowed anywhere near them. If you want to roll your eyes at me, go ahead. Seriously. When your kid gets bullied by someone, feel free to just roll your eyes too. Tell them "that's life, get used to it."
Even Verdan said it herself—some experts are total trash and some are actually okay. Some people are just garbage and some aren't. Apparently, I fall into the "trash" category because we asked for a delay and actually got it. Like I'm the only person in America who ever requested a delay and supposedly "crippled" their kid just because they're spending another year in daycare instead of starting first grade.
Look, I'm all for helping the CSS if they actually need it. But why should I jump the line for something I don't even need? They themselves said the kid is perfectly healthy, so why would I snatch resources away from someone who actually needs them?
My little one’s already practicing writing and drawing—hasn't quite cracked reading yet. We play constantly, hit the beach every day, he plays with other kids and his sister, goes fishing with Dad all the time, can use a computer, and speaks both English and Italian without me lifting a finger... even though I mostly speak English to him while we play... etc, etc.
I'll be sending my kid to school, obviously. I'm not breaking any laws or anything crazy. This delay was granted legally; I didn't just pull it out of thin air.
Besides, you go to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to file a statement confirming the child doesn't have a disability or developmental issues. That's exactly how they determine if someone actually qualifies for that kind of assistance. We don't qualify, and I have zero interest in taking what isn't mine.
Sorry if I misremembered you saying that. I just remember reading your take in that thread and it stuck with me.
My kid won't be the oldest in his class—he’s got buddies who were held back too, born in early 2010.
Like I told my friend—she’s a special ed specialist working both at the local preschool and the elementary school here—she asked for a deferral for her son, too. He’s totally on track, socially solid, can read and write, all that good stuff. She got the green light. She actually has three kids, and there are others in that same preschool who got a delay just because their parents requested it.
We just asked, and everyone was cool with it. Nobody rolled their eyes or acted like the kid would fall behind in life. Honestly, people were telling us, "Good call." We didn't bribe anyone or pull any strings through connections. Surprising, right?? Apparently, that's how things work in America.
So yeah, around this part of the US, they're pretty chill about it. Getting the paperwork from social services is just standard procedure. I already mentioned who gets approved.
The official notice doesn't explain *why* he got it, just that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, under the Department of Education, agrees with the committee's decision based on all the files from the psychologists, speech therapists, and school doctors. It’s for a perfectly healthy, well-adjusted kid who basically taught himself English just by watching TV and cartoons.
I’m just thankful I have two healthy kids.
Also, I was calling out the communists, the ultra-right wingers, and the religious zealots—not the extremists if you can't tell the difference, I can't help you.
I wasn't throwing around "expert" opinions; I was just describing the actual process for delaying enrollment. You know, the whole runaround with the preschool psychologist, the hospital specialists, the speech therapist, school med, and even the dentist.
And seriously, it's not like 🙄 we pulled some crazy stunt or anything. We went through the proper channels and got the deferral because we were straight up honest about what we wanted. And nobody—literally nobody—gave us grief or fought us on it. Does that even register with you people?!
As for you implying my kid has "problematic parents"—maybe take a look at your own families and how you treat your kids. Or your parents and grandparents and what they did in the past.
Hey, let's go. Let's throw the first stone if we're gonna play that game. Is that what we're doing?
My kids have everything they need. They're well-adjusted, not spoiled, and they never throw tantrums in public or at home. We handle everything by talking to them on their level. They go on trips abroad every month, we're always with them, and they get 3-5 hot meals a day. We're hands-on, but I've never said a bad word about school to my little one because I know how much that matters. He loves preschool. We never force them into anything. There were times they didn't want to get in the pool, so I just wiped them down with a warm towel. If they didn't want to eat something, I just made something else. It's always about understanding, never force.
My kids come first. Period.
I never said I'm with my child 24/7; I meant every parent is (figuratively speaking). Try reading with a little comprehension.
If you guys think being a "junkie" is a vibe, then go ahead and let your kids be raised by them. See if I care.
It's not like I'm acting superior or anything. I'm not. I'm flawed, and so were my parents. I'll be the first to admit it. But since my husband and I have been through some stuff in life, we figured we'd use that knowledge to make sure our kid doesn't have to struggle through the same thing.
Would it kill you to make life a little easier for your own kid once in a while?
Delaying school isn't delaying life; it's just a 365-day delay. That's nothing compared to a lifetime.
My bad, I said I'm with my kid 24 hours a day, but I meant figuratively, not literally.
urbantinker8 my kid is back in regular daycare now, so after that whole delay, they won't be stuck at home 24/7 anymore. The daycare psychologist, the school psychologist, the school nurse, even the specialists over at the Seattle medical center—everyone agreed on the delay. This isn't just me making stuff up, I swear. I only asked because my kid just isn't ready for school yet. That's it!
Didn't mean you northerntiger9. Someone mentioned earlier that I can't stand communists, which is true—so what? Where else am I gonna go where they aren't lurking around? I mean, once those guys kill your parents in some random field, you realize being "outside the party" isn't exactly a vibe. They just aren't my cup of tea.
And just because I have a Seattle area code doesn't mean I actually live in Seattle or anything. I know how to check out alternatives, thanks for the links though.
The CSS can't just overrule an IRS decision 🤦! It's not like they're the legislative branch or anything. My god, people here clearly have zero clue how basic law works.
Are you guys even listening to yourselves? This isn't about overturning a ruling—it's just about getting a statement confirming my kid doesn't have disabilities or special needs.
So apparently, if I mention anything bad about the old communists, I’m instantly labeled some hardcore far-right zealot or an ultra-orthodox Catholic.
It’s wild how fast people sell out their own principles just to pick a side, acting like they’re clutching their party membership cards tight, praying the old regime rises from the grave.
Same old crowd running this school I went to, too. You’ll never get anywhere here unless you play their game.
The kids of the local political elite basically run the place. Even that junkie who runs gymnastics with the kids—he and a bunch of others from my generation got all the perks just because their parents were party loyalists, not because they actually worked hard.
Just asking... would you even let your kid join an activity if you knew exactly what kind of person was running it and what they've done in the past?
Look, I wouldn't go hunting for a 5 for myself, let alone my kid, if they hadn't actually put in the work or mastered the material. Never been my style. You get what you earn, period.
All this talk about "dirty laundry" can be handled with a massive eye roll or a prayer, honestly. But the second one of those so-called "experts" starts testing their knowledge—or lack thereof—on your kids, I bet you won't find it so funny. It’s easy to act all high and mighty when we're airing out the dirty laundry of politicians or CEOs; everyone loves a scandal. But the moment you point out the local bureaucrats holding the reins? Suddenly it's "too much." What, we feeling personally attacked or something?
The law is the law, and yeah, I used it.
I was just asking if anyone knew the procedure, only to find out the "pros" don't even know who gets copies of the official decisions. So much for knowing the legal framework and understanding why the Secret Service calls for a statement.
Every parent knows what's best for their kid—they're the ones actually living it.
Same here. My kid, my headache. Not the government's, not anyone else's. When things go south, like with health issues or whatever, nobody else is gonna jump in to save the day.
And look, this isn't some weird obsession or me just making excuses. It's straight from experience after dealing with our broken-down school system.
Latest disaster? Our local elementary school. My kid spent the whole year coasting with Cs, learning absolutely nothing and just being a total nuisance in class. Then, right at the end of the term, suddenly he's pulling Bs. The teachers basically handed him those grades just so they could be done with him.
So you've got these "experts"—yeah, right—who are supposed to be shaping kids' futures. They have all these resources like tutoring and specialized programs, yet my son didn't see a single bit of help or an adapted curriculum all year. But sure, under the watchful eye of the principal, the counselor, and the school psychologist, they just gift him passing grades to clear their desks.
It’s totally insane, no matter how you look at it.
If I have the legal right to push back because I know my kid isn't ready—since I’m with him 24/7 and actually see what he can handle—then why should some school doctor decide for me? This guy, who hadn't even seen my child before today, expects him to draw a perfect circle, touch his toes, and tell him where he lives. I heard and saw this myself. That’s NOT an assessment of whether a kid is ready for kindergarten or not. IT ISN'T!
And this "doctor" should be setting an example by actually talking to kids—asking what they like, how they play, maybe having them draw their mom or dad... instead of rushing through a five-minute checkup. And we aren't the only ones dealing with this kind of nonsense.
To make things worse, when you walk into the office, the doctor just tosses his civilian clothes on the floor instead of using the damn hanger right in front of him.
So these are the "experts" deciding if someone is ready for school based on three random things? Give me a break. It’s pure, old-school bureaucratic garbage. Just everyone lumped together in one giant, mindless pile. Then they act shocked when kids don't learn at the exact same pace. People are born individuals; you have to treat every kid uniquely. We aren't clones—if we were, we'd all look the same and there wouldn't be any men or women. Even siblings have totally different personalities, let alone a bunch of random kids being tested. Kids are different, people are different... But these guys just follow a rigid checklist without any actual questions. They’re just going through the motions to get the job done so they can go home early.
Honestly, nothing has changed since my childhood. Nothing at all!
Total systemic failure.
Look, you have a legal right to free healthcare, right? But if you're never sick, why would you ever use it? Hypothetically speaking... Or do you think the health insurance premiums taken out of your paycheck actually cover the cost of seeing a doctor every month? Let's be real... they don't come close.
It is my legal right to use those services, and that's exactly what I did. Because tell me, if my kid starts school and struggles to keep up or follow lessons... are YOU going to pay for his private tutors? Are YOU going to take responsibility for the trauma caused to a child because they were pushed too hard? Are YOU going to sit with him every night and stress him out just because he "has" to learn?
The answer is no. I will. Because I'm the parent. If I can make things easier for my kid and save him from a year of misery, and I have the legal right to do so, then I'm doing it. The government gives me the green light.
Clearly, the procedure exists, it just isn't applied consistently across the US because people in offices just do whatever they want and answer to nobody. Look at what happened recently in San Francisco—kids getting caught up in legal mess and stuff like that...
If the NCAA and these doctors actually did their jobs properly, this kind of crap wouldn't happen so easily, and people wouldn't be getting screwed over. Nobody is innocent here...
I've seen plenty of these "quasi-experts"—psychologists, sociologists, whatever. Some were practically neighbors. For instance, there was this psychologist whose husband used to hunt her down through the neighborhood, yelling at her to just go home and be with her kids instead of wandering around. She worked at a school and even taught me psychology once. Total nutcase.
Then there was a school counselor who lived near me because I moved around a lot in the same city. The woman fought with her husband every single day; we had to listen to it, and she treated her two daughters so badly the little ones were terrified to even look anyone in the eye.
Now, the current school psychologist? Her dad is a complete disaster—not about me, but the whole town knows it. Her uncle tried to kill himself, her aunt is a drunk... and the people working with her at the school told me you never know which version of her you're going to get. I know plenty of people who worked at that school, including some of my former classmates.
The latest stunt was on my kid’s skin at a hospital in San Francisco. This doctor actually told me—quote, "I'm gonna screw them over enough by..."—basically saying he’ll just give them the wrong diagnosis and ignore the X-ray and MRI machines sitting right in front of him because he can't be bothered to do his actual job.
It's a total curse—well, maybe an advantage depending on how you look at it—living in a small town where everyone knows everyone's business, yet I'm supposed to trust these people? Please. I wasn't born yesterday, and I'm definitely not crazy enough to believe they can make any real assessment based on a five-minute chat.
Some of the people working with kids in my neck of the woods have pasts so dark they shouldn't even be allowed within ten feet of a child. For instance, this tennis coach—rest his soul—once admitted he slept with about 200 girls aged 12 to 17 who went through the club.
Then there's this drug addict guy from my graduating class. He runs gymnastics for kids now, supposedly because his parents did it and he thinks he's qualified. Yeah, okay.
Two guys running youth sports in my town? One of them slept with a 14-year-old. I know specifically which girl. And they both have degrees in coaching and kinesiology.
Oh, and that social worker who used to be the boss? She personally robbed people who were relying on welfare in my area. Etc., etc...
That's just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to these "experts" and the rest of them...
Born Nov 18, 2010, so he’d be 6 and 10 months by the time he hits elementary school.
I told everyone the second he was born that I’d be pushing for an enrollment delay, and that's exactly what happened. Honestly? I started elementary school at 6 and it was a total nightmare for me. I don't want him going through that same struggle. At 7 and 10 months, he’ll actually have a clue what's going on and things will just be easier.
I was just checking the preschool rosters from when they were born, and there are kids up to 7 months older than him still in daycare. We're definitely not the only ones doing this.
So, I got summoned by Social Services because we requested an enrollment delay for school. According to the paperwork, the notice went out to us, Social Services, the local elementary school, the Department of Health, and the county records office.
Basically, my son doesn't have any disabilities or anything. We just asked for the delay because it's our legal right. He did preschool, which is mandatory anyway. He wasn't in daycare before this. Now that the delay was approved, we enrolled him in a part-time regular daycare program. Kid's fully vaccinated—all the standard stuff plus three extra shots that aren't covered. We actually had to pay for one ourselves, about $1167. Since he was born in 2010, the combo shots weren't free back then, plus we had to cover Rotavirus, Prevenar, and chickenpox.
Why the trip to Social Services? Because they need an explanation from the special education teacher at the elementary school. I actually know her—we were neighbors growing up—and she went through this exact same thing when she requested an enrollment delay for her oldest son. Totally normal kid, zero developmental issues. It’s just how it works; the official enrollment delay paperwork doesn't actually list the reason, it just says "approved."
So yeah, I have to go in and swear under oath that my kid doesn't have a disability, because if he did, we'd be eligible for certain assistance and all that...
It's a total circus just because the paperwork doesn't specify why the delay was requested or whether there are any developmental issues or disabilities involved.
Classic government. They have these massive interconnected computer systems and everyone is walking around with giant smartphones, yet instead of making life easier, they just find new ways to overcomplicate everything.
Now I have to drag both kids down to the Social Services office just to sign a statement. His medical records were already on hand, the school nurse checked him, and even the psychologist said he's fine. But nope!
Need some intel from anyone who’s dealt with school deferrals before.
So, we actually got the extension. My kid is 6.5 right now—he would've started school at 6.10, which is why we pushed for the delay. Even the local elementary school agreed he's just not ready yet. Anyway, I'm wondering if any of you got a call from Child Protective Services asking for a statement? If so, what was that actually about?
I can't help feeling like they're out to get us. But hey, if this is just standard procedure and everyone goes through it, then whatever. It's just that every time I hear "CPS," I have a total panic attack thinking they're gonna come after us or try to take my kids. I know, sounds totally paranoid, but I can't help it. 😢